Use Skype or soemthing, rather than pay for a phone call...Then you can contact people otuside of the USA too.

Use Skype or soemthing, rather than pay for a phone call...Then you can contact people otuside of the USA too.

 

 

I was thinking more along the lines of texting...and I'm pretty sure that cell phone to cell phone calls work regardless of country, but I'm not 100% on that. Plus, I don't have skype

Plus, I don't have skype

it's free.

Use Skype or soemthing, rather than pay for a phone call...Then you can contact people otuside of the USA too.

 

 

I was thinking more along the lines of texting...and I'm pretty sure that cell phone to cell phone calls work regardless of country, but I'm not 100% on that. Plus, I don't have skype

 

Mobile to mobile should generally work anywhere in the world where there is a signal, but depending on your provider it can/will cost you a fortune to make the call.

Yeah, that's my point. Overseas calling genreally costs heaps.

I need advice. I can't figure out how to get physical with this girl. She leans on my shoulder, we sort of cuddle a little, I know she's into me, but it's not "just happening" like it did when I just met my friend. I can't put my arm around her waist because she thinks I'm going to tickle her every time, I do it too much. :P

I need advice. I can't figure out how to get physical with this girl. She leans on my shoulder, we sort of cuddle a little, I know she's into me, but it's not "just happening" like it did when I just met my friend. I can't put my arm around her waist because she thinks I'm going to tickle her every time, I do it too much.

 

 

Common problem. How long have you two been together, and how physical are you trying to get?

 

If it's 2+ months, and you're going for anything...simply make out. Use your hands to glide from one "hot spot" to the "target" [pending what you're going for]. Hair -> shoulder -> wrist -> waist -> upshirt has worked well for me. Otherwise there's knee -> inner thigh -> slowly, gently rise in inner thigh -> zipper [with some "coincidental" brushing] is also a common one. And I'm sure you can take it from there. You just have to be in the right mood. If she's still scared of being tickled...she's not in the right mood. Get her to the right mood, and the rest is so much easier than you think.

It's been two weeks, seen her 4 times in total (one of which I didn't talk to her at all), and I'm trying to get a kiss out of her. I just talked to her friend and she explained to me why she sort of pulled away every time we got close, it's not because of me and I just need to give her time. But keep suggesting, it's good to know anyways.

It's been two weeks, seen her 4 times in total (one of which I didn't talk to her at all), and I'm trying to get a kiss out of her. I just talked to her friend and she explained to me why she sort of pulled away every time we got close, it's not because of me and I just need to give her time. But keep suggesting, it's good to know anyways.

 

 

oh, my bad XD

I figured you'd been together a little longer than 4 dates lol. Why didn't you talk to her the one time? And why haven't you kissed her after 2 whole weeks?!?

...regardless

 

In for the kiss:

 

[hide=Slogan]JUST DO IT[/hide]

seriously. hold her hand. stop her. look into her eyes. glance at her lips. lick your lips. back at her eyes. lean in. breathe through your nose. You come 90%, and she should come the other 10%. close your eyes after contact and keep them shut. nose breathing only at a light pace. not fast. not hard.

 

..and freaking kiss her!

 

jesus.

 

you need any tips on that while I'm at it? I'm going to be up for a little longer if you need it.

 

Not too sure how many people care, but awhile back i posted about my exgirlfriend dilemna. Well, I finially got to talk to her about that night and we are back to 'dating' . So thanks for the help guys, especially magekillr for giving me the confidence to make a move .

 

 

Nostalgia [bleep].

 

God damn...

 

Re-reading this thread is highly beneficial. The old guru generation lives onward in the archives of the thread. Good god, I miss their reign. This was totally worth my 2,501st post for the upgrade past 'Demon Vanquisher'. Jesus. I love this thread all over again.

 

While I'm here, I'll spit some kissing tips:

 

1) breathe through your nose at a normal, steady pace, not fast, not hard

1.5) close your eyes on contact, you freak

2) move his/her lips from paralel -> in between your own

3a) hands on the side of her neck,[thumb just above her jaw line] usually your leaned side hand is the upper one, the other being the 'lower' hand for her leg/arm/chest/other

3b) hands on his back of head, clenching his hair, other used for free roam

4) open lips slightly wider, but remember, you're not eating a sandwhich - you're kissing

5) slide tounge GENTLY AND SLOWLY onto his/her lips

6) if no withdraw, proceed with tounge into his/her mouth [but for the love of god don't shove it in like a dagger going for a kill stab]

7) clench hands regardless of placement [with obvious exception]

8) move head rhythmically, slightly, in sync with partner. Emphasis on SLIGHTLY. Nothing's worse than headbanging kissers.

