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"I want a girlfriend/boyfriend", and other such relationship advice


Da_Latios

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I don't have that much experience but your profile will get dinged as far as visibility goes since you won't be getting matches so I'd hold off.

 

If you're gay you can use a picture of a tree and still get hook-ups via Grindr tho. Lol. (Someone with a profile pic of the sky wanted to pay me for discreet hook ups, but I ain't no garden tool).

 

I've gotten two likes since I updated my profile but they were from ... less than attractive women. But it's an improvement.

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Alright so if I have really shit pictures right now should I wait on making a tinder/okc/etc. until I have pictures worth posting or can I make it now and hold off on using it until then?

You can't have just shit pictures. You've gotta have at least one photo already, which is at least a wee bit flattering.

And just that one pic is enough. For a start.

 

But seriously, getting good photos takes one night out with a mate who knows how to use a camera.

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So I've noticed this thread's regulars all follow similar trends.

 

RPG is constantly dealing with psycho exes.

Muggi reminds us of the joys of polygamy.

Saq is totally oblivious to how much chicks dig him.

I strike out every other week.

Kalphite wages a war against the friend zone.

Randox pretty much stays rational.

Etc, etc

 

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I've been doing some research and I don't have much high-quality evidence but it looks like putting bisexual on my profile is hurting my chances.

 

I only came out recently and haven't been in any relationships (only on the occasional date) so it's not like I've had much time to deal with it, but it looks like bisexuals (and especially bisexual men) face a lot of discrimination re: relationships. So I'm thinking of either creating a straight OkCupid profile and/or a gay one (creating two profiles kind of breaks OkCupid's TOS AFAIK) and seeing how that changes things.

 

Also apparently some (a lot?) of women are averse to guys having sucked dick (hypocrites lol), for example. I've actually experienced this one personally (from talking to someone else about their relationships...).

 

I'll need to get like 3-4 more pictures though ugh.

 

@obfuscator: it was a joke :P. Since both straight women and gay/bi men "perform oral sex" (so medical), it's hypocritical for one to disapprove of the other doing it. Obviously that's not 100% accurate but if every joke had to be 100% accurate you kind of limit yourself lol.

Edited by Veiva
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Go with having a straight profile directed at women and a gay profile directed at men. Literally no one will notice because the pools of people never overlap

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Quote

 

Quote

Anyone who likes tacos is incapable of logic.

Anyone who likes logic is incapable of tacos.

 

PSA: SaqPrets is an Estonian Dude

Steam: NippleBeardTM

Origin: Brand_New_iPwn

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Yeah that's what I'm going to do.

 

I got mixed feedback from people I know and don't know in person so I'm not sure about the bio. I was told it was too long, others loved it, so aah.

 

I'm going to try Tinder with  a condensed bio and see how that goes, with the longer bio on OkCupid. Going to use new pictures for both.

 

[spoiler=bio idea #1 for Tinder]Constantly doing new things, going new places, and meeting new people. Big on self improvement and mindfulness.  Takes care of myself so others don't have to. Ambitious, motivated, and disciplined.

Looking for an equal to help take over the world or grab a coffee. Whichever fits your schedule. :)

Working on a degree in Computer Science. Have a good job in software development so I can pay for such luxuries such as both Netflix and Hulu.

 

 

[spoiler=bio idea #2 for Tinder (rly short)]

Looking for an equal to help take over the world or a grab a drink. Whichever fits your schedule :). I know a few good places.

Working on a BS in CS. Have a good job so I can pay for both Hulu and Netflix.

 

 

 

it's kind of generic again but Tinder is more looks centric so idk

 

so far for the first picture:

 

 

 

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A

 

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B

 

 

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I like bio #2, but I think your prior pictures were better

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Quote

 

Quote

Anyone who likes tacos is incapable of logic.

Anyone who likes logic is incapable of tacos.

 

PSA: SaqPrets is an Estonian Dude

Steam: NippleBeardTM

Origin: Brand_New_iPwn

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I made a fake okc as a girl profile and holy shit no wonder I wasn't getting matches. 9/10 profiles say theyre 6' or taller. More than half have shirtless pics with visible abs and well developed upper body muscles. And the other pics are very solid pics.

