That e-mail is pretentiousness out the [wagon]. I'm not [bleep]ing kidding. Sure, there are some logically sound points, but goddamn the whole thing reeks of a condescending tone.

That e-mail is pretentiousness out the [wagon]. I'm not [bleep]ing kidding. Sure, there are some logically sound points, but goddamn the whole thing reeks of a condescending tone.

 

Yeah, we'll put those aside because people on his newsletter list don't usually care what kind of guy DD is, only about the advice.

That e-mail is pretentiousness out the [wagon]. I'm not [bleep]ing kidding. Sure, there are some logically sound points, but goddamn the whole thing reeks of a condescending tone.

Arrogance is a better word. But I don't really care. Good advice or whatever, I don't need to use it thankfully.

OKAY YOU GAISE.

HOW DO GIRLS FLIRT?

OTHER THAN CLEAVAGEY SHIRTS.

HOW DOES A GIRL FLIRT.

JERK I KNOW WANTS TO KNOW. SO TELL.

 

SRSLY U GUYS

U GUYS

SRSLY.

THIS IS A SUPER CEREAL QUESTION.

no trollin yo.

for some reason i seem to play 2 roles, either

 

a) the hard to get guy, flirts, but doesn't commit to a lady

B) the guy who throws himself at a girl expecting she'd be the same, but utterly leads to failure and being denied.

 

so my experiences i seem to just be on the end of failure, yet on the other hand, somehow i can get ladies to find me attractive, find me and even say i'm very datable and sweet, caring and all that gooshy stuff, only downside is that i got a quick mood swing when it comes to certain situations and such to where they just are like "eff you, bye." to be honest, i didn't know showing extra attention is really such a bad thing, i would think a lady would like to know a guy is focused on her and is willing to show her all of/ the majority of his attentiona nd that he's faithful, yet they turn around and make it into a negative thing.

 

thus why ive pretty much been single the majority of my life, as i just can't seem to figure out even a percentage of what a girl is looking for in me as they always change up what they say.

OKAY YOU GAISE.

HOW DO GIRLS FLIRT?

OTHER THAN CLEAVAGEY SHIRTS.

HOW DOES A GIRL FLIRT.

JERK I KNOW WANTS TO KNOW. SO TELL.

 

SRSLY U GUYS

U GUYS

SRSLY.

THIS IS A SUPER CEREAL QUESTION.

no trollin yo.

 

When she tells you to stop stalking her, it actually means she likes you.

 

to be honest, i didn't know showing extra attention is really such a bad thing, i would think a lady would like to know a guy is focused on her and is willing to show her all of/ the majority of his attentiona nd that he's faithful, yet they turn around and make it into a negative thing.

 

thus why ive pretty much been single the majority of my life, as i just can't seem to figure out even a percentage of what a girl is looking for in me as they always change up what they say.

 

Of course girls say that. But in reality they want to be known as the emotional one, so when a guy one-ups them it's usually not a good thing.

 

It's probably best to ignore what they say they want and just give them what you want to give them. If the relationship lasts for a while, then it will probably last for a longer while since you're obviously giving them what they really do want. If it doesn't, trial and error my friend. ;)

Forgive me for stereotyping but why can girls talk to you fine on Facebook, text messages, IM etc. but when you see them face to face they're complete [bleep]es? I asked her out about 6 months ago and after that I got completely friend zoned and she told me she liked my best friend. So I even hooked them up and they're going out now. It's tough for me, but I'm honestly fine with it. The problem is that we talk night and day through texts and such but in real life it's a completely different story. Is it really that hard for girls to get over?

OKAY YOU GAISE.

HOW DO GIRLS FLIRT?

OTHER THAN CLEAVAGEY SHIRTS.

HOW DOES A GIRL FLIRT.

JERK I KNOW WANTS TO KNOW. SO TELL.

 

SRSLY U GUYS

U GUYS

SRSLY.

THIS IS A SUPER CEREAL QUESTION.

no trollin yo.

 

When she tells you to stop stalking her, it actually means she likes you.

 

 

Removed because a certain someone made a TIF account.

You consider each other a committed boyfriend/girlfriend when you haven't even kissed yet? :S

I don't call girls my girlfriends. EVER. Nah, but it would take a lot for me to call a girl my girlfriend. And I would have extremely high standards to be committed, although I have quite low standards for fun.

 

Speaking of, I have a date. See you.

You consider each other a committed boyfriend/girlfriend when you haven't even kissed yet? :S

 

Removed because a certain someone made a TIF account.

