"I want a girlfriend/boyfriend", and other such relationship advice

[Lenticular_J]

Because of the huge physical, mental, emotional, and general maturity differences between those ages.

 

 

 

Are you both in high school, though? That's relatively common.

 

 

 

If she's in junior high, that's a bit wierder. Mainly because of how hard it will be for you two to see each other, and just how odd it sounds, despite the relatively small age difference. If you both think it'll work (think of it like two hormonal, crazy teenagers dammit), good for you. Git'er'dun.

[Woodcut Lvr]

Git'er'dun.

 

 

 

:twss: I concur.

[Intriguing]

I have a girlfriend who is 2 years younger than me, and I really like her and all that stuff, but I'm only in high school, and at this point I know relationships really aren't serious. The problem is that a lot of people around me, including my parents, seem to think I shouldn't be dating her due to the age difference, which I frankly don't get. It really has me torn, because I really like her, but I don't know if I can really take all the, for lack of a better word, criticism, that I get for dating her. I really don't want to just dump her, because I would feel like total [cabbage] seeing her unhappy. I don't know if I'm better off saying I just want to be friends or what. It's so confusing.

 

I've never had a problem with people of different ages dating. I used this example earlier in the thread, but when my parents met, my mum was 14, and my dad was 21. He expressed interest in her a year later, and they got married 5 or 6 years after that. They've been happily married for almost 30 years.

 

 

 

While Lenticular is right in that there are often very large differences in physical, mental, emotional, and maturity aspects, this is not always the case. It's ridiculous to treat relationships with "blanket rules" such as "age/2 + 7" or whatever it is. You have to treat things subjectively when you're dealing with people, as opposed to dealing with scientific laws.

 

 

 

In my opinion, if you actually like her, stick with the relationship. If you notice a vast difference in maturity levels and it bothers you, then maybe take things slow. There's no reason to ruin a potentially great relationship just because of the opinions of others.

[Kenshinjapan]

I have a girlfriend who is 2 years younger than me, and I really like her and all that stuff, but I'm only in high school, and at this point I know relationships really aren't serious. The problem is that a lot of people around me, including my parents, seem to think I shouldn't be dating her due to the age difference, which I frankly don't get. It really has me torn, because I really like her, but I don't know if I can really take all the, for lack of a better word, criticism, that I get for dating her. I really don't want to just dump her, because I would feel like total [cabbage] seeing her unhappy. I don't know if I'm better off saying I just want to be friends or what. It's so confusing.

 

I've never had a problem with people of different ages dating. I used this example earlier in the thread, but when my parents met, my mum was 14, and my dad was 21. He expressed interest in her a year later, and they got married 5 or 6 years after that. They've been happily married for almost 30 years.

 

 

 

While Lenticular is right in that there are often very large differences in physical, mental, emotional, and maturity aspects, this is not always the case. It's ridiculous to treat relationships with "blanket rules" such as "age/2 + 7" or whatever it is. You have to treat things subjectively when you're dealing with people, as opposed to dealing with scientific laws.

 

 

 

In my opinion, if you actually like her, stick with the relationship. If you notice a vast difference in maturity levels and it bothers you, then maybe take things slow. There's no reason to ruin a potentially great relationship just because of the opinions of others.

 

 

 

You have to remember that times are much different now than when your parents were getting married. Marriage ate the age of 19 is seen as a much worse thing than it was then.

[Intriguing]

You have to remember that times are much different now than when your parents were getting married. Marriage ate the age of 19 is seen as a much worse thing than it was then.

 

It was either 20 or 21, but never mind that.

 

 

 

And my point is the same regardless of whether or not "times have changed". My point was that it's too subjective an issue to be treated with a blanket rule, which is how most people have responded to similar questions earlier on in this thread.

 

 

 

I have a problem with people making stupid generalizations like "you can't date her, she's two years younger than you" with their only argument being age, and the maturity differences that are possibly, but not necessarily attached.

 

 

 

I apologize for the fact that I'm not doing a very good job at explaining this, but I hope you can at least recognize my point regardless.

[Kenshinjapan]

You have to remember that times are much different now than when your parents were getting married. Marriage ate the age of 19 is seen as a much worse thing than it was then.

 

It was either 20 or 21, but never mind that.

 

 

 

And my point is the same regardless of whether or not "times have changed". My point was that it's too subjective an issue to be treated with a blanket rule, which is how most people have responded to similar questions earlier on in this thread.

 

 

 

I have a problem with people making stupid generalizations like "you can't date her, she's two years younger than you" with their only argument being age, and the maturity differences that are possibly, but not necessarily attached.

 

 

 

I apologize for the fact that I'm not doing a very good job at explaining this, but I hope you can at least recognize my point regardless.

 

 

 

I agree with you with that part, just people need to remember to not to base all relationship decisions based on what the last generation did.

[Intriguing]

I agree with you with that part, just people need to remember to not to base all relationship decisions based on what the last generation did.

 

Fair point. My reason for using the example was just to show that a relationship like that actually has the potential to succeed.

