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"I want a girlfriend/boyfriend", and other such relationship advice


Da_Latios

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How does sex "naturally happen" anyway?

 

Doesn't somebody propose sex and the other accepts or rejects? If the woman has any sense of traditionalist roles, then the man has to propose it. Meaning, he has set his goal and he is going to do what he can to achieve it. You DO something.

 

Doing it "naturally" seems to not do anything, waiting for the other to do something.

 

Someone care to enlighten me to how exactly "naturally happening" and "until we're both comfortable" means?

 

I won't bother clarifying. Call me a fool or whatever you will, but I know exactly what's happening for me and I wouldn't change a damn thing.

not even to give yrself like the power of flight or heat vision or anything?

 

weak

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sleep like dead men

wake up like dead men

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How does sex "naturally happen" anyway?

 

Doesn't somebody propose sex and the other accepts or rejects? If the woman has any sense of traditionalist roles, then the man has to propose it. Meaning, he has set his goal and he is going to do what he can to achieve it. You DO something.

 

Doing it "naturally" seems to not do anything, waiting for the other to do something.

 

Someone care to enlighten me to how exactly "naturally happening" and "until we're both comfortable" means?

 

I won't bother clarifying. Call me a fool or whatever you will, but I know exactly what's happening for me and I wouldn't change a damn thing.

He's not questioning what you're doing I think, just asking a general question out of curiosity.

 

@Lang: So I imagine you've found your answers for every section of that list, correct?

Matt: You want that eh? You want everything good for you. You want everything that's--falls off garbage can

Camera guy: Whoa, haha, are you okay dude?

Matt: You want anything funny that happens, don't you?

Camera guy: still laughing

Matt: You want the funny shit that happens here and there, you think it comes out of your [bleep]ing [wagon] pushes garbage can down, don't you? You think it's funny? It comes out of here! running towards Camera guy

Camera guy: runs away still laughing

Matt: You think the funny comes out of your mother[bleep]ing creativity? Comes out of Satan, mother[bleep]er! nn--ngh! pushes Camera guy down

Camera guy: Hoooholy [bleep]!

Matt: FUNNY ISN'T REAL! FUNNY ISN'T REAL!

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To me, it's all about happiness. If The_Gabe is really happy - leave him be. He's happy. Don't take that away from him. When it becomes an issue, then we're hear to discuss his options. But for now, he knows what he wants and he's going to learn from it when the consequences role out, whether they be good or bad.

 

Natural sex is the best kind (no that's not a condom joke). Planning for it isn't nearly as fun as the unspoken expectation and achievement. Sexting/phone sex before a first date improves your odds like 100 fold. And god is it awesome.

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Anyone who likes tacos is incapable of logic.

Anyone who likes logic is incapable of tacos.

 

PSA: SaqPrets is an Estonian Dude

Steam: NippleBeardTM

Origin: Brand_New_iPwn

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Happiness is only a reflection of how you feel at that particular moment in time. It's not an indication that in the future, you will continue to be happy, or that with hindsight, you've done things "right" now.

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To me, it's all about happiness. If The_Gabe is really happy - leave him be. He's happy. Don't take that away from him. When it becomes an issue, then we're hear to discuss his options. But for now, he knows what he wants and he's going to learn from it when the consequences role out, whether they be good or bad.

 

A big part of happiness is making smart decisions such that you'll also be happy in the future. Some people just think, "Sure I'll be miserable in the future as a result of my decisions, but I'm happy right now! To hell with the future!"

 

Not necessarily saying that's what Gabe's doing right now... just saying that simply because Gabe's happy right now doesn't mean he's making a wise decision.

 

But considering he's only 17 I don't really see the harm in letting him touch the stove for the first time to see what happens :P

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I (as you've all noticed by now) don't learn lessons (or anything really) until I experience them first hand. I say turn the stove on, leave him in the kitchen and see what happens. Maybe he won't touch it. Maybe we need to burn ourselves a few times before we realize there's an off button.