9) rub areas with hands [see also: 'hotspots']

*) protip: have a 'signature' move. Something taht you come up with, that isn't too freaky. If it is freaky, give him/her some warning first. I'd give you mine, but that's a secret of the trade ;)

 

[hide=Hot spots]

On Girls: [some not involved in kissing, but simple escalation]

Level one:

hold her hand

hands on her knee

arms intertwined

use the relaxed knuckles of your hand and glide accross her cheek

hand on 'love handles', from side [basically her hip, but you'll feel your hand sort of fit better]

 

Level two:

hand on love handles, from facing her

mid thigh

embracing hug

shoulders

 

level three:

inner thigh

stomache/mid torso

kiss her neck [careful on the roughness, some girls go for gentle, others for rough]

nibble her ear [GENTLY FOR THE LOVE OF GOD]

 

level four:

...Under the forum rules I have to question if I can really properly explain these...

 

 

 

On Guys:

 

level one:

hold hands

hug [and whilst in: taking deep breaths]

stare at his lips

 

level two:

neck

leg

 

level three:

inner thigh

hair/back of head

nails digging into back

 

level four:

...yeah

 

 

[/hide]

I have a feeling Rpg has never been laid.

This is graphic.

Oh God, I never knew people actually have planned steps for these things.....

 

 

That takes out SO much of the experience.

 

 

 

 

Maybe I'm old-fashioned, but I prefer natural, non-planned behaviour over steps known in advance. "For the love of God!"

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I guess, if it makes some guys (or gals) more confident about themselves, it's somewhat worth it. I just hope none of my ex partners pre-planned anything they did. Gah, these memories would lose so much of their weight if they did...

I'm with romy here, so much pre-planning = wtf. You jus tneed to read the signs, I guess that comes with practice, but most of the time the girl will just as keen as you.

Um... so we're [bleep] buddies now. Holy mixed signals, and what a weekend :thumbup:

It's been two weeks, seen her 4 times in total (one of which I didn't talk to her at all), and I'm trying to get a kiss out of her. I just talked to her friend and she explained to me why she sort of pulled away every time we got close, it's not because of me and I just need to give her time. But keep suggesting, it's good to know anyways.

 

oh, my bad XD

I figured you'd been together a little longer than 4 dates lol. Why didn't you talk to her the one time? And why haven't you kissed her after 2 whole weeks?!?

...regardless

 

The first time I saw her was at my friend's concert. I can't socialize with everyone, christ.

The second time was at a party. She was drunk and I was sober and still with my ex. That's two reasons not to pull anything serious, she did come onto me though.

We texted for a while, then we planned something out. I don't remember when it was but it was fun, except we didn't get very physical, she just put her head on my shoulder.

Then I saw her two days ago, she was with her friend, we had fun as well. Stayed on the phone with them while they were drunk, t'was funny.

And I saw her yesterday, with the same friend, then that friend left and we were alone for about an hour and a half. Conversation, a little more physical than last time, but still not much. I hung out with her and a friend she was waiting for, and then I left.

 

Conclusion: I can't count to 5, and I didn't kiss her because she doesn't want to (she wants to take it slow, got dumped by her BF 3 weeks ago and was very hurt).

Um... so we're [bleep] buddies now. Holy mixed signals, and what a weekend :thumbup:

Those are fun, just got to make sure she doesn't start getting clingy. I had a girl like that that I suppose thought it was a good way to get to an actual relationship, while I didn't want that.

I have a feeling Rpg has never been laid.

 

:lol:

 

 

...I'm with romy. Don't plan it out. My list of steps isn't meant to be taken literally and directly. It's just the basic gist of an average physical escalation. Broken down into simple steps that are easy to understand. Remember the part about mood? Mood has to be natural. Nothing works if it isn't.

 

and Dan: :thumbsup:

It's fixed. We'll kiss when she's ready.

