I wish for a mansion with 7,000 escalators, 3,700 floors and one elevator.

Really? Granted, but they all have a simultaneous breakdown because of both mechanical and/or power failures. This leaves you with the equivalent of The Tower Of Babel, and a very hard and long time traveling up and/or down it. :(

 

 

I wish, now that I've gotten back to being 1st-person, that I had let that "March RS BTS Lunacy"-related scream out of myself much sooner. I was so insane that not letting it out resulted in the craziness of a third-person spree. :wall:

 

 

~D. V. "We devolve to madness... We all fail..." Devnull

Granted. But you still end up talking in third-person and have to take a mental health test. You fail said test and are thrown into a padded room with a straitjacket.

 

I wish cars would run on something common, easily obtainable, and renewable (e.g. salt/oceanwater), instead of gasoline.

Granted. Cars now run on wood, which, while renewable to a certain point, still use nonrenewable resources to grow (And more than they give in energy, via laws of thermodynamics). The end result is that we quickly run out of wood (Because we can't grow enough to keep up with demand - Seriously, there are lots of cars and as far as I know, wood isn't efficient enough), clean water (Because growing fuel for cars end up being more important than hydration and fertile soil (Due to the same thing as trees, and later because of desertification). This leads to more of those global warming issues that Al Gore warned us about and generally ruins the lives of a lot of people.

 

I wish it would rain instead of just being cloudy and sort of cold.

Granted, it starts flooding in your city.

 

I wish someone incredibly evil would push a button.

I wish someone incredibly evil would push a button.

Granted... but nothing happens due to a miswiring of a doomsday weapon. :P

 

 

Now, I wish something incredibly silly and funny would happen, without anyone/anything getting to be any form of hurt/dead/broken. O:)

 

 

~D. V. "Mr. Nice Guy" Devnull

Granted. Something funny would happen but it ruins the person's reputation. They don't feel hurt or broken, so it's still on the conditions.

 

I wish Alg was female and had to wear cosplay dresses for the rest of his her life, all provided by the Gods for no charge.

Granted. It confuses the hell out of her for obvious reasons.

 

After staring blankly at the screen for 15 minutes, that's the best I could come up with.

 

Being a fan of revenge (And still too confused to come up with something else), I wish for the same to happen to Lokie.

Granted, he she enjoys it in that sick twisted thing they call a mind...

 

I wish that I could have more time, more money, and more confidence.

 

Feel free to use a different corruption for each wish.

Granted, you become a multi-billionaire in a world where it's always midday. And you are confident that you will never die.

 

I wish Darth Vader was my father and I'd be the one who's in the epic scene by the end of the movie Star Wars V, and not Luke Skywalker.

Granted. That means you take his place and that means you kissed your sister to everyone's pleasure.

 

I wish the pirate titles were permanent.

Granted, but you end up dying because of a random grammar nazi spree...

 

I wish that TIF would just go back to good old TIF...

Granted. It becomes boring and must resort to human sacrifices to please themselves; you're first on the list.

 

I wish I was a master hedonist.

Wish granted, but since nobody knows that a hedonist is, you never find that self-gratification outside of your right hand.

 

I wish I were dead.

Granted. Turns out the Buddhists were right, so it doesn't last long.

 

I wish that space travel was safe and practical, with all of the soft science and pseudoscience that science fiction has taught us to love.

Granted, but that also means all those homicidal alien lifeforms also exist and are heading our way. Hello, Daleks! Cyborgs! Ewoks! Na'vi, etc. Extinction? Please enslave us give us some "fun".

 

I wish I was the master of double-entendre.

Granted. This comes at the cost of your ability to be straightforward, and everyone else is greatly disturbed by it.

 

I wish for a pair of rechargeable AA batteries.

Granted. But you don't have a charger so you throw them out when they're dead.

 

I wish for two AA batteries that had unlimited energy.

Granted, but they leak battery acid like the Niagara Falls.

 

I wish I had cat-like agility and reflexes.

Granted, you become a cat. Which means you can no longer do stuff humans can do.

 

I wish for a Gargoyle statue in my garden.

Granted, but it's one of those nasty Assassin Gargoyles from the Doctor Who series... You can imagine what happens next, and you had better hope The Doctor has come to save you and any other innocents which that monstrosity shouldn't be killing. :(

 

 

I wish I hadn't seen that episode of Doctor Who with the Assassin Gargoyles, as well as had never seen the one with all the Meat-Eating Bugs hiding in the Library Books. :cry:

 

 

~D. V. "Welcome to the Dismal 'Doctor Who'-isms..." Devnull

Granted, but the memory is still embedded in you.

 

I wish I could re-write myself into a new reincarnation.

Granted, but you don't like your new reincarnation, and you can't go back.

 

I wish for magical sunglasses that give me the ability to mind control others.

Wish granted, but the glasses don't work.

 

I wish that somebody doesn't post under me.

Granted, but minds are crypted with fifty codes and you need 20 AA and 30 AAA batteries to run the pair for one use.

 

I wish I was better at being sneaky.

Granted. It also grants (And corrupts!) Vezon's wish because he doesn't see you post under him. You're later caught in the aftermath of an otherwise perfectly planned museum heist. The getaway driver was an informant.

 

I wish for the next poster's wish.