 

 

Well shit as an average ass dude I feel like I shouldn't even bother

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I did often wonder if women of okc/tinder also got flooded with fakes and bots

Quote

 

Quote

Anyone who likes tacos is incapable of logic.

Anyone who likes logic is incapable of tacos.

 

PSA: SaqPrets is an Estonian Dude

Steam: NippleBeardTM

Origin: Brand_New_iPwn

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Well, also consider the fact that most of the people there are currently single, otherwise they wouldn't be there. So you can take it as all normal guys have already been taken and only the jerk-ass beefcakes are left ;)

t3aGt.png

 

So I've noticed this thread's regulars all follow similar trends.

 

RPG is constantly dealing with psycho exes.

Muggi reminds us of the joys of polygamy.

Saq is totally oblivious to how much chicks dig him.

I strike out every other week.

Kalphite wages a war against the friend zone.

Randox pretty much stays rational.

Etc, etc

 

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tbh I've become less worried about dating after browsing okcupid for a while this morning
 
Most peeps I find I like (pictures, bio, etc) are in Raleigh or surrounding area. Not only is the Raleigh pool much larger, it's much more attractive (personality and looks lol). it's probably best I hold off until I move to the area until I graduate. I'll still lurk but I'll hold expending much effort until then.
 
Anyway by then I should be rich from my game :shades:. (Lol seriously if my game is successful I'm so gonna go traveling. My dream is to travel to all continents, so beat having travel pictures of ANTARCTICA [bleep]es).

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Not if I beat you to it first. I'm only missing South America and Antarctica :D

t3aGt.png

 

So I've noticed this thread's regulars all follow similar trends.

 

RPG is constantly dealing with psycho exes.

Muggi reminds us of the joys of polygamy.

Saq is totally oblivious to how much chicks dig him.

I strike out every other week.

Kalphite wages a war against the friend zone.

Randox pretty much stays rational.

Etc, etc

 

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yeah but I don't come from a bougie family sry fam (I'm joking, I just don't know why you're trying to one up me lol).

 

The cost between any other continent vs Antarctica is ... very high. Very, very high. Even if my game is not financially successful when it's done in 1.5-2 years, I'll still get a good job at something like SAS Institute or Epic or whatever. Considering how frugal I live, I'd be able to save to visit all these places (Antartica included) with the income these jobs provide within a couple years.

 

Speaking of SAS, I'm pretty sure my advisor at FTCC knows people at SAS so he'd be able to help me out there which is... great. SAS is looks like a lovely company to work for if you like work-life balance.

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Antarctica 10-day tours and so can be had from ~4000 bucks, if you can get yourself to Ushuaia.

t3aGt.png

 

So I've noticed this thread's regulars all follow similar trends.

 

RPG is constantly dealing with psycho exes.

Muggi reminds us of the joys of polygamy.

Saq is totally oblivious to how much chicks dig him.

I strike out every other week.

Kalphite wages a war against the friend zone.

Randox pretty much stays rational.

Etc, etc

 

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I hope hell exists and it's reserved for people who stand others up

 

I'm more reliable than a [bleep]ing clock why can't others be.

 

that's it for tonight

 

...

 

I deleted  the extra rude bits. I tend to get egotistical when I get mad. I apologize.

Edited by Veiva

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think of it this way: that person proved quickly and conveniently they aren't worth your time and attention. Often times it takes a lot longer to figure that out :)

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"It's not a rest for me, it's a rest for the weights." - Dom Mazzetti

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he said he was going to come when I messaged him earlier

 

w/e people suck

 

@obfuscator yeah I know.

 

Working in retail and being more social just made me realize even your seemingly average nice person is in all likelihood an asshat though which is a bit ... depressing.

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Shit happens. Might be a reason that someone flaked. Everybody is super busy these days. And people cannot be relied on all the time anymore.

I know I am as guilty about standing up to others as most people, but at least I try to be everywhere and if I can't I'll at least let people know. Even if it's after the fact.

 

 

*

 

A young vet (as in veterinary) seems to be flirting with me. Think she was here once last year, I didn't even recognize her at once, but she remembered me and asked about how my trip to the States and on was...

