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"I want a girlfriend/boyfriend", and other such relationship advice


Da_Latios

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I erased my Tinder profile.

Might have to reopen it, again...

t3aGt.png

 

So I've noticed this thread's regulars all follow similar trends.

 

RPG is constantly dealing with psycho exes.

Muggi reminds us of the joys of polygamy.

Saq is totally oblivious to how much chicks dig him.

I strike out every other week.

Kalphite wages a war against the friend zone.

Randox pretty much stays rational.

Etc, etc

 

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I'll instantly get monogamous if I ever date a girl named Elvira

 

 

Ha ha my grandma's called Elvira.

 

Somewhere back in this thread there's a quote of Muggi mentioning he has nothing against older women... This is the perfect thing to add to our south american soap opera. Saqprets is with Elvira but he betrayed her trust somehow, meanwhile ladies man muggi has a serious crush on Elvira and would give up his philandering ways to start a relationship with her.

 

Now we just gotta figure out how crocefisso fits into this, besides being Elvira's grandson. Maybe he's on really good terms with saqprets but that will change when he finds out what saqprets did, and has threatened to challenge muggi to a duel if muggi seriously tries to go for Elvira because he doesn't believe muggi is good enough for her.

 

This is off to a good start.

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your article was the equivalent of a circumcized porcupine

The only thing wrong with it is the lack of a percentage for when you need to stroke it.

 


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#Elviraisintheright

 

Whatever Elvira chooses should be respected - we are not barbarians after-all.

 

Well, I am not one to blame the magic 8-ball, but it DID say you may rely on it.

 

EDIT:

 

Cute girl on Tinder has a tengwar tattoo, I compliment it. She responds "Tengwar???". I retreat back into the hole from whence I came.

Luck be a Lady

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Aaaand I got the "We should be friends" card...

She told me she can't tell me anything to my face, it is so difficult, so I kissed her and went for one more lap (I was running). She called me immediately about if I didn't want to hear what she thought. I replied I'll listen when I finish my lap, you can't leave the park so quickly. So I finished my lap, she told me we are friends now, even though it is hard, and that I should have been or should be more of a dick. Do more and be more confident.

I just kissed her again, and ran back home.

 

She sent me a message to not listen to other stuff she said. About how I should change and told me that I should stay the same and those changes would have only worked for us.

I replied, yolo, I didn't listen to what you said then.

Me roommate, who is pretty much muggi in his ways, told me that it ain't over yet, it's gonna be fun.

 

I don't know what to think.

t3aGt.png

 

So I've noticed this thread's regulars all follow similar trends.

 

RPG is constantly dealing with psycho exes.

Muggi reminds us of the joys of polygamy.

Saq is totally oblivious to how much chicks dig him.

I strike out every other week.

Kalphite wages a war against the friend zone.

Randox pretty much stays rational.

Etc, etc

 

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You mean I should move onto next one?

She kept teasing me with that she knows of one girl who likes me...

But I don't want next one yet, at least while she is so open-ended atm :D

t3aGt.png

 

So I've noticed this thread's regulars all follow similar trends.

 

RPG is constantly dealing with psycho exes.

Muggi reminds us of the joys of polygamy.

Saq is totally oblivious to how much chicks dig him.

I strike out every other week.

Kalphite wages a war against the friend zone.

Randox pretty much stays rational.

Etc, etc

 

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Again, I will say as a long time lurker that in this thread you learn so much. Alongside that it is a general source of amusement. I thank all users for their insights and views as well as amusing commentary.

 

On a side note can I be a recurring character on the soap opera? Maybe like a neighbour or something?

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You mean I should move onto next one?

She kept teasing me with that she knows of one girl who likes me...

But I don't want next one yet, at least while she is so open-ended atm :D

 

Unless she's in your social circle and/or unavoidable, I'm saying you should just cut off all contact with her and start seeing other girls. Don't respond to any texts or phone calls from her. If you want, you can tell her you're cutting off contact with her. As Riku pointed out, she made it pretty clear that she has no interest in moving forward with you.

 

You can reinitiate contact with her after ~3 months of radio silence and absolutely zero communication to her if you want.

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Well it looks like I really am going to have to end things with this girl (no muggi, we still haven't banged) She's becoming increasingly distant again and there's not even the excuse of school or work this time.

