"I want a girlfriend/boyfriend", and other such relationship advice

[Skull]

Hey guys. So, i have a bad situation at my school.

See, what happend was I told a friend who my secret crush was.

And, guess what happend? My friend went and told my entire grade, and know im embarrassed whenever she glances at me.

 

What do I do?

(BTW, the way my crush found out is that my firend asked her if she liked me, and apparently, she said she kind of liked me)

 

So what's the problem .. ? Ask her out. Worst she can say is no.

 

Besides, what's the point of liking someone "secretly"?

well, um, the problem is that im shy when it comes to girls...like, extremely. :( :( :sad: and, im not so shure my friend is trusworthy

I'm guessing you're a bit younger than me, but even if you're not, the point is still valid.

 

If you keep up the "I'm shy" behavior and mentality, you're going to have a really hard time getting over it in the future. So just go for it now, and pretend it doesn't bother you. If you keep telling yourself you're not shy or socially awkward or whatever, eventually you won't be. And the younger you start to get over it the easier it is. So suck it up and ask her. Don't fear rejection, I'd say you have a much better chance of her saying yes than no.

 

Edit: Ok, you are younger than me. What I said is even more true at your age. Relationships aren't serious at that age and a girl is likely to say yes if you ask her even if she doesn't really want to, simply because she would feel bad turning you down etc.

[iamcoool11]

Hey guys. So, i have a bad situation at my school.

See, what happend was I told a friend who my secret crush was.

And, guess what happend? My friend went and told my entire grade, and know im embarrassed whenever she glances at me.

 

What do I do?

(BTW, the way my crush found out is that my firend asked her if she liked me, and apparently, she said she kind of liked me)

 

So what's the problem .. ? Ask her out. Worst she can say is no.

 

Besides, what's the point of liking someone "secretly"?

well, um, the problem is that im shy when it comes to girls...like, extremely. :( :( :sad: and, im not so shure my friend is trusworthy

I'm guessing you're a bit younger than me, but even if you're not, the point is still valid.

 

If you keep up the "I'm shy" behavior and mentality, you're going to have a really hard time getting over it in the future. So just go for it now, and pretend it doesn't bother you. If you keep telling yourself you're not shy or socially awkward or whatever, eventually you won't be. And the younger you start to get over it the easier it is. So suck it up and ask her. Don't fear rejection, I'd say you have a much better chance of her saying yes than no.

 

Edit: Ok, you are younger than me. What I said is even more true at your age. Relationships aren't serious at that age and a girl is likely to say yes if you ask her even if she doesn't really want to, simply because she would feel bad turning you down etc.

well, theres this thing at my school called zaps(dont ask why its named that), where someone writes a name on the palm of your hand, and a time on the back. if you look at the name before that time, then you have to ask them out. So, you can never know if their serious or not.

[Skull]

Doesn't matter. Do it anyways and clarify that you're serious if you need to. Being assertive is a good thing, and helps you prepare for dating when you're older. If you're a chicken like I was, you're going to be playing catch-up for the next few years and the guys who were assertive will beat you out every time.

[iamcoool11]

okthen, thanks, im going to stop posting now, but il watch this topic anyways.

i hope this works :ohnoes: :unsure:

[Omar]

I think you're scared for absolutely no reason. If she kind of likes you back then she's definitely not thinking "Oh lord, what a [bleep]weed" whenever she sees you.

Just don't do everything you can to please her (do whatever she wants, get her flowers, your lunch, etc). That's shooting yourself in the foot. Be firm, she isn't superior to you. And don't be mean either.

[Randox]

I didn't know I was quoted iamcool :mrgreen:

 

Anyways, whether I think I have a chance or not currently means nothing anyways. I don't want ot be in an affair, so I have no interest being more than friends until shes not in a relationship.

 

A guy can dream though.

 

At least I now know that shes interested in being friends at a minimum, and I already made peace with the fact that friends a very possible ending outcome.

[Deiophobus]

Ok, well thanks for the advice Dan. I know you weren't trying to be hard, I suppose what I was looking for was to be told "Go for it! She'll say yes!", but that's probably not realistic. I disagree that it would ruin the friendship if she said no though. It might be awkward for a short time, but she would get over it.

It could make her think that the only reason you were hanging out with her was because you were interested though. If you do happen to ask her and she does happen to say no, I'd make sure to let her know that you appreciate time spent with her regardless of whether or not there is the potential for anything else to happen.

