"I want a girlfriend/boyfriend", and other such relationship advice

[Joes_So_Cool]

If a girl tells you to text/call her, do it soon, before she gets bored with waiting and finds a new guy to take her out. *personal experience.

[Romy]

I can't believe I blew it with the "new" girl. It's been like 2 weeks, and I've seen her once, and that was when I was with my ex. [bleep]in' stupid. Won't be making that mistake again, I tell you what. [This is the "kicking myself" stage of the failure]. I need to see her again. Gotta throw a party somewhere. somehow...

 

If you want to test the waters you could text her something like 'hey, are we fighting? and more importantly am i winning?'

 

I prefer to tell girls how their back pockets really compliment their eyes.

lol'd

1) "Accidentally" bump into girl of interest

 

and then say

 

if you wanted to meet me you could have just walked up and said hi, you didn't have to get all violent about it

 

That's a good line actually... Should work.

[RpgGamer]

I second the motion for the ASAP response. No one likes waiting around. Catch the opurtunity in it's prime. That night would be a good place to start. As for when you want to see her? Whenever is convenient for both of you works fine. There's no reason why it shouldn't, right?

 

...and I don't have the 'new girl's ' number, which is why I'm kicking myself. She's not mad at me, but I doubt I have any attraction value left. Luckily I did walk by her today [small town :D] waved and said hello. Wasn't too awkward. I just need to strike up some sort of conversation.

[Iamdan]

That three day rule holds no water in the real world. It really just pisses girls off. I'd go with tomorrow.

 

EDIT: Or today, depending on when it is for you.

 

Plus in 3 days her attraction would have died down if you had just met her. That's if she didn't forget you altogether. I got the idea of texting her as soon as I get the number, while I'm still talking to her. 2 conversations at the same time are fun, plus it works great.

 

Oh and use callback humor when you make first contact after getting a number. If she is in an emoted state and attracted to you, making a hillbilly joke because she told you she lives in a rural area the next day will bring those feeling back that come with the memories.

 

That's a good line actually... Should work.

 

You seem surprised : /

[RpgGamer]

The [bleep] slept with him.

 

I'm [bleep]ing done. [bleep] women. They're all [bleep]y whorey sleazy garbage that are out to rip your heart out. Just [bleep] 'em.

 

I can't believe I ever considered trying to win her back...ever. What a waste of [bleep]ing time.

[Jeffwilson99]

The [bleep] slept with him.

 

I'm [bleep]ing done. [bleep] women. They're all [bleep]y whorey sleazy garbage that are out to rip your heart out. Just [bleep] 'em.

 

I can't believe I ever considered trying to win her back...ever. What a waste of [bleep]ing time.

 

 

My answer to that is:

 

You seem surprised : /

 

Oh yeah, in case y'all are wondering, I already know this girl, sort of, it's not like I randomly just go her number, incae you though so. If I didn't know her and just got her number, I would have text her already :wink:

[Furah]

The [bleep] slept with him.

 

I'm [bleep]ing done. [bleep] women. They're all [bleep]y whorey sleazy garbage that are out to rip your heart out. Just [bleep] 'em.

 

I can't believe I ever considered trying to win her back...ever. What a waste of [bleep]ing time.

Take a holiday over here in Aus, as an American you'll have an accent, so women will take interest in you just because of that. Plus everything is cheaper here, and Dan and myself will sort you out.

[RpgGamer]

The [bleep] slept with him.

 

I'm [bleep]ing done. [bleep] women. They're all [bleep]y whorey sleazy garbage that are out to rip your heart out. Just [bleep] 'em.

 

I can't believe I ever considered trying to win her back...ever. What a waste of [bleep]ing time.

Take a holiday over here in Aus, as an American you'll have an accent, so women will take interest in you just because of that. Plus everything is cheaper here, and Dan and myself will sort you out.

 

 

Careful, I might take you up on that offer :')

Thank you. Your console means alot.

 

I've gone numb. i went through a good 10minutes of EXTREME anger. Then I realized I wasn't sure what to do. Now, I don't feel anything. ...I think I might see my school psychologist tomorow. I've been daydreaming of...well...not very good things. And now I don't feel anything at all. As a future psychologist myself, I know these aren't good signs. ...I really don't have time for therapy though. Why the hell did I get this involved in this girl? What on god's green Earth was I thinking?

[Furah]

Careful, I might take you up on that offer :')

Thank you. Your console means alot.

