Messing with Telemarketers

[flamestrike]

Well i did this unintentionally but afterwards i relized what i did and kinda laughed it off. So it was like 4:24 pm and i got hungry and decided to make some toast, cause toast is amazing. Well i for one love my toast like extra extra burnt(i dont know why but it taste amazing). So while waiting my phone rings and i awnser, and its a telemarketer, Im waiting for my toast so i might as well play along. Are you 18? Yes! do you know of the scam that the post offices are pulling? No! Then the guys get excited, but soemthing goes wrong. My toast is reallllllly burnt and my firealarm goes off, so i can hardly hear the guy on the phone cause its ringing so loud, hes like are you okay? and im like OH NO MY HOUSE IS ON FIRE and i hang up and run to my toast. I relized what i did and kinda laughed about, sitting here eating my delicious toast i ask, any pranks you pulled on telemartketers?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

(P.S. there is something wrong with my brain and i can not ever, and i mean ever spell awnser or relized right. so dont make fun of my spelling :-()

[krunkthemonk]

It's quite odd cause my sister did something similar the other day. They asked if anyone between 18 and 25 lived in our house. She put our dog on the phone. Yet I'm afraid that won't stop them from calling again.

[weezcake]

You can just put your number on the national do not call list. You only get charity telemarketer calls that way. :x

[Stuart_G]

You could try a bit of Lil' Jon, Dave Chappelle style...

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"Hello, are you 18 years of age?"

 

 

 

"Huh-what!?"

 

 

 

"Are you 18 years of age?"

 

 

 

"Huh-what!?"

 

 

 

"Are you 18 years of age!?"

 

 

 

"Uh-Yeaaah!!"

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Never tried this myself, but ive always wanted to. Not much fun when theres only yourself there with no one around to see it :roll:

[indy500fan]

im on the no call list, and i kinda miss it. it was always fun to screw around with them.

[ClassicNerd]

You could try a bit of Lil' Jon, Dave Chappelle style...

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"Hello, are you 18 years of age?"

 

 

 

"Huh-what!?"

 

 

 

"Are you 18 years of age?"

 

 

 

"Huh-what!?"

 

 

 

"Are you 18 years of age!?"

 

 

 

"Uh-Yeaaah!!"

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Never tried this myself, but ive always wanted to. Not much fun when theres only yourself there with no one around to see it :roll:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Lmao :lol:

[misterxman]

Start speaking another language until they give up.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"Quoi?"

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"No hablo ingles"

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"Me llamo es Brian"

[LP]

if u get the sales person one...

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

stay on the phone and keep adking questions..

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

reapeating the same ones sometime..

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

and at the end.. after like 30-40min of talking be like no thanks.. im gunna go.

[Zibl]

You can just put your number on the national do not call list. You only get charity telemarketer calls that way. :x

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

That thing is a lifesavor. No more annoying calls. And if I do get a call, I get paid for it (because legally they aren't supposed to call you if your name is on that list). Can I get a w00t w00t?

[Phil]

OH NO MY HOUSE IS ON FIRE

 

 

 

Hahaha, that actually made me laugh out loud :P

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Telemarketing people are always a laugh though. It's weird.

[Adam007]

My family's on the list but we still get calls. Just a lot less.

 

 

 

I found this list. Actually has a lot of ones I haven't heard before on the usual lists.

 

 

 

Telemarketer Pranks

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

If they want to loan you money, tell them you just filed for bankruptcy and you could sure use some money.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

If they start out with, "How are you today?" say, "Why do you want to know?" Alternately, you can tell them, "I'm so glad you asked, because no one these days seems to care, and I have all these problems; my arthritis is acting up, my eyelashes are sore, my dog just died..."

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

If they say they're John Doe from XYZ Company, ask them to spell their name. Then ask them to spell the company name. Then ask them where it is located. Continue asking them personal questions or questions about their company for as long as necessary.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

This works great if you are male:

 

 

 

Telemarketer: "Hi, my name is Judy and I'm with XYZ Company..." You: Wait for a second and with a real husky voice ask, "What are you wearing?"

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Cry out in surprise, "Judy! Is that you? Oh my God! Judy, how have you been?" Hopefully, this will give Judy a few brief moments of terror as she tries to figure out where she could know you from.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Say "No", over and over. Be sure to vary the sound of each one, and keep a rhythmic tempo, even as they are trying to speak. This is most fun if you can do it until they hang up.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

If MCI calls trying to get you to sign up for the Family and Friends Plan, reply, in as SINISTER a voice as you can, "I don't have any friends...would you be my friend?"

