tommyhales Posted August 27, 2006 Share Posted August 27, 2006 a man walks in to a bar and says to the barman man-hi, if i can show you a relly good trick can i have a free beer please barman-um... ok the man pulls out of his right pocket a tiny peano and in the outher pocket he pulled out a small mouse. the mouse starts playing the peanio. barman-wow that was relly good hears your beer. now the man drinks his beer and says. man-if i can show you a beter trick can i have free beers for the rest of the night barman-ok(thinking there couldent be any trick beter than that) so the man does the same thing with the mouseand the peanio but this time he pulls out a small frog who starts singing then he puts them back and a man comes over hear saying he will buy that frog for 250k the guy declines saying its not for sale so he drinks a beer the guy comes back he said 350k the guy declines saying not for sale and drinks anouther beer then he comes back and says final offer 500k the guy says that is a good offer and says yes. barman-you idiot that frog could be worth millions man-not relly the mouse was a VANTRILLIQWIST a brain and a pear of jump cables walk in to a bar the brain gos to the barman can i have 2 beers please the barman says no the brain ask's why the barman says your out of your head and that outher guy is going to start something... what do you call a woman with one leg bigge than the outher ILEAN what did the big candle say to the small candle your to yung to smoke what did the traffic light say to the outher trafic light DONT LOOK NOW IM ABOUT TO CHANGE what do you call a guy who wears a red cape blue spamdex and has a big s on his shirt A HOMOSEXUWAL what do you get whan you cross a kangeroo with a sheep A WOLLY JUMPER how do you cut the see in half WITH A SEE SAW if a plane crashed on the border line of mexico were would you berry the suvivers YOU WOULD BERRY THE SUVIVORES what do you get when you put a hacker on the moon a problem wht do you get when you put 2 hackers on the moon still a problem what do you get when you put all the hackers on the moon problem solved http://members.spboards.com/index.php?s ... nescape123 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Rob2006 Posted September 2, 2006 Share Posted September 2, 2006 Why did the first monkey fall out off the tree because it was dead.. Why did the the 2nd monkey fall out of the tree because it was holding on2 the 1st monkey... Why did the 3rd monkey fall out of the tree Because he thought it was a game... *~_RIP The Old Nite_~* Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ragen Posted September 2, 2006 Share Posted September 2, 2006 ^ Contined on from that. Why did the tiger die? 3 monkeys just fell on its head. Thanks Venomai for this super sig and Kwimbob for the awesome avatar! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SideRow Posted September 9, 2006 Share Posted September 9, 2006 How many blondes does it take to change a lightbulb? 101: 1 to hold the lightbulb, 100 others to turn the house around! =D> RAWR PLAWKS?SELLING BLUE ELE- SKIRT - PM - ME -IN- GAME Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
arg4 Posted September 13, 2006 Share Posted September 13, 2006 a man walked into a bar, the bartender said ill give you 10 beers if you can make this donkey laugh. So the man went up and whispered in the donkeys ear. 1 week later the man reentered the bar, and the bartender says ill give u 10 more beers if u make this donkey stop laughing. So the man took the donkey out back, when they reenter the donkey is no longer laughing. The bartender asked him, how did u make him laugh then stop laughing. The man replied i told him i had a bigger penis than he did. then to make him stop laughing i took him out back and showed him it Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
SideRow Posted September 16, 2006 Share Posted September 16, 2006 What do you get if you cross an elephant with a rhino? 'Ell-iph-I-no" Thats a good one. RAWR PLAWKS?SELLING BLUE ELE- SKIRT - PM - ME -IN- GAME Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
jemathonical Posted September 22, 2006 Share Posted September 22, 2006 I saw a shirt the other day saying, 'Im not gay but my boyfriend is'. I didn't think it was funny so i told my Girlfriend to take it off. Whats black and white and looks like like a horse? A Zebra Why couldn't the dog fit through the dog flap door thing? IT WAS DRIVING A TRACTOR!!!!! A snail goes up to the barman and asks for a beer and gets flicked off..... ONE YEAR LATER Snail "what was that for?" ^Sir Jem 05-The Bunny Drinking Blog?^ Click it! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
TimeStopper Posted October 1, 2006 Share Posted October 1, 2006 How many noobs does it take a screw a lightbulb? 227,448. 18 to get scammed by it 127 to beg money from it. 246 to recommend replace it. 9,732 to support the idea. 98,737 to be against the idea. 128,320 to complain that it's even worse than before. Like forum text games much?um... from... MARS, yes, in the third county from the... left. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
