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How to write very bad guides. 5K VIEWS!!!@ONEON


mithos23132

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In honour of all the *cough* high quality guides littering..I mean all the well written guides on this thread I have decided to write my very first guide!

 

 

 

A Guide to Writing Very Bad Guides

 

by

 

Mithos

 

 

 

Table of contents

 

-Title

 

-Table of contents

 

-My guide

 

-FAQ

 

 

 

Step 1- Pick a Topic

 

Any topic! Anything at all! You also need to choose a subject line. Make sure your subject line does not give the reader any indication of your topic. Subject lines such as "Best guide ever made" or "read this plzzzz" are ideal.

 

 

 

Step 2- Write About It!

 

Whatever pops into your mind! Make sure to write your ideas in a scattered and disorganized manner. Do not repeat yourself. If it takes more than five minuites of research, then you are trying way too hard. Write what you know! Don't forget to put your thoughts in an illogical order and use plenty of exclamation marks!!!!!!111

 

 

 

Step 3- The Closing paragraph

 

This is where you request things. Some people like to thank the reader, however this is a great opportunity to beg for things. Ill give an example "THANK yuo for raeding me gide. Plox gives me a full ru0n if my guid3 helps yuo!!11"

 

 

 

Step 4- The lookover

 

Don't spend too much time on this portion. Just a quick scan to make sure yuo didn't make anymistakes in you gide. Make sure that you didn't repeat youreslf at all. Replacing an "e" with a "3" will make you look v3ry clev3r, but thats an advanced technique only.

 

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This would also be the stage where you assign random colours to your headings.

 

You could consider adding an FAQ (frequently asked questions), where you would pretend that people actually cared enough to ask you questions. I have demonstrated the proper use of FAQs below.

 

 

 

 

 

FAQ

 

 

 

Q: About how long do you think I should play runescape before writing a guide?

 

A: I would say somewhere around five minutes, depending on your topic. If it's something really broad (such as covering all aspects of one or more skill(s)) then I would suggest a minimum of ten minutes.

 

 

Q: How should I go about plagiarizing another persons guide?

 

A: Well I would highlight it and then press "copy" and then "paste" it onto your post. Don't worry about posting it on another website because they won't notice. Probably. Trust me.

 

 

 

Q: What are your thoughts regarding writing in all capital letters (cap locks)?

 

A: I THINK IT IS THOUGHTFUL OF THE WRITER TO WRITE IN CAPITALS BECAUSE IT IS EASIER TO READ THE BIG LETTERS! THEY PUT CAP LOCKS ON YOUR COMPUTER FOR A REASON. USE IT! jUST DONT LOOK STUPID BY ACCIDENTLY PRESSING SHIFT AT THE BEGGINING OF THE SENTENCE.

 

 

 

Q: What about images?

 

A: I would use them at your own discretion, however it should fit the topic. If I was writing a guide on killing Elvarg this is what I sould put as an image.

 

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Keep your images unnecessarily large and make sure they are confusing and irrelevant.

 

 

 

Q: People keep making suggestions like "don't write in leet speak", "this isn't even a guide" and "please remove those pornographic pictures from your guide". What should I do?

 

A: Simple. Flame them! For those of you unfamiliar with the term, allow me to demonstrate:

 

Suggestion: This isn't a guide, you have put absolutely no effort into it.

 

Response (flame): You are a moron! You wouldn't know a good guide from your rear end!

 

 

 

Repeat this for every criticism you receive. I guarantee that your thread will not be locked*.

 

 

 

*by "not" I mean definitely

 

Follow these crucial steps and you will have the most bad guide on the website. Just keep in mind that you should never, under any circumstances, repeat yourself.

 

 

 

I would like to sincerely thank an anonymous model who's name I won't mention but rhymes with Com Truise.

 

 

 

Questions? Comments?

 

 

 

This is my very first guide so let me know what you think.

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Golden Sun= the best game ever made?

Farming and construction are dumb. I am proud to have level 1 in both.

How to write very bad guides (B3$7 3\/4R!!!!1)

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Best guide I've ever read. =D>

 

 

 

But maybe mention something about writing in all caps? Nothing beats a pair of aching eyes. :-w

SWAG

 

Mayn U wanna be like me but U can't be me cuz U ain't got ma swagga on.

