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Noobs say the funniest things!


xXAbyssalXx

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a nice short and simple one

 

 

 

me (lvl 70) - at ardy stealing silk

 

noob (lvl88) - can i have your silk?

 

me - for.......

 

noob - free?

 

me - ummmmmm no

 

noob - nub ill steal my own

 

*noob steals own*

 

*noob tried to sell to silk guy*

 

*noob gets battered by guard*

 

me (and the rest of the players around) - hehehehe

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ok this just shows how bad scammers are now

 

 

 

noob: buying 10 laws 10k!

 

me: *trades and puts up 10 laws*

 

noob: puts up 10k

 

me: *accepts*

 

noob: hold on don't accept so fast

 

me: why?

 

noob: i didn't get to change the money to 1k and put up an iron scimmy yet

 

me: omg scammer

 

noob: so

 

 

 

:wall:

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Here's one from a while ago. I was cutting yews at seers with some people, all fairly rich ranging from 80-113.

 

 

 

Newb: hey nice hat. what is it?

 

113: a party hat.

 

Newb: can I have it?

 

guy: lol!

 

me: lol...

 

113: well no not really.

 

Newb: howd you get it?

 

113: you cant get them any more unless you buy them.

 

guy: this guys in full iron, he cant afford one.

 

newb: liar!!! nooobs! I bet you can still get one and you lyin cuz you think

 

newb: that you are so great!!

 

113: actually...your right. you can still get them.

 

Newb: how???

 

113: just head into the wilderness to the castle with the knights.

 

Newb: ok!!! I scammed u! Im gonna get one and rub it in your face!

 

 

 

About 30 minutes later.

 

 

 

Me: hey what do you think happened to the guy you sent to the wildy?

 

113: gawd, I feel really guilty now.

I hoped you enjoyed my post. If not, you may wish to jot down the name below and make obscene phone calls.

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Coming to a big screen near you.

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I was in Varrock square today trying to get a mind talisman, stupid of me because I could have just killed some wizards till I got one. Anyway, a guy notices my crown and I get the usual onslaught of questions. I give up trying to buy a talisman in the square so I head off to the Wizards' Tower. And the guy, of course follows me.

 

 

 

Him: Did you get jagex to hack your account and make it lvl 78?

 

Me: No...

 

Him: Can you get me a lvl 70 account plz?

 

Me: No...

 

Him: Why?

 

Me: Because it's illegal to do that

 

Him: How old are you?

 

Me: Why do you want to know that

 

Him: Cuz I like moderators

 

(eww...)

 

Me: How long are you going to be following me?

 

Him: I dunno, long time probly.

 

Me: lkjfhkljdfhlkdsfjhglkdjflkdjs (from bashing my head onto my keyboard)

the russians are the best! Hands down!
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I was in Varrock square today trying to get a mind talisman, stupid of me because I could have just killed some wizards till I got one. Anyway, a guy notices my crown and I get the usual onslaught of questions. I give up trying to buy a talisman in the square so I head off to the Wizards' Tower. And the guy, of course follows me.

 

 

 

Him: Did you get jagex to hack your account and make it lvl 78?

 

Me: No...

 

Him: Can you get me a lvl 70 account plz?

 

Me: No...

 

Him: Why?

 

Me: Because it's illegal to do that

 

Him: How old are you?

 

Me: Why do you want to know that

 

Him: Cuz I like moderators

 

(eww...)

 

Me: How long are you going to be following me?

 

Him: I dunno, long time probly.

 

Me: lkjfhkljdfhlkdsfjhglkdjflkdjs (from bashing my head onto my keyboard)

 

 

 

Ouch.

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^ Blog.

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Hmmm, here's one that happened not to long ago. I guess that'll teach me to be nice. -.- Not really funny, but meh.

 

 

 

I just started a new account and made myself full iron so I wouldn't have to pay. As I was killing goblins, a guy walks up to me.

 

 

 

Him: Can I have ur plate?

 

Him: Haha jk

 

Me: You really want an iron plate? I'll just make one for you.

 

Him: Relly?

 

Me: Yeah, just hang out here and I'll brb with it.

 

 

 

So I log onto my main and make him an iron plate and a iron full helm to be nice. I walk over to where he was waiting and give it to him. I then log back onto my new character. I notice he put his bronze plate back on.

