"I want a girlfriend/boyfriend", and other such relationship advice

[Omar]

A: Don't even talk to me ever, and B: Have a boyfriend already.

Meet new people. I'm sure you can find a friend of yours who knows a bunch of people you don't know (from another school for example). You just hold on to him/her and bang his/her friends.

[Furah]

First kiss last night :D

Get a number? :thumbsup:

[RpgGamer]

First kiss last night

 

 

Hell yeah brotha man! e-five! :D

 

 

@sarge1010

 

she was your frist girlfriend. So this is your first break up. I remember that. It's hell. But I promise you with every cell in my body, it gets easier everytime. Whether you actually loved her or not is a moot point. We're not here to critique your emotional maturity. Just know, that this isn't the end of the world, no matter how much it feels like it. I remember feeling the exact same way. She hurts you, but instead of taking it and moving on, you stick around because you could never do anything against her better interests. Trust me, I get that. But the fact remains, you can't let yourself get in this bad of shape. Meet new people. I guarentee you'll feel better after connecting to some new contacts. you'll be alright. it might not feel like it right now. But trust me, it gets better.

[Donkeykong23]

bolded part worries me a bit. If you trust her, and know her, you know if you will get back together or not. If you do, great. If you don't...I really hope you've gotten all the negative feelings out of your system by then. Throwing up when a girl breaks up with you? Sheesh, that's pretty rough. But hey. Enjoy your new found singularity. Think of something taht she would never let you do. Then do it. a million times. just to spite her. Seriously...it feels good.

 

The thing is.... she was my first girlfriend. And any other girls I would consider going out with either A: Don't even talk to me ever, and B: Have a boyfriend already. I had a bonfire with some friends tonight, so I'm feeling better. And I only threw up because when I was brushing my teeth this morning a sudden gag-reflex occured, and yea... I didn't eat much today lol.

 

And no, I could never do anything like that. I love her too much, and would never do anything to hurt her in any way. Yes I am sad we broke up, but I'm not angry at her or anything. Whenever I see her upset or crying... god I just feel awful and want to try everything to make her feel better... Ah well. Just wanted to say that lol. (Why am I even on here right now? It's like... midnight lol)

 

you didn't love her, you just think you did.

 

:thumbup:

 

Sums up almost every middle - high school relationship.

[RpgGamer]

bolded part worries me a bit. If you trust her, and know her, you know if you will get back together or not. If you do, great. If you don't...I really hope you've gotten all the negative feelings out of your system by then. Throwing up when a girl breaks up with you? Sheesh, that's pretty rough. But hey. Enjoy your new found singularity. Think of something taht she would never let you do. Then do it. a million times. just to spite her. Seriously...it feels good.

 

The thing is.... she was my first girlfriend. And any other girls I would consider going out with either A: Don't even talk to me ever, and B: Have a boyfriend already. I had a bonfire with some friends tonight, so I'm feeling better. And I only threw up because when I was brushing my teeth this morning a sudden gag-reflex occured, and yea... I didn't eat much today lol.

 

And no, I could never do anything like that. I love her too much, and would never do anything to hurt her in any way. Yes I am sad we broke up, but I'm not angry at her or anything. Whenever I see her upset or crying... god I just feel awful and want to try everything to make her feel better... Ah well. Just wanted to say that lol. (Why am I even on here right now? It's like... midnight lol)

 

you didn't love her, you just think you did.

 

 

Sums up almost every middle - high school relationship.

 

I respectfully completely disagree. Generally, yes. But you can't say all pre-college relationships are like that. There's always those few that are legit relationships. Who's to say which are which?

[RpgGamer]

I AM OLDER THAN YOU AND THEREFORE I KNOW MORE

 

 

except flyingjj is the oldest frequenter of this thread. followed by myself, IamDan...then way down the chain is Lent. Age has very little to do with anything. It's all about experience. And you're like...14? right?

[Amaranth_GTO]

Big yeah. I forget who it was, but someone had a nice quote about this in their sig.

