Oh well close enough

 

 

 

Granted but then you realize none of the speechs had anything to do with what you were doing.

 

 

 

I wish someone would feed me while i was getting eaten by zombies.

Granted, but as they go to give you a bite, they too get eaten.

 

 

 

 

 

I wish I had the best underground bunker ever built.

you evil person!

 

 

 

Granted but then it caves in on you and i eat you because the zombies turned me into a zombie.

 

 

 

I wish i had a pet ninja monkey that would do my bidding.

Granted, but, because you're a zombie, you eat its brains and turn it into a zombie as well and then I shoot both your heads off.

 

 

 

 

 

I wish the zombie apocalypse would go ahead and happen already so that we could get it over with.

Granted but i got my zombie ninja monkey to keep you alive so i could toture you becuause i am the zombie overlord.

 

 

 

I wish i pwned even more then I do now.( I know its hard)

Granted, but then Chuck Norris notices your pwnageness and kills you just to show off.

 

 

 

 

 

I wish I were zombie-resistant.

Granted, but the zombies notice how resistant you are to them so they ask their buddy Bigfoot to beat the crap out of you. Which he does.

 

 

 

I wish I had 2 AA batteries.

Granted, but the are dead.

 

 

 

I wish TPUM gets 1 million dollars.

Granted, in fact, it was granted SO hard that I get 200 million dollars, but the next day I stub my toe and it kinda hurts for a few minutes.

 

 

 

I wish David had never gone to the dentist.

Granted he killed you insted and I take all your money.

 

 

 

I wish humans didn't have to sleep.

Granted but you just die of lack of sleep. End.

 

 

 

I wish for another 3 wishes.

Granted but they all have to involve you dieing somehow.

 

 

 

I wish for a death note.

Granted, it's an e minor, you die.

 

 

 

I wish mudkipz didnt exist.

Granted, Swamperts are now all the rage.

 

 

 

I wish of infinite wishes. (Should be an easy response.)

You wished of them, but not for them so you don't get anymore wishes.

 

 

 

I wish for 375 cats.

Granted but they are only trained to use you as a bathroom and then to use your skin to bury it.

 

 

 

I wish for something good.

Granted, you get a pitcher of milk with gummy bears inside.

 

 

 

I wish TPUM would get something good.

Granted, TPUM gets a perfectly usable nail. In the eye.

 

 

 

I wish for nothing.

Granted. You get absolutely nothing for the rest of your life, including water, and die of dehydration.

 

 

 

I wishschool wasn't so lame.

Granted but to spice it up they have random explosions and poison your food and drinks. You die from getting shot by a wanna-be-gangster.

 

 

 

I wish I didn't have a history and Bio final today.

Granted, but you don't have it because you ended up missing it thus getting a 0.

 

 

 

I wish that the summer was here already.

banned for not letting me be 300th page post

I think that was wrong topic :P

 

 

 

I wish my wish was granted.

Granted, but because you didn't have a wish that you wished to have granted, you get attacked by zombies.

 

 

 

I wish I knew everything there was to know about computers.

Granted, but the same day you gain all that knowledge, aliens come to earth and give us the technology that makes computers obsolete.

 

 

 

I wish this was the 300th page.