abdussattar Posted August 10, 2007 Share Posted August 10, 2007 A black man walks into a cafe one early morning and noticed that he was the only black man there. As he sat down, he noticed a white man behind him. The white man said, "Colored people are not allowed here." The black man turned around and stood up. He then said:" When I was born I was black, When I grew up I was black, When I'm sick I'm black, When I go in the sun I'm black, When I'm cold I'm black, When I die I'll be black. But you sir...When you're born you're pink, When you grow up you're white, When you're sick, you're green, When you go in the sun you turn red, When you're cold you turn blue, And when you die you turn purple. And you have the nerve to call me colored?" The black man then sat back down and the white man walked away... If i got 1gp for everytime sum1 said the word "noob",I would have a full p hat set.nahhh ill continue mis-spelling^!click for blog!^sigs by: woopidoo2|yaff2|4be2jue|me|guthix121 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
minirouge13 Posted August 10, 2007 Share Posted August 10, 2007 i would find that offencive but nto really its funny Last edited by minirouge13 on an unknown date, edited 9,999 time in totalhttp://img.world-of-dungeons.net/wod/design/playthisgame/en/wod_1.jpg Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nathansbf Posted August 10, 2007 Share Posted August 10, 2007 A kid was sitting on his lawn with a box of puppies one morning. George Bush was on his morning run, accompanied by some Secret Service workers. Dubya asked the boy what kind of puppies were in the box. The little boy said, "Republicans." The President beamed, patted the boy on the head, and said, "Atta boy!" A few weeks later Bush was jogging again, this time with * Cheney in tow. Bush stopped at the boy's house, winked at * and said, "Hey kid, what kind of pupies are in the box?" The boy said, "Democracts" Bush looked crushed, saying, "What happened? A few weeks ago they were Republicans!" The boy said, "Well, the puppies opened their eyes." Dunno if political humour is appreciated by the kids here, at least I like it :) When we lose our libraries because we funded corrupt homosexual rights clubs more than we do public school systems, we'll have you to thank. 1. that joke was hilarious 2.I really didn't appreciate that comment :evil: ????? ?? (victory is ours)????? ???? ???? ????? ?????? ?? ???? ????. (A prince never lacks legitimate reasons to break his promise.)-- Niccolo Machiavelli Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nathansbf Posted August 10, 2007 Share Posted August 10, 2007 What is sadder than hearing that 4 emos just died in a car crash? Hearing there was room for 1 more... hell yes! I love that ????? ?? (victory is ours)????? ???? ???? ????? ?????? ?? ???? ????. (A prince never lacks legitimate reasons to break his promise.)-- Niccolo Machiavelli Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
abdussattar Posted August 12, 2007 Share Posted August 12, 2007 Jim, Jack, and Fred were at a convention together and were sharing a large suite on the top of a 75 story mess. After a long day of meetings, they were shocked to hear that the elevators in the hotel were broken and they would have to climb 75 flights of stairs to get to their room. Jack said to Jim and Fred: "Let's break the montony of this unpleasant task by concentrating on something interesting. I'll tell jokes for 25 flights, Jim can sing for 25 flights, and Fred can tell sad stories for the rest of the way." At the 26th floor, jack stopped telling jokes, and Jim began singing. At the 51st floor, Jim stopped singing, and Fred began to tell stories. "I'll tell my sadest story first," he said. "I left the room key in the car." In a class on abnormal phtchology, the instructor was about to introduce the subject of manic depression. She posed this question to her students: "How would you diagnose a patient who walks back and forth screaming at the top of their lungs one minute, then sits down weeping the next?" A young man in the rear raised his hand and suggested earnestly, "A football coach?" OMG! both of them made me fall off my chair laughing... :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: If i got 1gp for everytime sum1 said the word "noob",I would have a full p hat set.nahhh ill continue mis-spelling^!click for blog!^sigs by: woopidoo2|yaff2|4be2jue|me|guthix121 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
minirouge13 Posted August 15, 2007 Share Posted August 15, 2007 i got a good one the best one ya ever heard [hide=rofl this is funny] sorry that was the joke :) [/hide] Last edited by minirouge13 on an unknown date, edited 9,999 time in totalhttp://img.world-of-dungeons.net/wod/design/playthisgame/en/wod_1.jpg Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
