"I want a girlfriend/boyfriend", and other such relationship advice

[Noxx]

Sadly if i could do that, i would. But i'm 100% certain that even if i could that would 100% cause my parents to cut me off no matter what. Also, in the country i live in, it's not legal for me to live with them.

[Noxx]

In Qatar. And no i go to school in the US.

[muggiwhplar]

another girl on POF asked if I had any more pics so I sent her one. she asked if I could send her one that was "closer up" (even though the pic I sent her easily shows what I look like).

 

So I sent her a "closer up" pic :lol:

 

 

Wonder how many dates I miss out on as a result of choosing to make myself laugh instead of nailing down a meet...

[Noxx]

I'm getting the vibe that you shouldn't date anyone in Qatar. I think if you do date it should be someone in the US to your preferences and that that relationship should be kept away from your parents until your out of school. Regardless about how you feel about this girl that your currently with, the logistical situation makes this a nightmare.

 

LDR most of the time + unsupportive parents when you are in country = frustration for years.

 

 

A lot of your frustrations are coming from looking for a permanent relationship in too early a stage in your life. At this point in your life with the cards your delt your going to have to get school/career sorted first. I think if you dated girls in America at the school you go to as short term things and kept them out of your parents nose that you would be fine. I think you shouldn't even begin to look for a long term relationship until you figure out which country you want to live in long term after school.

 

Again unless you can get a job in America/student loans I think you may be out of luck for a while and this is the best alternative. Idk if you can get them, a work visa has its limits depending on which country your from, and student loans are for citizens only I believe.

 

Okay so the only problem with this is:

 

1.) My course is going to be anywhere from 2 months to 8 months and i'll be done. So that leaves very little time to actually "date" anyone. Another thing is that i'll be busy pretty much 9 - 5 over week days. Weekends are too hard to predict.

2.) My best bet at getting a good job is in Qatar. Chances of finding a job in the US, as a non-citizen, as a pilot, are very slim. If i do, it's going to be like a $36k job. If i work in Qatar i will start at like $60k tax free. As much as i hate to chase money, i would much rather work in Qatar than in the US.

3.) Since i go to an Aviation school, it's kinda logic that 95% of the people there are guys. 4% are ugly girls (or girls i have no attraction to at least), and 1% is fairly attractive, which means 93% of the guys in that school will be swarming her like flies swarm fresh shit.

4.) The town i study in is small. Everyone there knows that if you have a foreign accent, you're studying aviation. Girls there know that especially. Girls also know that it means you're only going to be there for a short period. So they won't even consider to date you, really. I've spent about 18 months there already and in that entire time i met like 8 or 9 girls in total (by meet i mean went on at least 1 date).

The girls who actually date "pilots" there, are usually gold diggers as well, which makes it rally unattractive.

 

So dating in the US isn't a great option either. I agree that dating in Qatar can be a very unattractive option. But truth be told, i know that once i start working here, and i move out, my life will become so much easier because i'll once again have the freedom i have become used to having the past 18 months. If i'm out of the house, regardless of how far i live from my parents, they really have no say over what i do/who i date. Once i'm out of the house it's their play. If they choose to not have a relationship with me then, well it's on their heads. Ultimately i want to keep contact with my parents. They are my parents. I do love them. But, that being said, if they choose to not accept my choices (especially over something so trivial as a skin colour), then i really could not be bothered to see them. I have always "hated" racists. I will not treat them any different just because they are my parents. I have a great relationship with them for the most part, and it's something i don't really want to give up. But if it comes down to that, then i will.

 

Also i forgot to mention this but whether i date in the US or in Qatar, my situation will not change much. While i was there, the only thing close to a decent relationship i had was with a mexican girl. Again, she's not white, so my parents would not have liked that. If things ended up getting serious and i got married to her, etc. I would have been exactly where i am now. Only difference would have been that by that time i would have been living in my own house and i would have had a job. So they would not have any financial hold over me, but they would still give me the "her or us" ultimatum.

