The Runar Posted January 11, 2009 Share Posted January 11, 2009 This guy was not really a noob, but I think it's still funny :D I'm playing with my lvl-41 F2P character. I see a lvl-114 player in Falador, wearing a HP cape. Me: Hmm a hitpoints cape? Him: No it's smithing :P Me: Was it hard to get? Him: At Pestle Control Me: It's Pest Control Him: ...Shut up! :P It's really annoying if you see a player that's 70 levels lower than you and knows more :) The Runar's (OSRS) DIY blog - most viewed Blogscape blog ever! Contract? ／人◕ ‿‿ ◕人＼ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
3hitm4g3u Posted January 12, 2009 Share Posted January 12, 2009 Guy attacks my rock crabs after I tell him not to, yet he can't take it back. Logged out afterwards. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
eoghan62 Posted January 12, 2009 Share Posted January 12, 2009 noob siad to me nice full mith when i was wearing full rune :roll: Erin go bragh (Ireland for ever) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Psycho_Robot Posted January 12, 2009 Share Posted January 12, 2009 Guy attacks my rock crabs after I tell him not to, yet he can't take it back. Logged out afterwards. "You're lots of fun honeybun" = EPIC :thumbup: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shuri Posted January 13, 2009 Share Posted January 13, 2009 :lol: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Shadow_Clawe Posted January 13, 2009 Share Posted January 13, 2009 Playing on Eve, banking at mage arena. Level 32: omg wat a noob Me: Hm? Level 32: u level 3 u got nothing i have 98 mage i no it looks hard but its possible wat ur mage lvl noob? Me: 1 Level 32: haha u noob my main is levl 138 hed kill you in like 4 hits haha Me: An imp could kill me in 2 hits Level 32: oh pff wats your mains name so i could pwn him Me: Bye As I was leaving, he brought out his prized audience hat from the circus.. "I boht it for 2m i bet u dont have 2m" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
arisaka Posted January 13, 2009 Share Posted January 13, 2009 Got another one! N: Any1 have an account i acn have? Me: that's against the rules, you know. Me: I reported you. (someone else said something like that, too) N: who cares? Other guy who also reported him: Have fun being banned. Me: Unlike you, I read the rules. N: hahaha ill duel u on my main? Me: You don't have one. N: yes ido (says something random, I searched on highscores, nothing) *Noob logs out, hasn't been back for 5 minutes and counting* Arisaka, the Japanese rifle. O_o Tell me, did any of you happen to kill a red spy on the way here? No? Then we still have a problem. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Juhnie Posted January 13, 2009 Share Posted January 13, 2009 :lol: ROFL. :XD: Master of Attack ~ August 29th, 2010Proud to have served the awesome Tip.It Crew <3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bedman Posted January 13, 2009 Share Posted January 13, 2009 Guy attacks my rock crabs after I tell him not to, yet he can't take it back. Logged out afterwards. "You're lots of fun honeybun" = EPIC :thumbup: Wait, who's the noob in that conversation? A Guide to Chinning in Ape atoll: up to 325kxp/h! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
wcingisbad Posted January 13, 2009 Share Posted January 13, 2009 Guy attacks my rock crabs after I tell him not to, yet he can't take it back. Logged out afterwards. "You're lots of fun honeybun" = EPIC :thumbup: Wait, who's the noob in that conversation? [hide=Definiton of noob, by urban dictionary]A. INTRO I. What is this? II. Defining 'Noob' B. COMMON NOOB CHARACTERISTICS I. Noobish II. Where to find noobs III. Behavior of noobs IV. Noob religion V. More about noob habitats C. AVOIDING NOOBS I. Make sure you aren't one II. Major noob avoiding strategies ------------------------ A. INTRO I. What is this? This guide is designed to give you a better understanding of what a noob is, how to recognize them, some details about them, and how to avoid or get rid of them. It mostly applies to online forums, which are the main targets of migrating noobs. II. Defining 'Noob' Contrary to the belief of many, a noob/n00b and a newbie/newb are not the same thing. Newbs are those who are new to some task* and are very beginner at it, possibly a little overconfident about it, but they are willing to learn and fix their errors to move out of that stage. n00bs, on the other hand, know little and have no will to learn any more. They expect people to do the work for