Thanks for the tips guys. Good ol' OT

 

I am getting really ticked about my school life now. See, i used to live in a small town in Canada till i was 10, just before my dating years. I had good friends, good life, good times. Then, suddenly im ripped out and sent away to the carribean for 2 years.

 

Work, ya know? I made friends, then we moved back. I arrived in another small town in Canada, but i had missed probably the most important social years of my life- Grade 5 and 6. suddenly, i was interested in girls, and i had lived in a island with about 1000 people. I was the only kid in my grade! Remember those times when you first started getting into girls? now imagine going through that again- as the new kid, with no good social expereince. I didnt even know what rasism meant! It was kinda like i took one hell of an oversized vacation -.-

 

So i think what i need is some pointers. The 'rights and wrongs' of dating. I really want to try, even if it does end in the dreaded friends.

 

But thats one more friend than i have now, right?

 

If anyone knows a site, a post on this topic, or wants to just type stuff out, ill thank you for it.

And no-one tell me to go look at IOI. Their about as usless as a slinky. Cool, but really useless. for me at least.

 

BTw, ill say it once more, just for lent--ASPERGERS SYNDROMi haz

Thanks for the tips guys. Good ol' OT

 

I am getting really ticked about my school life now. See, i used to live in a small town in Canada till i was 10, just before my dating years. I had good friends, good life, good times. Then, suddenly im ripped out and sent away to the carribean for 2 years.

 

Work, ya know? I made friends, then we moved back. I arrived in another small town in Canada, but i had missed probably the most important social years of my life- Grade 5 and 6. suddenly, i was interested in girls, and i had lived in a island with about 1000 people. I was the only kid in my grade! Remember those times when you first started getting into girls? now imagine going through that again- as the new kid, with no good social expereince. I didnt even know what rasism meant! It was kinda like i took one hell of an oversized vacation -.-

 

So i think what i need is some pointers. The 'rights and wrongs' of dating. I really want to try, even if it does end in the dreaded friends.

 

But thats one more friend than i have now, right?

 

If anyone knows a site, a post on this topic, or wants to just type stuff out, ill thank you for it.

And no-one tell me to go look at IOI. Their about as usless as a slinky. Cool, but really useless. for me at least.

 

BTw, ill say it once more, just for lent--ASPERGERS SYNDROMi haz

Anything you want to know specifically? I wouldn't say 5th and 6th are that important, compared to 7,8,9th.

Aspergers, [bleep] it. If you keep thinking of yourself as someone who won't do as well socially because you have aspergers, you won't do well socially. Don't worry about that.

IOI's are important. If a girl keeps staring at you in class, or some other sign when she's talking to you, you sure as hell should be looking for that.

 

There are no right's and wrong's of dating really, but if you ask specific question we can probably help.

Some girl was staring at me all class the other day in french class, but I know why, she liked my shirt, I heard her saying something about it later that day.

Thanks for the tips guys. Good ol' OT

 

I am getting really ticked about my school life now. See, i used to live in a small town in Canada till i was 10, just before my dating years. I had good friends, good life, good times. Then, suddenly im ripped out and sent away to the carribean for 2 years.

 

Work, ya know? I made friends, then we moved back. I arrived in another small town in Canada, but i had missed probably the most important social years of my life- Grade 5 and 6. suddenly, i was interested in girls, and i had lived in a island with about 1000 people. I was the only kid in my grade! Remember those times when you first started getting into girls? now imagine going through that again- as the new kid, with no good social expereince. I didnt even know what rasism meant! It was kinda like i took one hell of an oversized vacation -.-

 

So i think what i need is some pointers. The 'rights and wrongs' of dating. I really want to try, even if it does end in the dreaded friends.

 

But thats one more friend than i have now, right?

 

If anyone knows a site, a post on this topic, or wants to just type stuff out, ill thank you for it.

And no-one tell me to go look at IOI. Their about as usless as a slinky. Cool, but really useless. for me at least.

