Jesus uses his influence to pronounce you an evil being, and they crucify you rather than him.

 

*Goes back to December 27th, 1476.*

The time machine blows up, so you're stuck on that timeline forever.

 

-Goes back in time to kill George W. Bush before he becomes president.-

Secret Service does their job and pummels you into a fine paste.

 

*Goes back to the first day of Julius Caesar's rampage across Gaul.*

You are caught up in the rampage.

 

*Goes back to creation of the lightbulb.*

You drop it, Edison cries like the little pansy he is and Tesla shows him how a man makes a light-bulb. Shortly after this the world implodes thanks to Tesla's light bulbs creating a black hole.

 

*Goes back to New Year's of 2000.*

You meet your past self and immediately disappear.

 

Date: December 22nd 2012.

Reason: Either finding proof Earth still is okay, or repopulating Earth.

You are forced to repopulate earth together with goon because Goon did put on his radioactive resistant ninja suit.

 

*goes back to 1000 with a flashlight for [cabbage]s and giggles*

Although you don't get many giggles, you do get a lot of [cabbage], in this case in the form of flying projectiles.

 

*Goes back to tomorrow.*

Tomorrow is yesterday's yesterday. You die.

 

*Goes forwards in time at normal speed*

You get old and die.

 

*Goes back to stop Julius Caesar's assassination.*

You suceed. He dies of lead poisoning moments later.

 

*Goes to the year 4960.*

You appear in the emptiness of space where the Earth used to be before it was blown up by the Zabraks.

 

*Goes back to 1492.*

Y'get shot.

 

*Goes to tomorrow*

You meet the private investigators who came to look into your disappearance.

 

*Goes back 195,395,239 days.*

You get in a fight with a caveman after stepping on his favorite rock. Needless to say, the 7 foot 400 pound goliath wins the brawl.

 

*Goes back to Victory Day.*

You get a bottle of champagne that will be worth thousands of dollars later.

 

*Goes back 124 days.*

You go about a normal day. Nothing interesting happens.

 

*Goes forward to 2/22/22.*

You die from radiation instantly. Draw your own conclusions.

 

*Goes back to the failed launch of project Vanguard.*

You time travel directly onto the launch pad and are vaporized by the ignition.

 

*Travels back to the opening night of Star Wars.*

The crowd beats you up for revealing that Darth Vader is Lukes Fatehr

 

*Eats a sandwhich, goes back in time to the point where there was another sandwhich and keeps eating it ten times until going back to 2/22/2*

You eat one sandwich, but the second sandwich you eat was poisoned by the time-police.

 

*Goes back in time to warn Eddy not to go back in time.*

You didn't specify when, so you get trapped between time, and it rips your essence apart.

 

*travels to 400 AD to seduce a Celtic chick*

But as celtic stuff is breaking up the romans kill you as they think you are a celt.

 

 

I go back in time just before Einstein and tell everybody the theory of relativity and claim I made it.

You're proven wrong.

 

I go back to Pompeii the day before it's destroyed by a volcano and laugh at everyone there.

An angry mob attacks and kills you as the volcano is about to erupt.

 

*travels to the day before Columbia is launched to warn the crew that it's going to explode*