Um... so we're [bleep] buddies now. Holy mixed signals, and what a weekend :thumbup:

Bastard. I dont even have one and Im the same age. <.<

Bastard. I dont even have one and Im the same age. <.<

 

My first was when I was like 17. Nothing has ever been official but I've had a few friends and we would ring each other to 'hang out.'

This one was more like.. her: 'omg that was epic, we have to be [bleep] buddies now' me: it sure was, tell your friends I'm here all week :cool:

 

I kinda wanted something more because she's a pretty awesome girl but we're already close friends so it could develop into something else easily anyway. See how it goes.

 

ahh I love life

 

btw you aussies down south, I know some guys looking for a new room mate if you were serious about coming up. Great area, good blokes, 5 mins from me, nice house and a good rent price.

Hello. I have been lurking this thread and I have finally come to seek..well, advice. About a year and a half ago, I started talking to this girl who went to my school. She was really insignificant to me, she just would wish me a happy Easter or birthday or whatever. One day, I heard people talking about her moving. I decided to just talk to her to see how she was feeling and stuff because she always seemed like a lovely girl. To make a very long story short, we became best friends. She considered me the only boy she could trust, and I took great joy in that. So, she became my closest girl friend but I never thought of her as anything more. In the past year and a half we have only had one or two major fights, and currently we are very good friends. To her, I have always been the friend that would be there for her. To me, she was my best friend ever and I would be happy as long as i had her as my friend, nothing more.

 

As our friendship went on, she would have little relationships with some boys, as a result of this, I felt a weird jealousy feeling. I don't want to be with her like that, you know? I love her, goddamn I do, but as a best friend, or a sister, something along those lines. So blah blah, she finally got with a boy and they stuck, and have dated for five months now. She would always talk about him, all the time to me. I'm a very jealous person, that's pretty much my tragic flaw. So, inevitably, I'm jealous.

 

I have lived with it though. But sometime within the last six months, I've had little flares of being upset about her. I often ask questions to myself. "Why NOT me? I love her more than anyone ever will. What's so wrong with me?" Her response to those questions are usually just, "idk" or "because." I've played everything off until very recently.

 

She doesn't live very close to me, about a half an hour away, and we almost never see each other during the school year. So, today, I went to a local amusement park with her. I was very excited to see her, having feeling very strong urges just to be with her, plus, I haven't seen her since February. Maybe too excited..I actually uh, got the runs before I left, haha. It was just supposed to be her and two of my friends and me. I REFUSED to go if I was gonna be the "odd" number person. (I have a big social problem where I HATE being "second priority") Well, she lied so I would go. Upon discovering that she lied, I got pretty mad. At first it wasn't bad. I was near her a lot. (Note that I don't hit on her or something, she's my best friend and it would be weird) About an hour into our little perfect day of fun. She told me her boyfriend was coming. I didn't know him, I just assumed he was an [wagon]. He really wasn't though. Upon his arrival, I became the "fifth wheel" and second priority. I tried to talk to her and stuff but the only time she talked to me was to tell me to hold her bag so she could wrap herself around her boyfriend, or tell me to buy her something. (Which I spent fifteen dollars on her today, and that ruined my chances of getting really good seats for a Goo Goo Dolls concert :???: )

 

I really think the only reason I spent money on her was so she would notice me for once. I've spent so much money on her in the past two months. For fun, I wrote up a professionally made contract saying that if i gave her money she would have to kiss me. :P Which she was supposed to do today..lol. Anyway, after spending five hours in the hot ass sun, carrying her stuff, wasting my money just to see her and her boyfriend be cute together, I got pretttty sick of it. I had a mini temper tantrum and I grabbed her and told her I was going home. I was expecting her to say "Nooo Jakeyyy Poo, I want you to stayyyy." Nah, she said "Ok." turned around and continued being affectionate with her boyfriend. I got really mad then. I turned around to leave, and she said "Wait..who is gonna hold my stuff now?" She wasn't even kidding. I just left. Not even a goodbye hug, just nothing.

 

This left me going home feeling like absolute [cabbage]. She promised me it wouldn't be like it was, but it totally was. This ultimately led me to the point of this message. Everyone there was with their partner. I wasn't. I haven't even come close to having a girlfriend in a long time. I think I have finally pinpointed the problem. I have subconsciously wanted my best friend. Even after she kinda ruined my day, I still feel the same love for her and I immediately missed her once I left. I've talked to her about us together someday.She just flat says no. I want to be the one that can hold her tight like her boyfriend does, I'm so jealous of him.