 

I don't think she would think that, we're actually very good friends. I'm not sure if that makes it harder or easier though..

I was also wondering about something. Whenever we sit next to each other doing homework, or messing around online, our legs/arms are always touching. I have not had many friends who are girls before, so I don't know if this is perfectly normal, or actually means something.

[Sumpta]

I left here eight months ago (I don't regret it either), but whilst I cancelling the subscriptions I still receive from here, I decided to check this thread.

 

I know it is totally not done at the sarcastic and "cool" tip.it board here, but a small giddy squee escaped me when I saw your name pop up. I sort of want to hug your post. Your absence is a loss to the board. It's really great to hear from you and I hope you're doing well.

 

I agree with your assessment about Oneitis. There's nothing wrong with being head over heels for one person, as long as it doesn't lead to extreme tunnel vision. Still, I think that it's a good tip for most of the people who come here with love troubles to look a bit further than the idolatry they often have going on for one person, who is often toying around with them.

[Lenticular_J]

Haha, I love living in a college town. I don't love living in Lubbock, I just love the Texas Tech part. This story is really long, because me and a friend in Amarillo give each other "field reports" via e-mail. I edited it a little, but it's still basically me entering myself in a circle-jerk. With myself. Just a warning.

 

[hide] Texas Tech and Texas A&M are playing today, and I went to the tailgate with my brother, his friends, and parents. My friends, of course, all said it sounded boring. I'm pretty sure a lot of them sat around their house playing videogames today, while I got such a massive confidence boost I'll probably be happy for a month.

 

So, went around, hanging out around the parking lot. A couple of my friends that went to A&M after high school were there, and I was talking some [cabbage] with them. Then, they said they wanted to run and get something. I figured I'd go with them, (By the way, Texas Tech has had a reputation for having the hottest girls, and A&M wasn't ranked too far down on that list either) because it seemed like the best-looking girls were just showing up. I was dressed pretty casually, because I was expecting a lot of people to be drinking and playing football, and that doesn't spell well for you if you're nicely dressed. I had a little bit of peacocking though; I was wearing a Tech shirt and jeans and regular school clothes, but I also had my favorite aviators and one of my fedoras (with, what else? a peacock feather). I'd been getting looks from people all day, but I never judged them as worth following - I was having a good time with friends, you know?

 

Well, when we were walking back (through alliteration village), this group of stunning girls wearing Aggie shirts were walking towards the stadium (there are a lot of big fields on the Tech campus, we were walking through one). Two of them really caught my eye, probably because they looked a little younger. There were I think 7 of them, and I was walking with four other guys I'd known. Here's the picture for you, though: I'm relatively tall, but I'm not extremely fit. I'm pretty thin really, seeing as I'm 6"1 and 148 pounds, and I'm walking with guys that are on their college wrestling and track teams. We were all around the same height, which I guess was good. And all of us were wearing a hat, although I was the only one with a cool one.

 

Anyways, picture painted. We were walking, and the girls were pointing to us and giggling. We were just being all cool and tough-guyish. The girls start walking through our little group, and they take our hats! They just walk away wearing them. I'm pretty sure we were all about to freak out and grab them, but something kept us from doing that, and we just kept walking while the girls laughed. Then, they started slowing down, because they realized that we didn't notice.

 

Anyways, some regular flirting and stuff, all good, we convince them to walk back to the truck my friends from A&M came in, and we turn on the radio and just sit there in the middle of a parking field talking. Of course, what they'd left in the trunk was a couple cases of beer. So we're all just sitting there, talking and junk, when at some point someone suggested playing the truth game (have to truthfully answer any question people ask for like 5 minutes). Now, everyone here is (supposedly) in college. My friends are all freshman, but as you may know, I'm a sophomore in high school. So we're doing the game, having fun, some of the girls are getting a little buzzed. Naturally, sex questions come up. One of my friends has decided it is his job to ask every girl which guy they would like to sleep with the most, just judging from the night. My score - three of them, including the two I was most attracted to (and one was a sophomore in college!). Hahahaha. Goes to show you. Now, you go do it!

[/hide]

I thought it was worth posting. It's really me showing off to my friend, and I realize how much it makes me sound like a total [bleep], like deloriagod or something, but, hey. Sometimes I am a [bleep].

 

It really does show you what confidence can do for you. Especially since this has kind of been a really bad week. I've been doing sorta badly in school, and for some reason people have been kind of standoffish with me (some freshman girl started a rumor that I slept with her. I'm a virgin and I never met her. I don't really understand it and I only found out today :/ ). Just be confident, guys.

