"I want a girlfriend/boyfriend", and other such relationship advice

[Omar]

Is it possible for a first date to not be awkward? Just askin'

Eh. Yes and no. Depends on the combination of people, but one or the other will find some point awkward, even if the other doesn't. It's an interesting pair that doesn't find anything awkward.

 

A good way to break awkward silences is to comment on how much worse it would be if everyone was naked.

I'm definitely going to use that.

Same here.

[Iamdan]

Avoiding awkwardness is just about having a strong frame. Don't act awkward and they won't be, which will make it comfortable for yourself too.

[bedman]

Once somebody told me "a good friend is a friend where silences aren't awkward". I think this is very true.

[Abc1230]

Uh... I heard that (in general) females are more attracted to personality than physical appearance... Is this true?

[BlindBaker]

Uh... I heard that (in general) females are more attracted to personality than physical appearance... Is this true?

Yes, but looks definitely help if you've got them. I know the fattest, ugliest guys that have smoking hot girlfriends.

[Iamdan]

I've been saying it this whole thread. Your looks (the ones you were born with) do not matter. It's how you present and take care of yourself. Personality is also much more important for girls than it is for guys.

 

Look at the before and after shot of neil strauss:

 

 

Anyone can look great if they lose the 'i want a girl who likes me for who i am, sweatpants and all' crap,

[Abc1230]

I've been saying it this whole thread. Your looks (the ones you were born with) do not matter. It's how you present and take care of yourself. Personality is also much more important for girls than it is for guys.

 

Look at the before and after shot of neil strauss:

 

 

Anyone can look great if they lose the 'i want a girl who likes me for who i am, sweatpants and all' crap,

 

What if you can't afford plastic surgery?

[Iamdan]

He didn't get plastic surgery, the little things add up and make a huge difference. He shaved his head, got a tan and piercing, changed his hideous facial hair, spent $35 on teeth whitening, got contacts, started working out etc.

 

All you need to do is to spend a little time learning about fashion, invest more time in taking care of yourself, and not be scared of change.

[TTanT]

Is it possible for a first date to not be awkward? Just askin'

Eh. Yes and no. Depends on the combination of people, but one or the other will find some point awkward, even if the other doesn't. It's an interesting pair that doesn't find anything awkward.

 

A good way to break awkward silences is to comment on how much worse it would be if everyone was naked.

I'm definitely going to use that.

Same here.

Or to casually ask how they feel about the current economic situation.

 

Its works for me, anyways.

[Iamdan]

Talking about the economic situation? You don't attract a girl with logical and thoughtful conversation, have fun! If there is an awkward silence play [bleep] marry kill or something.

[Skull]

No.

[BlindBaker]

Eh, I'd look great if it weren't for this gigantic overbite. My family can't afford braces for me because my dad wanted a motorcycle, so now I have to go through highschool with buck teeth. Thanks Dad.

 

A tan would be nice too, but for some reason I can't tan. I burn, and then go back to being pale. Huh.

[Iamdan]

Eh, I'd look great if it weren't for this gigantic overbite. My family can't afford braces for me because my dad wanted a motorcycle, so now I have to go through highschool with buck teeth. Thanks Dad.

 

A tan would be nice too, but for some reason I can't tan. I burn, and then go back to being pale. Huh.

 

You could get a spray tan, or some of that tanning moisturizer stuff.

 

In any case I'm sure there are other things you can work on. Hair, clothing etc.

[Abc1230]

I'm confused.

 

Your personality is what matters most, right?

If you're unattractive, you need to make yourself attractive.

 

From what I'm seeing, women are just as shallow as men. I'm not trying to troll. I'm honestly confused. Does personality matter, or do you need to be hot?

[Iamdan]

Personality is important, but it won't matter most of the time if you look like a mess.

 

I'd say it's generally about 80% personality and 20% looks, and for guys it's 80% looks and 20% personality.

[Lenticular_J]

I'm confused.

 

Your personality is what matters most, right?

If you're unattractive, you need to make yourself attractive.

 

From what I'm seeing, women are just as shallow as men. I'm not trying to troll. I'm honestly confused. Does personality matter, or do you need to be hot?

Metaphor: the nicest person in the world is walking around town and giving away million-dollar bills! He'll give one to anyone who talks to him. Thing is, he's covered in blood and viscera, screaming, and is just about the ugliest [bleep] in the world!

 

Now, not knowing about his money giving-awayances, would you go talk to him?

 

The answer, my friend, is no. You would not. Because he looks wierd and unapproachable. And if he approaches you, you'll probably be a little afraid for your life, right?

 

You need to be able to present yourself so that someone's immediate opinion upon seeing you isn't "gross". Once you cover that, it's all personality.

[RpgGamer]

Personality is important, but it won't matter most of the time if you look like a mess.

 

I'd say it's generally about 80% personality and 20% looks, and for guys it's 80% looks and 20% personality.