 

Oh, and I forgot my sarcasm tags. my bad.

hey that makes us the same age... high-5!

But in all seriousness, congrats on the kiss. isn't the other sex great?

[Amaranth_GTO]

It does tend to happen like that... But hey if you like kissing you'll enjoy everything else even more ;)

[Jeffwilson99]

 

 

Sums up almost every middle - high school relationship.

 

I respectfully completely disagree. Generally, yes. But you can't say all pre-college relationships are like that. There's always those few that are legit relationships. Who's to say which are which?

 

See, that's why he said almost

 

And I'm older than you too buddy ;-)

[Tim]

I AM OLDER THAN YOU AND THEREFORE I KNOW MORE

 

 

except flyingjj is the oldest frequenter of this thread. followed by myself, IamDan...then way down the chain is Lent. Age has very little to do with anything. It's all about experience. And you're like...14? right?

If we're talking age, I think some of us are a bit older then you, dunno about Dan since his profile doesn't list it. (unless of course you were talking about the "gurus")

 

OT: I think my friend might have fallen pregnant to her boyfriend, which makes it un-easy on me since she was both my ex (one of them) and a very close friend still. :|

[Lenticular_J]

You could always punch her in the stomach, I guess. Um, I mean, that's bad! Now, catching up with me since this is one of two threads I remotely care about:

 

I'm ready for this summer. There will be absolutely nothing serious with girls in it - it's all about me. Getting money and [bleep]ing [bleep]es. And self-improvement or whatever. Me, my dad and my brother are starting a concrete curbing business, going in to Phoenix, AZ for training in a little more than a week. Luckily the area we live in has only one major competitor, and they held a monopoly (more like an oligarchy) at a ridiculous price (approx. $9 per linear foot of curbing, whereas in Dallas it's around three). Even undercutting him by half (won't do) will prove ridiculously profitable, and sense I'll be making a minimum of a dollar a foot (maybe ten seconds total to lay), the rest split between my dad, brother, and the business' expenses. We're shooting for a ten thousand dollar profit this year, which won't be hard at all. Will be nice.

 

I'm also looking for a good barber and tailor. Hard to find, although I think I've nabbed a tailor with a good reputation. There are only a couple actual tailors in this town, the rest are dry cleaners that also do terrible alterations. Barber may be more difficult - I want a guy I can befriend like a tailor, and that also offers straight razor shaves. Might be tough. Although I have a friend that goes to UT in Austin (where I'll be headed in two years) that has started his own sartorial hobbies, and thinks he's found a great barber and tailor, and intends to mention me when I come down. How nice.

 

As to the gents on here: the modern gentleman is making a comeback. If you combine all the fun and arrogance with chivalry and, well, gentlemanship, you will make an even more lasting impression than with either alone. Our times may soon be turbulent. Master manly skills. Carry an umbrella. Wear sunscreen.

 

Kick some [wagon].

[RpgGamer]

HOO RAH!

 

(I love Lent's inspirational posts lol)

 

I think my friend might have fallen pregnant

 

that's not a fun experience I imagine. If you're pregnant - DONT FALL!

 

is she happy about being pregnant or is this more of a teenage knocked up situation?

[Iamdan]

If we're talking age, I think some of us are a bit older then you, dunno about Dan since his profile doesn't list it.

 

19

[Zygimantas]

If we're talking age, I think some of us are a bit older then you, dunno about Dan since his profile doesn't list it.

 

19

O rly? For some reason I always imagined you to be like 25 :lol:

[Omar]

Master manly skills. Carry an umbrella. Wear sunscreen.

Carry a pocket square in your back jean pocket. Learn to shuck oysters, to make cocktails, to cook.

[Gilformen]

well, i dont think any of you guys know me, unless toast drops by again, so hi.

 

ive moved twice in the past year or so, im shy, suck with the whole be-confident deal, and ive been depressed a while.

 

made a few friends out here through work, and i hang out with them a bit, but otherwise i dont get out much.

