Noobs say the funniest things!

[3rkid]

Stereotypical new member with Dragon Longsword, Dragon Plateskirt, Glory, Granite Body, Dragon Med Helm...

 

 

 

This was at Falador guards, I was trying to get a clue scroll when he was killing trying to kill my guards.

 

 

 

[belfordrocks]

In Fist of Guthix, F2P world in the fist centre.

 

 

 

Player: Combat levels?

[70kyews]

I can't remember if it was on here or in the game, but when asked about when to become a member someone said something like the folling:

 

 

 

"Probably when your combat is over 50, and you've done a lot of quests. It can be kind of boring being a member at a low level and you'll get made fun of. I once saw a level 3 member and fell out of my chair because I was laughing so hard"

[Warrior_B666]

 

 

 

atleast I had fun

 

edit: I had an rat pole, was doing varrock diaries

 

 

 

 

 

 

I just love that picture :XD:

[SupportMage]

 

 

 

 

I'm not blacking out her name because at this point I DON'T CARE.

 

 

 

Jesus Christ, two years of this!

[Hermon]

 

 

 

 

I'm not blacking out her name because at this point I DON'T CARE.

 

 

 

Jesus Christ, two years of this!

 

 

 

Ignore list :thumbsup:

[Flamewhisker]

:lol: I love nub storys lol

 

 

 

I had someone message me yesterday, i guess it was kinda funny

 

 

 

noob:Hi

 

Noob: Do you have any accounts i can have?

 

me: who are you

 

noob: *says username*

 

noob: so do you have any accounts i can have?

 

me: I can see that, but how do you know me?

 

noob: we met at clan wars.

 

(I have only ever been to clan wars once, and i was only exploring, so i was just messing with him now)

 

Me: When?

 

noob: I don't remember

 

me: Well do you remember what we did?

 

noob: we were with a clan

 

me: ... umm dude, I Never Go To Clan Wars

 

me: Reported and Ignored!

 

 

 

 

 

Its not the first time i have had someone do that to me. Other things that have happened are people following me around saying can i have 50k (even with the trade limits) asking can they have my lunar/how much is it/where can i buy it.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Dunno how much this story will fit under noob storys (because it was my friend just playing around)

 

but...

 

Friend: Buying girlfriend!

 

other person: I'll sell you mine!

[Josheppe]

 

Dunno how much this story will fit under noob storys (because it was my friend just playing around)

 

but...

 

Friend: Buying girlfriend!

 

other person: I'll sell you mine!

 

:lol: hehe I like this 1 :P

[Randox]

[hide=quote tree]

GF foxeh.

 

Got a an offence for repeating this in Forsaken's chat :wall: WBMs......

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

WBM? Nah. Your just an idiot for restating that. It takes an IQ above 8 to realize that its against the rules to say that...

 

I would have reported you.

 

 

 

wow argon. what a snitch u r. i thought it was funny :lol:

 

 

 

i just dont understand why ppl report this crap. i mean i could understand macroing etc. but not this. wbms :thumbdown:

 

 

 

Ahh, I can't take it anymore!

 

 

 

Fix your god damn spelling and grammar, and get a new freaking avatar that isn't pixelated to Hell and back!

 

 

 

And besides, I would report it too. If people think they can start saying things like that and not get reported or muted, you'll see me turning public chat to friends a lot more. How did you make it over a year and 1500+ posts on TIF without knowing to nawt tlk leik dis!

 

 

 

lol what did i do that was so incorrect? all i did was use r for are and not capitalize the i's.

 

 

 

all i said was that im not a snitch so i dont report those kinds of offenses. it doesnt necessarily mean i use them in game. in fact i have had 0 black marks on all of my accounts ever.

 

 

 

and lighten up buddy, making fun of my avatar is so random lol. otherwise brush up on ur insults and ull do fine :thumbsup:

 

 

 

ps: i actually do plan on changing my avatar and sig. im too lazy now so perhaps in a week or two. idk some time when im not busy

[/hide]

 

Poops on a desk and eats it is not funny. Even to someone who appreciates bathroom humour enough to greatly enjoy Family Guy, that was not funny. Now the part about licking got a psuedo chuckle out of me but thats it.

 

 

 

3rkid, I find it Ironic that you would be complaining about grammer, especialy the use of chatspeak (because of your name not posting habbits), but I agree.

 

all i did was use r for are and not capitalize the i's.

 

Ya, that is what you did wrong. This is not a single line ingame chat, it is a forum. Use grammar and spelling (I'm one to talk about the last one :lol: ), or at least do what I (try to) do and make it look like your trying.

 

 

 

And od fix the avatar sooner rather than later. It looks like it was run through the piixelate feture of Photoshop a few to many times.

 

 

 

On a lighter note, to the picture of the person using melee protect while fighting the ecil chicken, very nice, a true failure.