 

 

True, but I'm calling the Shoop'd card on your example picture. Girls don't just look for physical traits. Good looking guys certainly have an advantage, but if they don't have the personality to back it up, it's pointless. A funny guy will get 10x more girls than the silent good looking guy any day. If you have a good personality, your set. If you don't believe me, look around at your fellow students. You'll be able to pick out the "attractive" personality types in a matter of seconds. The quiet guy in the corner? no. The guy that stands tall and proud, making the whole room laugh. That's attractive. I've witnessed this for years, and personality>looks for any girl.

 

The problem is fitting your personality out to be attractive

 

EDIT:

I forgot to add that good looks will get the girls to come to you, but good persoanlity means you have to go to them more often than not. It requires a bit more effort, but what do you care? You're persoanlity is great :)

[Iamdan]

I'm confused. You seem to be under the impression what I said contradicted what you said.

 

Personality is the main thing, but you need to present yourself well physically too.

[RpgGamer]

I'm confused. You seem to be under the impression what I said contradicted what you said.

 

Personality is the main thing, but you need to present yourself well physically too.

 

 

bottom line?

I agree.

 

I was just trying to expand on the idea.

[Tim]

I dunno about you, but with the Heat in Newcastle (@Dan) you're more likely to end up burnt and red then tanned, despite my attempts to tan, Sunblock/oil or whatever doesnt help with 40 degree heat + heat wind.

[RpgGamer]

I dunno about you, but with the Heat in Newcastle (@Dan) you're more likely to end up burnt and red then tanned, despite my attempts to tan, Sunblock/oil or whatever doesnt help with 40 degree heat + heat wind.

 

 

Orange isn't sexy.

...

Neither is casper white, but fake tans are just laughable. If your going for the tan look, just step outside for a few hours. Yes, you'll burn the first time or two, but your body will get accustomed to it and retain a more natural color. Unless you're albino. Or Irish.

[TTanT]

Talking about the economic situation? You don't attract a girl with logical and thoughtful conversation, have fun! If there is an awkward silence play [bleep] marry kill or something.

 

 

Who said it was a thoughtful, logical question? As a matter of fact, I have only gotten serious answers three times. And only one of those three times was from a girl.

 

What response you get all depends on how you ask the question. It also helps that most of the girls I know are nearly as nerdy as I am.... :geek:

 

But I also have a reputation for spouting unrelated crud. Some find it funny, some find it irritating.

 

Oddly enough, only girls in the former category tend to be interested.

[Wisp]

I'm confused. You seem to be under the impression what I said contradicted what you said.

 

Personality is the main thing, but you need to present yourself well physically too.

No. Depends on the girl.

Saying personality is always more important is like saying the only thing that all men care about in relationships is sex.

That being said, for most people personality is important. I wouldn't date an [wagon], but I'd be more likely to date a really good looking guy who was kind of a jerk than a hideous one. Call it shallow, but it's the truth.

 

The reason why most people are ugly is because of things they can change. Bad skin, weight, lack of muscles, hair, all things that can be changed. Sure, some people at the base are more attractive than others, but anyone can look good if they put effort into it.

silent good looking guy any day

You'd be surprised, a lot of girls like shyer guys (especially those who are naturally good looking), but still, you have a point.

 

So what I'm saying is that looks matter. To some more than others. Personality is important, very important, but looks are as well. I'm just being honest with this.

[Jeffwilson99]

 

silent good looking guy any day

You'd be surprised, a lot of girls like shyer guys (especially those who are naturally good looking), but still, you have a point.

 

So what I'm saying is that looks matter. To some more than others. Personality is important, very important, but looks are as well. I'm just being honest with this.

 

 

Yeah my friend is like thats, and was like that throughout school (The quiet, good looking guy) and pretty much all the girls in our year (and the years above and below) liked him. I think sometimes girls are attracted to these kind of guys because they are kind of mysterious, and while he didn't put himself out there much, no-one thought he was a poser, or a jerk, or attention seeking etc...

[Iamdan]

I dunno about you, but with the Heat in Newcastle (@Dan) you're more likely to end up burnt and red then tanned, despite my attempts to tan, Sunblock/oil or whatever doesnt help with 40 degree heat + heat wind.

 

tbh I'm not that tan either. Not being tan shouldn't hurt unless you're really pale.

 

I'm confused. You seem to be under the impression what I said contradicted what you said.

 

Personality is the main thing, but you need to present yourself well physically too.

No. Depends on the girl.

Saying personality is always more important is like saying the only thing that all men care about in relationships is sex.

That being said, for most people personality is important. I wouldn't date an [wagon], but I'd be more likely to date a really good looking guy who was kind of a jerk than a hideous one. Call it shallow, but it's the truth.

 

The reason why most people are ugly is because of things they can change. Bad skin, weight, lack of muscles, hair, all things that can be changed. Sure, some people at the base are more attractive than others, but anyone can look good if they put effort into it.

 

That's basically what I've been saying, I posted the before and after shots of style and everything :wall:

 

silent good looking guy any day

You'd be surprised, a lot of girls like shyer guys (especially those who are naturally good looking), but still, you have a point.

That's my 'thing,' I don't give away much at first and slowly come out with the interesting stuff about me as she qualifies herself. (I do it naturally, not saying I plan it) I think it works because the girl feels like more is being shared with her than most other girls, which makes her feel special and helps with comfort etc.