da_guru_123 Posted October 13, 2006 Share Posted October 13, 2006 there was to cows sitting in a tree steaking waffles, then another horse came and he hadnt seen a airplane to. What the? I don't get it... Moving to new account, subtle_rune. Please PM me there. Now you know that you can trust him! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
da_guru_123 Posted October 13, 2006 Share Posted October 13, 2006 How do you confuse a blonde? put it in a circle and tell it to stand in a corner How does a blonde confuse you? She walks out and says she's done it Moving to new account, subtle_rune. Please PM me there. Now you know that you can trust him! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
da_guru_123 Posted October 14, 2006 Share Posted October 14, 2006 Knock knock Who's there?? Interrupting cow Interrupting co- MOOOOOOO!!!!!!! Yeh, long live the jokes on vicar of dibley! \ Moving to new account, subtle_rune. Please PM me there. Now you know that you can trust him! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
poopsydoopsy Posted October 14, 2006 Share Posted October 14, 2006 How many blondes does it take to change a lightbulb? 101: 1 to hold the lightbulb, 100 others to turn the house around! =D> HAHAHA. Morons are funny. =D> 26,974th person to get 85 mining on September 20th, 2008Try Ferion, it only takes a few minutes per day; you can play it while mining. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ult_Mac_Dady Posted October 15, 2006 Share Posted October 15, 2006 ... -Why is the tower of Pisa inclined?" Because it has better reflexes than the twin towers.... XD that was funny! ... HQ: Well, you know what you doing 'Zig' Police: What ! HQ: Take off every 'Zig' Police: Captain ! HQ: For great justice! Police:This isent a joke!this is a really important man, not a zero wing scene. ... HQ: WHAT YOU SAY! ! Police: ALL YOUR BASE ARE BELONG TO US! ... In a.d. 2101 war was beginning! Ok this was real... I went up to my frend and said Me (m):In ad 2101 what was beginning? frend (f):well at the rate the us is going id say war. M: What happen? F: (realizing my zero wing referince) Someone set us up the bomb. M: How are you gentilmen? F: (now shouting in the middle of class) ALL YOUR BASE ARE BELONG TO US! Teacher: What did (did was not autible) you say? By this time we were on the floor laughing. M: MOVE 'ZIG' F: LET ROLL! Teacher: This is the stupidest detention ive had to right out. The detention was worth it! ALL YOUR BASE ARE BELONG TO... THE STATE! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
harvestboy Posted October 16, 2006 Share Posted October 16, 2006 Q: What does a white chicken say when he bumps into a wall? A: Bok Q: What does a black chicken say when he bumps into a wall? A: Yo bok man! http://magicrpg.free.fr/pages/golden_sun/golden2/intro/01.jpg[\img] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blaze The Movie Fan Posted October 17, 2006 Share Posted October 17, 2006 I know: RandomGuy1: "Hey, I can burn magic logs with fire." RandomGuy2: "Ok, what's your firemaking level then"? Funny? :anxious: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
poopsydoopsy Posted October 17, 2006 Share Posted October 17, 2006 Subject: HAHA First of all you can't actually eat wine. Second, they aren't rare at all. they are normal priced like wine. IF you are THAT stupid, check the offical RuneScape forums... they are priced within 15-40Gp. Lol, Good luck scamming Speak to the hand If you respond with violence action will be taken. =P Funny eh? 26,974th person to get 85 mining on September 20th, 2008Try Ferion, it only takes a few minutes per day; you can play it while mining. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kaphias Posted October 23, 2006 Share Posted October 23, 2006 3 people are standing on the edge of a cliff, waiting for their death. There is a blonde, a brunette, and a red haired person. The killers decide to kill the red haired person first. They say "ready, set,..." the red head points away and yells "tornado!" and sneaks away. The next up is the brunette. They say "ready, set,..." the brunette points away and screams "lightning!" and sneaks away. The last one left is the blonde. They say "ready, set,..." the blonde points away and yells "fire!" 8,325th to 99 Firemaking 3/9/08 | 44,811th to 99 Cooking 7/16/084,968th to 99 Farming 10/9/09 | Runescaper August 2005-March 2010Tip.it Mod Feb. 2008-Sep. 2008 | Tip.it Crew Sep. 2008-Nov. 2009 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ragen Posted October 23, 2006 Share Posted October 23, 2006 What do you get if you cross a sheep and a kangaroo? A wooly jumper! What do you get if you leave and elephant in the fridge? Footprints in the butter. Why did the lobster blush? The sea weed. Once upon a time there was a constipated mathamatician. He worked it out with a pencil. Thanks Venomai for this super sig and Kwimbob for the awesome avatar! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
