Babies are born wearing a cap and gown.

Teachers live at school.

Traffic lights turn red when nobody else is there because they can detect a really fast car approaching.

Female anatomy...

I used to read the tags on pillows that said "Do not remove under penalty of law" or something similar, then think that I must be the most badass thing to ever walk the earth when I ripped them off.

Most of the usual misconceptions like woman anatomy and origin of babies.

 

I though pushing b improved tha rate of catching pokemon

 

I though that my parent heard everything i said anywhere, this stuck to me in such a way i never asid a curse word until i was like 14.

 

Cats were baby dogs.

 

Pokemon were hidden in the dephs of central park.

 

And that having a perfect whistle would net me a free bird (spend 2 weeks trying to have a good whistle until my Gramfather told me it wasn't true)

 

I once though my uncle was Santa, mainly because i once found a santa costume in his closet.

I though that my parent heard everything i said anywhere, this stuck to me in such a way i never asid a curse word until i was like 14.

 

Yeah I never swore until like 14 because I was paranoid that my parents would find out some how. It was totally irrational (and I knew it was) but I thought it anyways.

I though that my parent heard everything i said anywhere, this stuck to me in such a way i never asid a curse word until i was like 14.

 

Yeah I never swore until like 14 because I was paranoid that my parents would find out some how. It was totally irrational (and I knew it was) but I thought it anyways.

Parents yelling at kdis for swearing just encourages it anyways

Really? I've always swore quite a bit, although never at home. Back in like early middle school I would get horrified looks form kids when I'd say something like "What the hell?". Of course in like 7th grade swearing became cool and a lot of kids would swear constantly which was dumb. Luckily people don't think it makes them cool for the most part anymore.

 

I'll admit, it weirds me out a lot when I hear my friends swear around my parents. It's something I still don't do to this day, even though I don't think they'd really care anymore. I never swear around any of my friends parents either even though they obviously don't care.

Yeah I swear a lot around friends, but the most you'll hear me say in front of my parents is "crap." I'm not quite sure why.

Let us swear while we may, for in Heaven it will not be allowed.

 

-mark twain.

 

who can scold you for heeding the advice of mark twain, especially when you can quote him? No, i've always sworn as much as i've wanted, that's not a lot though.

Really? I've always swore quite a bit, although never at home. Back in like early middle school I would get horrified looks form kids when I'd say something like "What the hell?". Of course in like 7th grade swearing became cool and a lot of kids would swear constantly which was dumb. Luckily people don't think it makes them cool for the most part anymore.

 

I'll admit, it weirds me out a lot when I hear my friends swear around my parents. It's something I still don't do to this day, even though I don't think they'd really care anymore. I never swear around any of my friends parents either even though they obviously don't care.

Yea, whenever my friends are around I PRAY they don't swear around my parents, even though I do occasionally. Just kind of looks bad on me when they do, although they don't very often. If it's something like crap or low-level, then it's no big deal but other stuff isn't ok. Although we swear all of the time at school. What is REALLY horrifying to me is seeing 4th graders (or little kids in general) swear all of the time.

 

I though pushing b improved the rate of catching pokemon

 

No where in that formula is there something about pressing B.

 

I though pushing b improved the rate of catching pokemon

 

No where in that formula is there something about pressing B.

 

Which is exactly what he said! Good job!

Earlier, I was going to wash my hair in the bathroom sink, and I almost stuck my head under the stream of water (in order to get it wet for lathering with shampoo) with my glasses on. Luckily, I realized that I was about to do something stupid, so I took them off. It was a split-second type of thing, though.

 

I though pushing b improved the rate of catching pokemon

 

No where in that formula is there something about pressing B.

 

Which is exactly what he said! Good job!

Even if you know it doesn't help you still do it every time, atleast I do. I press "A" 4 times when trying to catch a pokemon, once when it goes into the ball, once when it hits the ground, again when it hits the ground, and once when it shakes the first time. For some reason I thought that helped when I was little and I still do it every time.

