Granted, but because the glass is made of mango juice you can't use it before it falls down as all things do because of gravity.

 

I wish I could stop and resume time at my will without ever getting stuck.

Granted, however you get a concussion, you are now stuck, while sensing, in the fraction of a second.

 

I wish nothing could hurt me mentaly.

Granted. Because it's too late for anything to mess you up mentally any more anyways.

 

I wish for a mug.

Like that was news.

You get mugged.

 

I wish for infinite emotional "perfection".

granted.. however... you also become like perfection girl.

 

I wish perfection girl hadn' t happened.

Granted. You get "Perfection Boy" instead.

 

I wish for a toaster.

granted.. it's broken and rusty and always burns your bread to crisps... it also shocks you whenever you touch it.

 

I wish I had an electric eel

Granted, you die of a random anvil to the head.

 

I wish someone laughed at that random occurance, though I don't care what happens to them afterwards.

Granted. They take the anvil and start beating you with it.

 

I wish for an anvil.

most normal people have two anvils in their heads... they laugh at the irony.

 

I wish that themather1 increased his intel level.

Granted, however the resulting consentration of my intelectual capacity leads to a build-up of of unused computing capability. My eagerness to discover then leads me to attempt division by zero, again, only this time succession folows and it results in a quantum singularity of indefinable proportions that eventually grows to envelop Earth. (That is neither gibberish or copied.)

 

I wish for someone to understand the first two sentences in this post.

Granted, but they weren't willing to read it. So you just failed.

 

I wish for the meaning of life.

You learn the answer, and the question as well, and the entire universe collapses and is replaced by something even more ridiculous.

 

I wish for the entire universe to collapse and be replaced with something even more ridiculous.

The universe eventually becomes the same and you realize it will never change and reality is boring.

 

I wish for nihlism.

Granted but your cookie goes stale.

 

I wish for a fist in my face.

Granted, you get a fist inside your face and you die from having a fist in your face.

 

I wish for Omnipotence

Granted, though you are now impotent as well.

 

I wish I were less disturbeding.

Granted, you transform into a bunnie. And get killed to be eaten.

 

I wish I could be like this for ever.

Granted, you are now immortal and will never age further... ever.

 

I wish I could think of a wish.

Granted, but someone posts it before you do, and he gets famous because of it.

 

I wish I won the lottery.

Granted, but you die of something money can't save you from.

 

I wish I could be me

Granted, but you get a concussion and forget who you are.

 

I wish I could stop getting hurt mentally and physically.

Granted, you're dead and can no longer be harmed.

 

I wish I had a swarm of angry bees.

Granted, in a related accident you find out that you are allergic to bee stings.

 

I wish going to the toilet wasn't a neccessity.

Granted, but you lose your job at the toilet store due to downsizing.

 

I wish the Flyers will win their game tonight.