supercanon14 Posted October 27, 2006 Share Posted October 27, 2006 ok i got one me:have you heard the one about the banana and orange? person:no me:eathier have I this one is from my bro why did the boy put peneut butter on the road? to make more traffic jam DoD:S ownagewhat we have here is a ..um.. failur to communcate check out my steam ID page @ alpha company Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest AshKaYu Posted October 28, 2006 Share Posted October 28, 2006 A kid was sitting on his lawn with a box of puppies one morning. George Bush was on his morning run, accompanied by some Secret Service workers. Dubya asked the boy what kind of puppies were in the box. The little boy said, "Republicans." The President beamed, patted the boy on the head, and said, "Atta boy!" A few weeks later Bush was jogging again, this time with * Cheney in tow. Bush stopped at the boy's house, winked at * and said, "Hey kid, what kind of pupies are in the box?" The boy said, "Democracts" Bush looked crushed, saying, "What happened? A few weeks ago they were Republicans!" The boy said, "Well, the puppies opened their eyes." Dunno if political humour is appreciated by the kids here, at least I like it :) mid if I edit it to be less biased and more realistic. a pope is on his morning jog and sees a kid with a box of puppies. He asks: "what kind of puppies are they?" "" "thata boy" the pope says two weeks later the pope comes by again and asks: "how are the puppies doing?" "they turned athiest" says the kid. "what happened? werent they ?" the kid says "well theyve opened their eyes." :roll: . Don't make this an anti-religion thread. How many -insert group of things that have blood- does it take to paint a wall? Depends how hard you throw them. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Numer0_un0 Posted October 30, 2006 Share Posted October 30, 2006 How Many Noobs Does It Take To Kill A Level 126?????????? Answer: err, system error, delete question, and try again... :-s What Color Is A Burp????? Burple... :P LOVEDTHE 101 ANNOYING JOKES!!! :D :D :D :D :thumbsup: :thumbsup: :thumbsup: :thumbsup: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nicrune007 Posted November 6, 2006 Share Posted November 6, 2006 i think i heard this one from TV :" you're so dumb , i ask you to buy a colour TV ,you say what colour? " Hey Nicrune007 , Whats Your Username? 99 Ranged on 2/6/07 99 Hit Points on 9/5/08 99 Defense on 26/4/08 99 Attack on 14/2/09 99 Strength on 25/2/09 99 Slayer on 13/9/09\:D/ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nicrune007 Posted November 12, 2006 Share Posted November 12, 2006 oo i got 1 more: one day a man goes to a mental hospital... walking around wondering wads the time... he saw a patient and ask him wads the time... the patient took out a protractor and use a pencil to draw a 90 degree line. then he do some calculation by measuring the sun shadow.. finally the patient said.. " from wat i see.. it is 3 pm now " the man was very impressed but he asked.. " wad if it is night time? " the patient said /... " oh i think i would use my watch then" Hey Nicrune007 , Whats Your Username? 99 Ranged on 2/6/07 99 Hit Points on 9/5/08 99 Defense on 26/4/08 99 Attack on 14/2/09 99 Strength on 25/2/09 99 Slayer on 13/9/09\:D/ Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Abyssalwhip Posted November 29, 2006 Share Posted November 29, 2006 i dont know if this is too innapropriate but... what does Micheal Jackson and a PSP have in common children turn them on there made of plastic what kind of bread does animal activists like? PETA bread what does a cow have on her ipod MOOsic (yeah thats bad) Your name is "bet you fail", and you're starting a business with your mom? I'm not even going to touch that..... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Echofish Posted December 1, 2006 Share Posted December 1, 2006 Dunno if it's already posted here, but this is one of them 'blonde jokes' The M&M's factory needed someone to check all their M&Ms for any imperfections. They hired a young, blonde woman to do the job. "All you have to do is sort out the good ones from the bad ones." The next week, the packaging staff were complaining that they we're running low of M&Ms. They asked the blonde woman what's happening. "What's happening to all the chocolate?" the manager asked, "Well, I had to throw them away because it says W instead of M!" Get it? W?M? This one made me laugh =D> A guy walks into a pub. He sits down and buys himself a beer. He suddenly saw the peanuts that were in a bowl infront of hm complimenting him! "Nice hair mate!" and "Woah, I like your new phone!" He walks away shaken and he slowly approached the jukebox. He put a coin in and then suddenly: "Oi you! Get out of my pub you git! I don't wanna see you here ever!" Totally bemused, he asks the barman and says "What's goin on? I just got here and your jukebox is already startin'. The barman looked at him apologetically, "Didn't you read the signs? It says the peanuts are complimentary and the jukebox is out of order!" Never copied and pasted that! \ Ultra Unholy,Hearted Machine... Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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