My friend might kill himself.. what do I do?

[rushrock]

 

I agree with zono about the argument, but I also agree with stan about the acual discussion at hand. Sometimes, being hostile and cruel to the suicidal teen only makes it worse. Comforting words go a long way, but cruel insults don't always work. It could just scar him for the rest of his life. :(

 

 

 

And one could just as easily scar him by offering sympathy where none is needed. The fact is that you have to consider what the kid actually needs, rather than what he wants.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Also, it would be good to remember that he's probably not even suicidal, according to Hock. I will take his word for it, since he seems to have known this person for long enough to make that sort of judgment.

 

 

 

True. You do make good points. But you should remember the worst case scenario - that he could really be suicidal and depressed. Maybe it's more for attention than sorrow, but without comfort, he might just go ahead and do it, and nobody wants that.

[warri0r45]

sorry to be harsh, i wouldnt want to be in your position and i hope it works out and all, but has your friend ever watched the news? there are alot of people out there going through harsher [cabbage] than your friend.

[____]

You sir, are sick. This is a rather serious matter thats being disscussed and you crack a joke. I hope you feel cool Fonz..

If it were up to me I'd push him down the stairs (guy wanting to kill himself) taste of failure generally make sure they get it right the next time.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Honestly though, tell his folk. If he does end up trying at least they knew it was coming and can't just be "this was so unexpected". After that, dunno. If he's doing it for kicks and seeking attention then see the above suggestion.

[FuBai]

Ignore this post.

[deloriagod]

He has everything he wants too. A nice house, rich family, a great girlfriend, it's his stupid attitude that he walks around with. A big "[bleep] you" to the world. :notalk:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Money can't buy happiness. I know from experience that the thousands of dollars worth of video games surrounding me can only keep me happy for so long. Maybe his relationship with his girlfriend is a problem. Fighting can really take a toll on someone even if they make up afterwards. Whether he likes it or not, he should spend some time away from her if they fight often.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Del's a boy?! I'm sorry, don't mean to offend.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

None taken. I seem to be quite femanine online, not so much in real life.. :-k

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"Go on, be miserable. Just don't make anyone else feel like crap about it."

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

That's actually how I live my life. I feel miserable on the inside but every day I put on a happy face and make everyone around me as happy as I can. No need to have others sad just because I'm not feeling the best.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

As I've read through this topic it seems to me this is just your friend's cry for attention. No, I'm not saying you should rule out the possibility that he is suicidal but it doesn't seem like he really wants to commit suicide. I still thinking going to an adult would help. If it is just a cry for attention, he'll hate the time he'll spend with a psycologist.

[rushrock]

 

He has everything he wants too. A nice house, rich family, a great girlfriend, it's his stupid attitude that he walks around with. A big "[bleep] you" to the world. :notalk:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Money can't buy happiness. I know from experience that the thousands of dollars worth of video games surrounding me can only keep me happy for so long. Maybe his relationship with his girlfriend is a problem. Fighting can really take a toll on someone even if they make up afterwards. Whether he likes it or not, he should spend some time away from her if they fight often.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Del's a boy?! I'm sorry, don't mean to offend.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

None taken. I seem to be quite femanine online, not so much in real life.. :-k

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

"Go on, be miserable. Just don't make anyone else feel like crap about it."

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

That's actually how I live my life. I feel miserable on the inside but every day I put on a happy face and make everyone around me as happy as I can. No need to have others sad just because I'm not feeling the best.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

As I've read through this topic it seems to me this is just your friend's cry for attention. No, I'm not saying you should rule out the possibility that he is suicidal but it doesn't seem like he really wants to commit suicide. I still thinking going to an adult would help. If it is just a cry for attention, he'll hate the time he'll spend with a psycologist.

 

 

 

Yes, he should get some adult help, like a psycologist, and people should also refrain from insulting him - that's not the answer. Even if it is a cry for attention, insults will only make it worse. Some people may think he'll get what he wants, but that's his fault. He needs to be looked after so he doesn't do anything drastic.

[smoressoccer]

contrary to what you might think/believe

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

as much [cabbage] as hes going through

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

hes just whoring for attention by posting on his blog (i know, cause i do it too)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

so just ignore him and let the kid deal with his life on his own. lifes not just tough for him but tough on all of us. the more sympathy you give him the more he'll become accustomed to it and he'll just expect more and more and just get worse. im not saying it's a bad thing to be there for him, because it isn't; having the support of your friends is a good feeling. but that's not going to help him with his problems. the only way hes gonna get through them is if he takes the bull by teh horns

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

and the [bleep]ing gets kinda redundant after a while.