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

If the company cleans rugs, respond: "Can you get out blood? Can you get out GOAT blood? How about HUMAN blood?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

After the Telemarketer gives their spiel, ask him/her to marry you. When they get all flustered, tell them that you could not just give your credit card number to a complete stranger.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Tell the Telemarketer that you work for the same company, they often can't sell to employees.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Answer the phone. As soon as you realize it is a Telemarketer, set the receiver down, shout or scream, "Oh my God!!!" and then hang up.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Tell the Telemarketer you are busy at the moment and ask him/her if he/she will give you his/her HOME phone number so you can call him/her back. When the Telemarketer explains that telemarketers cannot give out their HOME numbers you say "I guess you don't want anyone bothering you at home, right?" The Telemarketer will agree and you say, "Now you know how I feel!" Hang up.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Ask them to repeat everything they say, several times.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Tell them it is dinner time, BUT ask if they would please hold. Place them on your speaker phone while you continue to eat at your leisure. Smack your food loudly and continue with your dinner conversation.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Tell the Telemarketer you are on "home incarceration" and ask if they could bring you some beer.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Ask them to fax the information to you, and make up a number.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Tell the Telemarketer, "Okay, I will listen to you. But I should probably tell you, I'm not wearing any clothes."

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Insist that the caller is really your buddy Leon, playing a joke.

 

 

 

"Come on Leon, cut it out! Seriously, Leon, how's your mom?"

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Tell them you are hard of hearing and that they need to speaker up...louder... louder...louder...

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Tell them to talk VERY SLOWLY, because you want to write down EVERY WORD.

[Triplets_KGB]

Wow, thank god I live in New Zealand... no telemarketers here :P

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

It would be awesome to get a call every now and then.

[Mr_Putter]

My family's on the list but we still get calls. Just a lot less.

 

 

 

I found this list. Actually has a lot of ones I haven't heard before on the usual lists.

 

 

 

Cry out in surprise, "Judy! Is that you? Oh my God! Judy, how have you been?" Hopefully, this will give Judy a few brief moments of terror as she tries to figure out where she could know you from.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Lol, that's a good one. Because then as they try to figure it out, and they can't, you can be like "OMG, I can't believe you don't know the sound of my voice!!! I'm never talking to you again EVAR!!! Then hang up, and they will be all confused and they won't know who won't ever talk to them again.

[Necromancer_Magic]

LOL, these people called johovaness witnesnes (or however u spell it)

 

 

 

anyway @ my house we have a MASSIVE drive way about 800m long!

 

 

 

anyway we have a sign saying "NO CARS" so they get out of their cars and walk all the way down my driveway when they get to my door their like

 

 

 

"would u be intedrested in converting"

 

 

 

and i'm like

 

 

 

"Tell me more"

 

 

 

so they are explaining all this stuff

 

 

 

and i ask them if they want a drink (they walk in)

 

 

 

i turn around acting all surpised

 

 

 

"OOOO who invited u in then!"

 

 

 

and the r sooo lost for words!

 

 

 

and i'm like leave!

 

 

 

when they're about 50m away i turn the sprinkers on THE GET TOTALY SOAKED!!!!!

 

 

 

then their in their best clothes being soaked runn up the rest 700m of our muddy driveway!!!

 

 

 

lol lol lol lol lol lol lol lol

[Adam007]

Lol necro, that's just plain mean, but probably was twistedly funny to watch.

 

 

 

I haven't ever gotten any religious people trying to convert or anything at the door, but we do get people who want to sell stuff or people asking for donations.

 

 

 

Darn house-marketers. Even worse than tele-marketers IMO.

[AThousandLies]

Courtesy of Bash.org ...

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

#166427 +(621)- [X]

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

<@Infinik> Hehe.

 

 

 

<@Infinik> I just took a call for the Samaritans

 

 

 

<@Infinik> Our phone numbers are one number apart

 

 

 

<@Infinik> So this guy was talking to me about some charity [cabbage]

 

 

 

<@Infinik> And I interrupted him

 

 

 

<@Infinik> "Would you excuse me for a moment?" "Sure." "HEY JULIO! I SAID DON'T LET THE JEWISH KIDS IN WITH THE HUMAN KIDS YOU SON OF A [bleep]!"

 

 

 

<@Infinik> He hung up :)

[runesmithie]

Lol necro, that's just plain mean, but probably was twistedly funny to watch.

 

 

 

I haven't ever gotten any religious people trying to convert or anything at the door, but we do get people who want to sell stuff or people asking for donations.

 

 

 

Darn house-marketers. Even worse than tele-marketers IMO.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

That really was quite mean =\

[Scruffy5389]

Courtesy of Bash.org ...

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

#166427 +(621)- [X]

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

<@Infinik> Hehe.

 

 

 

<@Infinik> I just took a call for the Samaritans

 

 

 

<@Infinik> Our phone numbers are one number apart

 

 

 

<@Infinik> So this guy was talking to me about some charity cabbage

 

 

 

<@Infinik> And I interrupted him

 

 

 

<@Infinik> "Would you excuse me for a moment?" "Sure." "HEY JULIO! I SAID DON'T LET THE JEWISH KIDS IN WITH THE HUMAN KIDS YOU SON OF A wonderful person!"