 

 

 

At the same time, I would draw into question your statement that "Marriage ate the age of 19 is seen as a much worse thing than it was then." I know my parents, in particular my father, went through a fair bit of opposition about the relationship until my mum was about 18. Also, I know a fair few couples who, in the last two or so years, have gotten married with one of the members being only 19 or 20 (they weren't shotgun weddings, by the way).

 

 

 

I would say that the general consensus about it would be about the same now as it was back then. However, you'd probably have to talk to someone who was actually alive 30 or 40 years ago to get a good idea.

[Kenshinjapan]

I agree with you with that part, just people need to remember to not to base all relationship decisions based on what the last generation did.

 

Fair point. My reason for using the example was just to show that a relationship like that actually has the potential to succeed.

 

 

 

At the same time, I would draw into question your statement that "Marriage ate the age of 19 is seen as a much worse thing than it was then." I know my parents, in particular my father, went through a fair bit of opposition about the relationship until my mum was about 18. Also, I know a fair few couples who, in the last two or so years, have gotten married with one of the members being only 19 or 20 (they weren't shotgun weddings, by the way).

 

 

 

I would say that the general consensus about it would be about the same now as it was back then. However, you'd probably have to talk to someone who was actually alive 30 or 40 years ago to get a good idea.

 

 

 

Exactly, most young couples make it at least a few years. What I consider a successful marriage is a lifetime (let's just assume 20+ years of marriage is a lifetime is a success, I don't want to wait another 40 years for you parents to die :-# ). We'll just have to wait a few years to see how successful each of those marriages is.

 

 

 

From my personal standpoint, all but 1 of the dozen or so marriages of friends around 20 didn't last more than 3 years.

[Toxic388]

Most people, and parents in particular oppose different age dating for mainly one reason. The younger person in the relationship will be exposed to sex. However, many teenagers know more about sex than their parents do.

[Ginger_Warrior]

Most people, and parents in particular oppose different age dating for mainly one reason. The younger person in the relationship will be exposed to sex. However, many teenagers know more about sex than their parents do.

 

It's not as simple as that. Sex means different things depending on the level of maturity in the persons involved. Some may take it as just a feeling, some may take it as something more emotional. The feeling is that the younger you are, the more diluted that distinction becomes, and you're entering muddy waters.

 

 

 

Then there's also the whole issue of peer pressure, which is so obvious, I won't elabourate on.

[Infi]

Most people, and parents in particular oppose different age dating for mainly one reason. The younger person in the relationship will be exposed to sex. However, many teenagers know more about sex than their parents do.

 

Parents were teenagers too at some point

[deloriagod]

Most people, and parents in particular oppose different age dating for mainly one reason. The younger person in the relationship will be exposed to sex. However, many teenagers know more about sex than their parents do.

 

Parents were teenagers too at some point

 

 

 

Maybe you're a bit young to understand this but sex, like many other things, changes over time. New positions, toys, accessories, etc. are invented and change sex. The basics are still the same of course, there are just some things we do that our parents might not have done when they were our age. My parents, however, are not behind in times in terms of sex seeing as how they run multiple businesses selling products for such an act.

[Lenticular_J]

I know the current teen generation's parents will know more about sex then we do - possibly ever. They grew up in the 60's, 70's, 80's, and some 90's. Come on. Literally? ;)

 

 

 

On a related note, I never knew how many kids were having sex at my school. Not the ones I hang around with, but a lot of the stereotypes are true. It feels wierd to not be crazy and wanting to hump everything in sight. Also - when I was younger, me and my friends scoffed at the thought that people would try to do things that "got around virginity". Sex, well, ya know. But it happens. A lot.

 

 

 

'S crazy.

[Intriguing]

I just finished year 12 a few weeks ago. My year was basically a bunch of prudes in terms of sex. I kind of assumed that all the years below us at my school were like that as well, but apparently not. The little year 10s are going at it. :lol:

 

And then there's the school across the road which supposedly has the 3rd highest STD rate in NSW..

[Evaluate]

Well, as a few of you might know if you read my post, my relationship was a little unsure. I'm writing now to sort of get it off my chest that I feel like total [cabbage]. My parents basically forced me to break up with my girlfriend because "we weren't on the same level maturity-wise." She said she forgives me and knows it's not my fault, and we can still hang as friends, and I'm wondering if there's anything I should do to keep us from becoming too far apart for a second chance.

[Infi]

Most people, and parents in particular oppose different age dating for mainly one reason. The younger person in the relationship will be exposed to sex. However, many teenagers know more about sex than their parents do.

 

Parents were teenagers too at some point

 

 

 

Maybe you're a bit young to understand this but sex, like many other things, changes over time. New positions, toys, accessories, etc. are invented and change sex. The basics are still the same of course, there are just some things we do that our parents might not have done when they were our age. My parents, however, are not behind in times in terms of sex seeing as how they run multiple businesses selling products for such an act.

