I wouldn't call gap years incredibly common, nor would I consider them to be in the best interest of myself personally. But hey, if she wants to quit life for a year, all the power to her

I think you underestimate the value of real world experience. If you think college prepares you for life, you're quite mistaken

Okay so new girl, new problem.

 

In the wake of my last breakup I found myself needing to re-structure pretty much my whole social life--due to the fact that I graduated last year but am still working at the school I graduated from (and it's a tiny school in the middle of nowhere), my circle of people I know grew a lot smaller and had a lot of overlap with my ex. So thus far I have been mostly focusing on building up a group of friends through the few people I knew from elsewhere, and by and large I have been very successful. I never find myself wanting for something to do on the weekends and even most weeknights if I am so inclined.

 

Here's where the girl problem comes in. She's a part of the main circle I've been absorbed into, and I've felt she's been flirty with me since the beginning. I haven't done anything about it thus far because I was more concerned with making these people my friends and I didn't want to charge into a situation with people who have 3+ years of history together (intertwined dating pasts and such) and [bleep] things up. But now I feel comfortable and accepted and kind of want to go for it.

 

The main problem now is that I can't read her whatsoever, which is annoying because I'm usually really good at this. She'll do the whole eye contact and then look away thing in a group setting, and we've been touchy and flirty before, but usually only while drunk. We've gotten into extended drunk conversations in which I'll test the waters, and she usually responds positively, but then will suddenly withdraw like she got spooked, and it's never in direct response to anything I do or say. She's very awkward about saying more than a brief hi to me whenever we cross paths throughout the day, which is fairly often because the place is so small. I'm not trying to overanalyze this, but it seems to me like she's probably at least a little interested and just awkward as [bleep] about it. And I know I would already have my answer if I'd actually made a move or whatever, but I haven't felt comfortable enough with everything else until now to really consider it.

 

Also, re: gap years, they're not about quitting life, they're about experiencing it.

I think you underestimate the value of real world experience. If you think college prepares you for life, you're quite mistaken

I've worked enough menial jobs to know college is something I wouldn't give up for the world. Can you be successful without school? Sure. Are those that go to and finish school more likely to attain success? Absolutely. I'm goal oriented and achievement driven. Obviously 'success' can be defined in multiple ways.

I wouldn't call gap years incredibly common, nor would I consider them to be in the best interest of myself personally. But hey, if she wants to quit life for a year, all the power to her

I wouldn't call a gap year "Quitting Life".

 

I am taking a step-back out of education/academia and taking a gap year because I am mentally exhausted from the whole ordeal of it. I am going to spend that year dedicated to me: reading, travelling, painting, taking photos and intending to 'live' life. I am aware I could do such things simultaneously but even then finding time to doesn't help me unwind.

 

After a year of living I think I will be happy to return to academic pursuits.

 

I wouldn't call gap years incredibly common, nor would I consider them to be in the best interest of myself personally. But hey, if she wants to quit life for a year, all the power to her

I wouldn't call a gap year "Quitting Life".

 

I am taking a step-back out of education/academia and taking a gap year because I am mentally exhausted from the whole ordeal of it. I am going to spend that year dedicated to me: reading, travelling, painting, taking photos and intending to 'live' life. I am aware I could do such things simultaneously but even then finding time to doesn't help me unwind.

 

After a year of living I think I will be happy to return to academic pursuits.

I'm on a scholarship that wouldn't allow me to take a year off. Perhaps being monetarily bound to said scholarship has given me more incentive to cope with the stress and rise above it.

 

 

I wouldn't call gap years incredibly common, nor would I consider them to be in the best interest of myself personally. But hey, if she wants to quit life for a year, all the power to her

I wouldn't call a gap year "Quitting Life".

 

I am taking a step-back out of education/academia and taking a gap year because I am mentally exhausted from the whole ordeal of it. I am going to spend that year dedicated to me: reading, travelling, painting, taking photos and intending to 'live' life. I am aware I could do such things simultaneously but even then finding time to doesn't help me unwind.

 

After a year of living I think I will be happy to return to academic pursuits.

 

I'm on a scholarship that wouldn't allow me to take a year off. Perhaps being monetarily bound to said scholarship has given me more incentive to cope with the stress and rise above it.

 

This is a year off *after* my undergraduate degree is completed. NGL, I will be 23 years old who hasn't gone on holiday since 2009. Been bouncing between Working and higher education since 2009.

Okay so new girl, new problem.

 

In the wake of my last breakup I found myself needing to re-structure pretty much my whole social life--due to the fact that I graduated last year but am still working at the school I graduated from (and it's a tiny school in the middle of nowhere), my circle of people I know grew a lot smaller and had a lot of overlap with my ex. So thus far I have been mostly focusing on building up a group of friends through the few people I knew from elsewhere, and by and large I have been very successful. I never find myself wanting for something to do on the weekends and even most weeknights if I am so inclined.

 

Here's where the girl problem comes in. She's a part of the main circle I've been absorbed into, and I've felt she's been flirty with me since the beginning. I haven't done anything about it thus far because I was more concerned with making these people my friends and I didn't want to charge into a situation with people who have 3+ years of history together (intertwined dating pasts and such) and [bleep] things up. But now I feel comfortable and accepted and kind of want to go for it.

