fastortoise

Two years ago I was stumbling home drunk with a bunch of friends when I noticed a floating ladder in the middle of a construction site we were passing by. I just stood there staring at it in awe, and when my friends noticed we decided to go investigate. It turns out it was being held up by a crane, and since we absolutely had to get it down, we tried hijacking the crane. Unsurprisingly we weren't able to, but we ended up driving a steamroller around for a bit before leaving. Cops showed up as we were 2 blocks away from the site and they did nothing thankfully :mrgreen:

Why do you keep calling South Korea Commie Korea? They've had a fully functioning democracy for 30 years now

France vs Mexico oooooooohhhhh Please Mexico, beat the living [cabbage] out of France :mrgreen: As much as France is a good team, I can't forgive them for kicking out Ireland of the finals after scoring a goal with a handball :angry:

It rained today and since I work outdoors, I got paid 80$ for sitting on my ass and reading a book for 6 hours :thumbup: . It's funny how productive I am ever since I'm working this slacked job.. i've already read as much as I did last summer, where I only worked part time and forced myself to read as much as I could. Also, I've noticed I haven't told any exciting stories about myself lately. That's because normally when I go out I get hammered and hunt for women, but recently I've been testing my alcohol limits again in order to calibrate my drinking for this summer. Sadly instead of starting by drinking a little and progressing until I feel like I should stop, I instead almost kill myself by drinking like a fish, then gradually decrease the number of beers each night after that. I have lots of beer money stashed away, so it's okay :mrgreen:

Brazil vs North Korea... if you wanted goals, now is the time to tune in :shock:

almost scored within the first 30 seconds of changing in :ohnoes:

The horns aren't that bad. I just pretend the stands are filled with bumble bees, ready to sting the losers to death :ohnoes:

So why'd you leave ?

I actually did this IRL with an ex girlfriend and it didn't come close to this. The main problem when you do it in your home is that the rain overpowers the sound of the fire. You always end up listening to the rain anyways, the music is only audible when there's a short pause in the rain, and the warm fire and snuggling is what really makes the combo. But yea, your girlfriend would have to be very easily impressed for her to have a good reaction off this.

I had a great day but all night I've been raging at the xbox live internet site. I vividly remembered being able to cancel my subscription renewal last time I had done it, but for some reason I couldn't find it this time even though I *knew* it was next to impossible to find. It turns out the removed the hidden page that makes you able to cancel, so now I have to call. I felt like a lab rat, going through a constant loop of unhelpful pages for hours. Then I proceeded to register my red ring of death xbox for repair. Spent a bit of time finding the page then writing all my contact info to get a loading screen which will be done loading some time in 2020. So now I have to call for that, too. Even though they advertise the ability to do both (cancel subscription and register online) from the internet, they still force you to call. I feel sorry for the person that's going to have to deal with a raging nerd tomorrow morning (because it's not a 24-hour service obviously, that would make it too convenient).

Is it just me or were all the matches extremely boring? (Don't count any matches within the past 12 hours, I have been sleeping). Man, watching soccer/footbalal really makes me miss hockey :cry: Anywaysw, I know this comment is super late, but Ireland should have qualified instead of France if the game wasn't rigged. So I've basically lost all interest in the game ever since the ref didn't call that handball in the penalty area.

Strangle and yell menacing things to your toilet until it accepts your report card JACK BAUER STYLE

Think of it as a house mortgage. Each month you pay off a little for the phone (by keeping your postpaid plan with them, and sometimes some extra money on top of that.) At the end you own it. Ah, makes sense :thumbup: And Laura, why white? I find the black much more slick and nice on the eyes.

Well, they have to be hot for it to work... It's great when they're both really good at making out. It's fantastic when there's cleavage flying all over the room :cool:

You can't stand up the old iPhones on a desk when you're doing Facetime with someone else, showing off your new skirt to your girlfriend :rolleyes: But I actually prefer the new design much more, just because it allows glass on both sides of the phone. I have a Q: when you're on a cellphone contract for let's say 2 years, do you keep the phone after it's done? The only phone I've ever had was pre-bought and I just prepaid all my calltime (with an added 5$/month for unlim text) so I have no idea how contracts work.

....must......not.......kill...... But yeah, Flyers just got outplayed. Not much else to it. :-( pcht, Philly got a free ride to the Eastern playoff finals. The habs qualified last minute, making philly go up against the devils instead of washington, then after beating the caps the habs played the pengs, making philly go up against boston instead of the pengs. However, the habs lost to philly after beating the best teams in the east 4-3 :cry: n00bs

Nice post. I'll be really sad if the iphone doesn't record full 720p video quality :cry:

Wait until you see the resulting video. The sensor is so small, it's basically going to be noise; they're just squeezing more pixels out of it.. Also, "HD" is stretching it, I think that 720p hardly counts as HD, seeing as even the biggest HD format is pretty lame. errrr, unless you're an expert on video recording (which, after calling a lens a sensor, I assume you aren't) then I don't see how you could possibly assume all these things.

Lately I've either been wearing my work uniform (col bleue) or my lab coat (col blanc) so my fashion sense has dropped to critical levels. Sometimes I roam the streets aimlessly in tan pants and a sweater vest... if I'm lucky the fashion police doesn't pull me over and make me face another night in the fashion holding cell, where they force me to watch Gene Simmons in his flamboyant tank tops and short shorts. Okay I'm done :smile:

Outside of fashion shows and gay clubs, no. What's wrong with jeans though? Derrrrrr I wear shorts and long sleeved shirts. Like the one Dexter wears when he murders people. I'm afraid of nothing. *flicks back imaginary fringe, snaps his fingers three times, does a move with his hair spray* and so on and so forth.

Blackberrys, oh lord. I can tell when a friend is sending a text from a blackberry because it's filled with typos. The keyboard is so small that my mind crapped out on me when I tried sending a joke text using my friend's blackberry: "how do I type? dude, using the keyboard yeah but what do I press it with.. is there a stylus that comes with this? no man, just use your fingers really? how?" The story was funnier when it happened, whatever.

I just broke down into tears reading this. *Guides noble_aloof to the "Intelligence Blunders" thread and locks the door*

He's right. People think i'm more 'tone' than 'beef', yet all I do is heavy lifting exercises. If you're already inevitably skinny because of a high teenager metabolism, doing weights is the only way you're going to look close to healthy.

This is cool, but I don't see how they can call this teleportation. Quantum entanglement is a better word for it.

I get paid 15$+ an hour for reading and napping (is this Super Mario? because you just got 1UP'ed)