 

one friend in particular has really been trying hard to help me work on my crappy outlook, and convinced me to go to a dance

 

that was pretty fun. i didnt chill out as much i probably should have, but it was good i went. even when ive had a lot more friends

 

in the past, ive never been good at communicating, and for a while its basically been me holed up by myself in my room with music

 

and books/games/drawing when im not working. i hate being alone, and i hate going out and worrying about what people think of me.

 

i can totally get being more relaxed and outgoing and just being someone people would want to be around, but trying to just chill

 

in a situation im not really familiar with, i keep second guessing myself not trying anything new.

 

so if you skipped to the bottom so you could get the summary,

 

i need to learn how to dance, some confidence, a close friend/girlfriend, i need to start exercising

 

and im going to spend less time sitting here.

[Iamdan]

i need to learn how to dance, some confidence, a close friend/girlfriend, i need to start exercising

 

You don't need to know how to dance, or a get girlfriend.

 

I don't have a girlfriend, and I can't dance (but I make up for it with enthusiasm :wink:) and I do just fine.

 

Just find some hobbies. Exercising is a good one. Eating well + exercise will make you feel much better right off the bat. Learn guitar or a new language, or learn survival skills, or read up about psychology and body language. Find things that interest you (that don't involve computers) and do them.

 

Read through the thread and start dressing better. Go to bed and wake up at better times. There are so many things you can do to feel great.

 

As for socializing, make it a point to talk to people. Create a persona and give him a name. This persona is confident in social situations, and is the highlight of any party. He doesn't care what people think of him, he just has fun and that rubs off on everyone around him. Get a feel of how he behaves. Now, act like this person when you think of it. Just step out of your body and become him as best you can. Keep pushing yourself out of your comfort zone.

 

Go out at least once a week. Meet at least 1 new person. No excuses or I come down and slap you.

[Tim]

HOO RAH!

 

(I love Lent's inspirational posts lol)

 

I think my friend might have fallen pregnant

 

that's not a fun experience I imagine. If you're pregnant - DONT FALL!

 

is she happy about being pregnant or is this more of a teenage knocked up situation?

Hence the "I think" part. I dunno if she is since her boyfriend is paranoid about pregnancy (condom + pill + rod)

 

@Dan, oh your kidding me. We're practically the same age (if not, older) yet I haven't even been out drunk once or stumbled home with a woman yet. god damn NSW sucks, and not just at Rugby either...

[Iamdan]

@Dan, oh your kidding me. We're practically the same age (if not, older) yet I haven't even been out drunk once or stumbled home with a woman yet. god damn NSW sucks, and not just at Rugby either...

 

Come up then :thumbup:

[Furah]

@Dan, oh your kidding me. We're practically the same age (if not, older) yet I haven't even been out drunk once or stumbled home with a woman yet. god damn NSW sucks, and not just at Rugby either...

 

Come up then :thumbup:

If I had a guaranteed job and a place to stay up there, I'd be there in a heartbeat, with Tim closely behind.

[Jeffwilson99]

Surely where you guys live can´t be as bad you make it out to be?

[RpgGamer]

i need to learn how to dance, some confidence, a close friend/girlfriend, i need to start exercising

 

You don't need to know how to dance, or a get girlfriend.

 

I don't have a girlfriend, and I can't dance (but I make up for it with enthusiasm ) and I do just fine.

 

Just find some hobbies. Exercising is a good one. Eating well + exercise will make you feel much better right off the bat. Learn guitar or a new language, or learn survival skills, or read up about psychology and body language. Find things that interest you (that don't involve computers) and do them.

 

Read through the thread and start dressing better. Go to bed and wake up at better times. There are so many things you can do to feel great.

 

As for socializing, make it a point to talk to people. Create a persona and give him a name. This persona is confident in social situations, and is the highlight of any party. He doesn't care what people think of him, he just has fun and that rubs off on everyone around him. Get a feel of how he behaves. Now, act like this person when you think of it. Just step out of your body and become him as best you can. Keep pushing yourself out of your comfort zone.