 

 

 

And to the generaly frutrated people who wish that the remaining 99% of 'scapers could discover the almighty world map THAT FOCUSUS ON YOU PRESENT LOCATION and has the pwer to answer half of all questions ever asked, I feel your pain. After many (5 or 6) years of being asked "how do I get to____?", "where am I?" and "Can you take me to____?", I feel like writing a response that would look like this:

 

"**** you, you stupid ******* moron"

 

"Use the ******* world map and answer your own **** ******* question"

 

Note that I don't remember os stupid and moron are starred, though I suspect moron is. I would probably just use the second line, and so far have limited myself to "use the wold map", but someday...

 

Have I mentioned I have never had a balck mark 8-)

[onedude]

i remember one, but this isnt mine so i cannot take credit. (ill use 'me' to mean the person who said this)

 

 

 

it went something like"

 

 

 

Noob: ill buy those bunny ears.

 

Me: theyre nontradable

 

Noob: how much?

 

Me: you cant trade them

 

Noob: then how can i get them

 

Me: you would have ot build a time machine, go back to last easter, and get them

 

Noob: oh, ok...

 

Noob: how can i go about building this time machine.

 

 

 

:lol: that one had me in stitches!

 

 

 

lol i think that one is quite funny too :lol:

 

 

 

Same

 

Prize idiot :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:

[Cheefoo]

[hide=written out version]One day, I was mining pure essence, then this guy started asking where to get a santa hat. I said that you have to buy one. He wanted to know where else to get them, but I said you can only get them from players, they're discontinued. He asked what "discontinued" meant, and I told him it means you can't get it anymore (besides trading). He asked over and over again, as he didn't understand what it meant still... After a while, he said "I'm only 8 years old," or something. Then he logged out...

 

 

 

He logged back in and said something like, "Hey, this is noob123's father. I hear you've been picking on my son. I'm an ex police officer" I said, no I wasn't, he was just annoying me. Then he started threatening me that he was going to hunt me down in real life. He also said that he could ban me... I reported him for impersonating a moderator. After a while, he started laughing saying, "Hahaha, I'm not 8 or an old guy, you fell for it."

 

 

 

I said, "Well, I still reported you..." He started freaking out like, "It was just a joke, man, I didn't mean it!" He went bipolar and said, "I could hack you whenever I want. *logs out* *logs in* Bam, done, just like that. Your accuont is mine. Then he says "I didn't mean it, I can't do that, let's be friends!"[/hide]

 

 

 

I met this noob at the rune essence mine, M is me, N is the noob.

 

 

 

N:Hey, where can I get santa hat?

 

M:You can only buy them from players.

 

N:Where else can I get?

 

M:Only players, they're discontinued.

 

N:What does discontinued mean?

 

M:It means you can't get it anymore besides trading.

 

N:What does it mean?

 

*begins to spam that line over and over again*

 

M:Please, stop annoying me already... I told you what it meant.

 

*Noob has logged out*

 

*Noob has logged in*

 

N:This is Noob's father, I'm an ex-policeman.

 

M:Okay, good for you.

 

N:My son says you've been bothering him, is this true?

 

M:No, he was just annoying me, and I told him to go away.

 

N:You better not be lying, I can hunt you down any time I want.

 

M:No, I'm not lying...

 

N:I can ban you right now, punk.

 

*reports for moderator impersination*

 

M:No, you can't...

 

N:Let me have a little talk with you...

 

N:Are you straight?

 

M:Did you just ask me if I'm youknowwhat?!

 

N:That's it kid, I'm gonna hunt you down!

 

M:Yeah, I invite you to, you old fart, bring it on!

 

*silence*

 

N:Haha, you really thought I was 8 and an old man? HAHAHA!

 

M:No, I didn't...

 

N:Yes you did, lol!

 

M:You know I reported you...

 

N:What?! WHAT DID YOU REPORT ME FOR?!

 

M:I'm not telling you...

 

N:I was just kidding! No, please!

 

*more silence*

 

N:I can hack you whenever I want.

 

M:Yeah, I doubt that...

 

N:Watch me...

 

*Noob has logged out*

 

*Noob has logged in*

 

N:The second you log out, your account is mine.

 

M:Somehow I doubt that.

 

*even more silence*

 

N:I'm sorry, I didn't mean it...

 

...

 

N:Wanna be friends?

 

*Cheefoo124 has logged out*

[999134]

a bit mean but :twss:

 

 

[3rkid]

3rkid, I find it Ironic that you would be complaining about grammer, especialy the use of chatspeak (because of your name not posting habbits), but I agree.

 

 

 

If you're saying my name is chatspeak, it isn't.

 

 

 

My name means Three Rivers [kid]. Which makes it 3r. 3 = Three R= Rivers.

 

 

 

What did you think I meant? Erkid?

