I start school again tomorrow... Sophomore ftw?

 

 

 

Anyway, this is the same girl I've posted about every time I've posted here.

 

 

 

She broke up with me in May, because her parents read some text I sent her or something... And I was flirting with one of my friends (yes a female) and I found out she liked me, I didn't like her; but anyway I asked out my ex again she said yes... But I broke up with her so I could try and sort this thing out with my friend... Hoping not to hurt my friend I hurt the girl that I love...

 

 

 

Anyway... I want to get back together with my ex, and she said she still thinks something is there... Problem is I think she really doesn't like me at the moment, her friends and family hate me... What do I do?

 

 

 

And how do I go back to school with her? I don't want her to think that I want to be "just friends"...

 

 

 

Ugh... *facepalm*

 

 

 

Help me please? :)

 

 

 

What exactly have you done to get her family AND friends to both hate you?

 

Family, was from the texts they read, I'm assuming, and friends, was because he's broken up with her several times, and I'm assuming she was hurt from that, and friends don't like seeing their friends hurt.

Actually her friends hated me because I was her first boyfriend, she would skip spending all her free time with her friends to spend some of it with me...

 

 

 

Her friends say I treated her like a piece of meat... and this is all after our first breakup... and Bekah actually started to believe it... It disgusts me that her friends fill her head with this "propaganda" against me... when I didn't even do anything wrong...

 

 

 

Her family hated me because of the text/my religion or lack thereof. Basically since she broke up with me her parents have been monitoring her Myspace/Facebook, phone, email etc etc... so I don't have any contact with her... Maybe it's to get over me or whatever; but doesn't it seem illogical to force someone to stop caring about their significant other?

 

 

 

All my friends know I love her... Like thinking about her makes my heart physically ache... I just know I can't move on, because I'd be lying if I told anyone else I loved them more than anything or whatever... and it would damn near kill me to see her walking the halls at school with some other guy.

 

 

 

Ugh... Getting emotional...

Actually her friends hated me because I was her first boyfriend, she would skip spending all her free time with her friends to spend some of it with me...

 

 

 

Her friends say I treated her like a piece of meat... and this is all after our first breakup... and Bekah actually started to believe it... It disgusts me that her friends fill her head with this "propaganda" against me... when I didn't even do anything wrong...

 

 

 

Her family hated me because of the text/my religion or lack thereof. Basically since she broke up with me her parents have been monitoring her Myspace/Facebook, phone, email etc etc... so I don't have any contact with her... Maybe it's to get over me or whatever; but doesn't it seem illogical to force someone to stop caring about their significant other?

 

 

 

All my friends know I love her... Like thinking about her makes my heart physically ache... I just know I can't move on, because I'd be lying if I told anyone else I loved them more than anything or whatever... and it would damn near kill me to see her walking the halls at school with some other guy.

 

 

 

Ugh... Getting emotional...

 

Sounds like you need try and get her friends' approval. If they like you (as in think you are a pretty cool guy, who kills aliens and doesn't afraid of anything) then you will only have to worry about the family. (Have they met you before? Either way you should think of things you could do for them so they will think "Hey, maybe we were too harsh on you, maybe you might be good enough for our daughter.")

 

 

 

On an unrelated note, how old are you? I thought you were 14, but on XBL you sounded 18.

Her parents used to love me... But now its not that great...

 

 

 

I just hope we have the same chemistry we had before school ended. :ohnoes:

 

 

 

And yes... I'm 14. :P

For some reason I've always thought of you as a girl Knotch and I thought you were bi (judging by your posts in this thread) :lol:

 

 

 

But then I checked your real life picture... anyways, back on topic. To be honest, you've sort of confused me so I will just move along now.

Her parents used to love me... But now its not that great...

 

 

 

I just hope we have the same chemistry we had before school ended. :ohnoes:

 

 

 

And yes... I'm 14. :P

 

Parents are tricky ones, but it might be because they don't want her to get hurt, and that's something you can't force them to trust you with. Just try with her friends for now.

 

 

 

Your voice is deeper than mine and I'm 17.