[Notorious_Ice]

This probably will come across as harsh, but I have had plenty of experience with stuff like this. Quite a few of my friends have been through this and its always the same.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I didn't read through most of the posts because they seem to be the same thing over and over: either give him comfort/talk to someone or he is doing it for attention.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Though I agree with Tigra, I really doubt he will actually do it, the most he will do are a couple half hearted attempts which are guarenteed not to work. I would ignore the cuts, don't even let him know you know about them. Unless they are obviously deep enough to near kill him then don't worry about them, because chances are theres nothing you can do to make him stop anyway.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Don't try to 'comfort him' Im not saying don't be a good friend, be there for him but don't give him attention ('don't do it' etc) but theres so much rubbish a good friend can put up with. If you give him the attention he wants, then he will do it more. Because it works. He just needs time to get over his little 'phase' It might take a few months, it might take a year. But eventually I can guarentee that he will look back and think to himself: "What the hell was I doing?"

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Also, although I do not know your friend, from what you have mentioned, and from past experiences, it sounds like he will make up stuff to make you feel sorry for him, to the point in that he almost believes it himself. If you catch him at a lie then point it out, if you think he might be lying but don't know for sure then its probably best just to go along with it; if you tell him you think he is making stuff up then thats another excuse for him to feel sorry for himself.

[anonymous1234]

To be honest it sounds like strong depression of a sort - self harm, irritablitly, feeling sad or "blue" etc. Get him to see a doctor is the best advice I can give. Then they will probably arrange a counsellor or a pshychiatrist. However, I am neither and I have reason to be baised at the moment, so it may just be attention seeking perhaps. I'm not sure.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Tell his parents. Now, now, now, now, NOW! If he really objects to that, tell your school's counsellor. They can talk with him and refer him COMPLETELY ANONYMOUSLY!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Trust me, don't keep it a secret! Tell his parents, or a counselor now! Don't talk with his girl! You are not a professional! Please, oh please get this information to a higher authority!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

*I have dealt with attempted suicides several times in the past, and I get paid to deal with it now...trust me.*

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I would advise you not to tell his parents. but persude HIM to tell his parents, otherwise you will have betrayed his trust. Talk to him more, and show concern, and that you want to seem him better. Whilst Barihawk may be a counsellor or something...my experience is from the otherside of the fence, shall we say?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

you can't have trust with somebody who is dead anyway moron. what you do is tell 1 or more of the following: his parents, your parents, counseller, religious figure, or any trusted adult!!!

[apinagez]

A new rule should be immediately added:

 

 

 

"Bumps on suicidal threads will result on reckless bannings"

[deloriagod]

you can't have trust with somebody who is dead anyway moron. what you do is tell 1 or more of the following: his parents, your parents, counseller, religious figure, or any trusted adult!!!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Thank you very much for bumping an old topic to say things (in quite a rude manor) that have already been said. I know it's winter break but there's no reason to ditch your intelligence because of that.. :roll:

[deloriagod]

A new rule should be immediately added:

 

 

 

"Bumps on suicidal threads will result on reckless bannings"

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

How about bumping any thread that's been dead for a month or more deserves a ban..

[anonymous1234]

omg i didn't realize this was an old thread, really sorry guys.

[fakeitormakeit]

1.Talk to him, it really helps.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

2. If that hasn't helped consider telling his parents.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

btw it was already bumped up, so why not post? lol

[dangeresque]

couldn't you have just got advice by reading the other 5 million suicidal posts.... :?:

[hockEynfish]

Heh, this got bumped?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Anyway, it's been quite a few weeks later. He hasn't committed suicide. He's still a spoiled little jerk who doesn't have problems big enough to commit suicide over. Him and his girlfriend still fight. Same old blah...

[Youaretheman]

 

you can't have trust with somebody who is dead anyway moron. what you do is tell 1 or more of the following: his parents, your parents, counseller, religious figure, or any trusted adult!!!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Thank you very much for bumping an old topic to say things (in quite a rude manor) that have already been said. I know it's winter break but there's no reason to ditch your intelligence because of that.. :roll:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Run4runes..You deserve like...500 slaps. :roll:

[Flyingkami00]

 

Well, even if he is doing it for attention, should we not comfort him? Offer him comforting words?

 

 

 

That works in the short term, sure.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

However, it has this bad side-effect of leading him on to believe that if he wants a jolly little ego boost, he can always have a hissy fit and say he's going to kill himself.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Hell, the few people who got me out of depression didn't do it by saying nice things and fluffy comforting words. They did it by making me feel like absolute crap, and giving a healthy dose of things to think about on the side.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The best thing to do would be to show him that these cries for attention won't get him anywhere. If he wants people to like him, he's got to be likable, not some depressing little sot who's always whinging about something despite not actually having any problems.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

well obviously while your out of a depression you are insanely bitter with a I dont care attitude!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Oh, and del, its because of ur avatar, no other reason. People online identify people with that. Heck, im starting to think wakka's a big fat guy with a hairy chest who doesnt like to wear shirts!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Back on topic: does he smoke? he could hide this from most people and drugs can often lead to suicidal behaivor. Maybe steroids or pot?