 

BTw, ill say it once more, just for lent--ASPERGERS SYNDROMi haz

 

Do you know what (an) 'IOI' is? It's a noun, it stands for indicator of interest...perhaps you're talking about The Game, or something. Anyway, it is very useful, if you know how to use it (I haven't read it, but I know it is quite more useful than a slinky...just look at Lent, he can haz massive success...?). Anyway, look at iamdan's stuff...he's got a nice collection of advice scattered around this thread. But the most important thing is experience. You can read up as much as you want on the internet about dating but you can't really 'get it' until you go out and starting flirting and stuff. If you screw up; that's awesome...you can learn what's right and wrong the natural that we all have. Plus, you'll know how to execute it later, with body language and stuff. It doesn't have to be anyone you know, or 'awkward'. Just go join some clubs or something and mingle with peeps.

hmmm....

Well, for me, 5-6 seemed to be the point were everyone figured out how to get a date. I was left in the dust, or, should i say the salt water of the carribean :P

Dont worry, i dont let aspergers get in the way. I like to think the only thing it does now is makes me smarter.

I have never once studied, and im still a A average student.

IOI, still meh. If a girl is lookin at you, its seems pretty easy to find, right?

Specifics.... specifics....

Ill get back to you guys on that.

Still, thanks for the help.

hmmm....

Well, for me, 5-6 seemed to be the point were everyone figured out how to get a date. I was left in the dust, or, should i say the salt water of the carribean :P

Dont worry, i dont let aspergers get in the way. I like to think the only thing it does now is makes me smarter.

I have never once studied, and im still a A average student.

IOI, still meh. If a girl is lookin at you, its seems pretty easy to find, right?

Specifics.... specifics....

Ill get back to you guys on that.

Still, thanks for the help.

Well, there's other stuff too. I can't say I know most of them, since I do them subconsciously. Here are some tips though.

 

If a girl is talking to you, and is adjusting her appearance in some way, like playing with her hair there is a good chance she's interested.

 

If a girl talks to you about a dance, unless they say their going with someone, there is a good chance they're hinting at something. Especially if they mention that someone asked them but they said no.

Some girl was staring at me all class the other day in french class, but I know why, she liked my shirt, I heard her saying something about it later that day.

 

 

She wants your [bleep] in or around her mouth.

 

Now, I usually am one for ignoring/reporting trolls on this thread, but boyzloveme actually had a valid point with her(?) post. if a girl gives you her number or screen name, it is in the intent that you use it to actually contact her at some point. Don't act shy sayin' "Oh, i don't know if I should talk to her, it seems awkward". No. She gave you her number, she wants to converse with you. Do it.

 

Same applies for a date (to field one of Alexpop's questions).

If you get a girl to go on a date with you, she's already said yes. There's no reason to be awkward or nervous. And don't think twice about kissing her on the first date. Do it. Don't think. Act. If she agreed to go out wit hyou, she's already accepted the fact that you'll probably kiss her. She probably wants you to.

hmmm....

Well, for me, 5-6 seemed to be the point were everyone figured out how to get a date. I was left in the dust, or, should i say the salt water of the carribean :P

Dont worry, i dont let aspergers get in the way. I like to think the only thing it does now is makes me smarter.

I have never once studied, and im still a A average student.

IOI, still meh. If a girl is lookin at you, its seems pretty easy to find, right?

Specifics.... specifics....

Ill get back to you guys on that.

Still, thanks for the help.

Just curious, how old are you?

Wow.

Two random, but so ridiculously helpfull posts.

For Istolethepie, im in grade 9, 14 years of age.

....and dont go stalking me now :ohnoes:

 

....

 

 

.....

 

 

 

......

 

 

 

........I love OT

Some girl was staring at me all class the other day in french class, but I know why, she liked my shirt, I heard her saying something about it later that day.

 

 

She wants your [bleep] in or around her mouth.

I wish, she's insanely [bleep]ing hot. like, damn.

I think us ot'ers should compile a list of things that you could consider as IOI's.

Alexpop, just 'cause I asked how old you were doesn't mean I am planning on following you against your will. :wink:

 

I was just kind of surprised by you saying grades 5 and 6 were the most important social years for you and your peers. Nothing really interesting happened at my school during those years, so I just wanted to know where your perspective was coming from.

Some girl was staring at me all class the other day in french class, but I know why, she liked my shirt, I heard her saying something about it later that day.

 

 

She wants your [bleep] in or around her mouth.