@Wongtong... :shock:

 

 

 

@Mage Man... Whaaaaaaaaaaat? You're an aussie who's bad at Halo :P

 

 

 

Ah. Her friends were saying she doesn't want to talk to me, but I asked her after she said she'd talk to me tomorrow. so... :thumbup: =D> :thumbsup: :ohnoes:

@Wongtong... :shock:

 

 

 

@Mage Man... Whaaaaaaaaaaat? You're an aussie who's bad at Halo :P

 

 

 

Ah. Her friends were saying she doesn't want to talk to me, but I asked her after she said she'd talk to me tomorrow. so... :thumbup: =D> :thumbsup: :ohnoes:

 

I barely play Halo anymore, and you're a Brigadier while I'm still a Lieutenant.

 

 

 

Also, good luck with tomorrow. Maybe you should mention to her about trying to hang out with her while she hangs with her friends so they they can see that you're a cool guy, not some jerk taking her away.

[hide=]I want to quote everyone above, but instead I'll just make a general comment.

 

 

 

First of all, sweet haircut, I did the exact same thing! (27" of hair to mowhawk)

 

 

 

Second: Gratz to the one on their first date, sounds like it went well, I wish you luck in the future :D

 

 

 

Third: My first date was pretty good, although awkward. We doubled with a couple that had already been going out 5 months, the guy being a good friend of mine and my date a good friend of my my friend's girl. Yes that made sense. All we did was hang out at the park though, a little on the boring side to be honest. Probably why we didn't work out like at all :-#

 

 

 

Fourthly: On a movie date, there's no need to make out at all. In fact I hate when girls make moves on me while I'm in the theatre. I paid 10$ friggin' dollars to see this film, I'm gonna see it!

 

...As for the "Yawn" move, I found that it works great minus the yawn. Seriously, just skip all the fake cover up stuff and just put your god damn arm around the poor women. It works just fine.

 

 

 

Fifthly: i can tell just by the past few posts that IamDan is a great flirt (assuming he takes his own advice). He's right, playing random games with girls is a great way to have fun, no matter how stupid it seems.

 

 

 

Sixthly: Lenticular, I find it creepy that you are studying elementary school girls. :lol:

 

but you have a point, the way they act is pretty interesting and actually COULD pertain to relationships. Do report to us with any findings ;)[/hide]

 

I would rock a mohawk if it actually matched my personality in some way. Also I'm tall enough as it is.

 

 

 

My first date I went to the movies with someone I had met at a party a few days before. I'm glad the theatre was mostly empty, cause we were talking half the time (mostly about the movie). Then we walked through the mall since we didn't have anything better to do. It was a lot of fun.

 

 

 

As for the hooking up during a movie, I don't why you should rule it out. As long as I have fun and no one gets hurt, I don't really care what I do.

 

 

 

Playing random games with ANYONE is fun. It's pretty much all me and my friends do. Also, I'm really fidgety, so if I'm with a girl, I end up playing with something that's around, not excluding the girl (Not meant in a sexual manner). Also, who cares if you look stupid? As long as I'm having fun, I don't care what other people think of me. Besides, if you show a girl you're willing to look stupid to make her laugh, that shows how confident you are and what she means to you.

I'm pretty confused. Could namely use a hand from Dan, but I just need advice on this one.

 

 

 

[hide=This is a friggin novel.]So, back to school, looking my usual good-looking stuff, doing pretty good although I haven't gotten numbers or anything, just being thrown off by school you know?

 

 

 

Anyways, three girls that I've known, [cabbage], since middle school. They know I was such a little nerd back then. And I've pissed off every one of them, and two of them I went out with once (don't wanna talk about it, I pretend a lot of my former life didn't happen). Well, the past couple days (well, namely today, I have 2nd period with all three of them, 3rd with one, and I hang out with another one in the parking lot after school waiting to find a ride), I've been getting ridiculous IOIs from ALL THREE OF THEM. I mean, mad crazy ones that I would act on as fast as I could if I wasn't so damn confused about it. One, we'll call her K, is a tall (6"5 or something, my forehead just about reaches her nose) athletic girl, only she's very good looking and I like that. She's funny too, and I know she hasn't had a boyfriend in a long time because of issues she had with a guy in 8th grade. Just have her in history, but she sits next to me, and every time I talk to her she's sitting there giggling, playing with her hair, and looking at my lips. She's also checked me out a couple of times.

 

 

 

Other girl, H, is a cheerleader and kind of ditzy, although she's probably the only one of the cheerleaders I'd date. She's looking very good since this summer, and she's a perfect height for me. I know she's had a crush on me about every year since 7th grade, I was just an idiot and didn't know how to really act fully on it. She sits behind me in history and flirted with me the whole time in class today. She tried to pick up my desk with her feet, kept touching me, just general flirtatious stuff. I mean, I responded, I picked up her desk when the teacher was out and nearly tilted her out of it :lol: She's not very heavy. She's the one I talk to in the parking lot.