abdussattar Posted August 15, 2007 Share Posted August 15, 2007 i got a good one the best one ya ever heard [hide=rofl this is funny] sorry that was the joke :) [/hide] :x :? :evil: :notalk: :wall: :uhh: (no offence but...)that was the worst joke ever... here's one my friend told me (i laughed for 2 days when i heard it...) there is a lemon and a banana the banana says to the lemon"ye noob! every1 presses u soooo much that u almost die" the lemon(saddened)"zOMg! ppl eat u naked dont u feel ashamed? :shame: banana: :oops: If i got 1gp for everytime sum1 said the word "noob",I would have a full p hat set.nahhh ill continue mis-spelling^!click for blog!^sigs by: woopidoo2|yaff2|4be2jue|me|guthix121 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
ThruItAll Posted August 16, 2007 Share Posted August 16, 2007 i got a good one the best one ya ever heard [hide=rofl this is funny] sorry that was the joke :) [/hide] :x :? :evil: :notalk: :wall: :uhh: (no offence but...)that was the worst joke ever... here's one my friend told me (i laughed for 2 days when i heard it...) there is a lemon and a banananana the bananana says to the lemon"ye noob! every1 presses u soooo much that u almost die" the lemon(saddened)"zOMg! ppl eat u naked dont u feel ashamed? :shame: bananana: :oops: That sucked as much as runescapes censors.... :shame: No joke sorry, but what is a bananana? Should be banana. I would be lying if I said you could spell. danke Schon Sam!^^"Blood runs thicker, oh were thick as thieves you know"-Carl Barât Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
goldphishies Posted August 17, 2007 Share Posted August 17, 2007 One I just heard... laughed forever. One day, a bird was complaining to a bull because he couldn't reach the top of a tree. The bull said,"I have a suggestion. Eat my crap eveyday, for a week, and you'll make it to the top. It'll make you big and strong." So, the bird did as he said. Gradually, he fattened up, and got bigger and stronger, until he could reach the top of the tree. But then the owner of the bull came out, saw the bird, and grabbed a shotgun, killing the bird, while shouting "Meat for a month there!" Moral of the story: Bull(snot) will get you to the top, but it won't keep you there. :lol: [>>Thanks to Yaff2 for Reaper,Trooper,and DOOM sigs, Navyplaya for nature sigs, Hardwick246 for gold sig, ThruItAll for Darkwatch and guitar sigs, and Aijiru for avvy!<<][>>Refresh for new Siggie!<<] Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
abdussattar Posted August 17, 2007 Share Posted August 17, 2007 grr looks like i should tie myself to my chair im falling out again and again :lol: ... If i got 1gp for everytime sum1 said the word "noob",I would have a full p hat set.nahhh ill continue mis-spelling^!click for blog!^sigs by: woopidoo2|yaff2|4be2jue|me|guthix121 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
minirouge13 Posted August 17, 2007 Share Posted August 17, 2007 i gotta joke theres a guy and he walks into a bar Last edited by minirouge13 on an unknown date, edited 9,999 time in totalhttp://img.world-of-dungeons.net/wod/design/playthisgame/en/wod_1.jpg Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Blaze The Movie Fan Posted August 17, 2007 Share Posted August 17, 2007 i gotta joke theres a guy and he walks into a bar That's it? This joke sucks. If you want a real joke, see the funny "I'm you" in the Rush Hour 3 movie. :thumbsup: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Id_Suge Posted August 22, 2007 Share Posted August 22, 2007 i gotta joke theres a guy and he walks into a bar An actual semi-funny version of that is :Three guys walk into a bar...The fourth one ducks. I have one: So a guy is sitting in a bar. He gets up, sets a shot glass on the table, and tells the bartender, "I bet you $500 that I can pee into the shot glass from five feet away, without getting any on your bar." The bartender knowing that this would be impossible takes the bet. The guy steps back and pees all over the bar. The bartender between bouts of laughing asks, "Why'd you do that? That was impossible, why did you insist on wasting $500?" The man then says, "I did it because that man at the table over there bet me $5000 that you wouldn't willing let me pee all your bar. It looks like he lost." Heres a hammer, some planks and a few nails, now all you gotta do is build a bridge and get over it. Id Suge- Latin for "Suck It" Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
RpgGamer Posted August 23, 2007 Share Posted August 23, 2007 i gotta joke theres a guy and he walks into a bar is that like the dislexic man who walked into a bra? Quote Quote Anyone who likes tacos is incapable of logic. Anyone who likes logic is incapable of tacos. PSA: SaqPrets is an Estonian Dude Steam: NippleBeardTM Origin: Brand_New_iPwn Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
nomadmike Posted August 25, 2007 Share Posted August 25, 2007 :? Some don't get my joke. 2 pretzels are walking down the street at night. One is asalted :-w :anxious: Get it? Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