I wish, she's insanely [bleep]ing hot. like, damn.

I think us ot'ers should compile a list of things that you could consider as IOI's.

 

 

pics?

 

haha, I jest.

 

A list of IOI's would be damn near impossible to compile. If it were possible, it'd have been created by now. And the creator would be a billionaire. God life would be easy with a list like that.

 

IOI's vary from girl to girl. Drastically. Yes there's some common ones, but girls are friggin' complicated. The only thing they have in common with each other is their gender.

 

 

Some girl was staring at me all class the other day in french class, but I know why, she liked my shirt, I heard her saying something about it later that day.

 

 

She wants your [bleep] in or around her mouth.

I wish, she's insanely [bleep]ing hot. like, damn.

I think us ot'ers should compile a list of things that you could consider as IOI's.

 

 

pics?

 

haha, I jest.

 

A list of IOI's would be damn near impossible to compile. If it were possible, it'd have been created by now. And the creator would be a billionaire. God life would be easy with a list like that.

 

IOI's vary from girl to girl. Drastically. Yes there's some common ones, but girls are friggin' complicated. The only thing they have in common with each other is their gender.

So are guys. We're not a different species or anything.

I know, eh?

 

I left for two years, and when i get back the first thing i see is the sudden couples all over the place.

 

I dont think that it was that important, but i missed the first little bits of the dating ages.

 

It would be like trying to read a complex 600 page book, but skiping the first 75 pages.

 

Your kinda lost on it, but you'll find out whats going on eventually.

 

I like what i just did there....

Really just about anything can be considered an IOI depending on inflection, body language, stuff like that. There are just some that should instantly make you know "hey this girl/guy is into me" (for you girls: guy's IOI's are pretty much unnecessary for you. we're generally very obvious and not subtle).

Really just about anything can be considered an IOI depending on inflection, body language, stuff like that. There are just some that should instantly make you know "hey this girl/guy is into me" (for you girls: guy's IOI's are pretty much unnecessary for you. we're generally very obvious and not subtle).

The only trouble I've had is if there's a guy who flirts with everyone. Then I can't tell whether they're genuinely interested or not.

Really just about anything can be considered an IOI depending on inflection, body language, stuff like that. There are just some that should instantly make you know "hey this girl/guy is into me" (for you girls: guy's IOI's are pretty much unnecessary for you. we're generally very obvious and not subtle).

 

 

My method is being subtle at first, and then if I'm displeased with the results, I move to the direct approach.

 

"Hey, wanna hook up?"

(not really, it's more of a sensitive I like you kind of thing)

Really just about anything can be considered an IOI depending on inflection, body language, stuff like that. There are just some that should instantly make you know "hey this girl/guy is into me" (for you girls: guy's IOI's are pretty much unnecessary for you. we're generally very obvious and not subtle).

The only trouble I've had is if there's a guy who flirts with everyone. Then I can't tell whether they're genuinely interested or not.

Try and be more attentive on him. I flirt a lot for s'n'gs, but I can tell if a girl genuinely is interested. Odds are, the guy that's comfortable enough around women to constantly flirt is pretty good at picking up on that too. Standing really close to him, touching him a lot, those are two of the biggest things I notice.

 

That hey wanna hook up thing is a lot cooler, honestly, rpg. You should buy a leather or at least denim jacket to wear whenever you say that. Then, before she answers, light up a cigarette and take a drag. Yeeeeeeeah.

Really just about anything can be considered an IOI depending on inflection, body language, stuff like that. There are just some that should instantly make you know "hey this girl/guy is into me" (for you girls: guy's IOI's are pretty much unnecessary for you. we're generally very obvious and not subtle).

The only trouble I've had is if there's a guy who flirts with everyone. Then I can't tell whether they're genuinely interested or not.

Try and be more attentive on him. I flirt a lot for s'n'gs, but I can tell if a girl genuinely is interested. Odds are, the guy that's comfortable enough around women to constantly flirt is pretty good at picking up on that too. Standing really close to him, touching him a lot, those are two of the biggest things I notice.

 

That hey wanna hook up thing is a lot cooler, honestly, rpg. You should buy a leather or at least denim jacket to wear whenever you say that. Then, before she answers, light up a cigarette and take a drag. Yeeeeeeeah.