 

 

 

<@Infinik> He hung up :)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

That's awesome.... :lol:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

My trick with telelmarketers is just to assume that the person talking is a recording. "How do I know this is not a recorded message?"

[Boogityboo04]

A typical conversation for me is:

 

 

 

*me* hello?

 

 

 

*Telemarketer* Hello I'm john from XYZ Inc. we want to sell you some crap

 

 

 

*me* Hang on i have someone on the other line, one minute

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Then i switch lines and leave the phone off the hook and let them sit

[DaN]

I used to redirect them to a sex hotline (expensive for them) but unfortunatly now they get a message saying "your call is being redirected" whenever I redirect a call :x

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

now I use skype to redirect them to a random overseas company.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

being "man in the middle" is the best way to redirect a call since you can monitor the conversation plus they dont know theyve been redirected.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I got a phone line for the purpose of reciving telemarketers my answering machine when im away goes "Hello?!" *start recording without any beep*

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

They all leave messages "Hi this is Tracy from noob inc can you please take a quick survey for us? Hello.... Hello....? *hangs up*"

[kirbybeam]

DaN that is awesome, especially if you add the sound of fumbling with the phone before saying "hello". wow, I wanna try that! if only some telemarketers would call me...

[knives669]

Lol. I LOVE messing with telemarketers! One time, they called while my brother, his friend, and I were in our pool in our backyard. I had the cordless phone out there with us and when I answered, my brother and his friend were splashing and making alot of noise, so they said, "Hello?" a few times. I spoke really loud and frantic saying, "Who is this?!" When they told me their name, they asked if they were speaking to the adult in the house and I screamed "OH MY GOD!" they said, "Are you alright, ma'am?" I said, "Yeah! I'm fine... But... Billy... Oh my god... Billy! We thought it would be fun to tie concrete blocks to Billy's feet and push him in the lake! We thought we would just scare him a little..." and my brother's friend yelled loud enough for the telemarketer to hear, "OH GOD! How come we didn't know concrete would SINK?!" Just then, my brother started playing along and splashing around, yelling, "HELP! HELP ME!" The telemarketer was speechless... :lol: Then, my brother stopped splashing and everything was silent, until my brother's friend said to me, "Go get a shovel. Hurry!" and the telemarketer hung up. :lol:

[beny_2b]

The worst are the ones where people come to your house and ask for some catalogue back you know you threw away as soon as it arrived so Im usually like "Hmmm can you describe it to me" this goes on for a few minutes and then I usually turn round and say "Oh yes I remember now I threw it out 2 weeks back"

[Mercifull]

Courtesy of Bash.org ...

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

#166427 +(621)- [X]

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

<@Infinik> Hehe.

 

 

 

<@Infinik> I just took a call for the Samaritans

 

 

 

<@Infinik> Our phone numbers are one number apart

 

 

 

<@Infinik> So this guy was talking to me about some charity cabbage

 

 

 

<@Infinik> And I interrupted him

 

 

 

<@Infinik> "Would you excuse me for a moment?" "Sure." "HEY JULIO! I SAID DON'T LET THE JEWISH KIDS IN WITH THE HUMAN KIDS YOU SON OF A wonderful person!"

 

 

 

<@Infinik> He hung up :)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Of course the Samaritans number is 08457 90 90 90. And unless this guy has an 0845 number direct to his house, very unlikely, you woudlnt be one number out and get his number. He's BSing.

[Adam007]

Lol. I LOVE messing with telemarketers! One time, they called while my brother, his friend, and I were in our pool in our backyard. I had the cordless phone out there with us and when I answered, my brother and his friend were splashing and making alot of noise, so they said, "Hello?" a few times. I spoke really loud and frantic saying, "Who is this?!" When they told me their name, they asked if they were speaking to the adult in the house and I screamed "OH MY GOD!" they said, "Are you alright, ma'am?" I said, "Yeah! I'm fine... But... Billy... Oh my god... Billy! We thought it would be fun to tie concrete blocks to Billy's feet and push him in the lake! We thought we would just scare him a little..." and my brother's friend yelled loud enough for the telemarketer to hear, "OH GOD! How come we didn't know concrete would SINK?!" Just then, my brother started playing along and splashing around, yelling, "HELP! HELP ME!" The telemarketer was speechless... :lol: Then, my brother stopped splashing and everything was silent, until my brother's friend said to me, "Go get a shovel. Hurry!" and the telemarketer hung up. :lol:

 

 

 

I'd imagine the telemarketer could tell that you weren't serious. They're probably used to dumb things like that. Sounds like you guys had fun with it at least..