 

I'm [bleep]ing my life up so bad. I just need to vent, because lord knows no one's going to understand it. No one in my real life does. No one will here. If I were anyone but myself, I'd want to kill me. I hate this. My ex broke up with her boyfriend who she shouldn't have been with in the first place. I've been appointed to watching her for suicidal signs, meanwhile she's trying to seduce me into being in another relationahip with her. The problem is - it's working. Me and my girlfriend [current] have been having some fundamental issues lately. I can't see us lasting, but she's really the only thing keeping me from falling back into the arms of my old addiciton.

 

However, there's a new plot twist. It turns out my ex has been sleeping with this guy [who she only knew for like a month, which is when they started dating - only a WEEK after we broke up] like constantly. And I just found out today. Through a mutual friend that can't keep her mouth shut. And I friggin FLIPPED. Like FLIPPED. Like trashed me ex's basement flipped. Like trashed her backyard flipped. Like practically had a seizure flipped. I couldn't stop shaking and quivering and yelling for a good 5 hours. I was scaring everybody, including myself. Why? Because I'm an idiot that's in love with his ex. An ex that doesn't cease to digust him. And sicken him. And cheat on him. And just straight up do HORRIBLE things to.

 

I hate this. I want this to be over with. I don't know what I'm doing. I don't know what I'm thinking. I don't know what I'm feeling.

 

I am FREAKING OUT.

[hide=Background]

[hide=Background]

Generic Introduction here.

 

I'm in drama at my school on light crew, and this month we've been rehearsing for a statewide drama competition. Lighting people haven't had to start coming to rehearsals until last friday though. At the rehearsal on Firday I noticed a couple new people in lighting but I didn't really pay them much mind. At the end of rehearsal, Amy (the girl I went to homecoming with that turned out to be a lesbian and is in charge of lighting) told me that I had to be at the rehearsal that was this monday (MLK day so normally no school).

 

When I got there on monday, there was only one other person from lighting there, a new girl named Stacey (well I had known her before from my English class but never really talked to her or anything) who apparently was the only other one Amy told to come. Naturally I started talking to her early in the rehearsal, and as friday was literally her first day on lighting, she didn't really know all that much about it, so I showed her stuff like where to find things in the light booth, how to run the boards, etc. She was nice enough, and after I finished showing her around the booth we ended up sitting next to each other and watching the rest of the rehearsal (we didn't really have much else to do without Amy being there). We talked for most of the rest of the four hour rehearsal. I mean we did other things in between as well, like went on a little adventure throughout the open music rooms and auditorium to find something for a pit keyboardist and going up to the catwalks for a little while. As she was leaving I got her number and texted her for a little bit later in the night.

 

I didn't really talk to her that much until today, when we had another drama rehearsal (very little opportunity in the one class we have together). Though we didn't really talk much before the rehearsal (i mean we obviously both have other friends xD), She stayed by me for most of the rehearsal today too. We talked a lot again, especially when we were both in the booth running spotlights without anyone else up there, and there are a lot of breaks where we could talk.

 

By now, I want to ask her to the Snowcoming dance . It's coming up on February 6, so basically if I want to take her I'm going to have to act probably tomorrow. Now, here are the possible IOIs, I don't really know if any of them are legitimate.

-She talked to me for most of the rehearsal today even though some of her best friends were also there.

-Snowcoming eventually came up in our conversation on monday (well I sort of led it there xD), and she mentioned that she didn't have anyone to go with and didn't know if she'd even be going even though she was on student council planning it.

-I think i caught her staring at me in the light booth

-Towards the end of the rehearsal, Amy assigned her to do a spotlight and me to run the board in the auditorium. After like a minute she came down and sat next to me and started talking to me.

-Other people's relationships and that kind of stuff has come up multiple times when we talked on both days

-She always seems to follow me around in the auditorium and when Amy gives group instructions she always stands kind of close next to me.

 

Reading over this it seems kind of pathetic, but basically, does it seem like she likes me going off that? Seeing as I waited so late to post this I probably won't get a response before tomorrow when I'll probably ask her, but I just want some opinions.

[/hide]

 

I chickened out yesterday at the last minute.

 

Today, however, I asked her to snowcoming just as I was about to leave. She said maybe, and then explained that she didn't know if she could go yet or not, but if she could go then she would go with me. I guess I'll just have to see if this is a soft let-down or not, but I can hope.