 

 

 

Then, another girl, call her J, is the one I have 2nd and 3rd period with. We've had an interesting relationship in the past. She's one of the best-looking girls in the school, and her family's very wealthy (her dad is a leader in the Lubbock branch of the Lions Club!), but they're a ranching family, and she's incredibly down-to-earth. The height difference bugs me, because she's about 5"1 (I'm almost 6"1, shouldn't be long!). Anyways, dunno why I'm putting all these details, part of what my speech teacher was saying about details today I guess (more details lead people to imagining things and people easier, which generally is good). So, our history teacher is a real ranching man, so he let all the girls go first while all us guys waited (pissed off a lotta guys with CA the next period), but J was waiting for me and demanded I walk her to class. Typical IOI behavior followed, I was kinda cocky-funny about the fact that she was wearing shoes that probably boosted her 4 inches and - now, this part was tricky, but I was intrigued - she still probably couldn't kiss me. I wasn't expecting the response, something along the lines of "Well, I guess I'll have to teach you to start leaning down!" Now that was interesting.

 

 

 

So, sorry for the novel. Really confused, although it helped me a helluva lot to write it all out and read through it. Helps organize my thoughts. Not gonna do anything until next week though, I made that policy the first day. Catches a girl too much by surprise to do that in the first week (indeed, it might be better to wait a couple weeks, but more pushy/desperate guys might start swarming). Maybe Pat Benatar will be able to give me some advice Thursday. Anyways. Thanks for reading, if you did.[/hide]

 

 

 

I would rock a mohawk if it actually matched my personality in some way. Also I'm tall enough as it is.

 

Do you like dinosaurs?

What's your question, Lent?

What do I doooooooooooooooooooooooooooo. Namely.

Are you afraid if you pick one the others will start spreading (true) rumors?

 

Also, stop saying namely.

DAMMIT I NAMELY LIKE THAT WORD.

 

 

 

But, no, I'm not really afraid of that because I don't care quite as much. I'm just confused on whether I should act on one of them. Or all three, although I really doubt that would work out well with these girls. Most girls at my school, really.

 

 

 

I don't know what I'm trying to get advice on. Just confused and writing it out really helped, at least.

DAMMIT I NAMELY LIKE THAT WORD.

 

 

 

But, no, I'm not really afraid of that because I don't care quite as much. I'm just confused on whether I should act on one of them. Or all three, although I really doubt that would work out well with these girls. Most girls at my school, really.

 

 

 

I don't know what I'm trying to get advice on. Just confused and writing it out really helped, at least.

 

 

 

My advice is to stop pursuing all three of them. I know a lot of you will hate this quote because it came from the bible but I find it to be very true. Paraphrasing: "Do not seek love if outside of a relationship and do not look to be released if in one." I find that the best women come along without you even looking.

DAMMIT I NAMELY LIKE THAT WORD.

 

 

 

But, no, I'm not really afraid of that because I don't care quite as much. I'm just confused on whether I should act on one of them. Or all three, although I really doubt that would work out well with these girls. Most girls at my school, really.

 

 

 

I don't know what I'm trying to get advice on. Just confused and writing it out really helped, at least.

 

 

 

You're confusion needs to be dealt with before you make a real move on any of them. Having 3 girls at once sounds good in theory, but really it just makes a big friggin' mess of your life. Ultimatly I think you'll have to pick one. It seems that you focus on height, and based on that alone, the better choice would probably be the ditsy cheerleader. But that's completely up to you.

Besides, if you show a girl you're willing to look stupid to make her laugh, that shows how confident you are and what she means to you.

 

Doing that will work against you, though it shouldn't matter in high school as long as you don't over do it. I knew a guy who was funny, smart, confident and really social in high school, but he never had any success with girls because he always made jokes about himself and he became the dancing monkey.

 

 

 

I'm pretty confused. Could namely use a hand from Dan, but I just need advice on this one.

 

 

 

[hide=This is a friggin novel.]So, back to school, looking my usual good-looking stuff, doing pretty good although I haven't gotten numbers or anything, just being thrown off by school you know?