 

Go out at least once a week. Meet at least 1 new person. No excuses or I come down and slap you.

 

 

I prefer to think of it as less of a persona and more of an unexplored version of yourself. Seems less fake that way. It's always going to be you, but it's supposed to be natural, or you can run into many other problems down the line. Otherwise yes - find a hobby. Get off the internet, and do something with yourself. The skill of dancing isn't essential [although I find it to be fun as hell]. And don't worry about the need for a girlfriend. Needing it isn't going to get you one. Incfact, in life's weird irony, I only seem to find girls that I like when I'm not looking for them. As soon as you stop caring about having a girlfriend, life will throw a girl in your direction.

[muggiwhplar]

On that note, if you want to be better at socializing or developing your persona, a good way to do it is to constantly hang out w/ people who have the qualities you desire. They'll start rubbing off on you.

 

For example, I met my childhood best friend in 2nd grade and he always had a great sense of humor. I never had much of one until I started hanging out with him, and after a while I was always joking around and making people laugh. Similarly, most of my friends have unique senses of humor which crack me up-- I've noticed that I have a tendency to adopt some of their comedic style as my own after a while. I never change my comedic style to theirs completely-- rather I always keep my own but add a little bit of theirs to my own. So after all the friends I've made, I've learned a wide variety of comedy styles that I use to make people laugh. Some people find certain things hilarious while other people don't. It's really easy for me to tell what'll make anybody laugh nowadays, and that ability has all mostly come from hanging out with my hilarious friends.

 

Similarly, if you wanna be more confident or outgoing, start hanging out with people you know who are really confident and/or outgoing. This is probably one of the main reasons why joining my fraternity was the greatest decision of my life-- instantly making 70 new friends whom I've learned so much from. I've improved just about every aspect of my life from hanging out with all of them.

 

It's important to note, though, that I've never really tried to emulate any of my friends-- their personalities just rub off on me and I start acting slightly more like they do when I hang out with them unintentionally. So if you've got a friend who's a [kitty]-magnet, don't try and act like him and do everything he does or say everything he says-- just hang out with him a lot and it'll just automatically internalize.

 

Semi-relevant anecdote:

One of my closest friends I've made at college is a natural ladies-man. The funny thing is, we'll be eating dinner somewhere and a hot waitress will serve us, and he can say ANYTHING he wants to her-- he can say "You have beautiful eyes" (he never says that btw) or "What the [bleep] is wrong with your face" (that wouldn't be unusual...) and regardless of what he says, the girl will always melt and find him irresistible. When I first met him, I had no clue how he could pull off the things he did, so of course I asked a girlfriend of mine what she thought about him. She said "he has a very genuine smile." --apparently that's all you need to say whatever the [bleep] you want haha. Anyways, I've known him for two years now and so his personality has rubbed off on me a little. If I want, I can talk to a girl the same way he does and get a similar response. The main reason why he's so charming is because he's himself. If I had tried doing what he does two years ago before I met him, I'd probably get slapped because it would look awkward since I'm not the kind of person to say such things (and that's obvious to girls). Like I said, though-- now that I've hung out with him so much, things have become much different. . .

 

Hope my incoherent rambling was informative, lol.

[Lenticular_J]

On that note, if you want to be better at socializing or developing your persona, a good way to do it is to constantly hang out w/ people who have the qualities you desire. They'll start rubbing off on you.

A-O! It's what I did. I generally don't hang out with people if they aren't remarkable in ways I find interesting - and I've stopped hanging out with people when they got boring. Kind of bad in that it can alienate folks, but eventually they'll forget about that.

[RpgGamer]

/adv/

 

 

I promised a more recent photo like 3 weeks ago. This is my new haircut in a semi-candid shot. Only recent picture I have. In 10 days I'll have a TON more though. Comments? Concerns? I'm going mo-hawk in less than a month, so you can say what you want about the hair, it won't bother me.