I wish a special FBI agent would arrive at my apartment in his helicopter and say, "I'm from the FBI and we need your help. If you don't accept the mission or fail it, you will spend five hundred quatrillion years in military prison." Then I'd tell him, "I accept.".

Granted, but the mission was doomed to failure. Not because of your lack of skills in the field, but because the Helicopter ran out of fuel en route to HQ.

 

I wish I had some high-quality cheese to indulge in.

You have high-quality cheese but you are now lactose intolerant and get sick while you indulge.

 

I wish the world would end on Dec. 21, 2012

Granted, since everyone else moves to another world before then, nothing bad happens. Except for the fact that you die.

 

I wish I could count to trillion in one point five seconds.

Granted, your tongue burns up from the speed it has to move, your body follows as the flames spread. (whole new meaning to blazethemoviefan)

 

I wish that I needed no more than 2 hours of sleep each night.

Granted, but it doesn't account for the sleep you would need beyond taking a restroom break, then falling back into bed and sleeping for another 6 hours so that you could do other things. :twss:

 

 

I wish that my brain could multitask both more and better, without any form whatsoever of something negative happening due to it. :angry:

 

 

~D. V. "Hopefully I've made that non-corruptible." Devnull

Granted. It's not that much better than it was before.

 

I wish I had better eyesight.

Granted, you can now see into outer space, however you cannot control that power.

 

I wish to own a tree just like the talking tree in the lord of the rings movies.

Granted, you get a nice cgi prop and it can't actually do anything in real life.

 

I wish that I didn't have to ruin people's dreams so much :,(

Granted. You are now forbidden from taking part in this game.

 

I wish I could troll people telepathically a mile away.

Granted, that doesn't stop them from trolling you back.

 

I wish to become the world's most successful criminal who never has to spend time in jail and never gets shot.

Granted, but you will get stabbed... a lot. Poisoned knives too at that.

 

I wish I could craft a third option when the other two are too difficult or hindering to decide, and this option would be free of consequence.

granted, you cant hear what you think say because a plane flys over.

 

i wish for a double stuffed oreo to appear in my hand

Granted, but it's expired by two years.

 

I wish I had the powers of teleportation that I had complete control over.

Granted, you get headache every time you use that power.

 

I wish some powerful stupid would happen to me right now and I'd be immune to it.

Granted. The Vast Derping occurs all across the universe for a good 30 seconds. And in that 30 seconds, you realize the people are still smarter than you.

 

I wish people would keep to their damn promises more often.

Granted, but only the awful promises are kept.

 

I wish that by the time 2012 is over, 2013 wouldn't come but instead 2012 would recycle itself. It means I won't be able to see Man of Steel, but I am willing to take that risk.

Granted, but you must have a bi-weekly appointments to the Chiropractor... with Bane doing the art.

 

I wish my older brother was omitted from existence.

Granted, your parents never meet and therefore you are ommitted from existance aswell.

 

I wish that I could have all the wishes.

Granted, but you can't out-wish the posters here. They're simply the best there is.

 

I wish I could manipulate luck in my favor in these annoying Battle Frontier/Subway/PWT challenges.

Granted, you realize that you liked those challenges better when they had some challenge.

 

I wish the last one to post wins thread would re-open and it would never be closed again.

Granted, the forum falls apart as most of the server is devoted to hosting the massively over sized thread while it is be posted in every 5-10 seconds.

 

I wish that I had the power of a true photographic memory, never forgetting a thing that I've done, seen, or heard.

Granted, however you can't control that new power. You get your memories at an insane rate.

 

Here comes something you can't possibly screw up.

 

I wish for an empty piece of paper.

Granted. The genie says you can't have any more wishes, because of how you wasted that one.

 

I wish I could breathe fire.

Granted, you burn down your house, everyone in it, your neighbourhood, and the entire town. Afterwards you are hunted down by the US government who take you to a lab where you are poked and prodded in many bad ways.

 

I wish that I could have some cash.