[funion987]

 

Ya, that is what you did wrong. This is not a single line ingame chat, it is a forum. Use grammar and spelling (I'm one to talk about the last one :lol: ), or at least do what I (try to) do and make it look like your trying.

 

Should be:

 

 

 

Yeah, that is what you did wrong. This is not a single-line in-game chat; it is a forum. Use grammar and spelling (I'm one to talk about the last one :lol: ) or at least do what I (try to) do and make it look like you're trying.

 

 

 

=Me being bored.

[faith870]

:lol: I love these boards :thumbsup:

 

 

 

I was at the flesh crawlers the other day and there was a couple of people there with me. There was a Level 102 bagging out a Level 54 or something for having noobish armour. He kept saying that he should go out and get dragon etc, and is a total noob and has no life to take offence by getting teased by someone on a game.

 

 

 

1. Level 54 probably doesnt have the stats to get Dragon armour.

 

2. The 54 had only been playing the game for 2 weeks.

 

3. Anyone who teases someone in a game is the noob

 

 

 

Some people... :shame:

[Tim]

Dear god, 212K views and 190 Pages later its STILL going!

 

 

 

My Story! happened about 3-4 weeks ago now.

 

 

 

 

 

M = Me, A = Anonamys (sp?) and MI = Mod Impersonator

 

 

 

A: Hey, can you turn your private chat on for a moment

 

M: Umm... okay?

 

(5 Seconds Later)

 

(A Logs off)

 

MI: Excuse me, we have reason to belive you are using an account owned by another player

 

MI: we here at jagex will need your Electronic Mail address and your pass' to prevent any

 

MI: further use, please understand.

 

M: ...You do know thats perhaps the lamest attempt of scamming you know.

 

(Reported for Impersonation)

 

M: your using leet to make a mod name, Jagex NEVER asks for your details

 

M: and you just happen to talk to me once some guy asks me to turn on my priv' chat.

 

MI: Sir are you calling us liers? we're very busy at jagex HQ and want this over with fast

 

M:yeah and I want 100m but that isnt happening

 

MI: if you co-operate with us and it is in fact your account and pass' we will reimburst

 

MI: you with 120m.

 

(Reported for Item AND password scamming)

 

M: Uh-huh. and i can perform alchemy by hitting a wall.

 

(Ignored List and Turned Private back to Friends)

 

 

 

-2 weeks later-

 

 

 

(A logs in)

 

M: Oh hi there, im suprised your still playing after that stunt.

 

A: Oh [cabbage] your still on!!

 

(A Logs Off)

 

(I continue to laugh about it for a week)

[BlackDawn]

a bit mean but :twss:

 

 

 

I loled, especially since i know dzi irl :lol:

[Bloodkay]

 

(A logs in)

 

M: Oh hi there, im suprised your still playing after that stunt.

 

A: Oh [cabbage] your still on!!

 

(A Logs Off)

 

 

 

 

I Lol'ed pretty hard at this point xD

[warren211]

Man, I remember the funniest noob I ever met a while ago but forgot to screenie what eh said.

 

 

 

It started in the RSOF rants forum. About a day after the Cold War quest was released. A noob comes on the forum and posts his rant on the quest's title. He said his ancestors were killed in the Cold War and the quest offended him.

 

 

 

Me and a few other forumers spent a while trying to explain how many people actually died in the Cold War and he refused to listen. He insisted that the Cold War killed his ancestors and they were nowhere to be found. Man, that was the funniest rant I've ever had the pleasure of reading. I can't decide whether to use the :lol: or the :wall: smily, so I'll use both. :lol: :wall: .

[Penguinisme]

So this happened two days ago.

 

 

 

Noob: What is your level in Fishing? (used quickchat)

 

Me: My Fishing level is 76. (quickchat)

 

Noob: my fishing is 77 hahahahaha i pwn u

 

 

 

(this noob is level 39)

 

 

 

Noob:yu suxe cuz i got betr fihsing thanu!

 

Me: Why does that matter?

 

Noob: cuz isaid it did!

 

Noob: My Agility level is 1.

 

Noob: My Woodcutting level is 1.

 

 

 

(both quickchat)

 

 

 

Me: I reccommend training them, they're useful.

 

Noob: omfg ignored

 

 

 

This guy was a pure, I wasn't surprised by his attitude.

[Eregion]

I swear we did nothing to instigate this guy, it's all him. :

 

 

 

[BlackDawn]

Pretty simple.

 

 

 

Guy: How do i attach the kebbit [bleep]es to my verac chest?

 

 

 

He was trying to make a bandos plate :wall:

[Lethargick]

Chilling in Draynor bank

 

Noob: want to be my boyfriend?

 

Newb: alright

 

Noob: luv you

 

Newb: Now go make me some supper *****!

 

Me: Lmao

[barbwireboy3]

Lol at above. You better of been messing around ;)

[psvstef]

Lol at above. You better of been messing around ;)

 

 

 

there isn't one above :o haxor! ;)