 

And now, back to disappearing for a week. Damn internet.

[Furah]

I finally decided to ask that girl out, turns out she had gotten a bf since we had last met.

[RpgGamer]

I left here eight months ago (I don't regret it either), but whilst I cancelling the subscriptions I still receive from here, I decided to check this thread.

 

Ginger Warrior, you've returned! Your presense has surely been missed. This thread isn't what it used to be without you and Goddess. You guys helped me through so much, so whether you see this post or not, thank you for all that you've done. For me, and the countless others you helped guide with your incomparable maturity. Thank you.

 

@Lent

 

You're only a Sophmore? I never would have guessed. Not only are you pretty big for you age, you have a certain air about you (from what I can tell in your posting lol) that makes you seem older. Strange. That's a hell of a story though. I'm certainly jealous :P

[Rebdragon]

I left here eight months ago (I don't regret it either), but whilst I cancelling the subscriptions I still receive from here, I decided to check this thread.

Go back.

[Orpheus]

I left here eight months ago (I don't regret it either), but whilst I cancelling the subscriptions I still receive from here, I decided to check this thread.

Go back.

 

Part of me is wondering where the hell Ginger vanished to, and the other part of me is wondering if you two didn't get along well or something.

[Rebdragon]

I don't remember him very well, but I think we got along pretty well. I'm just not liking the vibe of the guy who came back.

[StrOwez]

I finally decided to ask that girl out, turns out she had gotten a bf since we had last met.

 

good lesson there, don't hang about. Girls are like car parking spaces, all the good ones are taken, so sometime you have to stick it into the disabled one.

[Orpheus]

I don't remember him very well, but I think we got along pretty well. I'm just not liking the vibe of the guy who came back.

 

Yeah, no kidding. He seems a bit... pretentious/condescending, if that's the vibe you're getting.

[RpgGamer]

Don't talk about Ginger like that. He's done more for the people of this thread than you can imagine.

 

And that's a terrible lesson to learn StrOwez. Atleast in the way you said it. i agree that all the good girls are taken, but that just means you should act on it whenevr you get the chance. Not jsut settle for something less. Basically, you gotta step up to the plate before someone else does. I think that's a better lesson.

[TTanT]

Basically, you gotta step up to the plate before someone else does. I think that's a better lesson.

 

 

And make sure that you don't strike out. Just be cool and get some wood on the ball. Even pros rarely get a home run on the first swing.

[Skull]

Hurray for inspirational baseball metaphors.

[champion]

I didn't really interpret the phrase "get some wood on the ball" as it was meant to be interpreted.

[Deiophobus]

So I did it. As we were walking back to our dorms at about 2 am last night I asked if she wanted to go out some time, and she said no, there's someone back home she really likes.

I'm not sure how I feel about this. I'm disappointed at her answer, but I'm glad I asked anyway. At least I tried, and I can't regret not speaking up now. I've never actually had the courage to ask someone out before, and now that I've at least tried it I feel like it will be easier in the future. I think we can remain good friends too, it really was not that awkward.

 

By the way, I don't think ginger's comment about not regretting leaving was meant to reflect poorly on people here. I understand what you mean by the "person returning" attitude, but I doubt he feels superior to us just because he left.

[LowFatMilk]

this thread make me sick lol, to much love talking

[Omar]

I didn't really interpret the phrase "get some wood on the ball" as it was meant to be interpreted.

+1

I got hit on by a girl at a party and I'm afraid she might keep going. I'm not at ALL interested, so I'm considering telling her I already have a girlfriend if she asks, and getting another girl to pose as such. Any suggestions/objections?

[Edit]

So I did it.

Props. :thumbup:

[deathdrow]

I didn't really interpret the phrase "get some wood on the ball" as it was meant to be interpreted.

+1

I got hit on by a girl at a party and I'm afraid she might keep going. I'm not at ALL interested, so I'm considering telling her I already have a girlfriend if she asks, and getting another girl to pose as such. Any suggestions/objections?

[Edit]

So I did it.

Props. :thumbup:

I object, that's a retarted idea, and you'll get caught up in it, just don't act interested, or get really obsessive towards her.

[Omar]

I object, that's a retarted idea, and you'll get caught up in it, just don't act interested, or get really obsessive towards her.

 

Well i already do, that's not stopping her. And I'm not getting really obsessive, she doesn't look like she gets a lot of guys so she wouldn't mind (read: she's fat).