[Kaida23]

Just went on my first date since my ex broke up with me last fall. I'd almost forgotten how nice an evening with another adult was. :grin:

[constrictor]

If you dated the mexican girl while in the US how would your parents even know? Plus its my own opinion that you shouldn't be looking for marriage so soon, at the very least be done with school completely. Regardless about how you felt with mexican girl :lol:.

 

But yes I am telling you to look for more girls like her in America and to end the relationship when you head back home, or put it on hold as long as your both okay with that. Being a foreigner that is going to leave soon doesn't stop relationships from happening. It stops serious -I'm-going-to-marry-this-person relationships. Which is good, you are in no position to have one of those right now, especially since your preference in girls pisses off your parents and your financially dependent on them. When your out of your parents house for good find someone you like in whatever country you end up in.

 

 

On a side note I just noticed that I've never dated a white girl either. Closest was a jewish/persian girl lol

 

 

Someone has got a typeeee..

[RpgGamer]

Noxx I think the thread has concluded that you're pretty screwed in your current situation and there's very little you can do about it. My next quality of your issue I'd like to prod being how vigilantly your parents would stick to cutting you off. Could they really live with themselves knowing they screwed over their son's future? (And aren't you their oldest child, that could win some points)

[Noxx]

I'm almost certain they would never cut me off. My sister has screwed up worse than me and they never cut her off. Butttt, im a guy, so they might not just threaten. There's always the smallest of chances my dad might decide enough is enough. I don't know.

[Boris5000]

 

Wonder how many dates I miss out on as a result of choosing to make myself laugh instead of nailing down a meet...

 

If they don't have a sense of humour they aren't worth dating IMHO.

[muggiwhplar]

Well I don't really blame them since it's hard to convey my dry sarcasm to someone who's never met me via text.

 

Regardless, if they don't have a sense of humor they can still be a good FB :D

[Maze]

Is it acceptable to ask a girl out a week after she broke up with a guy she dated for like four months?

[iBe]

Is it acceptable to ask a girl out a week after she broke up with a guy she dated for like four months?

I think this is really situational.

Were you linked to the guy at all? Close friend, someone you went to school with, or just some guy who you only know of because he dated the girl you like?

I would make it clear that you are interested and probably end up asking her out. Anything to keep her mind off the old guy would be in your favor (except for another guy). You would be the fun new guy, and would have the advantage.

[RpgGamer]

Depends on the girl, you, the ex, and the dynamic of relationships between all permutations of the three parties

[nine naked men]

also the phase of the moon on the day you plan to ask the question and the position of the three planets whose greek (greek NOT roman DON'T [bleep] THIS UP) god equivalent's personalities best fit you, the lady and her ex.

 

if all this checks out according to the whispering tome that nobody in yr town's library will talk about, feel free to buy a bottle of ram's blood, dip yr junk in it, and shoot for the stars.

[Maze]

I talked to her ex once at a Prom dance, but that's it really.

 

I just don't know how to do it. I don't know if she's ready to be in another relationship or not. I heard her say that she wants to meet some guys but I think that was a joke.

 

If I call her and ask her to coffee or something, she'll know what's up (that it's a date). But I can't really ask her to anything else casually because I rarely see her in person.

[Ginger_Warrior]

She dated him for four months.

 

You know, I'm really going out on a limb here but... I reckon this lad probably wasn't the love of her life and you shouldn't worry about it.

[muggiwhplar]

also the phase of the moon on the day you plan to ask the question and the position of the three planets whose greek (greek NOT roman DON'T [bleep] THIS UP) god equivalent's personalities best fit you, the lady and her ex.

 

if all this checks out according to the whispering tome that nobody in yr town's library will talk about, feel free to buy a bottle of ram's blood, dip yr junk in it, and shoot for the stars.