I usually have to watch how they act with other girls, figure out if they acted differently with me. But I have don't really worry about that anymore, since I'm going out with someone.

Really just about anything can be considered an IOI depending on inflection, body language, stuff like that. There are just some that should instantly make you know "hey this girl/guy is into me" (for you girls: guy's IOI's are pretty much unnecessary for you. we're generally very obvious and not subtle).

The only trouble I've had is if there's a guy who flirts with everyone. Then I can't tell whether they're genuinely interested or not.

Try and be more attentive on him. I flirt a lot for s'n'gs, but I can tell if a girl genuinely is interested. Odds are, the guy that's comfortable enough around women to constantly flirt is pretty good at picking up on that too. Standing really close to him, touching him a lot, those are two of the biggest things I notice.

 

That hey wanna hook up thing is a lot cooler, honestly, rpg. You should buy a leather or at least denim jacket to wear whenever you say that. Then, before she answers, light up a cigarette and take a drag. Yeeeeeeeah.

 

Cool as it may be, in my general environment (my school) the "inside joke" of late is asking anyone and everyone you don't know if they want to "hook up" regardless of gender, relationship status, and physical distance.

 

It's quite funny when done across the room to the kid no one talks to.

 

But I suppose in a real environment it could have some actual effect. I don't think you'd get to many yeses though. Then again, I've never tried.

I think us ot'ers should compile a list of things that you could consider as IOI's.

 

The thing is, you don't need a list. I'm at the point where I don't even consciously look for IOIs other than with my compliance tests, I just have intuition. (I'm guessing my subconscious looks for them for me)

 

All you really have to do is get some basic knowledge on body language and psychology and you can start evaluating gestures people make. Then you can start making your own compliance tests to look for IOIs as well as having your intuition. It's honestly not anywhere near as hard as it sounds.

 

Remember the golden rule of looking for clusters. If she has her arms crossed don't assume she's trying to avoid you, maybe she's just cold. Maybe she also has her feet and head pointed towards you and is learning forward.

 

Then you can start push pulling with your own body language, use it to change their body language and thus their mood and attitude towards you. I can't say I'm great at this, but it's fun to practice and see results.

In fact, you aren't asking her to go out with her. You're telling her that she is going out with you Friday. I was thinking, the term "asking out" sounds pathetic and unmanly. Telling a girl that you're going out, however, is guaranteed to put hair on your chest.

Lent, seriously, how old are you?

 

Oh, btw, new advice for yall. Never go to an Ivy League school. The girls are for the most part ugly prudes who like to think highly of themselves because they're in the one environment of their lives where they're no more ugly than the next girl. I am in no way exagerating.

 

Seriously, speaking from experience. [bleep] education, go to Arizona State.

Lent, seriously, how old are you?

 

Oh, btw, new advice for yall. Never go to an Ivy League school. The girls are for the most part ugly prudes who like to think highly of themselves because they're in the one environment of their lives where they're no more ugly than the next girl. I am in no way exagerating.

 

Seriously, speaking from experience. [bleep] education, go to Arizona State.

Haha I can affirm that. I had a buddy go to Dartmouth for a year and said [bleep] it and went to a smaller private school closer to home. He hated the kids there.

 

 

Same applies for a date (to field one of Alexpop's questions).

If you get a girl to go on a date with you, she's already said yes. There's no reason to be awkward or nervous. And don't think twice about kissing her on the first date. Do it. Don't think. Act. If she agreed to go out wit hyou, she's already accepted the fact that you'll probably kiss her. She probably wants you to.

 

Yeah I have to say I agree with this.

 

There was a girl I was tlaking to a while back, I din't really think she'd like me, I so wasn't going to ask her out, but my friend stole my phone and did it for me lol. Well we went on a 'date' the next day, and later that night she was texting me saying she was bored at some concert. This time i took the bold approach, and invited her to come round and visit me. She ended up staying the night... :grin:

In fact, you aren't asking her to go out with her. You're telling her that she is going out with you Friday. I was thinking, the term "asking out" sounds pathetic and unmanly. Telling a girl that you're going out, however, is guaranteed to put hair on your chest.

Lent, seriously, how old are you?

Fifteen.

 

Ish.