That's what bros are for. :thumbup:

[Tim]

and Dan and myself will sort you out.

Oi, you two aren't the only Aussies here. <.<

[Romy]

That's a good line actually... Should work.

 

You seem surprised : /

 

Not because it was you, it was because a second earlier I read Rpg's weird suggestion and my brain just reacted to the contrast (no offence Rpg :P).

[muggiwhplar]

The [bleep] slept with him.

 

I'm [bleep]ing done. [bleep] women. They're all [bleep]y whorey sleazy garbage that are out to rip your heart out. Just [bleep] 'em.

 

I can't believe I ever considered trying to win her back...ever. What a waste of [bleep]ing time.

Take a holiday over here in Aus, as an American you'll have an accent, so women will take interest in you just because of that. Plus everything is cheaper here, and Dan and myself will sort you out.

 

 

Careful, I might take you up on that offer :')

Thank you. Your console means alot.

 

I've gone numb. i went through a good 10minutes of EXTREME anger. Then I realized I wasn't sure what to do. Now, I don't feel anything. ...I think I might see my school psychologist tomorow. I've been daydreaming of...well...not very good things. And now I don't feel anything at all. As a future psychologist myself, I know these aren't good signs. ...I really don't have time for therapy though. Why the hell did I get this involved in this girl? What on god's green Earth was I thinking?

 

Time fixes that issue... that, and reflecting on your previous bad experiences and learning how to avoid/conquer them in the future.

 

I apologize if this hurts and feels like I'm kicking you when you're down, but this is the reason why I feel like no one on this thread has the right to call themselves a "guru." It's like the blind leading the blind... people should be able to fix and manage their own problems before trying to fix and manage other people's. Sorry... just had to say that. :unsure:

[RpgGamer]

You're opinion is noted. but I doubt I'm the only person with problems to ever give advice. It makes me a hypocrit on occasion, surely. but that doesn't take away from the value of my opinions. If I weren't me, I'd yell at me like you guys did, if not more. I know I'm an idiot. I've realized that quite some time ago. But that "masochism" as it's been deemed, keeps me crawling back in my times of weakness. Besides....for the most part I'm the first line of responses for most of the issues ever posted in this thread for the past year or so [excluding the past month]

 

and no offense taken romy, I know it was a horrible line, but that was kind of the point.

[muggiwhplar]

I feel kinda mean for leaving you one line of advice followed by my criticism lol, so here's some personal experience:

 

about two years ago I broke up w/ my girlfriend of 3 years and I was pretty much devastated... your feelings of depression are normal. at least, they're the same I was feeling. I was extremely pissed off at times, sad and depressed at others, and then sometimes I'd just feel numb after all of it-- nothing would upset or amuse me-- I was just emotionless and empty. Though, after moving to college and joining my fraternity and making 70 close friends instantly, I got back on my feet a lot quicker than I would have otherwise. It still burned even during college, but every day it hurt less and less till after a while I didn't care at all anymore and I just reflected upon it and it made me a lot stronger. I also changed a few aspects of my personality to prevent future errors in relationships, and to use that relationship as experience for future ones. you're gonna be hurting for a while probably-- best thing you can do is learn that it'll stop hurting eventually and it's not the end of the world. not everybody you meet is as perfect as they seem to be. hang out w/ your close friends and either write up your feelings on a computer or let a friend listen to you... catharsis is extremely helpful. a friend has the same cathartic effect as a professional psychologist (psych study demonstrated that effect... I am also a psychology major) so you might as well spend your time w/ a friend instead of someone you don't even know.

 

best of luck to you, you seem like a strong person. hopefully you'll recover quicker than I did ;)

[RpgGamer]

:) Thank you my friend. i know there's a road to recovery a head of me. Especially with college so close. I just have to get thrugh the summer. I'd rather not do it flingless, but sometimes life just sucks like that. Friends have helped me out of this crap before, they can do it again.

[Omar]

...

You should post here more often. We've got people who can help you before a relationship, but hardly any during said relationship.

[Kiriyama]

...

You should post here more often. We've got people who can help you before a relationship, but hardly any during said relationship.

 

Rarely does anyone post about troubles during a relationship.

[Omar]

Rarely does anyone post about troubles during a relationship.

It would still be nice if we could have someone who's more interested in attracting for the long-term than for the short term.