 

Bit young? I'm pretty much an old geezer :lol:

[Returned3]

Guys, I'm in deep trouble now. Apparently someone used my name and spammed the girl I like's blog chatbox with message such as "Hey babe wassup, wanna have sex" etc. Now I only found out this morning at 10am, while the message was posted during 12am.

 

 

 

I have posted an apology on her chatbox and I plan to explain things to her during school later on. (I'd never expect to confess in such a way).

 

 

 

Are there any other advices?

[Rebdragon]

If you aren't a douchebag there's no need to worry.

[Ouchy]

Returned, you have already done the right thing. If you wanted to do anymore, then you could buy her some flowers, but that will make you seem desperate, or you will get in her good books. :thumbup:

[MotherBrainII]

Guys, I'm in deep trouble now. Apparently someone used my name and spammed the girl I like's blog chatbox with message such as "Hey babe wassup, wanna have sex" etc. Now I only found out this morning at 10am, while the message was posted during 12am.

 

 

 

I have posted an apology on her chatbox and I plan to explain things to her during school later on. (I'd never expect to confess in such a way).

 

 

 

Are there any other advices?

 

 

 

Just explain. If there's no way of checking who it is, she'll know how easy it is for people to impersonate others and act accordingly.

 

Anyway, can someone give me some general advice on flirting? Whenever a try I always seem to be taken too seriously.

[Toxic388]

 

Anyway, can someone give me some general advice on flirting? Whenever a try I always seem to be taken too seriously.

 

 

 

Develop a joke attitude. Laugh at them jokingly when they do something such as trip or drop something. As far as myself, I don't even realize that I flirt. But I can see a girl who likes me and I will flirt with her, even if i'm not interested. If a girl is not interested in me, I will not, however flirt with her. I have been established through my friends and at my work as someone who can always make people laugh and can relieve tension.

[deloriagod]

 

Anyway, can someone give me some general advice on flirting? Whenever a try I always seem to be taken too seriously.

 

 

 

Develop a joke attitude. Laugh at them jokingly when they do something such as trip or drop something. As far as myself, I don't even realize that I flirt. But I can see a girl who likes me and I will flirt with her, even if i'm not interested. If a girl is not interested in me, I will not, however flirt with her. I have been established through my friends and at my work as someone who can always make people laugh and can relieve tension.

 

 

 

This is probably my favorite way of flirting. It's very innocent yet you can show interest and have a little fun. Make sure to keep it light hearted though, don't push your luck with things that are too "out there".

[someone111]

This is not my account, im someone from the MM&T board. Im using this account for reasons I cannot tell publicly. If any of you want to know who I am PM me and if I know who you are I'll tell you.

 

 

 

A few weeks ago I discovered that I may be bi, I haven't told anyone in rl about this though. There is this guy from my school that I like who is only one month older than me. The problem is that, as far as I know, he's straight. There is also this girl from my school that I like who is a year younger than me, the problem is that she has a boyfriend. Also, my best friend keeps telling me that I need to get a gf and that he will introduce me to some girls if I want to. At this point, I don't know what to do. Im a teenager so I'd like to know if this bi thing is just a stage of my life? Also, would a gf help me get my mind off from this guy I like?

 

 

 

Any help would be great. Also, I'd like to know Cyco's opinion on this if it's possible. Thanks in advance for any help, it will be very appreciated.

[Kenshinjapan]

This is not my account, im someone from the MM&T board. Im using this account for reasons I cannot tell publicly. If any of you want to know who I am PM me and if I know who you are I'll tell you.

 

 

 

A few weeks ago I discovered that I may be bi, I haven't told anyone in rl about this though. There is this guy from my school that I like who is only one month older than me. The problem is that, as far as I know, he's straight. There is also this girl from my school that I like who is a year younger than me, the problem is that she has a boyfriend. Also, my best friend keeps telling me that I need to get a gf and that he will introduce me to some girls if I want to. At this point, I don't know what to do. Im a teenager so I'd like to know if this bi thing is just a stage of my life? Also, would a gf help me get my attention off from this guy I like?

 

 

 

Any help would be great. Also, I'd like to know Cyco's opinion on this if it's possible. Thanks in advance for any help, it will be very appreciated.

 

 

 

If you don't have a clue that this guy's gay or not, don't embaress him (and yourself) by putting him on the spot.

 

 

 

It's just high school, just wait a few weeks until that girl breaks up with her boyfriend.

 

 

 

Don't let your friend pound you into getting a girlfriend. You don't need to have one all the time (at all, for that matter).

 

 

 

Never use a girl you don't like as an object to make another girl jealous, that's just being a jerk.

 

 

 

This bi thing is probably a stage. You're a teenager and your hormones are crazy, a lot of kids let their hormones get the best of them and let them make decisions they regret the rest of their lives. Just remember, don't do anything you're doing just because of a "feeling" you're having in the most whacked out time of your life.

[justin_m23]

I think the only reasonable thing to do would be to have a threesome with The girl and her boyfriend.

 

 

 

Or you know, just control yourself and do what kenshinjapan said.