Please help! My friend is suicidal. =(

[Bauke]

A few people already posted it, but I'd like to emphasize the need of professional help. You can't help her on your own.

[jokemaster]

Be supportive of what she's feeling, just listen if she has to talk, don't be bossy or try to tell her that she's stupid or that "her life is so great why should she be suicidal?" It might make him feel worse. Try to be positive to what she wants in life besides suicide (perhaps if she feels like there is something missing in her life, or has a goal that she feels is not possible to reach).

 

 

 

It might not be a good idea to tell her parents, they might be part of the problem not part of the solution, and you don't want to make her life any worse, if she's already at that point of wanting to die.

 

 

 

Listen but don't be judgemental.

[Ginger_Warrior]

It might not be a good idea to tell her parents, they might be part of the problem not part of the solution, and you don't want to make her life any worse, if she's already at that point of wanting to die.

 

If suicide is a concern, the general advice is to tell an adult you trust in confidence. This does not necessarily mean the parent(s), but could include a teacher, a school counsellor/nurse, the subject's GP, a youth leader, a magistrate, etc..

[dsavi]

Is there some sort of hotline where you can call to get advice on something like that, like a suicide hotline? Or is that only for people who are wanting to kill themselves?

[warren211]

Is there some sort of hotline where you can call to get advice on something like that, like a suicide hotline? Or is that only for people who are wanting to kill themselves?

 

 

 

I'm sure most suicide hotlines accept calls from concerned loved ones. In fact, that's probably where a lot of calls come from. So if you can find a local suicide hotline, you could consider calling it but what's most important for now is to get real professional help, as about a dozen people have said. Of course, always be there for her 100% of the time because friends are one of the few lifelines she has.

[megakiller32]

Tell him to quit wasting time and make a decision.

 

 

 

I kid, I kid. Get a professional to help her, not a bunch of tip.iters.

 

But seriously, tell her the first option.

 

 

 

But that is one insane situation. First thing to sort out- Home life for her. Second, School. Work from there.

[The Observer]

Shes 18, cronic cutter, no self esteem what so ever.

 

Really [cabbage] situation at home, her mom just killed herself three days ago right in front of her, she had her blood on her face and everything.

 

the step mom she has that she moved in with her dad hates her, she gets beat up when ever she goes to school.... Idk what to say anymore. =(

 

 

 

Holy [bleep]!

 

 

 

Damn, that's terrible.

 

 

 

Try and calm her down and maybe even voice your love towards her? That could work. Stay in contact with her as well.

[Orpheus]

Honestly, you won't be able to do too much. All you can do is get help from a counselor, magistrate, whoever, and all you can do is talk to her. I don't mean to be a [puncture], but not everything is a happy ending. Do what you can though.

[baalboy5]

Shes 18, cronic cutter, no self esteem what so ever.

 

Really [cabbage] situation at home, her mom just killed herself three days ago right in front of her, she had her blood on her face and everything.

 

the step mom she has that she moved in with her dad hates her, she gets beat up when ever she goes to school.... Idk what to say anymore. =(

 

O_O

 

Dude WTF!?^^^

[Jimmyw3000]

not sure if i should be encouraging law breaking but..just drive anyway?

 

 

 

not like you got anything to loseno offence. just dont get caught but the donut eaters. sorry, police.

[Nom]

I live in Ohio 0_o

 

 

 

What's stopping your parents from driving you? Are they callous [bleep]s or have you even told them?

[Evaluate]

Tell him to quit wasting time and make a decision.

 

 

 

If you were kidding, why the hell bother to post it in the first place. Seriously...

 

 

 

To the OP, don't let yourself fall into this too deep. As much as you care about her, you need to keep your head calm too. While one death is bad enough, we don't need you adding yourself to that if she does end up going through. From what you've said, get someone besides her parents to help with support.

[Hawks]

Make sure she knows you care about her and you will miss her a lot if she kills herself. Listen if she wants to talk. Just generally try to be there for her and maybe ask (I don't know if I'm phrasing this right) if she would be willing to try to find some sort of help before you can go get her; just so you can be sure that it won't be too late or something like that.

[runescapeloser22]

Shes 18, cronic cutter, no self esteem what so ever.

 

Really [cabbage] situation at home, her mom just killed herself three days ago right in front of her, she had her blood on her face and everything.

 

the step mom she has that she moved in with her dad hates her, she gets beat up when ever she goes to school.... Idk what to say anymore. =(

 

Her mom killed herself three days ago and she already has a step mom?

[Riku3220]

I'm fairly sure her parents were divorce and her dad was remarried

[user1991]

I'm sorry, but I call BS.

 

 

 

If you really wanted help there is absolutely no way you would come to the conclusion that a runescape based off topic board is the best way of helping this girl.

 

 

 

You'd either call the appropriate authorities or go to a suicide help forum, of which there are many.

[user1991]

Theres a suicide hotline I think.

 

 

 

I'll pray for her.

 

 

 

:pray:

 

 

 

Good luck with that one

[Furah]

Another thing you should do is keep your mobile phone with you all the time, charge it every night, and ALWAYS have it set so you will hear it, if there is a place where they don't normally allow you to have phones (such as school) talk with the principal or whoever about getting an exception as you want to be able to talk with her whenever she wants to, due to her being in a difficult situation and feeling like she has no reason to live.

[Lenticular_J]

I'm sorry, but I call BS.