 

 

 

Anyways, three girls that I've known, [cabbage], since middle school. They know I was such a little nerd back then. And I've pissed off every one of them, and two of them I went out with once (don't wanna talk about it, I pretend a lot of my former life didn't happen). Well, the past couple days (well, namely today, I have 2nd period with all three of them, 3rd with one, and I hang out with another one in the parking lot after school waiting to find a ride), I've been getting ridiculous IOIs from ALL THREE OF THEM. I mean, mad crazy ones that I would act on as fast as I could if I wasn't so damn confused about it. One, we'll call her K, is a tall (6"5 or something, my forehead just about reaches her nose) athletic girl, only she's very good looking and I like that. She's funny too, and I know she hasn't had a boyfriend in a long time because of issues she had with a guy in 8th grade. Just have her in history, but she sits next to me, and every time I talk to her she's sitting there giggling, playing with her hair, and looking at my lips. She's also checked me out a couple of times.

 

 

 

Other girl, H, is a cheerleader and kind of ditzy, although she's probably the only one of the cheerleaders I'd date. She's looking very good since this summer, and she's a perfect height for me. I know she's had a crush on me about every year since 7th grade, I was just an idiot and didn't know how to really act fully on it. She sits behind me in history and flirted with me the whole time in class today. She tried to pick up my desk with her feet, kept touching me, just general flirtatious stuff. I mean, I responded, I picked up her desk when the teacher was out and nearly tilted her out of it :lol: She's not very heavy. She's the one I talk to in the parking lot.

 

 

 

Then, another girl, call her J, is the one I have 2nd and 3rd period with. We've had an interesting relationship in the past. She's one of the best-looking girls in the school, and her family's very wealthy (her dad is a leader in the Lubbock branch of the Lions Club!), but they're a ranching family, and she's incredibly down-to-earth. The height difference bugs me, because she's about 5"1 (I'm almost 6"1, shouldn't be long!). Anyways, dunno why I'm putting all these details, part of what my speech teacher was saying about details today I guess (more details lead people to imagining things and people easier, which generally is good). So, our history teacher is a real ranching man, so he let all the girls go first while all us guys waited (pissed off a lotta guys with CA the next period), but J was waiting for me and demanded I walk her to class. Typical IOI behavior followed, I was kinda cocky-funny about the fact that she was wearing shoes that probably boosted her 4 inches and - now, this part was tricky, but I was intrigued - she still probably couldn't kiss me. I wasn't expecting the response, something along the lines of "Well, I guess I'll have to teach you to start leaning down!" Now that was interesting.

 

 

 

So, sorry for the novel. Really confused, although it helped me a helluva lot to write it all out and read through it. Helps organize my thoughts. Not gonna do anything until next week though, I made that policy the first day. Catches a girl too much by surprise to do that in the first week (indeed, it might be better to wait a couple weeks, but more pushy/desperate guys might start swarming). Maybe Pat Benatar will be able to give me some advice Thursday. Anyways. Thanks for reading, if you did.[/hide]

 

 

 

High school is filled with sexually exclusive relationships without the sex, at least until the higher grades so you can't have them all at once. Personally in that situation I would flirt with all 3, but build more comfort with K. She sounds like someone you could be close friends with, but might turn romantic later on. Maybe hook up with H if I could, I personally don't like relationships with ditzy girls, but if she's a cheerleader she can be a great pivot. J would be the girl I'd go after if I wanted a relationship.

.

Since then, things haven't really progressed much. She didn't even turn up one week, and I've been struggling to talk to her in the other times.

 

 

 

The main problem that's concerning me at the moment is our age difference. Originally, I only thought there was a one to one and a half age difference, but I've since learnt that she's actually 2 years behind me in schooling (I'm in Y11, she's Y9 - this is NZ schooling), and so she's probably around 2 years younger than me, possibly even slightly more. So I'm currently 15, soon to be 16, which means she's only 13, soon to be 14.

 

 

 

The age difference isn't that bad. I know a girl that when she was 12 went out with a 17 year old.

 

 

 

 

 

Now while she looks and acts older than she is, there's this niggling part somewhere in my brain that tells me I'm a freak trying to get off with someone too young for me. What's more, a few days ago, a conversation arose amongst a few of my friends about "what year level would you go out with?". When one of my friends asked another, "would you go out with a Y9?", the reply was "Hell no", and when others were asked, the replies were pretty much the same. While I thankfully wasn't personally asked, hearing that conversation didn't exactly build my confidence.