 

Even to me this sounds like pointless, unorganized, gibberish, I just wanted to give you guys some background info. Plain and flat, I want to be with her forever, whether it's as a partner, or a friend.

 

What my main main main message is: Should I pursue the only girl I have truly ever loved, even though she's my best friend? I have virtually no chance right now though. I just want her to realize I'm the only guy that will ever love her and be here for her, and I don't know how. I'm not even first priority for her. How should I go on with this?

Ehh, I feel your pain bro. I've been there.

 

It's probably not what you want to hear, but don't go after her. I made that mistake, she ended up with my best friend and it still [bleep]s with me today, years after they've broken up I lost 2 best friends that way, and I barely talk to either of them now.

 

I've been in the "if she only gave me a chance, she would see how great I am and fall in love with me" boat too, and it doesn't lead anywhere good.

 

Attraction isn't a choice, and she just doesn't feel it for you. Spending money on her, getting mad when she doesn't give you attention etc only makes you less sexually attractive to her.

 

There are lots of other girls, and while it might not seem like it now, there are plenty who you could have a great relationship with.

 

If you want to move out of friend zone, cut off contact with her almost completely. If you're close now, you can come back 6 months later and it will be like you never parted. Except that you get a clean slate and have the chance to attract her. You have pretty much zero chance with her by continuing to chase her like you are now.

 

If you read my post just above yours about my new [bleep] buddy, I was friend zoned by her originally also. I had no chance and was in a similar position to you, and rather than keep shooting myself in the foot I moved on, met new girls and came back a year later.

 

Try it. In the meantime, meet new people. Meet new girls - you could hit it off with one. If you want to know more about meeting random people, and being the guy that a girl lusts for, rather than the guy she spills her feelings about other guys to, read my blog. Link is in my sig. If there is a topic not covered in there that you want to know about. Let me know and I can add to it.

I did good today

Hello. I have been lurking this thread and I have finally come to seek..well, advice. About a year and a half ago, I started talking to this girl who went to my school. She was really insignificant to me, she just would wish me a happy Easter or birthday or whatever. One day, I heard people talking about her moving. I decided to just talk to her to see how she was feeling and stuff because she always seemed like a lovely girl. To make a very long story short, we became best friends. She considered me the only boy she could trust, and I took great joy in that. So, she became my closest girl friend but I never thought of her as anything more. In the past year and a half we have only had one or two major fights, and currently we are very good friends. To her, I have always been the friend that would be there for her. To me, she was my best friend ever and I would be happy as long as i had her as my friend, nothing more.

 

As our friendship went on, she would have little relationships with some boys, as a result of this, I felt a weird jealousy feeling. I don't want to be with her like that, you know? I love her, goddamn I do, but as a best friend, or a sister, something along those lines. So blah blah, she finally got with a boy and they stuck, and have dated for five months now. She would always talk about him, all the time to me. I'm a very jealous person, that's pretty much my tragic flaw. So, inevitably, I'm jealous.

 

I have lived with it though. But sometime within the last six months, I've had little flares of being upset about her. I often ask questions to myself. "Why NOT me? I love her more than anyone ever will. What's so wrong with me?" Her response to those questions are usually just, "idk" or "because." I've played everything off until very recently.

 

She doesn't live very close to me, about a half an hour away, and we almost never see each other during the school year. So, today, I went to a local amusement park with her. I was very excited to see her, having feeling very strong urges just to be with her, plus, I haven't seen her since February. Maybe too excited..I actually uh, got the runs before I left, haha. It was just supposed to be her and two of my friends and me. I REFUSED to go if I was gonna be the "odd" number person. (I have a big social problem where I HATE being "second priority") Well, she lied so I would go. Upon discovering that she lied, I got pretty mad. At first it wasn't bad. I was near her a lot. (Note that I don't hit on her or something, she's my best friend and it would be weird) About an hour into our little perfect day of fun. She told me her boyfriend was coming. I didn't know him, I just assumed he was an [wagon]. He really wasn't though. Upon his arrival, I became the "fifth wheel" and second priority. I tried to talk to her and stuff but the only time she talked to me was to tell me to hold her bag so she could wrap herself around her boyfriend, or tell me to buy her something. (Which I spent fifteen dollars on her today, and that ruined my chances of getting really good seats for a Goo Goo Dolls concert )

