TTanT

Timothy awakens, and finds he ahs no clue what is going on. Staff in hand, he trundles randomly through the dungeon. (I'd like to remind you all that I am currently around 400lbs in weight (most of which is fat). I don't run.)

One of my kids takes a poopie in Mather. I hope it is near his 'face'.

The wolf is enchanted with the spell 'I bite through dis'. It can now bite through almost anything. Including kevlar. ((Jeez, I have to spell out my attacks like a legal form. I figured you'd egt the point that a giant magical wolf amde of ice isn't an ordinary animal.)) The wolf grows ice spines from its back. These spines grow very quickly. By that I mean they grow in a period of time similar to what it takes you to blink.. Sitting on its back is now impossible. Said spines can easily rip kevlar to pieces like construction paper, as they are enchanted like the rest of the wolf is. The wolf then howls and all of the heat in the area around you disappears. ((The temperature is cold enough where your breath can freaking see you. So don't use warm clothing as a defence.))

I run down Mather's halls with a thermonuclear bomb the size of a car.* *I use the word run in the loosest sense ehre. Also, the kiddies are helping me transport it. If Matehr attacks me, I'll set it off. If he ignores me, well, I don't even know what I'm going to do, yet.

Are you saying that all people who enjoy living lives that are comfortless drink black coffee? Because that is quite an assumption to make.

I'm talking about the Oedipus Complex, as theorised by Freud, not the Greek myth/play from which he got the name. I was (jokingly) suggesting that he liked his father better because he had overcome his desire for his mother, and instead focused his attention to his father in the hope that he may be able to find a sexual partner of his own. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mScdJURKGWM

Speaking from a strictly strategical point of view: Get with her friend, break contact with her for a while, come back and start being aloof but dhv aggressively, break up with the girl when you know the girl likes you (which you probably won't unless she tells you, which she probably won't - no offense) and go from there. That's the how, I personally wouldn't worry about it, especially without the experience. Meet her friend, you might like her. Keep the experimenting and dice rolling to cold approaches. To be honest, I'm not that desperate. If she really wanst to end it, I think I'll manage. And if the friend she's talking about is who I believe it is, then I already do have feelings for her (my blasted hormones don't understand that I can only have one partner at a time). So, I guess what I'm saying is that I don't want the relationship to end on the basis of a misunderstanding, which is why I'll talk to her, but if she truely wants it to end, I'm fine with that, too. Does that make any sense whatsoever?

Well, I have to admit that I don't think we ever had any 'sexual tension'. I mean, we barely held hands, and never had kissed. But it still leaves the question, should I try to save the relationship? I'm thinking I'll make sure this is what she wants, and if so, accept it. Or would that be going too far? As you can guess, I'm fairly inexperienced with such things, having only recently bloomed socially.

I have a seemingly permanent stuffy nose, so I can't smell either. You aren't alone. On to my newest problem: Ok, guys. I just got this note, and was hoping you could help me interpret it. It's from my girlfriend, and is obviously a break-up note, but a second, third, and twentieth opinion always helps. [hide=The Note] I really don't think this is working the way it should be. I have too much going on right now, and I think it's unfair for you. We've barely hung out, and it's my fault. I'm never home anymore. I really enjoy our friendship and I would like to continue talking. But for now, I think that's all our relationship should be. I know this is really quick, and it's king of wrong for me to do this, but I know someone that likes you, that can give you more attention that I can. I think you know who I'm talking about. [i edited it slightly, but that was just a few commas I felt were needed.] [/hide] Now, some background information. The relationship was started by me asking her out, but she lead me to it in such a way that it might have well been the other way around. It is true we haven't hanged out much, due to first me getting sick, then her. And then her losing her home phone (she doesn't have a cell phone), which, due to the fact that she rarely is online, destroyed our ability to get in touch outside of school. She also has a lot of stuff going on in school. Especially by her English teacher, who is (and this opinion is held by most of the school) still not entirely over the mood swings of puberty. The teacher and her have been getting into arguments, and she was brought to tears on the last day before Winter Break by an action of the teacher's. (I figure going into the specifics is unecessary.) I can't say I was the best moral support then, as I'm only good at consoling people if I have time to prepare myself first. I did purposefully trip over a street curb to lighten her modd, but she wouldn't know that that wasn't an accident. Really, I only have two questions. Firstly, is this just an excuse to get out of the relationship, or does she really believe this, and can the relationship be saved? And the second question is how I 'know' who this mystery person who likes me is. At the very least I can use this information as blackmai- er, to avoid causing the person any pain/jealousy or inadvertently leading them on. I have a hunch, but guessing wrong isn't so nice. Especially if I structure my behavior around it. (And yes, I realize that, short of asking the person, a hunch is my only real way of finding out, but I still felt I should ask.) So, I'm sorry for the wall of text, and if you need a name to use for expedience, we'll try "Saumedi," as that is a fun name. ----- I had to save this onto notepad because my internet failed just as I finished typing it....