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Anyone who likes tacos is incapable of logic.

Anyone who likes logic is incapable of tacos.

 

PSA: SaqPrets is an Estonian Dude

Steam: NippleBeardTM

Origin: Brand_New_iPwn

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Blew up on my latest crazy via facebook message because I knew I'd back down too easy if I heard her voice. I think I've finally freed myself.

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Quote

Anyone who likes tacos is incapable of logic.

Anyone who likes logic is incapable of tacos.

 

PSA: SaqPrets is an Estonian Dude

Steam: NippleBeardTM

Origin: Brand_New_iPwn

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Trying to juggle deepening my relationship with someone before the semester ends along with the piles of work that are accompanying the end of the semester is proving to be incredibly difficult.

 

Like, I've had to put even asking her for coffee on hold due to multiple papers and the like jumping up and demanding my time. I'll be annoyed if schoolwork ends up killing this. If it's going to not happen I want it to be because I [bleep]ed it up, because at least then I can learn something.

The only difference between Hitler and the man next door who comes home and beats his kids every day is circumstance. The intent is the same-- to harm others.

[hide=Tifers say the darndest things]

I told her there was a secret method to doing it - and there is - but my once nimble and agile fingers were unable to perform because I was under the influence.

I would laugh, not hate. I'm a male. :(

Since when was Ireland an island...? :wall:

I actually have a hobby of licking public toilet seats.

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How many hoops are appropriate to jump through before you feel you're fighting a losing battle?

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Quote

Anyone who likes tacos is incapable of logic.

Anyone who likes logic is incapable of tacos.

 

PSA: SaqPrets is an Estonian Dude

Steam: NippleBeardTM

Origin: Brand_New_iPwn

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I was hoping for a general answer, but lets give a scenario:

 

1. meet girl

2. get told shes still getting over her ex

3. challenge accepted (first mistake)

4. do very inconvenient favors for her (second mistake is assuming niceness translates to attraction)

5. ask for nothing in return (third mistake in not being clear with intentions)

6. end up driving an extra 2 hours to drop her and her ex back at her house so they can travel together out of state for a huge party the next day (too many mistakes to even list)

 

-

 

On a persona note, I'm mad as shit, but mostly at myself. I project it on her which isn't good, but if my life were a TV show and ya'll saw every move i've made and every response she's given me...I feel I'm pretty justified.

Quote

 

Quote

Anyone who likes tacos is incapable of logic.

Anyone who likes logic is incapable of tacos.

 

PSA: SaqPrets is an Estonian Dude

Steam: NippleBeardTM

Origin: Brand_New_iPwn

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I was hoping for a general answer, but lets give a scenario:

 

okay

 

1. meet girl

 

okay

 

2. get told shes still getting over her ex

 

okay

 

3. challenge accepted (first mistake)

 

Reminds me of this thread: http://www.pua-zone.com/showthread.php?2541-Thrill-of-the-Hunt-men-vs-Pleasure-of-Sex-men

 

You're definitely in the "thrill of the hunt" category :P I mean, as long as you're having fun pursuing her, then that's fine...

 

4. do very inconvenient favors for her (second mistake is assuming niceness translates to attraction)

 

Yeah... what exactly has she done for you to "deserve" your favors? Besides look hot? :P

 

5. ask for nothing in return (third mistake in not being clear with intentions)

 

Well just to be clear, you never actually ask for "something" :P You make a move and then if she rejects it, you move on to other hot girls. As opposed to continually trying to buy her affection with favors, gifts, and attention

 

6. end up driving an extra 2 hours to drop her and her ex back at her house so they can travel together out of state for a huge party the next day (too many mistakes to even list)

 

What were you thinking?! lol

 

On a persona note, I'm mad as shit, but mostly at myself. I project it on her which isn't good, but if my life were a TV show and ya'll saw every move i've made and every response she's given me...I feel I'm pretty justified.