 

So in the meantime, anyone got any ideas for first dates? I'm looking for things that allow you to get to know each other better while also actually giving you something to do. Best I've got is feeding ducks.

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If you have snow, then call out for a snowfight and get a cup of hot chocolate or something afterwards.

If she is sporty, go for a jog in a park/forest/whatever.

I am seriously torn apart to 2 right now... One half of me wants to do as muggi said (which is pretty much impossible, we share friends and are on the academic landscape so we have lots of common events), and the other half wants to do as my flatmate said...

She didn't really want to tell me to just be friends and she wanted me to kiss her again and again and do something more. But she just doesn't like drama. At all.

 

Otherwise I wouldn't be so conflicted...

t3aGt.png

 

So I've noticed this thread's regulars all follow similar trends.

 

RPG is constantly dealing with psycho exes.

Muggi reminds us of the joys of polygamy.

Saq is totally oblivious to how much chicks dig him.

I strike out every other week.

Kalphite wages a war against the friend zone.

Randox pretty much stays rational.

Etc, etc

 

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Well it looks like I really am going to have to end things with this girl (no muggi, we still haven't banged) She's becoming increasingly distant again and there's not even the excuse of school or work this time.

 

So in the meantime, anyone got any ideas for first dates? I'm looking for things that allow you to get to know each other better while also actually giving you something to do. Best I've got is feeding ducks.

Just stick with coffee or drinks. Don't make this any more complicated than it needs to be lol

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I think the drama now merits its own theme tune, straight from greenest Paraguay.

 

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"Imagine yourself surrounded by the most horrible cripples and maniacs it is possible to conceive, and you may understand a little of my feelings with these grotesque caricatures of humanity about me."

- H.G. Wells, The Island of Doctor Moreau

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Cute girl on Tinder has a tengwar tattoo, I compliment it. She responds "Tengwar???". I retreat back into the hole from whence I came.

 

Having a tattoo and not understanding its entire meaning is so frustrating to me. If it was truly Elvish, you were totally in the right to call her on it.

 

 

If you have snow, then call out for a snowfight and get a cup of hot chocolate or something afterwards.

If she is sporty, go for a jog in a park/forest/whatever.

I am seriously torn apart to 2 right now... One half of me wants to do as muggi said (which is pretty much impossible, we share friends and are on the academic landscape so we have lots of common events), and the other half wants to do as my flatmate said...

She didn't really want to tell me to just be friends and she wanted me to kiss her again and again and do something more. But she just doesn't like drama. At all.

 

Otherwise I wouldn't be so conflicted...

 

 

Ignore her. Hard. Continue life as if she'd never crossed it. It'll make you super attractive* because women are crazy and this actually works, trust me.

 

*to her, and other females so long as you only phrase it in a positive way with no negative talk about yourself or the other girl

 

 

 

Also, can you guys help me with my tinder pictures? Here is the album of pictures I've been using. Currently my profile just has the first two in the album (I cropped the girls out of the second one aside from some peripheral parts I couldn't manage haha), though I've generally been rotating between those five. Idk any advice is welcome, if there's something that's blatantly missing I can try to fix that as well. I'm just at the point where tinder barely shows me any new profiles on campus anymore but I'm still barely getting matches even from indiscriminately swiping right (i'm averaging like one a week-ish lol and I feel like that's really low). Idk any advice is welcome. Currently my profile text is just my school and year.

 

 

Only use 5th and 2nd pictures. Do not crop female friends out of your photo, girls seeing that girls like spending time with you will encourage them to trust you. After all, if she gets along with him...so could I. I say the 5th over any other as your primary selfie because you're dressed extra nice and it makes you look like your not just some aimless 20 something. Find yourself a 3rd picture that depicts something you're good at or adds to your attractive value (ie: driving, you next to your nice car if you have one, you at work with someone fancy, playing an instrument...etc). Maybe also add something a little less robotic to your bio. Even if its something like "not here to waste time" or a silly quote you find yourself saying. School and year is pretty basic, and possibly even enough if your college is big enough, but personally I found great success in my bio only being my snapchat name. Granted, I'd graduated by the time I started tindering for sport.