 

heroin is a hell of a drug

[Maze]

What I would do if I was you is tell her how you feel and see if shes on the same page and do whatever comes natural from there.

 

In other words say, "hey I know you just got out of a relationship but I've always thought you were really cute and I kinda like you a lot" (or some variant of that). Then see how she responds, and go from there. Ask this question again if your unsure if her response was positive or negative after you tell her how you feel :lol:

 

Same advice I give everyone who has a crush and doesn't know what to do.

 

Wouldn't it be weird to call her out of the blue one day and be like, "Hey, what's up? I kinda like you a lot"?

[Maze]

Nah do it in person when you guys are alone. I supose if you schedule a date the cats already out of the bag though

The thing is that I don't see her in person anymore. As soon as I asked her to hang out, she would know what's up.

 

 

Should I call and ask her on a date to coffee then? Is that the final decision?

[muggiwhplar]

ask her if she's interested in meeting up sometime. if yes, go get coffee or a beer with her (idk how old you are) and take it from there

[Sir_Squab]

Nah do it in person when you guys are alone. I supose if you schedule a date the cats already out of the bag though

The thing is that I don't see her in person anymore. As soon as I asked her to hang out, she would know what's up.

 

 

Should I call and ask her on a date to coffee then? Is that the final decision?

 

This is dating, not kidnapping. You don't need to keep it a secret ahead of time.

 

And if she automatically knows that you asking to hang out means you like her, well... she probably already knows you like her?

 

Also, if you never see her in person, you're not risking much if things don't work out.

[RpgGamer]

Nah do it in person when you guys are alone. I supose if you schedule a date the cats already out of the bag though

The thing is that I don't see her in person anymore. As soon as I asked her to hang out, she would know what's up.

 

 

Should I call and ask her on a date to coffee then? Is that the final decision?

 

This is dating, not kidnapping. You don't need to keep it a secret ahead of time.

 

And if she automatically knows that you asking to hang out means you like her, well... she probably already knows you like her?

 

Also, if you never see her in person, you're not risking much if things don't work out.

 

This. Stop [kitty] footing and ask her. Why make it a confuddled ambiuous casual nothing when you want a date? Why mask that its a date if you want a date? Worst case scenario she says no and you get on with your life. Of course shell know what's up. You think you're the only poor sap that knows she's single? Ill bet you have at least 3 othwr dudes already talking to her. Get your act together and talk to her.

[muggiwhplar]

Nah do it in person when you guys are alone. I supose if you schedule a date the cats already out of the bag though

The thing is that I don't see her in person anymore. As soon as I asked her to hang out, she would know what's up.

 

 

Should I call and ask her on a date to coffee then? Is that the final decision?

 

This is dating, not kidnapping. You don't need to keep it a secret ahead of time.

 

And if she automatically knows that you asking to hang out means you like her, well... she probably already knows you like her?

 

Also, if you never see her in person, you're not risking much if things don't work out.

 

This. Stop [kitty] footing and ask her. Why make it a confuddled ambiuous casual nothing when you want a date? Why mask that its a date if you want a date? Worst case scenario she says no and you get on with your life. Of course shell know what's up. You think you're the only poor sap that knows she's single? Ill bet you have at least 3 othwr dudes already talking to her. Get your act together and talk to her.

 

This.

 

[spoiler=language]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nZRrzGwjOXA

 

 

[muggiwhplar]

girl on my Facebook newsfeed uploaded a pic of her new haircut (short hair). sigh, another otherwise-hot friend of mine cuts her hair short as she succumbs to the post-grad boring suburban lifestyle. 66 people "like" her short hair. All of them are women, of course. :P

[constrictor]

girl on my Facebook newsfeed uploaded a pic of her new haircut (short hair). sigh, another otherwise-hot friend of mine cuts her hair short as she succumbs to the post-grad boring suburban lifestyle. 66 people "like" her short hair. All of them are women, of course. :P

 

Short hair is literally like 89% always a bad choice.