 

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I think people misunderstood me. When I said propose sex, not really in the "Milady, would you like to foriniate at 7th o'clock tonight?". More like "I got a date tonight, I'm going to pull my weight to influence her into bed". You, mentally, have a goal and are trying to achieve it.

 

Waiting until it feels right, to me, sounds like not establishing the goal and waiting for it to happen with no effort or by the effort of the other partner (mostly ladies).

 

I'm I missing something or is the 'establishing the goal' part into "natural" sex?

"The cry of the poor is not always just, but if you never hear it you'll never know what justice is."

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Rpg why are you still in contact with her?

Matt: You want that eh? You want everything good for you. You want everything that's--falls off garbage can

Camera guy: Whoa, haha, are you okay dude?

Matt: You want anything funny that happens, don't you?

Camera guy: still laughing

Matt: You want the funny shit that happens here and there, you think it comes out of your [bleep]ing [wagon] pushes garbage can down, don't you? You think it's funny? It comes out of here! running towards Camera guy

Camera guy: runs away still laughing

Matt: You think the funny comes out of your mother[bleep]ing creativity? Comes out of Satan, mother[bleep]er! nn--ngh! pushes Camera guy down

Camera guy: Hoooholy [bleep]!

Matt: FUNNY ISN'T REAL! FUNNY ISN'T REAL!

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I think people misunderstood me. When I said propose sex, not really in the "Milady, would you like to foriniate at 7th o'clock tonight?". More like "I got a date tonight, I'm going to pull my weight to influence her into bed". You, mentally, have a goal and are trying to achieve it.

 

Waiting until it feels right, to me, sounds like not establishing the goal and waiting for it to happen with no effort or by the effort of the other partner (mostly ladies).

 

I'm I missing something or is the 'establishing the goal' part into "natural" sex?

 

This would be the biggest mistake I could ever do besides cheating on her at this point in time. You might not understand it but I know my situation. My goal every night is to make her smile, not make her [bleep].

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Three months banishment to 9gag is something i would never wish upon anybody, not even my worst enemy.

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I think people misunderstood me. When I said propose sex, not really in the "Milady, would you like to foriniate at 7th o'clock tonight?". More like "I got a date tonight, I'm going to pull my weight to influence her into bed". You, mentally, have a goal and are trying to achieve it.

 

Waiting until it feels right, to me, sounds like not establishing the goal and waiting for it to happen with no effort or by the effort of the other partner (mostly ladies).

 

I'm I missing something or is the 'establishing the goal' part into "natural" sex?

 

This would be the biggest mistake I could ever do besides cheating on her at this point in time. You might not understand it but I know my situation. My goal every night is to make her smile, not make her [bleep].

 

I'm relatively sure that almost everybody in this thread understands exactly what you're going through right now. :P

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OK, I can understand that. Muggi's right, I've been a 17 year old lad in a relationship, I know the situation.

 

If the roles were reversed, and it was you wanting to abstain, would she be as altruistic as you are being now about wanting to make you happy, even if it's inconveniencing her and neglecting her from what she desires from the relationship? If she would be OK with that, go for it. If you don't think she would be prepared to do that for you, think more deeply about how much you're tolerating this just to keep her all loved up to yourself.

 

You don't need to reply. I know I can trust you to work through the answer by yourself.

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@Muggiw

What is an AFC man exactly? I hate the stupid lingo, but I enjoy the philosophical debates behind it.

 

Rpg why are you still in contact with her?

 

I question this myself sometimes. I put the ball in her court to call me back. She didn't. I could have left it at that, but I ended up calling her to apologize for being so mad all the time. I don't think I'll be hanging around her or talking to her again though. At least that's what I'm trying for. I really don't need the triggers she sets off all the time. The window of happiness I had with her seems to have locked shut.

 

17 hoops

 

at least you didn't fix her printer homes

 

<3

Quote

 

Quote

Anyone who likes tacos is incapable of logic.

Anyone who likes logic is incapable of tacos.