 

I really think the only reason I spent money on her was so she would notice me for once. I've spent so much money on her in the past two months. For fun, I wrote up a professionally made contract saying that if i gave her money she would have to kiss me. Which she was supposed to do today..lol. Anyway, after spending five hours in the hot ass sun, carrying her stuff, wasting my money just to see her and her boyfriend be cute together, I got pretttty sick of it. I had a mini temper tantrum and I grabbed her and told her I was going home. I was expecting her to say "Nooo Jakeyyy Poo, I want you to stayyyy." Nah, she said "Ok." turned around and continued being affectionate with her boyfriend. I got really mad then. I turned around to leave, and she said "Wait..who is gonna hold my stuff now?" She wasn't even kidding. I just left. Not even a goodbye hug, just nothing.

 

This left me going home feeling like absolute [cabbage]. She promised me it wouldn't be like it was, but it totally was. This ultimately led me to the point of this message. Everyone there was with their partner. I wasn't. I haven't even come close to having a girlfriend in a long time. I think I have finally pinpointed the problem. I have subconsciously wanted my best friend. Even after she kinda ruined my day, I still feel the same love for her and I immediately missed her once I left. I've talked to her about us together someday.She just flat says no. I want to be the one that can hold her tight like her boyfriend does, I'm so jealous of him.

 

Even to me this sounds like pointless, unorganized, gibberish, I just wanted to give you guys some background info. Plain and flat, I want to be with her forever, whether it's as a partner, or a friend.

 

What my main main main message is: Should I pursue the only girl I have truly ever loved, even though she's my best friend? I have virtually no chance right now though. I just want her to realize I'm the only guy that will ever love her and be here for her, and I don't know how. I'm not even first priority for her. How should I go on with this?

 

Ouch.

You've landed yourself in one of the worst cases of friendzoned 'oneitis' I've ever seen. You got to get your head back into the "she's my sister" thought train. I have an inkling of a feeling that your jealousy less stemmed from being attracted to her, rather you just want to spend time with your best friend. I'd explain it to her in that way. HOWEVER. if you really are this attracted to her...you may want to stay the hell away from her to weaken the attraction. Well yours of her anyway. Find yourself a new girl. Hell the way she acted at the park, you may want to find some new friends while you're at it. She's taking advantage of your giving friendly nature. And you follwing her around like a sick puppy tossing money at her isn't going to win you anything. You keep this up, and she'll just walk all over you until your so deep in depression you won't even notice anymore. Tell her how it is, and walk away [you might want to find some "plan B" friends first though, incase serious [cabbage] goes down]. Just disappear. If she misses you, she'll come to you. if she doesn't, that [bleep] doesn't deserve you anyway. [And provided she breaks up with her boyfriend, she WILL find you]

 

 

However, I must warn you...A very wise young man once said:

 

 

 

the girl i had oneitis over i know is attracted to me sexually...finally made out with her and had other disclosed relations back in November (not all the way)...and slowly i'm winning her over, but i know in the back of her mind she's still seeing me as that same guy back in high school. no relationship with her as of yet, but i know the chance is there. looking back at point 3, when we had our "rendezvous", she did so because "it felt right" to her. when we talked about it later she didn't know why she did...i don't either except that her emotions just said "this feels so right...go for it". i also think she attributes me to guilt, as she was trying a long distance relationship with another guy...they're no longer together and i'm glad...guy was a [bleep]wad.

 

 

 

don't worry...everyone goes through the same thing, some just get it sooner than others. took me 4 years. i can't complain though...had i known what i know now, i probably would have had a failed relationship with her back then or even our first year of college...and then have 0 shot now. girls shouldn't marry the first guy they meet IMO, need to see what's out there first. so i'm kinda thankful it took all 4 years.

 

 

 

and ending...there's a reason why when you go into divorce courts you'll hear the same line..over, and over, and over, and over...if the divorce occurs over cheating:

 

 

 

"they were my best friend..."

 

 

 

there's a reason...you can be friends, but you must also differentiate between being just friends with sex...and actual life long companions.