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Celebrity Deathmatch


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Fight 10 - Jesus vs Santa  

35 members have voted

  1. 1. Who would win in a fight to the death?

    • Jesus
      16
    • Santa
      19


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Though Palin can hunt, I imagine Bachmann ambushing her in the prairie and suffocating her by ramming the US census down her throat.


"Imagine yourself surrounded by the most horrible cripples and maniacs it is possible to conceive, and you may understand a little of my feelings with these grotesque caricatures of humanity about me."

- H.G. Wells, The Island of Doctor Moreau

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Palin.

 

She kills bears with her bare hands.

Quote

 

Quote

Anyone who likes tacos is incapable of logic.

Anyone who likes logic is incapable of tacos.

 

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Fight #2 Aftermath:

Sarah Palin and Michele Bachmann entered the arena together, side by side, to a chant of "Drill Baby Drill!" With tea partiers working themselves into a frenzy, shots could be heard from automatic weapons in the cheap seats. This calmed enough people down for one of the two (Can't be sure which one) to begin addressing the crowds, talking about government waste, constitutional principals, and invoking the name of Ronald Reagan several times. Later it became evident that this was Bachmann, after Palin took the microphone and began talking about how she could see Russia from her house.

 

The fight began, and immediately Bachmann called Palin a RINO. The two began clawing, moments later Sarah Palin revealed her true form, quite literally a mother grizzly bear! As Palin was transforming, Bachmann could be seen quite visibly shaking, fury and rage building inside her. Beams of intense energy shot out of her eyes, singing Palin's fur. Palin took one swipe with her giant paw, crumpling Bachmann to the ground.

 

Winner: Palin, 15-7.

 

 

Fight #3, Karl Marx versus Adam Smith.

 

Wikipedia Pages here:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Adam_smith

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Karl_marx

 

Remarks about the pre-fight:

A couple of the greatest thinkers of their time, Adam Smith is known as the father of capitalism, Karl Marx is known as the one of the principal architects of modern social science. Smith formed the basis for the "invisible hand," while Marx spent his lifetime describing the shortcomings of capitalism and promoting a stateless, classless society. Two great thinkers, two opposing ideas.

 

Pages of interest here:

http://www.encyclopedia.com/topic/Adam_Smith.aspx

http://www.enotes.com/topics/karl-marx

99 dungeoneering achieved, thanks to everyone that celebrated with me!

 

♪♪ Don't interrupt me as I struggle to complete this thought
Have some respect for someone more forgetful than yourself ♪♪

♪♪ And I'm not done
And I won't be till my head falls off ♪♪

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Adam Smith. He looks like a total badass.

 

Btw, can you make a post announcing the new fight either in the results post or a post directly after?

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Adam Smith. He looks like a total badass.

 

Btw, can you make a post announcing the new fight either in the results post or a post directly after?

Yeah, I can do that.

99 dungeoneering achieved, thanks to everyone that celebrated with me!

 

♪♪ Don't interrupt me as I struggle to complete this thought
Have some respect for someone more forgetful than yourself ♪♪

♪♪ And I'm not done
And I won't be till my head falls off ♪♪

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Seeing as capitalism beat communism in the historical arena, it's only natural to assume that Smith would do the same to Marx.


"Imagine yourself surrounded by the most horrible cripples and maniacs it is possible to conceive, and you may understand a little of my feelings with these grotesque caricatures of humanity about me."

- H.G. Wells, The Island of Doctor Moreau

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Fight #3, Karl Marx versus Adam Smith

Aftermath:

As soon as the bell rang signalling the start of the fight, something amazing happened. Adam Smith began summoning the power of the invisible hand. As Smith was chanting encantations, Marx began summoning the common man. The unionized people in the audience, all the arena staff and workers began assembling and marching towards the ring, singing in unison, "Solidarity Forever". As the first union workers made it to the ring a curious thing occurred. Something began picking the workers up, and tossing them away.

 

The invisible hand had been summoned! As the invisible hand was taking care of the unions, Smith turned his focus onto Marx. A fist-fight ensued, a classic brawl. Marx went for a quick one-two, Smith countered and connected squarely with an uppercut to the chin. Marx went down hard. At that point we can only assume the invisible hand focused on Marx, as he began turning blue in the face. A final shudder, and Marx was dead.

 

Winner: Smith, 12-9.

 

Fight #4, Thomas Edison versus Nikola Tesla

 

Wikipedia pages here:

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Thomas_Edison

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nikola_Tesla

 

Remarks about the pre-fight:

Between the two of them, more than 1,700 patents were granted. Some interesting facts, Edison is usually credited with inventing the lightbulb (instead he only improved upon it); Tesla invented the radio (the USPTO reversed its decision, later to be reinstated by the Supreme Court) but doesn't get credit. Edison favored direct current, Tesla favored alternating current.

 

Pages of interest here:

http://www.neatorama.com/2008/02/11/10-fascinating-facts-about-edison/

http://proavmagazine.com/pro-av-articles/fascinating-facts-about-nikola-tesla.aspx

99 dungeoneering achieved, thanks to everyone that celebrated with me!

 

♪♪ Don't interrupt me as I struggle to complete this thought
Have some respect for someone more forgetful than yourself ♪♪

♪♪ And I'm not done
And I won't be till my head falls off ♪♪

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Tesla it is.


"Imagine yourself surrounded by the most horrible cripples and maniacs it is possible to conceive, and you may understand a little of my feelings with these grotesque caricatures of humanity about me."

- H.G. Wells, The Island of Doctor Moreau

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Because of his eccentric personality and his seemingly unbelievable and sometimes bizarre claims about possible scientific and technological developments, Tesla was ultimately ostracized and regarded as a mad scientist by many late in his life.

 

Tesla indeed.

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☢ CAUTION ☢ CAUTION ☢ CAUTION ☢ CAUTION ☢

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I chose Edison, simply because Edison 1-up'd Tesla many times in real life, and did a very good job of destroying him. We learn about Edison in 1st grade, not Tesla.

99 dungeoneering achieved, thanks to everyone that celebrated with me!

 

♪♪ Don't interrupt me as I struggle to complete this thought
Have some respect for someone more forgetful than yourself ♪♪

♪♪ And I'm not done
And I won't be till my head falls off ♪♪

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Tesla probably invented a time machine but decided against using it for fear of paradox.

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