 

 

 

Him: Wheres the plate?

 

Him: R u trying to trick a noob??

 

Me: ...I just gave it to you

 

Him: No u didn't

 

Me: ...right

 

 

 

Thankfully he runs off, but geez. To heck with being nice? <.<

It can't rain all the time

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Just cause I have full rune and I'm level 56, people ask for "Phr33 st00f pl0z 0r I will h4xz0r u 2 bits!!!!!!11111" :notalk:
rofl gee wiz how bad was it for me!!! lvl 39 with full rune on!!! keh-bah-gee!!!!!!
OMG OMG SAILING IS COMING LOLOLOLOL!!!1111 b/c JAGEX GAMES STUDIO , ANAGRAM OF SAITO JUDGE X-GAMES

 

TAKASHI SAITO= RED SOX P1TCHER... RED SOX = BOSTON, BOSTON = PORT CITY!!!! PORT CITY = SAILING

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Rs should display people's IQ's to help you make friends...
siggie fied
OMG OMG SAILING IS COMING LOLOLOLOL!!!1111 b/c JAGEX GAMES STUDIO , ANAGRAM OF SAITO JUDGE X-GAMES

 

TAKASHI SAITO= RED SOX P1TCHER... RED SOX = BOSTON, BOSTON = PORT CITY!!!! PORT CITY = SAILING

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So I was walking through barbarian village, when a noob comes up to me and asks for free stuff. I can't shake him off, so I end up walking though one of the huts in the village in such a way that I'm outside and he's inside. I close the door and run.

 

 

 

It's not particularly funny, but it's a sensible evaison technique.

There's no sig here. Move it along...

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I remember a funny one:

 

 

 

One day i was weilding a rune 2h and walking through verrock until this lvl 15 noob walks by:

 

 

 

Noob: Hey can I buy ur sword for 5k! Im desperate!

 

Me: NO WAY IT'S A RUNE 2H ITS WORK 45K AT LEAST!

 

Noob: 6k?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

lol...

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bannerbancocopiadj3.jpg

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went fo a f2p world to talk to one of my friends while i still had my torags. heh... a nnob comes up...

 

 

 

noob-wat armour is that?

 

me-it is whale skin armour.

 

noob-is it n e good?

 

me-ye it owns

 

noob-how do u get it?

 

my friend- you have to kill a dire beached whale

 

noob-where r those?

 

me-you know where edgeville is?

 

noob-yea

 

me-well, its nowhere near there

 

noob-omg! i bet u r lying

 

me-and you just now caught on?

the other day i was walking with some friends when i saw a dead bird. i said, 'look, a dead bird!' my friends looked in the sky and said 'where?'

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While I was mining iron:

 

Noob*: noob!

 

Noob: Everyone here is a noob!

 

Me: Stop talking.

 

Noob: I own all of you on my main.

 

Other Person: level?

 

Noob: lvl 88

 

...and then...

 

Noob: My cousin is Zezima!

 

 

 

*Note: Spelling may not be as accurate as I post it here.

Like forum text games much?

um... from... MARS, yes, in the third county from the... left.

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lmao this 1 juss happened 1 second ago

 

scene:ranging arrows in experiment cave

 

*picks up arorws*

 

noob:hey give those back

 

me:...?

 

noob:u stole my mith arrows

 

me:umm...no i didnt

 

noob:yes u did reported for item scamming...arrow stealer

 

me:mk

 

noob:give me mine back and ill give u ur 20 irons back

 

me:umm i didnt take ur arrows noob

 

noob:give me my arrows back now

 

*fight goes on 4 ever* :thumbsup:

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seems like all noobs are like 8 years old... ask incredibly dumb questions.. and have the worst of grammar...

 

 

 

one noob one day...

 

went something like this:

 

noob:cussing

 

me:reported

 

noob:you cant report me im not a member

 

me: it dosent matter if your a member i can still report you

 

noob:no you cant

 

and went on a bit more..

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hey guys,my first post on the runetips forum!

