Intelligence Blunders!

[TTanT]

^I thought babies were born by the mother pooping them out.

 

-I believed that Harry Potter was real, and was hoping I wasn't a muggle.

-My vocabulary is hidnered by me forgetting a word until after I need it. "He was a... uhm... when they have multiple personalities..." "No clue what you mean." Conversation moves on, and around five minutes later: "A schizophrenic! That's it!"

-It took me four months to figure out the name of a girl I was crushing on, as every time I was told it, I'd forget. (Now my girlfriend :mrgreen: )

-I once thought someone was another person who I knew. (Who looked quite different.) And only realized it when I mentioned karate lessons to her. (The person I thought she was took them with me.)

 

I'm sure I have more, but....

[Sam]

I used to think that shouting out "POO!" and "PEE!" would get me arrested.

[Zimbu]

My way of going to the grocery store:

1.Take keys form the table

2.Place keys on the hat shelf / chair / floor while putting on shoes and jacket

3.Look for keys while wearing a warm jacket for five to ten minutes

4.Go to the store while sweating like a jogger

 

Also, I thought that Brazilian footballers used their real names until I was 16.

 

I once said "I wonder if those two are somehow related" about identical siblings. For some reason nobody waiting for the mass lecture to start said anything during that two second timespan, so about fifty people including the girls in question heard the remark.

[Romy]

My way of going to the grocery store:

1.Take keys form the table

2.Place keys on the hat shelf / chair / floor while putting on shoes and jacket

3.Look for keys while wearing a warm jacket for five to ten minutes

4.Go to the store while sweating like a jogger

 

Also, I thought that Brazilian footballers used their real names until I was 16.

 

I once said "I wonder if those two are somehow related" about identical siblings. For some reason nobody waiting for the mass lecture to start said anything during that two second timespan, so about fifty people including the girls in question heard the remark.

 

If I were you... I'd just laugh real hard and act as if it was just a joke... :uhh:

[Seraphi]

Ocassionally, I'll be playing my DS at night, and I'll be fairly tired at the same time, then suddenly, I think I've lost it and somehow it got underneath the sofa, so I then take the entire sofa apart and move it, only to realise that it was in my damn hand all along.

[Racheya]

I once panicked because I thought I'd lost my iPod... while listening to it at the time :unsure:

[Romy]

Oh, I remember another one.

 

 

When I was in the 1st grade, my father told my mother he only has 100 NIS. Then at school, my teacher asked me to buy a book (costs approximately 10~ NIS), and I said it's too expensive for us. I was then told the price of the book by my teacher, which is when I answer "Yeah, you go and buy a silly book for 10 NIS when your family only has 100 NIS!"

 

 

:uhh:

[champion]

^I thought babies were born by the mother pooping them out.

I thought babies came out of their mother by ripping a hole through their mom's stomach.

[i_love_burritos]

When I was younger I thought that America and all those other countries "left" of the IDL had an extra day in the week [i didn't really understand the concept of timezones back then]. The extra day was in the weekend so I wanted to stay in America or wherever else, haha.

[Romy]

THIS is where babies come from:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ixoK-94Aqr0

[TTanT]

^I thought babies were born by the mother pooping them out.

I thought babies came out of their mother by ripping a hole through their mom's stomach.

That's a C-section.

[ThurinEthir]

A few weeks ago, I heard some people singing the Star Spangled Banner out of the blue. I turned to my friend and asked, "Huuuuuuh why are they singing Christmas carols in April?"

[champion]

^I thought babies were born by the mother pooping them out.

I thought babies came out of their mother by ripping a hole through their mom's stomach.

That's a C-section.

...true.

[sarg1010]

I once freaked out thinking my Ipod was broken when the volume wouldn't increase as I turned the wheel, until I realized it was locked. :rolleyes:

 

I also asked a Korean-exchange student if she could write in English :oops:. Felt like such a jerk...

[mcneilp]

An ex-work colleague of mine thought Stephen Hawking was "that guy from the reception who comes to lunch with us sometimes".

Not quite...

[The Dark Lord]

Oh, I remember another one.

 

 

When I was in the 1st grade, my father told my mother he only has 100 NIS. Then at school, my teacher asked me to buy a book (costs approximately 10~ NIS), and I said it's too expensive for us. I was then told the price of the book by my teacher, which is when I answer "Yeah, you go and buy a silly book for 10 NIS when your family only has 100 NIS!"

 

 

:uhh:

 

I don't think that most of us understand what an NIS is. :mellow:

 

Also, I used to think that babies came from a woman's anus and she crapped them out during birth. The thought kind of disturbed me when I was younger. Also, I didn't know what a vagina was until age 11 or so. I could go on about how I thought they were structured until I discovered some things for myself, but it would hardly be appropriate.

 

I used to think that all women had "peepees" when I was really young.

[Myweponsg00d]

This one is a little scary, not so funny, but still one of the stupidest things I've done in my life. I used to work at Arby's and it was late at night. It was only me and the manager in the store. These two people came in fully dressed in black with black hoodies on. One of them had a REALLY similar build to one of the employees that worked there, so I thought it was some kind of joke. They started yelling and came after us. The one that I thought was an employee threw me down on the floor and took my cell phone.

 

I was like smiling and stuff, down on the floor with my hands on my head. Then they held a gun to my manager and I finally realized that we were in fact being robbed. And the one that looked like the employee ended up being a woman. I felt [developmentally delayed]ed.

 

Guess you cant be expected to respond well in that situation though.

[Romy]

@ Serephurus, I think it's obvious it's a form of currency. Either way, NIS stands for New Israeli Shekel.

[Saru Inc]

This one is a little scary, not so funny, but still one of the stupidest things I've done in my life. I used to work at Arby's and it was late at night. It was only me and the manager in the store. These two people came in fully dressed in black with black hoodies on. One of them had a REALLY similar build to one of the employees that worked there, so I thought it was some kind of joke. They started yelling and came after us. The one that I thought was an employee threw me down on the floor and took my cell phone.

 

I was like smiling and stuff, down on the floor with my hands on my head. Then they held a gun to my manager and I finally realized that we were in fact being robbed. And the one that looked like the employee ended up being a woman. I felt [developmentally delayed]ed.

 

Guess you cant be expected to respond well in that situation though.

 

Damn :o I wouldn't been like "wtf? don't [bleep]ing push me, I'll write you uppp... o shi-"

[Guest Mrmegakirby]

Wow. That would have been scary once you realised it wasn't a joke.

[fastortoise]

Back in the days when I worked at Subway I'd almost always giggle when someone would walk up to me and ask for a 6 inch.

[i_love_burritos]

Back in the days when I worked at Subway I'd almost always giggle when someone would walk up to me and ask for a 6 inch.

I don't see why that's such a big deal. I'd much rather just give them a nice hot, meaty, footlong with extra ranch dressing.

[Wizz]

I was afraid of bleach because of all the warning labels on the bottle, so I though it had mini machines that eat things through.

[Nero]

-My vocabulary is hidnered by me forgetting a word until after I need it. "He was a... uhm... when they have multiple personalities..." "No clue what you mean." Conversation moves on, and around five minutes later: "A schizophrenic! That's it!"

Just going to point out that schizophrenia isn't when someone has multiple personalities. That's multiple personality disorder (go figure...).

[TTanT]

^So, I've had the wrong definition for 'schizophrenia' in my internal dictionary for ages.

It makes you wonder how many times you've made an arse of yourselff.