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u get 9.89997843/10.6. i mean people really just want to see their name by a topic eh?

 

 

 

I know, some of this stuff is absolutly ridiculous. Combat guides that basically say "train on this monster", and nothing else. Do they even think before deciding to make a guide? And thanks for the 93% :lol:

Shutup.jpg

Golden Sun= the best game ever made?

Farming and construction are dumb. I am proud to have level 1 in both.

How to write very bad guides (B3$7 3\/4R!!!!1)

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10/10 but would be better if in all caps so your eyes look like this :shock: :shock:

 

 

 

yes very much so. also its alot easier to read if you put random sentences in size one.

 

 

 

 

 

also you can make the text invivsiblle to standard forums readers unless selected by using the following code:

 

[color=#eeeeee]put ur text here[/color]

 

 

 

i find this helps the readers to understand guides alot better.

 

 

 

BTW dont add tags to your table of contents alltogether and maybe remove your table of contents as it takes up way too much space

 

 

 

10/10 :XD:

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10/10...

 

 

 

did any say AOW? :thumbsup:

Played since February 2001

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13th to 30 hunting

firemaking cape achieved 6th August 2008_-_-_-_Quest cape achieved 19th August 2009

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excellent gide 10/10

 

 

 

Only criticism is your grammar is too good.

 

 

 

Personally, I'd vote for tic-tacs any day btw

Don't follow me. You might not make it.

All your accounts are belong to us now.
If this were a dictatorship, it'd be a heck of a lot easier, just so long as I'm the dictator
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I'll give it a ten if you add something about people who just joined TIF yesterday, have NO idea what a good guide contains because they've never read any guides in the AOW or in this forum, and post FIVE of this type of "bad guide" on the same day, seeking instant fame?

 

 

 

Oh, and don't forget to identify guides copied word for word (including misspellings) from guides written by other people on the RS forums or other websites, and claiming them as one's own work. :roll:

 

 

 

I especially like "the most bad guide" ending sentence, instead of "the worst" - drives home the point, lol.

 

 

 

And no, to you AOW-ers, I can't keep this topic open forever, but ... for a little while. ;) It made me smile, :D I've been wishing I could write this myself. :-w

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it's a lot easier to get over yourself when you look at intelligence the same way you look at beauty, or height, or eye color: being smart is easy, but being good is hard ... being smart is handed to you, being good is handed to *nobody*.

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You seem to have forgotten that they have probably never heard of a dictionary, and that they have worse grammer than a blind ant.

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There are 10 types of people in the world - those that know binary and those that have a social life

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you just wrote one :lol: :XD:

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^^ click my sig for my lesser ranging guide ^^

jwrm22: 4816th > 99 cooking 100% f2p !1172 total! + 140mil in items.

i dont play anymore... i think rs is ruined

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this has the potential to become a REALLY good guide. pm me on TIF if u want my help..cuz im sick of seeing zillions of guides about the same thing or a guide that restates what another guide says

 

 

 

i think this has been done before but in the positive point of view

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Click here to see my goals and achievements thread

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this has the potential to become a REALLY good guide.

 

I bet Mithos is thinking very bad words because of you :lol:

 

Teh G|_|I|)3 !$ gR3/-\T. I()/i()

Matt: You want that eh? You want everything good for you. You want everything that's--falls off garbage can

Camera guy: Whoa, haha, are you okay dude?

Matt: You want anything funny that happens, don't you?

Camera guy: still laughing

Matt: You want the funny shit that happens here and there, you think it comes out of your [bleep]ing [wagon] pushes garbage can down, don't you? You think it's funny? It comes out of here! running towards Camera guy

Camera guy: runs away still laughing

Matt: You think the funny comes out of your mother[bleep]ing creativity? Comes out of Satan, mother[bleep]er! nn--ngh! pushes Camera guy down

Camera guy: Hoooholy [bleep]!

Matt: FUNNY ISN'T REAL! FUNNY ISN'T REAL!

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Why do we need a guide on how to teach people how to make bad guides, theres enough bad guides out there. I suggest we make more guides on how to make a good guide yet I doubt any of them will read it.

 

 

 

And I doubt I will understand anything I just wrote if I read it over so I won't bother...why and I writing this....wait did I leave the stove on?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Oh nose.

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