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I though pushing b improved the rate of catching pokemon

 

No where in that formula is there something about pressing B.

 

Which is exactly what he said! Good job!

Even if you know it doesn't help you still do it every time, atleast I do. I press "A" 4 times when trying to catch a pokemon, once when it goes into the ball, once when it hits the ground, again when it hits the ground, and once when it shakes the first time. For some reason I thought that helped when I was little and I still do it every time.

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I do the same, but I press up on the d-pad and hit b for every ball shake. Just something thats stuck with me since childhood.

Today this caller called from a hospital, her name was barbara. She had the deepest voice I've ever heard from a woman, thus I thought her name was bob. After 5 minutes she fianlly said "BARBARA B A R B A R A BARBARA I AM A WOMAN YOU [bleep]ING IDIOT" I almost bursted outta my chair laughing, I was wondering why she kept on repeating her name. I was like "sir, yes, your name is bob" Then she'd say "No. BARBARA!" but it sounded like she said "No. BOB!"(Note, she was very old and slurring her words"

 

 

Another one, seriously freaked me out

 

 

You know how if you smoke too much you get those robotic voices? Yea... One called. [cabbage]. freaked the [bleep] out of me.

Earlier, I was going to wash my hair in the bathroom sink, and I almost stuck my head under the stream of water (in order to get it wet for lathering with shampoo) with my glasses on. Luckily, I realized that I was about to do something stupid, so I took them off. It was a split-second type of thing, though.

 

I accidentally shower with my glasses on. A lot.

 

I don't even realise I'm doing it,

^So, I've had the wrong definition for 'schizophrenia' in my internal dictionary for ages.

It makes you wonder how many times you've made an arse of yourselff.

 

Actually, I've come to learn that the vast majority of this planet's population has no idea what Schitzophrenia really is... so it's likely nobody ever knew you were wrong.

Pish posh stop being so schizophrenic Romy.

 

 

 

 

get it

I used to think that all women had "peepees" when I was really young.

 

Yeah me too, until grade 1 when I played the age old 'show each other your junk' game with a neighbor.

 

My first thought was "idk what it is, but it's awesome'

I used to think the world was actually in black and white (I remember mentioning this somewhere else lol)

 

I do a lot of stupid stuff, I luckily forget most of it though.

When I was in Germany I met an American girl at a bar who asked me if we had electricity in Sweden. When I mentioned we also make cars she was genuinely shocked. So I just rolled with it and said the reason there are only 9 million people living here is because polar bears kill most of our infants. In order to keep our population from declining, it is a mother's duty to just push out as many babies as possible - because at least half of them will be killed by the infant-killing polar bears roaming our streets. Unghh.

When I was in Germany I met an American girl at a bar who asked me if we had electricity in Sweden. When I mentioned we also make cars she was genuinely shocked. So I just rolled with it and said the reason there are only 9 million people living here is because polar bears kill most of our infants. In order to keep our population from declining, it is a mother's duty to just push out as many babies as possible - because at least half of them will be killed by the infant-killing polar bears roaming our streets. Unghh.

I apologize for her idiocy, most of us aren't that stupid.

 

I do the same, but I press up on the d-pad and hit b for every ball shake. Just something thats stuck with me since childhood.

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Plenty of people did it. I did, and it always seemed to work...

When I was in Germany I met an American girl at a bar who asked me if we had electricity in Sweden. When I mentioned we also make cars she was genuinely shocked. So I just rolled with it and said the reason there are only 9 million people living here is because polar bears kill most of our infants. In order to keep our population from declining, it is a mother's duty to just push out as many babies as possible - because at least half of them will be killed by the infant-killing polar bears roaming our streets. Unghh.

I apologize for her idiocy, some of us aren't that stupid.

 

She sounds frustrating...

 

I guess she was a spy trying to discover the wonders of Superior German Engineering? :wink:

I have a very bad habit of losing stuff. Especially something I need for studying for school. I once lost 3 copies of a test during one lesson. Teacher got seriously mad at me. I still don't know where the heck did I manage to get them to.