them and then expect to get praised about it, and make up a unique species of their own. It is the latter we will study in this guide so that the reader is prepared to encounter them in the wild if needed. Noobs are often referred to as n00bs as a sign of disrespect toward them, and it's often hella funny, but I will refer to them as noobs during this reading. * Usually the topic at hand on an internet forum. B. COMMON NOOB CHARACTERISTICS I. Noobish Often, but not always, noobs will attempt to communicate in their own primitive language, known as "n00bish." It is a variant of the hacker language that exposes them as having little intelligence or will to learn. Here is an example of some noobish. Do not attempt to comprehend it: it cannot be discerned without professionals at hand. stFU /../..an, i r teh r0xx0rz liek emin3m, u cna go tO EHLL OR ATLE4St help m3 wit hthIS!!111!!!!!!!1~~1!!``!! LOLLOLOLLOLOLlOoLLOlollLLl u n00b Although you may find this unbelievably funny and/or annoying, it is best to restrain yourself and keep from talking back to them, as they are very territorial and easily angered. This will result in their attempted verbal abuse of you, possibly backed up by other noobs, because they work in packs when doing offensive tasks. It is not an easy task to learn this language because our intelligent accent will keep it from sounding quite right when spoken. You can write some simple noobish of your own, however, by slamming your face into your keyboard repeatedly. II. Where to find n00bs On the internet, n00bs make their colonies on forums. They migrate in waves, usually on weekends, and proceed to clog up bandwidth with stupid questions and sometimes even stupid answers. If you happen to be unfortunate enough to be on a board large enough to attract migrating noobs, there will hopefully be authority in charge who is smart enough to take extermination measures before they can make nests and larger colonies. THE BANNER HAMMER is one form of authority. Larger colonies can result in the mutation of some into spammers. Not commercial spammers, but pointless spammers. A noob can become one of these at any point, but the larger the amount of noobs, the more chance pointless spammers will appear. Off the internet, noobs appear anywhere the focus is on learning or discussing something specific. III. Behavior of noobs Since noobs are basically ignorant bastards, they have a lot in common. The most often seen characteristic is their fluency in noobish, which is why it got its own section. They will also be very self confident as if they were the absolute best at what they are in fact the worst at. Also, they are quite agressive and self-centered, and tend to laugh a lot using many L's and O's in rapid sucession (the noobish word for laughing like an ultimate [developmentally delayed]). It is their instinct to assemble in packs for defense, and they often attempt to organize packs that they call teams. Unfortunately for them, teams usually result in a total loss of communication and they can often begin to fight amongst each other. These teams are quite unlike those formed by non-noobs. Noobs have difficulty reading English and cannot comprehend the idea of authority. Therefore, they have an all-out disregard for rules, basic or not. A good way to identify a noob (bad) vs. a newb (good) is to tell them (or have an authority tell them) which rule they are unknowingly breaking. If they respond with an apology and fix it, they are probably not a noob. If they react by insulting everything around them in rapid noobish and causing general mayhem, it is because they are a noob and have had a small seizure due to their inability to understand what is happening. IV. Noob Religion Noobs follow a variation of the 1337 (sometimes 7331) religion, in which they worship the number in odd rituals and put altars in their forum avatars and signatures. They often call themselves 1337, which experts say is somewhat like calling themselves godly in a human language. It's best to not interfere with their religious fantasies and practices because that can lead to a noob uprising, which can turn a forum to mush in less than a week. V. More about noob habitats Noobs often attempt to maintain their own web pages. Some common features of these lairs are a terrible lack of content, background music, lots of pointless animated gifs, and pages that say some variation of 'tHEir isnothinG H34r yEtt LOLLOLOL!111!1!!~~~!!`! 