 

The main problem now is that I can't read her whatsoever, which is annoying because I'm usually really good at this. She'll do the whole eye contact and then look away thing in a group setting, and we've been touchy and flirty before, but usually only while drunk. We've gotten into extended drunk conversations in which I'll test the waters, and she usually responds positively, but then will suddenly withdraw like she got spooked, and it's never in direct response to anything I do or say. She's very awkward about saying more than a brief hi to me whenever we cross paths throughout the day, which is fairly often because the place is so small. I'm not trying to overanalyze this, but it seems to me like she's probably at least a little interested and just awkward as [bleep] about it. And I know I would already have my answer if I'd actually made a move or whatever, but I haven't felt comfortable enough with everything else until now to really consider it.

 

Also, re: gap years, they're not about quitting life, they're about experiencing it.

Just make a move regardless of the signals she's giving you. If you always wait for a girl to give you the "perfect" signals before you make a move, your dating life is going to be very uneventful :P

 

 

 

I wouldn't call gap years incredibly common, nor would I consider them to be in the best interest of myself personally. But hey, if she wants to quit life for a year, all the power to her

I wouldn't call a gap year "Quitting Life".

 

I am taking a step-back out of education/academia and taking a gap year because I am mentally exhausted from the whole ordeal of it. I am going to spend that year dedicated to me: reading, travelling, painting, taking photos and intending to 'live' life. I am aware I could do such things simultaneously but even then finding time to doesn't help me unwind.

 

After a year of living I think I will be happy to return to academic pursuits.

I'm on a scholarship that wouldn't allow me to take a year off. Perhaps being monetarily bound to said scholarship has given me more incentive to cope with the stress and rise above it.

This is a year off *after* my undergraduate degree is completed. NGL, I will be 23 years old who hasn't gone on holiday since 2009. Been bouncing between Working and higher education since 2009.

Unsure of what on holiday means (maybe what we call vacation), but I commend you for getting undergrad out of the way

 

Just make a move regardless of the signals she's giving you. If you always wait for a girl to give you the "perfect" signals before you make a move, your dating life is going to be very uneventful :P

 

 

Oh I know, and I've had plenty of eventful experiences haha. Mostly I've been hobbling myself because of aforementioned social issues. We're on spring break now anyway so I can't do anything at the moment, but my thinking has been trending towards [bleep] it, when school is back in session it's game on.

Well god damn.

I think I have gotten to an identical twin situation. Where I like them both and I have gotten the idea that they both like me aswell. Now I may be wrong, but still asking either of them out would be hard, cause they are pretty much inseparable in addition to the fact that I could offend either of them.

 

And right now I am definitely not the man to pick up twins at the same time.

Well god damn.

I think I have gotten to an identical twin situation. Where I like them both and I have gotten the idea that they both like me aswell. Now I may be wrong, but still asking either of them out would be hard, cause they are pretty much inseparable in addition to the fact that I could offend either of them.

 

And right now I am definitely not the man to pick up twins at the same time.

Well god damn.

I think I have gotten to an identical twin situation. Where I like them both and I have gotten the idea that they both like me aswell. Now I may be wrong, but still asking either of them out would be hard, cause they are pretty much inseparable in addition to the fact that I could offend either of them.

 

And right now I am definitely not the man to pick up twins at the same time.

Triplets judging by the triple post. Also you're never gonna be the man to pick up twins at the same time if you never try.

Tell one that you like her more. I don't know if that's good advice, but I'd like to see how it plays out

That's what happens when you try to post from a phone with spotty internet...

 

And I meant not yet, I am not telling it off completely.

But I should get some practice managing one girl before getting onto 2 at a time.

Make a move and if it goes poorly, tell them that your twin was the one who made the move

Its like a free do over lol

In other news:

If I wasn't sick, I'd have kissed a girl tonight.

Bloody [bleep]ing hell.

Got her number today, then talked on the phone for one and three quarters of an hour, and in the evening danced and partied.

Sent her home aswell even.

 

[bleep] me.

buuuut you've set the groundwork to meet with her again. wtf are you whining about?

^^^ It's saq

Lately instead of asking girls if they're serial killers before I pitch the meet, I've been asking them how all the other guys have been treating them on the dating site.

 

One girl was like, "I'm getting lots of messages from guys who are in their late 30s and 40s. I don't know why, I'm so young!"

 

What I wanted to say: Yeah they're messaging you because you're so young.

What I actually said: Haha that's crazy how guys like that are actually messaging you!

 

Scheduled a date with her later this week :twisted:

 

Well played Muggi, well played.

 

Did it occur to you at the time that one day you will be one of those 30 and 40 year old men messaging young girls?

Well played Muggi, well played.

Did it occur to you at the time that one day you will be one of those 30 and 40 year old men messaging young girls? For better or worse.

 

EDIT: New personal record a septuple post. Mods feel free to purge all but one if you want.

Well played Muggi, well played.

 

Did it occur to you at the time that one day you will be one of those 30 and 40 year old men messaging young girls? For better or worse.