 

 

 

You shouldn't feel like a freak trying to go for someone younger than you. The girl I'm with is a year (well, 7 months, but we're in different years of college) younger than me, and she doesn't feel uncomfortable with it, and I think that's to do with the whole 'Women like to date older guys'.

 

 

 

So now, my main question is do I bother trying to form a relationship with her? As I see it, these are my main options:

 

1. Forget about her; there are 'plenty more fish in the sea'.

 

2. Leave her alone for awhile, and try again next year (or later). There's not many weeks left in the badminton season, before there's about a 5 month break.

 

3. Keep trying to get to know her in the remaining few weeks (4/5 by my reckoning), and hope that things will develop so I can get a contact detail of sorts.

 

 

 

You should always try to form a relationship with someone you like. It may not turn into a serious relationship, but it's always good to have a new friend.

 

1. Dont forget about her.

 

2. While you should never rush things, if you aren't going to see her again for a while, perhaps it's better to get things moving.

 

3. Keep trying. Don't feel uncomfortable asking for a phone number or whatever, if you're trying to show the girl how you feel, confidence is key.

 

 

 

My thoughts on each:

 

1. While this is the easiest option, I don't really want to go this route unless I really have to. I go to a single-sex school, and don't really have that much of a social life outside of school, so I hardly have any other girls in my life really. (I don't even have a sister.) She is constantly on my mind, and I would find letting her go difficult.

 

2. This I feel is the option most likely to happen. I plan to come back next year, but for all I know, she isn't, and I may never see her again. However, if she does, we will both be older, and so the age difference between us will be a smaller proportion of our ages. Then again, she may have lost any interest she has in me, and may have a new boyfriend. Also, I don't like the prospect of not seeing her for 5 months, considering how much I think about her.

 

3. This for me would be the best option, but I think it's the least likely to happen. The last 6 weeks I have been attempting this, but all I've really managed is 2 short conversations, and a few passing remarks. The problem I feel is that we're both very shy people, and because we both like each other (I'm hoping so due to the IOI's she's given me), there's this huge awkwardness between each other. I try to be the confident and assertive one, but it's hard when her answers are so brief, and so I end up almost talking on my own. (And I don't want to give the impression I only like to talk about myself.)

 

 

 

1. While it might be a bit early, you should still tell her how you feel. Even if she is shy. The worst that can happen is that she thinks you're being cute.

 

2. Waiting a year will not help, the difference between knowing you and how much she's talked to you means that she will probably lose any interest she has in you.

 

3. If she is only giving you short answers then you can see she is shy. Try to make her feel more comfortable around you, then she'll feel less shy, since she'll know you better.

 

 

 

Don't feel uncomfortable talking to her when around adults. If you just talk to her normally with people around she might feel more comfortable.

I'm having more or less the exact same problem as Mattie. I'm 15, soon to be 16, and this 8th grader, 13, soon to be 14, likes me. Well, actually there's 2 that like me. But thats another issue I'll ask later. Anyway, I'm feeling like a child molester even talking to these girls. And, I really don't know what my parents will say. They'll probably just pick at me, but I'm not sure.

 

 

 

I live in the US, so people tend to look down on relationships like this. I really don't care what the community thinks, I'm just saying. So, should I feel weird or like a freak talking to these girls? Also, what should I tell my parents? And friends? Advice?

 

 

 

The age difference isn't that bad. I know a girl that when she was 12 went out with a 17 year old.

 

 

You think thats bad? I've seen 13 year olds with men well over 20, or in one of my ex's cases, 15 and 28. He was almost old enough to be her dad. :|

 

 

 

The age difference isn't that bad. I know a girl that when she was 12 went out with a 17 year old.

 

 

You think thats bad? I've seen 13 year olds with men well over 20, or in one of my ex's cases, 15 and 28. He was almost old enough to be her dad. :|

 

 

 

I didn't say it was bad. There are a lot of people in relationships like that, I was just giving the biggest age gap I could remember from my school.

 

 

 

The age difference isn't that bad. I know a girl that when she was 12 went out with a 17 year old.

 

 

You think thats bad? I've seen 13 year olds with men well over 20, or in one of my ex's cases, 15 and 28. He was almost old enough to be her dad. :|

 

I was on the jury of a statutory rape case over the summer and the girl was 15 and the man was 28. He got 28-32 years in prision.

lol

lol

 

 

 

 

 

That doesen't really help the discussion now does it.