JamieMcMe Posted August 25, 2007 Share Posted August 25, 2007 Did you know that you can get a trip across the channel for a Euro? They put you in a boat, give you an oar and say "You row!" Sig by me :D1337 total as of 3/2/08 at 14 : 52 GMT. Recieved 1338 total 32 minutes laterHawt Pixel avvy by JopieBarrow drops: (2) - Verac's Brassard, Ahrim's Hood Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bluejayfan94 Posted August 27, 2007 Share Posted August 27, 2007 A panda walked into a restaurant and bought a burger. Once he had finished it, he took out a pistol and shot the cashier. The manager burst out and said to the panda, "Why did you shoot the cashier?" The panda replied,"I'm a panda. Look me up in the dictionary." The manager found a dictionary and looked up "panda". It said in the dictionary: a black and white bear that eats shoots and leaves. AWWW COME ON!!! I WAS GONNA SAY THAT ONE! :evil: :evil: If con is the opposite of pro, then what is the opposite of progress? I think you typed it wrong. Or Im thinking about another joke... :-k HomerSPC's Lets Plays : : Minecraft, Portal, Halo and more! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bluejayfan94 Posted August 27, 2007 Share Posted August 27, 2007 Jim, Jack, and Fred were at a convention together and were sharing a large suite on the top of a 75 story mess. After a long day of meetings, they were shocked to hear that the elevators in the hotel were broken and they would have to climb 75 flights of stairs to get to their room. Jack said to Jim and Fred: "Let's break the montony of this unpleasant task by concentrating on something interesting. I'll tell jokes for 25 flights, Jim can sing for 25 flights, and Fred can tell sad stories for the rest of the way." At the 26th floor, jack stopped telling jokes, and Jim began singing. At the 51st floor, Jim stopped singing, and Fred began to tell stories. "I'll tell my sadest story first," he said. "I left the room key in the car." In a class on abnormal phtchology, the instructor was about to introduce the subject of manic depression. She posed this question to her students: "How would you diagnose a patient who walks back and forth screaming at the top of their lungs one minute, then sits down weeping the next?" A young man in the rear raised his hand and suggested earnestly, "A football coach?" OMG! both of them made me fall off my chair laughing... :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :mrgreen: Stop using so many damn smilys! Anyways...(this one I made up on the spot) I walked up to a macro once. I joked around with it, asking how the numbers were and such. I even asked if it was a real person and not a machine. No answer. A few minutes later after getting back from the bank it was still there. So I joked even more. The macro turned around and said "WAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!" and ran on home. So now it leaves me wondering, are all macros so fragile? HomerSPC's Lets Plays : : Minecraft, Portal, Halo and more! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
llamster Posted August 27, 2007 Share Posted August 27, 2007 One day, an engineer died and went to Hell. Upon arriving there, he decided that Hell was not to his liking, so he set about improving it. A few days later, Satan was having a phone conversation with Saint Peter, and was telling him about the engineer. "It's great," Satan told him. "We now have air-conditioning and an elevator system." Upon hearing this, Saint Peter became infuriated and demanded that Satan bring the engineer to Heaven or he would sue. "Oh yeah?" Satan retorted. "Where are you going to find a lawyer up there?" Ah, this reminds me about the noob on the Runescape forums who was upset with the quest "Cold War" because apparently his grandparents died in the war. :wall: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
abdussattar Posted August 29, 2007 Share Posted August 29, 2007 here's a collection of my jokies ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Father:(angirily) :x Y R u holding dat stick in yer mouth? son:to be a good boy father:how? son:when the dog cought this stick u told him good doggie so i did the same too... ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- master:Go to the police and tell them that,it was night,stars were shining,dogs were barking,a theif came,climed the wall,and stold our ox. slave:(to the police)It was day,stars were barking,dogs were shining,an ox came,climbed over the theif,and took our wall... ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Child:(seeing a pen) what is this's cost? shopkeeper:ill give it free if u gimme 5$ ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- boy:(tearing up pages from his b00k) teacher:y r u tearing ur book? boy:it keeps elephants away teacher:but there r no elephants here boy:see how effective it is! ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- person1:how will u sink a submarine full of bondles? person2:just knock at the door they'll open it ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- wife:i have neck but no necklace,fingers but no rings,hands but no bracelets husband:i have wallet but no muny... ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- wife:i have neck but no necklace,fingers but no rings,hands but no bracelets husband:u have head but no brain... ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- boy:(crying) :cry: bro:y r u crying? boy:coz i have 1 bro while my sister has 2 ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- sir:how does a chicken come outta an egg boy:first tell me how does it go in the egg... ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- sir:wats the full form of MATHS? student:Mentally Effected Teachers Harrasing Students ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- man:waiter! there's a fly in my soup! waiter:dont shout sire or every1 else will want 1 too ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- sum1:which is yer fav b day gift? boy:a flute coz my mom gives me 10$ everyday for not playing it! ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- man:this food is stale!!! waiter:no way! how do u know? man:there is a bad smell coming from it waiter:ohh i forgot to bath... ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- boxx:i've heard uve lost the key of the bank safe clerk:yes sire one of teh keys have been lost boss:where is the other one? clerk:in teh safe... ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- elephent:oh no! my father found me meeting with u ant:no prob hide behind me ill take care of him ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- friend:ur so white which cream do u use? friend 2:fair and lovely which one do u use? friend:cherry blossom...cherry blossom is black shoe polish{/size] ---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- hope u liked em... :lol: If i got 1gp for everytime sum1 said the word "noob",I would have a full p hat set.nahhh ill continue mis-spelling^!click for blog!^sigs by: woopidoo2|yaff2|4be2jue|me|guthix121 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Bluejayfan94 Posted September 2, 2007 Share Posted September 2, 2007 HAHA!!! Those made me fall off my chair. (Not once, but many times) :lol: HomerSPC's Lets Plays : : Minecraft, Portal, Halo and more! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
champion Posted September 3, 2007 Share Posted September 3, 2007 I just made this joke up :wink:. One day, a lunatic Runescape player wrote a letter to Jagex. He wrote "make me a member now or i will kill myself!!!11" and sent the letter via the website. The next day he got a reply. He knew he would be a member for sure now. But the message said, "Thank you for your letter. Unfortuantely, we have a large amount of requests from our free players, so many that we can't read them all. Why not become a member?" What do you think? :lol: Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
abdussattar Posted September 5, 2007 Share Posted September 5, 2007 I just made this joke up :wink:. One day, a lunatic Runescape player wrote a letter to Jagex. He wrote "make me a member now or i will kill myself!!!11" and sent the letter via the website. The next day he got a reply. He knew he would be a member for sure now. But the message said, "Thank you for your letter. Unfortuantely, we have a large amount of requests from our free players, so many that we can't read them all. Why not become a member?" What do you think? :lol: :XD: its good If i got 1gp for everytime sum1 said the word "noob",I would have a full p hat set.nahhh ill continue mis-spelling^!click for blog!^sigs by: woopidoo2|yaff2|4be2jue|me|guthix121 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
robgrout Posted September 7, 2007 Share Posted September 7, 2007 4chavs go off a cliff in a nova whats wrong with that? -a nova has 5 seats what do you call 1000 chavs at the bottom of a lake? -a start... how do you stop a chav from drowning? -take your foot off his head what do chavs use for protection during sex? - a bus stop what do you call a chav in a suit ? - the defendant what dose a chav with a job say? -fries with that? i got a few more but some are inaproriate to tipit some have been used and some i cant remeber properly if i remeber them ill edit and add them in (and oh if your a chav ............. wtf are you doing on T.I.F???) Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Tbfgraphx14 Posted September 8, 2007 Share Posted September 8, 2007 [hide=is it ok] [hide=if I make] [hide=one of these] [hide=things] [hide=where] [hide=you cant] [hide=stop] [hide=clicking] [hide=?] [hide=well] [hide=ok] [hide=if] [hide=i must] [hide=so] [hide=how was your day] [hide=mine was good] [hide=i lost a couple $] [hide=on the ground] [hide=hopefully someone] [hide=who needed it] [hide=picked it up] [hide=is futurama] [hide=on tonight] [hide=i like that show] [hide=bender owns] [hide=and fry is ok] [hide=but i already did] [hide=well] [hide=i must be going] [hide=so here is] [hide=the ending] [hide=NOW] [hide=just kidding] [hide=i think you] [hide=are stuck] [hide=with me] [hide=forever] [hide=or are you?] [hide=perhaps] [hide=maybe no] [hide=so possibly not] [hide=3.141592653589793238462643383279502884197] [hide=seriously i know all that] [hide=just when you thought i was gonna...] [hide=END] :-k :-k :-k :-k :-k [/hide] [/hide] [/hide] [/hide] [/hide] [/hide] [/hide] [/hide] [/hide] [/hide] [/hide] [/hide] [/hide] [/hide] [/hide] [/hide] [/hide] [/hide] [/hide] [/hide] [/hide] [/hide] [/hide] [/hide] [/hide] [/hide] [/hide] [/hide] [/hide] [/hide] [/hide] [/hide] [/hide] [/hide] [/hide] [/hide] [/hide] [/hide] [/hide] [/hide] [/hide] [/hide] [/hide] [/hide] [/hide] Tbfgraphx14Happy to find I'm not the only one who eats glass. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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