13371337', which means 'Nothing here yet' in noobish. They will also have large, seemingly infinite marquees of 88X31 affiliate buttons replaced with red X's scattered here and there, and possibly a hit counter showing a number less than 100. These habitats are numerous but fairly easy to avoid because only noobs link to them. So if you can identify a noob, don't go to its homepage. Simple as that. C. AVOIDING NOOBS I. Make sure you aren't one Note: This section is bilingual so even noobs can make the discovery if they haven't already. English (T4lk)- Read the above parts of this guide carefully. If you find yourself unable to comprehend any of it but are instead beginning to think about how great you are and how awesome 'teh 1337' is, you might want to take one of the many available online quizzes to check your noobancy. Noobish (133713371337)- Liek, u gott4 re3D teh gudieCAREFUl1y and tehn OMG LIEK I AM R0XX0RZ ya anD ify 0u turn into teh [developmentally delayed]ED u gota go 2 MY WEBP4GE LOLLOLOL!!111~11 ad check 4 warez n stfuu. if u r a n00b go2HELL LOLLOLOlROFLMFAO11!!!11!!!! a/s/l pos gtg n00b suxx0rz ur b0xx0rz OLOOOLOLLLL HELP HELP HELP 1337133713371337 II. Major noob avoiding strategies The main factor in attracting migrating herds of noobs is a large, active forum. If you find one of these, look to see if it has the management to avoid noob infestation. If not, look for a small or mid-sized forum that covers the same topic so you can enjoy your time there before the noobs find it. Another way to keep noobs from interfering with your life is to become part of the authority on one of these forums. But that's often hard to do so you'll probably be better off avoiding larger forums first off. If you do manage to become part of the authority, however, take full advantage of it and establish extermination policies so that normal people can have a nice time without noob infestations.[/hide] Take your own conclusions. Help: I suggest you to focus on these topics: -Grammar -Behaviour R.I.P. Neko :[5,445,898,965th to 99 WoodcuttingBlogs are dead Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
3hitm4g3u Posted January 13, 2009 Share Posted January 13, 2009 Guy attacks my rock crabs after I tell him not to, yet he can't take it back. Logged out afterwards. "You're lots of fun honeybun" = EPIC :thumbup: Wait, who's the noob in that conversation? Me = Evil Offence. I would hope that softcore is the noob :? . He was attacking my rock crabs, once I started attacking his rock crabs back the conversation above ensued. He logged out at the end. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Friendyboy Posted January 13, 2009 Share Posted January 13, 2009 heres one that happened to me yesterday: noob:selling dragon chain 100000000m! me:dude it is impossible to have that much gp... noob: you only say that cuz you dont got enough! me:lol (thank you for your report) noob: why are you standing there?arent you ganna report me? me: lol ok i will noob: plz no i will do what ever you want! me:get me a d axe noob:... ok (he got it how wierd #-o , i wonder how he got it :-k ) me:lol i still reported you. noob:reported for item scamming! And you are calling him a noob? I would have reported you for misuse of the report system. He has done absolutely nothing wrong! Sda tbh. Dont go calling people noobs for basically no reason! By the sounds of it, you are the definition of a noob. Making yourself look bad, not him. me:... whatever 16x Black mask1x Dragon Chainbody1x Dragonic Visage32x Dragon BootsObsidian Drops:-13 x Cape/ 6 x Shield/ 6 x Maul/ 750+ Onyx Tips Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
bedman Posted January 13, 2009 Share Posted January 13, 2009 Guy attacks my rock crabs after I tell him not to, yet he can't take it back. Logged out afterwards. "You're lots of fun honeybun" = EPIC :thumbup: Wait, who's the noob in that conversation? Me = Evil Offence. I would hope that softcore is the noob :? . He was attacking my rock crabs, once I started attacking his rock crabs back the conversation above ensued. He logged out at the end. I was confused cause you said he attacked your rockcrabs and I saw him saying "off noob", and assumed it was you. So I thought, wth, this guy is a noob himself, calling the other one a noob :o A Guide to Chinning in Ape atoll: up to 325kxp/h! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