 

 

 

If you really wanted help there is absolutely no way you would come to the conclusion that a runescape based off topic board is the best way of helping this girl.

 

 

 

You'd either call the appropriate authorities or go to a suicide help forum, of which there are many.

 

Why do we debate God on these boards? Why don't we run to the streets and demand people talk to us?

 

 

 

Theres a suicide hotline I think.

 

 

 

I'll pray for her.

 

 

 

:pray:

 

 

 

Good luck with that one

 

Don't be a [bleep] because people like to help others.

 

 

 

Oh, yeah, helping. Sorry, that just made me really mad. I've never had to deal with anything like this, and I usually just make people angry at me when they're sad. I say get her some pro help, though.

[Legosimx]

I'm praying for you both. I wish you luck, the very best luck. We just went over this in Health class. Get her to see someone. And you need to tell an adult, or find out the suicide hotline for her state. Get her help. Call 911. Anything!!

[The Dark Lord]

It sounds like a plea for help right now. If she was really hell-bent on killing herself, there really isn't much you can do. Regardless, she's obviously asking for help. Do the best that you can.

 

 

 

The most beneficial thing that you can do for yourself is to calm down. If the worst case scenario happens and she does severely hurt herself, you definitely do not want to feel as if you are a failure and blame everything on yourself. It really isn't your fault.

 

 

 

Wrist-cutting isn't necessarily a suicide attempt, but rather a primitive way of releasing emotional pain. However, it is a sign that the person is likely to harbor suicidal thoughts, which definitely must be dealt with. Medicine doesn't always work, either.

 

 

 

By the way, I'm almost 17 and I haven't even studied for my driver's permit yet. :|

[dsavi]

Theres a suicide hotline I think.

 

I'll pray for her.

 

:pray:

 

Good luck with that one

 

Don't be a [bleep] because people like to help others.

 

I can for one of the first times say that I honestly agree with you there.

[Ginger_Warrior]

Theres a suicide hotline I think.

 

I'll pray for her.

 

:pray:

 

Good luck with that one

 

Don't be a [bleep] because people like to help others.

 

I can for one of the first times say that I honestly agree with you there.

 

Indeed.

 

 

 

The people caring for someone contemplating suicide also have to be looked after. It can be incredibly tiring and traumatic for the people involved. If this dude finds some strength by getting advice from here or using it as a place to talk about it with someone, good. If he finds strength from religion to help him deal with this, good.

[oegly41]

What the [bleep] am I thinking? I have my psychology book right here! I can play a psychologist on the internet. (Well, it's not really psychology, but a special version of social studies with more weight on psychology and political correctness. I don't think any information would hurt.)

 

 

 

It seems like she is going through a psychological crisis released by a sudden event. From her previous story, it seems like she has some kind of depression. A psychological crisis on top of a depression is never good.

 

 

 

There are four phases of a psychological crisis:

 

(Note that she can be between two phases)

 

 

 

Shock: Can last for a few seconds to a few days. She doesn't manage to really understand what has happened. She might seem calm, but her insides are dominated by chaos. The body may react with shaking, noxiousness, sweat, tenseness and breathing problems. Panic or isolation is not unusual.

 

 

 

Reaction: Dominated by strong feelings and intense reactions. She is starting to understand what has happened. Denial is very possible. She can also think that she is being punished.

 

 

 

Repairing: Mostly like the reaction phase, but reliving the incident does not happen as often. She understands more and more about what happened. She is starting to accept it. She stops fooling herself, and stops avoiding the pain. She is ready to talk about it. The symptoms of the shock might start decreasing.

 

 

 

Reorientation: She is finally starting to completely accept it, let the incident take less control of her life and plan ahead. Life seems worth living again.

 

 

 

The image I have, is that she is in the reaction phase, or possibly somewhere between the shock phase and the reaction phase. She needs help to get to go into the repairing phase. The key is to let her know that you are sad because she is upset, and that you understand her.

 

 

 

If she is like me, she is not actually planning to immediately kill herself. She is just saying that as a cry for help. But be aware, in the situation she is in, very little is needed to get her over the edge. I've tried to kill myself two times in the last few months; once when I almost failed my mid-term and once when I missed a bus... Still, she is not me, so I don't know how similar we are. Do you know if she is ready to talk to anyone? If she is OK with it, I'd be glad to speak to her somehow, through Skype, some IM program or something.

[ProtoGuy]

I just wanted to thank all of you... This means more than you know for me.

 

Please, if you have any more advice, let me know.

 

I appreciate all of your support and prayers, her name is Paine, for those of you who are praying.

 

For more information, we text daily still and I try to talk to her at least once a day on the phone, and I think she's doing alot better...

 

But yeah, I'm still reminding her how much I care about her, how much she means to me.

 

Again... thank you, all of you.

 

 

 

As to answer a few of the main questions:

 

 

 

 

If you really wanted help there is absolutely no way you would come to the conclusion that a runescape based off topic board is the best way of helping this girl.

 

You'd either call the appropriate authorities or go to a suicide help forum, of which there are many.

 

 

 

I don't know of any and this place is one that I have people who know me and I can trust them.

 

 

 

 

Her mom killed herself three days ago and she already has a step mom?

 

 

 

She never knew she had a dad, much less that he had re-married.

 

Don't ask.

 

 

 

 

What's stopping your parents from driving you? Are they callous [bleep]s or have you even told them?

 

I live with my uncle, and they don't actually know anything yet...