Even my mum, who is here working with me in this farm mentioned she smiled very brightly and laughed to nearly everything I said. The vet even wondered how long I'd be here and made sure to mention when she'd be working

 

Oh, and she pretty.

Dang it, if I'd really lived here and she'd live closer than ~100 km's (2-hour trip over mountains) away...

t3aGt.png

 

So I've noticed this thread's regulars all follow similar trends.

 

RPG is constantly dealing with psycho exes.

Muggi reminds us of the joys of polygamy.

Saq is totally oblivious to how much chicks dig him.

I strike out every other week.

Kalphite wages a war against the friend zone.

Randox pretty much stays rational.

Etc, etc

 

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btw if I hear "you're [cute / funny / sweet / nice / good] but..." one more time

 

apparently none of those attributes mean anything

 

none of them

 

Socialization and dating has made me cynical of people.

Edited by Veiva

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btw if I hear "you're [cute / funny / sweet / nice / good] but..." one more time

 

apparently none of those attributes mean anything

 

none of them

 

Socialization and dating has made me cynical of people.

 

What do you think you're doing wrong?

 

I'm trying to figure that out but I honestly don't know. One of my friends said I'm too positive and talkative in a way that's possibly off-putting but he was probably being an ass.

 

It may not come across online but in person I'm genuinely nice and polite; I listen to people and can recall most things they've said later*; I'm a very positive person and am mindful; I can keep a conversation going and as it turns out often have to carry it (that may be a sign?). I think I'm reasonably funny and witty. I'm think I'm physically attractive (I'd bang myself [not literally] but I may be being narcissistic or egotistical lol), at least above average. I also respond reasonably promptly to texts/messages within a reasonable time frame... (That may be another problem?) But I do that with friends, work, school, or anything. (Because I'm literally carrying a magical device which lets me know when I get an email text or other message instantly and reminds me later if I don't read it right away :|).

 

I try and replay dates I've been on and I don't see where I personally did anything off-putting, but things sizzled usually whenever I tried to set up a second or third date (usually they ghost me or go "you're an X guy but...").

 

Is it it a bit weird to have been on over a dozen dates with different peeps but no one finds me attractive? Then again on the dates I went on I only fell for one person... It should be obvious but I'm new to this and I genuinely don't know lol.

 

There's exceptional cases to my general personality I described, such as when I'm having a break (re: mental illness), or I forget to take my medication (...like the last few days which is probably why I've been overly dramatic lol), But I've never gone on a date, or otherwise talked to people I was dating, when that happens. So I think that's irrelevant.

 

*: Aside: I found out some (a lot of?) people tell white lies and/or exaggerate over time and it's slightly disappointing (not sure if that's the right word?).

 

If anything sounds like an excuse, it's not supposed to be, it's just my thought process. Feel free to correct me or inform me. :P My sister, for example, always blames everyone else for her problems but as an outsider it's easy to see she's the cause of most of her troubles. So I'm trying to figure out where I'm making the mistakes, because I don't think it's likely to be everyone else. That's not likely at all.

 

it does mean something, that they aren't attracted to you. it just doesn't mean what they're saying :)

I know. Doesn't change the fact that it's still annoying.

 

...

 

It may get drowned in in the above post but I apologize for being overly dramatic, I've forgotten to take my medication the last few days. RIP.

 

...

 

Feedback on pictures? Some of these I've posted, some I haven't.

 

 

 

 

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1. Raleigh

 

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2. @ my school, FTCC

 

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3. Feedback on this one has been mixed IRL. Some say it's overly... effeminate/gay. It's like a love/hate. Some love it, some hate it. It's a mixed bag.

 

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4. Posted this one earlier. Pretty recent, at World of Beer.

 

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5. Also at World of Beer. That's a Stranger Things shirt. I like the first one personally.

 

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6. Mixed feedback on this one. TBH I think it's great but I'll probably put it at the end.

 

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7. Local privately-owned coffee place. I like it.

 

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8. I love this one. Also at FTCC. (Actually right next to #2 lol).

 

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9. I personally like/hate this one.

 

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10. This one may make me look gay?

 

 

Edited by Veiva

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