3hitm4g3u Posted January 13, 2009 Share Posted January 13, 2009 Guy attacks my rock crabs after I tell him not to, yet he can't take it back. Logged out afterwards. "You're lots of fun honeybun" = EPIC :thumbup: Wait, who's the noob in that conversation? Me = Evil Offence. I would hope that softcore is the noob :? . He was attacking my rock crabs, once I started attacking his rock crabs back the conversation above ensued. He logged out at the end. I was confused cause you said he attacked your rockcrabs and I saw him saying "off noob", and assumed it was you. So I thought, wth, this guy is a noob himself, calling the other one a noob :o Lol I should've explained better :P Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest Posted January 13, 2009 Share Posted January 13, 2009 lol yeap one noob told me that dragon with smithable from ore, i had to rgue my case saying no it it not! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
n00bfiterpk6 Posted January 14, 2009 Share Posted January 14, 2009 i went into f2p wearing bandos and a strength vcape (t) and had this conversation with some lvl 69. noob: can i borrow your cape? me: nope noob: why not? me: i cant lend it noob: yes u can u scamming noob noob: ill pay you 6.2k and a harpoon! me: i really cant lend it.. noob: yes u cam, omg reported! me: what for? noob: for macroing.. me: wtf? noob: u obviously macroed and hacked cuase a person your level cant be as nooby as you.. me: ok... im sorry noob: **** you you mother ****ing noob i ****ed ur mum so hard **** came out of her *** i then teleported away and decided never to walk around randomy in f2p again :) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
legilgalad2 Posted January 14, 2009 Share Posted January 14, 2009 i went into f2p wearing bandos and a strength vcape (t) and had this conversation with some lvl 69. noob: can i borrow your cape? me: nope noob: why not? me: i cant lend it noob: yes u can u scamming noob noob: ill pay you 6.2k and a harpoon! me: i really cant lend it.. noob: yes u cam, omg reported! me: what for? noob: for macroing.. me: wtf? noob: u obviously macroed and hacked cuase a person your level cant be as nooby as you.. me: ok... im sorry noob: **** you you mother ****ing noob i ****ed ur mum so hard **** came out of her *** i then teleported away and decided never to walk around randomy in f2p again :) :lol: , hilarious dialogue. However it's kinda expected for walking 'randomly' round F2p in a strength cape and bandos armour, you reap what you sow... Woodcutting does not raise your combat level because most people do not play as yew trees. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Miss War Posted January 14, 2009 Share Posted January 14, 2009 :lol: ROFL. :XD: haha now thats funny, Miss Private Chat is allways ON, So please feel free to add me, I allways enjoy a good conversation and Im also a very good listener. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Soar Posted January 14, 2009 Share Posted January 14, 2009 i dont know if it fits, but it has to be a great conversation. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
3rkid Posted January 14, 2009 Share Posted January 14, 2009 i dont know if it fits, but it has to be a great conversation. , please make it so that I can walk around with my balls and not be able to hit people. LMFAO! :lol: :lol: :lol: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Juhnie Posted January 14, 2009 Share Posted January 14, 2009 i dont know if it fits, but it has to be a great conversation. , please make it so that I can walk around with my balls and not be able to hit people. LMFAO! :lol: :lol: :lol: everytime I try to walk around I end up hitting someone with my balls, Oh my god. :XD: :XD: Master of Attack ~ August 29th, 2010Proud to have served the awesome Tip.It Crew <3 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
obfuscator Posted January 14, 2009 Share Posted January 14, 2009 "It's not a rest for me, it's a rest for the weights." - Dom Mazzetti Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Great_one Posted January 14, 2009 Share Posted January 14, 2009 chickens are the pwnzors :thumbsup: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
BlackDawn Posted January 14, 2009 Share Posted January 14, 2009 Laughed quite a bit at that :lol: How can people be that dumb? That's why you're on the TZDF blackdawn. Even your balls can tear zombies to shreds. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Earth_Poet Posted January 14, 2009 Share Posted January 14, 2009 I'm pretty convinced it's a joke, but it was still funny to me. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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