 

 

also; #1 rule of Tinder for guys:

ALWAYS swipe right. Don't even look. Just swipe. You'll get matched with way more people way faster without any back-of-your-head wondering if that one that was particularly cool will match you. If she's worth your time, Tinder will match you. Trust in the Tinder gods.

Quote

 

Quote

Anyone who likes tacos is incapable of logic.

Anyone who likes logic is incapable of tacos.

 

PSA: SaqPrets is an Estonian Dude

Steam: NippleBeardTM

Origin: Brand_New_iPwn

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Well it looks like I really am going to have to end things with this girl (no muggi, we still haven't banged) She's becoming increasingly distant again and there's not even the excuse of school or work this time.

 

So in the meantime, anyone got any ideas for first dates? I'm looking for things that allow you to get to know each other better while also actually giving you something to do. Best I've got is feeding ducks.

Just stick with coffee or drinks. Don't make this any more complicated than it needs to be lol

 

The first date is supposed to set you apart from every other guy that's available and leave a lasting impression. Deviating from the norm a little bit can only help. Besides, I can't drink and I hate coffee.

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My flatmate was right.

t3aGt.png

 

So I've noticed this thread's regulars all follow similar trends.

 

RPG is constantly dealing with psycho exes.

Muggi reminds us of the joys of polygamy.

Saq is totally oblivious to how much chicks dig him.

I strike out every other week.

Kalphite wages a war against the friend zone.

Randox pretty much stays rational.

Etc, etc

 

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The first date is supposed to set you apart from every other guy that's available and leave a lasting impression. Deviating from the norm a little bit can only help.

 

That's partially correct, but most guys don't simply take girls out for drinks or coffee. Instead they treat the first date like it's a huge deal and end up wasting lots of time and money on a first date. And at the same time, they don't even try moving things forward with girls; they play it safe and hope that by having a "special" first date, that alone will make her interested in him. But that's not how life works.

 

If you want to stand out from all the other guys, the only thing you need to do is touch her and show that you're a confident and laid back guy. Don't. Make. This. Complicated.

 

If the thought of touching your date scares the shit out of you (just like it used to scare me), then you know why it's so successful: because the average guy is a [kitty] and would rather play it safe than risk being creepy by touching her! And that's why the average guy's dating life is largely out of his control.

 

Besides, I can't drink and I hate coffee.

Just order tea or dessert at Starbucks instead of coffee. :thumbup:

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Cute girl on Tinder has a tengwar tattoo, I compliment it. She responds "Tengwar???". I retreat back into the hole from whence I came.

 

Having a tattoo and not understanding its entire meaning is so frustrating to me. If it was truly Elvish, you were totally in the right to call her on it.

I rephrased the question and small-talk conversation just happened - I dropped the fact I am Australian. She doesn't believe it, I give her my phone number followed by "Find out?". She insta-calls, we end up chatting for like an hour or so before the conversation ends (my phone died :((( ). She texts after the phone-call "How long have you been single?" 

And then it all goes down hill from there (I responded fairly poorly), I might get a date out of it - not counting my eggs.

 

The tattoo in question read "Not all those who wander are lost"

Luck be a Lady

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That hour phone call probably should have been ammo for the first date, but I won't count you out of the race just yet

Quote

 

Quote

Anyone who likes tacos is incapable of logic.

Anyone who likes logic is incapable of tacos.

 

PSA: SaqPrets is an Estonian Dude

Steam: NippleBeardTM

Origin: Brand_New_iPwn

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That hour phone call probably should have been ammo for the first date, but I won't count you out of the race just yet

In all honesty I probably would have closed the phone call with trying to organize coffee or something but unforeseen circumstances.

 

Edit: I got a date.

Luck be a Lady

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@muggi do you pay on the first date?

 

I usually arrive to the date spot about 5 minutes early and either wait in my car or go walk around the area until she texts me that she's there. Then I walk in. By the time I've walked in she's already paid for her own drink so I either get my own drink if I feel like it, or I just sit down with her and don't buy anything which means my date is free.

 

In the past I'd go to bars where you don't pay the tab until the date is over, and in which case I'd pay for our drinks unless she insisted otherwise. But almost all of my dates are at Starbucks these days so I haven't paid for a girl's drink in a while.

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