Granted, but that is because the US politically splits up into four countries out of dispute so Obama was technically the last president of the US. Hilarity and violence ensues.

 

I wish I wasn't so allergic to routine.

Granted, but your life becomes a never ending routine that happens the same everyday.

 

I wish that I could get my S**t together.

I know it's supposed to be shit, but since you censored that word, I'm gonna assume it's salt.

 

Granted, you get all your salt into one bowl.

 

I wish I could spit in eight different directions.

Granted. It hurts and you die within seconds. What did you expect? :|

 

I wish it was an hour earlier than it currently is.

Granted, but it took you 6 hours to build a time machine, and therefore you had to travel back 7 hours in time to reach your intended destination. :P

 

 

I wish Alg had not just thought of BlazeTMF dying... :(

 

 

~D. V. "This isn't H.W.Z.P.A.Y.D.!!!" Devnull

Granted, but he thinks of something far FAR FAR worse!!!!!!

 

I wish Jagex would release cheat codes for their games, including:

 

Infinite prayers

Infinite health

Max skill EXP

Infinite rune arrows

Infinite blood runes

 

And more.

 

And it wouldn't be against the rules either

 

Then I'd cheat.

Granted, but nobody can type the codes on the interface and the only option is to hit 'x'. They are there and free to use, but physically impossible to enter them.

 

I wish I was a magnificent guile hero.

Granted, but it's impossible for you to...get it on, if you know what I mean.

 

I wish I could stop procrastinating.

Granted, now you are overactive and never able to get enough sleep. (wish I could get that wish without corruption....)

 

I wish that I could ninja DVD.

Granted, you ninja him in the middle of him being ninja'd by you. Hilarity ensues.

 

And by that I mean temporal paradoxes ensue.

 

I wish the sun wasn't always in my eyes when I use this computer.

Granted, but the Sun makes it up by being extra bright on the occasion it can get to your eyes to the point it fries your eyeballs, irises and all.

 

I wish any person who corrupts my wishes without being creative suffers fifty years of bad luck.

Granted, but they suffer 50 years of mediocure luck, meanwhile you kill yourself because of the sheer stupidity of the response.

hope I'm not number 1...

 

I wish for a never ending supply of Brisk iced tea.

I wish for a never ending supply of Brisk iced tea.

Granted, but you're unlucky enough to find out that you're allergic to the drink. So you're stuck with a drink that you can never drink without having severe issues. :(

 

 

 

Now, this one wishes that their body in real life could fully repair itself, and has no issues/problems/etc. with doing so, even when instantly doing a full repair. This lack of issues/problems/etc. happens to include a lack of anyone else trying to attack/kidnap/etc. this one over the matter, just to name one item among the infinite list of things. :-k

 

 

~D. V. "So many things to wish for..." Devnull

 

 

 

(p.s.: This post has no bearing towards this one's forum-self, as that body is a different body from this one's real-life-self's body.)

 

 

 

 

[Edit by post author due to a slight-but-annoying typing mistake.]

Edited March 23, 201214 yr by D_V_Devnull

Granted, but your injuries that are corrected by it are inflicted on your loved ones. (mmm, getting a little dark here)

 

I wish I could stop reading the SCP foundation wiki.

Granted, you stop reading that wiki because you get banned from the Internet, permanently.

 

I wish the following events would happen:

 

Someone breaks into my house with a gun and says, "Give me all your money, or I'll shoot." then I'd aim my gun at him and say "I have a gun too, you idiot."

 

You decide what happens next.

He goes, "well mine is bigger, and I already shot you." You look down and notice a great big gaping hole in your pelvis area.

 

I wish that I was unable to be bored.

Granted, now that you are entertained by everything, you can't give a valid opinion.

 

I wish I wouldn't be banned from this message board. I'm serious, I got a personal message from a global mod and he warned me. My blog is the best place to list my monster drops and I don't wanna lose the access.

Granted, you give no reason to explain so we are unable to know why you left.

 

I wish that I could get a girlfriend.

Granted. She's inflatable.

 

I wish that I had a future self to guide me through life by telling me exactly what's going to happen next and whether or not I'll be successful in something.

Granted, unfortunately your future self gets shot three days from now by a wanted criminal.

 

I wish I could eat the same fruit that made Luffy from One Piece into rubber.

Granted, but since I have no idea what you are talking about some <3: up stuff happens.

 

I wish for a girlfriend, who likes me, who I like, and who isn't inflatable.

Granted, she slaps you in the face for wishing for her too much.

 

I wish bonez would stop using the same wish multiple times. It is ok to use the same wish twice if you can't think of something better, but you do it too much.

Granted, you force him to give up on his life goal of creating an un corruptable wish by repeating the same wish each time while taking out flaws.

 

I wish that BTMF would tell me why he was almost banned.

Granted, but you are sworn to secrecy, and your tongue is removed because he doesn't trust you not to tell.

 

I wish to use this wish at a later date.

Granted, but the wish expires before you are able to use it.

 

I wish that I could have a god like atmosphere around me.