Granted. It brings you a baby.

 

I wish I had a stork.

Granted, it gets caught in a crosswind and ends up bringing you the Grinch, causing IRL stolen Christmas in about 20-30 years.

 

I wish that my bank account never dipped below $40.

Granted. There comes a day when you need the last $40 out of your bank account and you can't get it and you lose your home and your SO leaves you and you end up living in the ozarks with nothing but a small prarie dog for company for the rest of your life.

 

I wish my bank account would never get more than $10,000 in it.

Granted. That's a lifetime limit, and you can only be paid via direct deposit.

 

I wish I could control inanimate objects with my mind.

Granted, this controlling makes the objects animated nullifying your power, until you stop at which time they again become inanimate causing an infinite loop.

 

I wish that I had wolverine like powers of healing

Granted. You have them the way deadpool does, meaning you're in permanent, extreme pain and you're riddled with cancer everywhere.

 

I wish I had a giant zit in the middle of my nose

Granted, it swells bigger and bigger everyday for a week until, when you are talking to an important aqauntance or meeting, it bursts going all over the other person and grossing them out so much they never talk to you again.

 

I wish that I was a physics god.

Granted. You now understand physics better than anyone in the world, but your limbs spontaneously fall off, your eyelids fuse shut and your vocal cords turn to jelly. You can only communicate your great knowledge by wiggling your nose in morse code.

<*The local Djinn turns into a metal can for 24 hours for failing to post a wish.*>

 

 

I wish application developers would always leave the old interface available as an option whenever they wish to introduce a new one, and always maintain both interfaces such that they can access all the same things in their application without problems.  Dropping the work of interface restoration on extension developers, instead of maintaining it on the core application, is way beyond too many levels of wrong.  These ribbon-loaded, Chrome-esque, idiotic interfaces offend me severely, and are utter problems to easy usage... At least for me and my "bells and whistles"-enjoying mind, anyway. :angry:

 

~Mr. D. V. "Firefox shouldn't look like Chrome." Devnull

(Wait until you see the new Firefox right click context menu)

 

Wish granted. All your software now looks like it came straight out of windows 95, and performs like it too. 

 

I wish I could remember to make a wish.

Granted, you remember to make so many wishes the genie staples your mouth shut to stop you wishing.

 

I wish that I had a staple gun.

Granted. You staple sporks mouth shut.

 

I wish I was watching a bad movie.

Granted, it is so bad, but you have to watch it all. Also, longest movie on earth. 30 hours long with only washroom breaks every 2 hours.

 

I wish that I had a perfectly legal(not rule breaking) runescape bot.

mmmmph mmph mmmmph mmph

 

mmmmmmph mmph mmmph mmmmmmmmph

Granted, the staples fly out of your mouth allowing you to speak. Then into your bottom disabling that specific bodily function.

 

I wish that my dog was slighty smarter, although no smarter than a 5 year old.

Granted. Your dog now has the intelligence of a 5 year old. Scientists catch wind of this and seize him for tests, and you never see him again.

 

I wish I had an anti staple shield.

Granted. You block some staples, and it gets stapled to your arm.

 

I wish for good food to eat.

Granted, but some [bleep] decided to poison the Hyper-Decadent, Triple-Fudge, Dark Chocolate Cake on the dessert cart.  Who knows if you tried to take a bite or not? :-w

 

 

I wish had provided a translation alongside this...

mmmmph mmph mmmmph mmph

 

mmmmmmph mmph mmmph mmmmmmmmph

...instead of leaving us to wonder what his muffled words were. :anxious:

 

~D. V. "Call me 'Puzzled' for now." Devnull

Granted, he said, "Granted, but Jagex catches wind and bans you anyway just because they can." He than said, "I wish that my mouth wasn't stapled shut."

 

I wish that Sporks would answer my wish.

Wish granted. But your head explodes because.

 

I wish for a dollar.

Granted, you get exactly one dollar Canadian.

 

I wish that I had some snow.

Granted, but somebody hits you in the face with it, because it's in the form of a snowball. :twss:

 

 

I wish "Kaze no Stigma" had lasted more than just one measly, rushed season. :cry:

 

~D. V. "That show deserved a good hell of a lot more!" Devnull

Granted. It ran 25 seasons. It turns out just like every other 25 season show.

 

I wish for a mid life crisis.

Granted. You gain some important insight into your life, and are able to improve yourself immensely.

 

I wish to never be able to wish again.

Granted, you get extremely bored and since you can't wish vanish from this thread to barely post. Just lurking in the shadows and posting every 3 posts or 24hrs, whichever happens first.

 

I wish that Sporks was able to wish again.