[Amaranth_GTO]

I know that there are plenty of people here who can give advice on keeping a relationship going. The thing is, the only advice that gets asked for is how to get the girl in the first place, and then how to break it off with her

[muggiwhplar]

Rarely does anyone post about troubles during a relationship.

It would still be nice if we could have someone who's more interested in attracting for the long-term than for the short term.

 

I made a long post about my feelings towards this topic a while ago. In a nutshell, it seems to me that most people on this thread are more interested in just dating or having sex with hot girls, rather than getting into relationships or falling in love (which is surprising since the topic title is "'I want a girlfriend,' and other relationship advice"). It also seems that a lot of people here have just become disenchanted with the idea of getting into a relationship or falling in love. Additionally, a few people have stated in the past that they have some pretty serious psychological problems (which makes maintaining a relationship pretty complicated).

 

Picking up girls is easy. You can do that w/o being yourself-- you can have a cool (fake) personality and act like hot [cabbage] and they'll all flock to you. However, after you've been dating the same girl for over a year, trying to be someone you're not, it becomes pretty obvious to the girl that you're acting like someone you're not, and things begin to fall apart. The most important thing about being in a relationship is to be yourself... something which seems to be unrecommended around here, unfortunately.

 

Though, being someone you're not isn't always a bad thing. A few years ago I did a lot of self-examination and basically thought of traits that I wished I had, and decided if they were really as important as they appeared to be. Then, if they were important, I focused on developing them. So, for a while I wasn't really "myself" until I had matured those traits and they became part of who I am now. Similarly, I also looked at all of my "flaws" and thought about them-- were they really flaws that would mess up my life or were they just imagined flaws? If they were serious flaws, was there anything I could do to fix them? If not, could I learn to deal with them?

 

As I've said before, a lot of people around here seem to have some serious flaws and aren't doing anything about them. Instead of taking the long, difficult route of doing lots of self-examination and improvement, they're taking the easy way out of covering it up with a fake persona which they don't seem to be benefiting or learning from. Then again, though, as mentioned previously, not many people around here actually seem to mind being single, so I guess nothing's wrong :P

 

Back to your original comment, though, I don't post much around here since I feel like I'm from a completely different "school of thought" than everyone else around here, so my advice always conflicts with theirs. It all depends on what the person asking for help wants, and how badly they want it.

[Faux]

The [bleep] slept with him.

 

I'm [bleep]ing done. [bleep] women. They're all [bleep]y whorey sleazy garbage that are out to rip your heart out. Just [bleep] 'em.

 

I can't believe I ever considered trying to win her back...ever. What a waste of [bleep]ing time.

your ex slept with another guy, big deal that's what they do

[Kiriyama]

[hide= Long quote]

Rarely does anyone post about troubles during a relationship.

It would still be nice if we could have someone who's more interested in attracting for the long-term than for the short term.

 

I made a long post about my feelings towards this topic a while ago. In a nutshell, it seems to me that most people on this thread are more interested in just dating or having sex with hot girls, rather than getting into relationships or falling in love (which is surprising since the topic title is "'I want a girlfriend,' and other relationship advice"). It also seems that a lot of people here have just become disenchanted with the idea of getting into a relationship or falling in love. Additionally, a few people have stated in the past that they have some pretty serious psychological problems (which makes maintaining a relationship pretty complicated).

 

Picking up girls is easy. You can do that w/o being yourself-- you can have a cool (fake) personality and act like hot [cabbage] and they'll all flock to you. However, after you've been dating the same girl for over a year, trying to be someone you're not, it becomes pretty obvious to the girl that you're acting like someone you're not, and things begin to fall apart. The most important thing about being in a relationship is to be yourself... something which seems to be unrecommended around here, unfortunately.

 

Though, being someone you're not isn't always a bad thing. A few years ago I did a lot of self-examination and basically thought of traits that I wished I had, and decided if they were really as important as they appeared to be. Then, if they were important, I focused on developing them. So, for a while I wasn't really "myself" until I had matured those traits and they became part of who I am now. Similarly, I also looked at all of my "flaws" and thought about them-- were they really flaws that would mess up my life or were they just imagined flaws? If they were serious flaws, was there anything I could do to fix them? If not, could I learn to deal with them?