 

 

 

i'm a combat lvl 52 f2per with full black (i know,not the armour you'd expect someone over combat lvl 50 to wear)and i'm in a large mansion in falador populated only by a woman.then i got bored and decided to start

 

attacking the woman.that's when a player logs in,he's lvl 32 but pretty much still a noob judging from his behaviour in our "conversation"

 

 

 

me:*attacks woman*

 

noob:no!anna!!!!!my assistant!

 

me:well she's dead now

 

noob:there's a man next door,why don't you kill him?!

 

me:because i'm killing "anna"

 

woman spawns again

 

me:*attacks*

 

noob:nooooooo!!!!you monster!!you killed anna!!

 

this is when i start to play a bit of "theater"

 

me:you don't need anna,join me and you could be so much stronger

 

noob:no!i will not join you!

 

woman spawns again,i just attack her again and she drops chaos runes

 

me:she has chaos runes with her,do you still think she's your lovely asistent?

 

noob:the runes were for research!

 

me:you don't get it do you?she wanted you dead!

 

me:but we wouldn't want to waste you,as you might be a valuable servant

 

noob:i will not give in to you!you monster!i'm going to get the town!

 

the noob runs out of the mansion and starts yelling

 

noob:everybody!help me!a dark knight is in there attacking my anna!

 

player passing by:erm,whatever dude

 

the noob runs back in just in time to see me kill the woman again

 

noob:no!you monster!

 

me:had enough?

 

noob:yes!yes!have mercy!

 

me:well i ain't stopping!*kills the woman again*

 

 

 

this still goes on like that for 10 minutes,after that i'm bored and go off to edgeville dungeon.i get an idea and add him to my friends list

 

me:i'm inside of you,you can't escape

 

me:muahahahahahahaha!

 

 

 

 

 

that's when i remove him from my friends list

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:shock: The kids on Rs are really wierd..

 

 

 

Lvl 3: Hi

 

Me: Yo

 

Lvl 3: How old are you?

 

Me: 15...You?

 

Lvl 3: 9 years old

 

Me: Cool

 

Lvl 3: Do you want to be Lesby with me?

 

Me: Ok \/\/tf leave me alone plz?

 

 

 

And I ran away... jeeze

 

 

 

... So, all the kids are weird?

Will update when I feel like it.

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Anyway, This is what happend to me once when I was playing around with my easter ring:

 

 

 

Noob: How u do that?

 

Me: Easter ring.

 

Noob: Cn i buy?

 

Me: No, not tradable.

 

Noob: Cn i hve accnt?

 

Me: You mean you want my account?

 

Noob: Ya

 

Me: No, go away.

Will update when I feel like it.

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I had this conversation once

 

 

 

Scammer (in pm): Hello. I'm part of Jagex staff, and you have been picked to receive free lifetime membership and 1 Mil gp.

 

Me (playing along): Ok. How do I receive this prize?

 

Scammer: Excellent! Now all we need is your pas

 

Me: My ******** (blanked out word is password)?

 

Scammer: Excuse me!

 

Me: My pas is "lol your reported"

 

Scammer: Kool

 

 

 

Frankly, I'm surprised people can be that stupid. Well, actually, I'm not :wink:

 

 

 

hah i got the exact same thing once. i reported him for jagex impersonation

canuckskilltheavalanche3ea.jpg

pwned

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On karajma docks

 

 

 

noob: Holy (cencored)! What is that thing? (Being attacked by a lv 19 river troll)

 

everyone: river troll

 

noob: whats that?

 

everyone: a fishing random

 

noob: can one of you kill it for me? :wall:

 

 

 

obviously doesn't know much about randoms

 

 

 

These are newbs and not noobs. They dont know about it, but at least they are friendly and dont offend you all the time. I have no problem with these kind of persons. Everyone was new once.

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-Takes place in seers bank after i get a mime random event which unlocked the climb rope emote and after doing the emote the noob asks me about it-

 

 

 

Noob-What is that

 

Me: Climb rope emote :D

 

noob: No, it looks like your driving a car

 

Me: naa, its climbing rope

 

Noob: reported for jagex staff impersonation!

 

Me: -.-

 

noob: reported for offensive language !

 

Me: Zomg my friend dropped 2mill upstairs (in the bank)

 

Noob: Climbs up stairs and doesnt come down

 

 

 

Best way to get rid of a noob :)

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