[hockEynfish]

 

 

Well, even if he is doing it for attention, should we not comfort him? Offer him comforting words?

 

 

 

That works in the short term, sure.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

However, it has this bad side-effect of leading him on to believe that if he wants a jolly little ego boost, he can always have a hissy fit and say he's going to kill himself.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Hell, the few people who got me out of depression didn't do it by saying nice things and fluffy comforting words. They did it by making me feel like absolute crap, and giving a healthy dose of things to think about on the side.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The best thing to do would be to show him that these cries for attention won't get him anywhere. If he wants people to like him, he's got to be likable, not some depressing little sot who's always whinging about something despite not actually having any problems.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

well obviously while your out of a depression you are insanely bitter with a I dont care attitude!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Oh, and del, its because of ur avatar, no other reason. People online identify people with that. Heck, im starting to think wakka's a big fat guy with a hairy chest who doesnt like to wear shirts!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Back on topic: does he smoke? he could hide this from most people and drugs can often lead to suicidal behaivor. Maybe steroids or pot?

 

 

 

Yeah he smokes pot sometimes. =/

[blindboy]

 

 

 

Yeah he smokes pot sometimes. =/

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

:shame: did u try to stop that?

[Keep_It_Real]

I rember something my health teach said, never take away the wepon that they are going to use, it makes them more mad.

[limpbizkit]

I don't know where else to go for help at this time, because I need it right now, so let me just give you a brief explanation..

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

My friend is 15, he's been going out with his girlfriend for 7 months, and he believes that this girl is totally going to be "his one and only love forever." They always always fight over things, but then the girl can make things right instantly just because my friend really loves her, right?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

So he believes he's the one causing all the fights, and yeah. I don't know, he wrote this really long thing in a blog about how he should just continue to shut out everyone in the world b/c it wouldn't make a difference and then says that he needs us as his friends, when we're all ALWAYS here for him. He cuts himself, he goes around unhappy most of the time, he's an angry guy too.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

But still, he's a great guy down inside... and he's helped me with alot of things... :cry:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Please don't suggest suicide hotlines either :|

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

erm yeah...i know how it fells to be suicide...and tbh that sounds like attention seeking (no offense)

 

 

 

hes on a 1 way ticket to hell if he is smoking pot hes doing what some1 i know is self destruction...maybe he should end it with her...or something

[indy500fan]

 

 

 

 

Yeah he smokes pot sometimes. =/

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

:shame: did u try to stop that?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Was it really worth bumping a month old thread just to say that?

[wakka102]

I'd really just like to say let him, but if not that then don't do anything drastic. For example, I had a friend who was suicidal and another of my friends called the cops, told his parents, called his pastor, I mean called every freaken person he knew. Now everybody watches him (the suicidal guy) all the time, his parents make him take medication, everybody at our school knows it and his social life has gone down the tubes and he doesn't want to be friends with anybody any more. The worst part is, I get the feeling he's probably going to get over it in a year or two and when he does he's practically screwed until he moves somewhere since everybody that knows him has it implanted in their heads that he's some kind of freak. I can't tell you exactly what to do but whatever it is try to work it out with as few people as possible.

I agree with this, if you tell lots of people its going to make things worse, not better. If I was already suicidal and then EVERYBODY knew I was suicidal, that would just make me wanna kill myself even more. Definitly not the best route to go.

[Rebdragon]

That's actually how I live my life. I feel miserable on the inside but every day I put on a happy face and make everyone around me as happy as I can. No need to have others sad just because I'm not feeling the best.

 

 

 

That's kind of like how I feel. I don't feel too bad (more bored with my life than sad), but I'm not the kind of guy who smiles all the time either. It's not really a huge problem for me, so why make anyone worry?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

As I've read through this topic it seems to me this is just your friend's cry for attention. No, I'm not saying you should rule out the possibility that he is suicidal but it doesn't seem like he really wants to commit suicide. I still thinking going to an adult would help. If it is just a cry for attention, he'll hate the time he'll spend with a psycologist.

 

 

 

Dear God, I went to therapy two years ago when I was feeling the most miserable I've ever been, it was so annoying. Turned out that the drugs and advice my psychologist gave me didn't help at all, and I got out of it on my own later after school soccer and first quarter were over (that was some intense amount of work and lack of free time).

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Though, it is true that my seratonin levels are low :-k .