 

PSA: SaqPrets is an Estonian Dude

Steam: NippleBeardTM

Origin: Brand_New_iPwn

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@Muggiw

What is an AFC man exactly? I hate the stupid lingo, but I enjoy the philosophical debates behind it.

 

An average frustrated chump. Basically someone who isn't getting what he wants out of his relationships with women--whether it be sex, love, security, etc. Usually he just doesn't know any better and has been brainwashed by society to behave in a certain way that ultimately sets him up for failure, frustration, disappointment, and unhappiness.

 

I question this myself sometimes. I put the ball in her court to call me back. She didn't. I could have left it at that, but I ended up calling her to apologize for being so mad all the time. I don't think I'll be hanging around her or talking to her again though. At least that's what I'm trying for. I really don't need the triggers she sets off all the time. The window of happiness I had with her seems to have locked shut.

 

Well you know what they say-- when one door of happiness closes, another door of drama opens :twss:

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@Muggiw

What is an AFC man exactly? I hate the stupid lingo, but I enjoy the philosophical debates behind it.

 

Rpg why are you still in contact with her?

 

I question this myself sometimes. I put the ball in her court to call me back. She didn't. I could have left it at that, but I ended up calling her to apologize for being so mad all the time. I don't think I'll be hanging around her or talking to her again though. At least that's what I'm trying for. I really don't need the triggers she sets off all the time. The window of happiness I had with her seems to have locked shut.

That's not how cutting contact works. There is no ball. And if you put the ball in her court (something you do when you don't want to cut contact but want to affirm authority) and she doesn't hit it back, you don't go under the net, grab the ball and try again. It just makes you look flip-floppity.

Matt: You want that eh? You want everything good for you. You want everything that's--falls off garbage can

Camera guy: Whoa, haha, are you okay dude?

Matt: You want anything funny that happens, don't you?

Camera guy: still laughing

Matt: You want the funny shit that happens here and there, you think it comes out of your [bleep]ing [wagon] pushes garbage can down, don't you? You think it's funny? It comes out of here! running towards Camera guy

Camera guy: runs away still laughing

Matt: You think the funny comes out of your mother[bleep]ing creativity? Comes out of Satan, mother[bleep]er! nn--ngh! pushes Camera guy down

Camera guy: Hoooholy [bleep]!

Matt: FUNNY ISN'T REAL! FUNNY ISN'T REAL!

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Rpg I'd reread this: http://blackdragonbl...ss-and-oneitis/

 

I'm writing a big-ass post regarding points 3 and 4 for my blog, I'll share it here when I'm done. If you've got a big mission/purpose in your life, then it's really hard to get needy and unhappy because you've got bigger fish to fry, so to speak. And that's not limited to unhappiness regarding women either :D

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I don't want to say I've fallen ill with oneitis again, but it seems that way I guess. I'll go off and school myself some...

 

I love your analogy Omar haha

Quote

 

Quote

Anyone who likes tacos is incapable of logic.

Anyone who likes logic is incapable of tacos.

 

PSA: SaqPrets is an Estonian Dude

Steam: NippleBeardTM

Origin: Brand_New_iPwn

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Omar what sport are you thinking of in your analogy? Volleyball? I mean, I think it'd make more sense to either go over or around the net to retrieve the ball if we're talking about tennis. And if we're talking about ping pong then it'd definitely be better to walk around to the other side of the table to get the ball than to climb onto the table and try squeezing under the net and risk damaging the table.

 

These are the kinds of things that keep me up at night.

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^Watch out Muggi I can't handle it when you guys get this deep.

The only difference between Hitler and the man next door who comes home and beats his kids every day is circumstance. The intent is the same-- to harm others.

[hide=Tifers say the darndest things]

I told her there was a secret method to doing it - and there is - but my once nimble and agile fingers were unable to perform because I was under the influence.

I would laugh, not hate. I'm a male. :(

Since when was Ireland an island...? :wall:

I actually have a hobby of licking public toilet seats.

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