 

As I've said before, a lot of people around here seem to have some serious flaws and aren't doing anything about them. Instead of taking the long, difficult route of doing lots of self-examination and improvement, they're taking the easy way out of covering it up with a fake persona which they don't seem to be benefiting or learning from. Then again, though, as mentioned previously, not many people around here actually seem to mind being single, so I guess nothing's wrong :P

 

Back to your original comment, though, I don't post much around here since I feel like I'm from a completely different "school of thought" than everyone else around here, so my advice always conflicts with theirs. It all depends on what the person asking for help wants, and how badly they want it.

[/hide]

 

I think you're right. Personally, I've been more interested in longer term relationships, and have actually had a few problems in the past, but I've never posted them here. I prefer to PM certain users about them, or ask people I know.

 

Nothing against the people on this thread, of course, it's just I disagree with how they think. Perhaps it is those with the problems see the majority of the posts here and are driven away from posting them. If we go far enough back into the thread, there was other problems being posted, some during romantic relationships, whilst others to do with family members and maybe to do with friends a few times.

[BlackDawn]

[hide= Long quote]

Rarely does anyone post about troubles during a relationship.

It would still be nice if we could have someone who's more interested in attracting for the long-term than for the short term.

 

I made a long post about my feelings towards this topic a while ago. In a nutshell, it seems to me that most people on this thread are more interested in just dating or having sex with hot girls, rather than getting into relationships or falling in love (which is surprising since the topic title is "'I want a girlfriend,' and other relationship advice"). It also seems that a lot of people here have just become disenchanted with the idea of getting into a relationship or falling in love. Additionally, a few people have stated in the past that they have some pretty serious psychological problems (which makes maintaining a relationship pretty complicated).

 

Picking up girls is easy. You can do that w/o being yourself-- you can have a cool (fake) personality and act like hot [cabbage] and they'll all flock to you. However, after you've been dating the same girl for over a year, trying to be someone you're not, it becomes pretty obvious to the girl that you're acting like someone you're not, and things begin to fall apart. The most important thing about being in a relationship is to be yourself... something which seems to be unrecommended around here, unfortunately.

 

Though, being someone you're not isn't always a bad thing. A few years ago I did a lot of self-examination and basically thought of traits that I wished I had, and decided if they were really as important as they appeared to be. Then, if they were important, I focused on developing them. So, for a while I wasn't really "myself" until I had matured those traits and they became part of who I am now. Similarly, I also looked at all of my "flaws" and thought about them-- were they really flaws that would mess up my life or were they just imagined flaws? If they were serious flaws, was there anything I could do to fix them? If not, could I learn to deal with them?

 

As I've said before, a lot of people around here seem to have some serious flaws and aren't doing anything about them. Instead of taking the long, difficult route of doing lots of self-examination and improvement, they're taking the easy way out of covering it up with a fake persona which they don't seem to be benefiting or learning from. Then again, though, as mentioned previously, not many people around here actually seem to mind being single, so I guess nothing's wrong :P

 

Back to your original comment, though, I don't post much around here since I feel like I'm from a completely different "school of thought" than everyone else around here, so my advice always conflicts with theirs. It all depends on what the person asking for help wants, and how badly they want it.

[/hide]

 

I think you're right. Personally, I've been more interested in longer term relationships, and have actually had a few problems in the past, but I've never posted them here. I prefer to PM certain users about them, or ask people I know.

 

Nothing against the people on this thread, of course, it's just I disagree with how they think. Perhaps it is those with the problems see the majority of the posts here and are driven away from posting them. If we go far enough back into the thread, there was other problems being posted, some during romantic relationships, whilst others to do with family members and maybe to do with friends a few times.

Although I've posted on this thread maybe once or twice, I lurk a hell of a lot, and I remember those times. Back when the thread was at it's peak of glory, when the so called 'gurus' didn't only give advice on meeting girls for flings and short term relationships. I miss when people posted actual problems in their loving relationship, and the good natured people here gave some damn good advice.

 

To be fair, pretty much all of those Tifers that gave such advice have moved on by now, and others have tried to fill their shoes. No offense meant to RPG or Dan, I know you try, but your advice really isn't the best for lasting relationships. I miss Goddess and Ginger.

 

Oh, and those acronyms piss me off. Seriously.

[Lenticular_J]

It's probably because (over) half the kids on this board are under 18 and don't even have the stones to get in a relationship to begin with. You're forgetting that Goddess is married, and as I remember, Ginger was English.

[Kiriyama]

Lent, you say that, but you've got to remember.. This thread used to have people asking about all kinds of relationship problems.

 

And what does Ginger being English have to do with anything?