Timothy rolls over and examines the bench statue.

Timothy Taggerung, Human, age 29. Black hair and brown eyes, has more flab than ab. About 6'4" and 529.2lbs. Current weapon: Staff I'll lose weight when I can get a weapon I like more. I sit on the park bench statue. It makes cracking noises. I then fall asleep on said bench.

...What...? The fires were on the kids from my trenchcoat, ebcause they spontaneously combusted a few pages ago. Anyways, I was putting the fires out. The fondling lightswitches was just for the laughs and to get your attention. I pull out a cage that has a replica of Hex in it. The replica is naked. It runs through your halls, disgracing them.

I turn into liquid, but keep the manacles for no real reason. I then craft a large wolf made entirely of ice and water, which comes to life and attacks Mather. ((I'm basically playing as the wold-thing now, as my main cahracter is sitting around and doing nothing. So no autohitting. Attacking me would relinquish my control over the wolf and make it a normal minion, though.))

((And what if they're an amorphous blob with no feet?)) ((Then you form your blobbishness into feet and fight with those.)) Large ice spikes pop out of my feet. I then begin kicking like a maniac. "I have a serious case of cold feet." I smirk. "So serious, as a matter of fact, that it'll make you blobishness solid enough for me to shatter!" I then begin kicking Octos in his blob.

I put out the fires on my kiddies, and then walk into Mather. I then begin fondling lightswitches.

The children in my coat pull out fire arms. They then catch alight and run around, screaming.

In one step, and only one step, link agility to smithing. If it's an unlimited amount of steps, it's effortless. Cats are supernovas. How? Cats are animals. Animals require nourishment. Nourishment is energy. Energy is in supernovas. Cats are related to supernovas.

Last skill was good and sailing rumors have been squashed, so I have high hopes. The RSOF tells me that this will be the new skill. For those of you who are afraid of links, here's the quickfind code: 16-17-348-58687481

The Kraken joins the fun. Also Sasquatch, and the Boogeyman.

Gozilla appears.

I laugh.

Cthulhu gets hit by the Moon. Congratulations, you've pissed him off.

Oh, Buzzy, I kind of inteded that accusation to be frivolous. After all, look at this game. He gave me control. Anyways, I never said sacrificing him would kill him. You assumed that. But I do hold him hostage. He's asleep and inside my trenchcoat. Also, no-one complained when I used him as a shield earlier. Cthulhu eats the walls, attacks you, and smacks me with a tentacle, sending me to Florida. I start wrestling with Alligators.

We don't serve your kind here. Says the kid who's RS status says "p2p" :roll: Did I ever claim to be fair?

We will realize the Chinese have been injecting thermite into our food, out toys, everything. We will then burn. [if any Chinese folks were offended by this statement, then I'd like to say that they will get their revenge on 2012.]