 

EDIT: Guess not. She texted me later and said that she couldn't come because she had to sing at church and babysit and her parents wouldn't let her out of it or something. Ah well, at least rejections are getting easier to deal with.

[/hide]

 

If anyone was wondering what came of this...Nothing did. I talked to her on facebook later on that day (last Saturday), and everything still seemed normal. After that I didn't talk to her on Sunday at all (I didn't see her and I didn't want to look desperate by starting to text her), and I didn't see her on monday either as she had been put into a different English class at the semester.

 

Tuesday was the next rehearsal and as such it was the next time I saw her, but something was different. She dropped basically all of the IOIs (thought they were admittedly small in the first place) that she had been giving me all last week and she spent all the time she could away from light crew and with her other friends in the pit (band members, its a musical). We started talking again on wednesday, but it was still awkward and I just ran out of things to talk about, and by Thursday I had started to accept it.

 

However, on Thursday things changed direction again. We had started talking a bit, but it still was nothing like last week. the light crew started playing truth or dare in the light booth, and someone asked her who she was crushing on most right now. She quickly turned around and looked out the window and said that she didn't want to say because they might be in the auditorium and she didn't want them to hear. I didn't know if she actually liked someone in the pit (she doesn't talk to any of the actors) or if it was a coverup, but I started hoping it was the latter.

 

Yesterday was the first competition, and I again dropped any thoughts of her liking me as she basically stopped talking to me again. By then. I wasn't worried about it anymore and just talked to other people up until the competition. Our school got a first division rating on the play, and the light crew got a superior award. .After that, a couple people hooked their iPods up to the auditorium's sound system and started an impromptu dance for about 2 hours. After I was basically dragged on stage, I started dancing and it was some of the most fun I've had...well, since homecoming. I danced with like half the people there, had a circle mosh pit stated me, got carried around a couple times (I'm rather small xD), and was basically a center of attention at the beginning, and I just felt like I was on top of the world. I don't think I've ever felt that confident about myself any time before, and i figured, what the hell, maybe I could try getting to dance with Stacey again. However, I tried about 3 times throughout the dance and she just kept denying me every time just to dance with her friends again as soon as I looked away. But by then, I didn't really care. There are other things to life xD.

 

In summary: this week she stopped all the IOIs and I'm done worrying about dating her. I can still eventually find someone else xD.

 

I'm [bleep]ing my life up so bad. I just need to vent, because lord knows no one's going to understand it. No one in my real life does. No one will here. If I were anyone but myself, I'd want to kill me. I hate this. My ex broke up with her boyfriend who she shouldn't have been with in the first place. I've been appointed to watching her for suicidal signs, meanwhile she's trying to seduce me into being in another relationahip with her. The problem is - it's working. Me and my girlfriend [current] have been having some fundamental issues lately. I can't see us lasting, but she's really the only thing keeping me from falling back into the arms of my old addiciton.

 

However, there's a new plot twist. It turns out my ex has been sleeping with this guy [who she only knew for like a month, which is when they started dating - only a WEEK after we broke up] like constantly. And I just found out today. Through a mutual friend that can't keep her mouth shut. And I friggin FLIPPED. Like FLIPPED. Like trashed me ex's basement flipped. Like trashed her backyard flipped. Like practically had a seizure flipped. I couldn't stop shaking and quivering and yelling for a good 5 hours. I was scaring everybody, including myself. Why? Because I'm an idiot that's in love with his ex. An ex that doesn't cease to digust him. And sicken him. And cheat on him. And just straight up do HORRIBLE things to.

 

I hate this. I want this to be over with. I don't know what I'm doing. I don't know what I'm thinking. I don't know what I'm feeling.

 

I am FREAKING OUT.

 

You're right. I don't understand. But I do really hope things start looking up for you. Just hang in there, it can't be this bad forever.

 

Anyway.

 

Today in my math class, my teacher mentioned that "a lot was going on this weekend" and asked if anyone was going to any of the sports games, the dance show, or had a date. I had a pretty lame weekend planned and was pretty much the only person who didn't raise my hand. I said jokingly "Eh, boring weekend for me" and out of the blue, the really hot boy next to me said "Not it's not...you're going to the movies with ME." And indeed I am, on Saturday. MLIA

 

I read that on MyLifeIsAverage today. Seems like a good way to ask someone out to me. Except maybe not the movies.

You consider each other a committed boyfriend/girlfriend when you haven't even kissed yet? :S

I dated someone for two months. We never kissed. We were more of a hugging couple. Remember, just because you enjoy kissing someone you met two hours ago doesn't mean the rest of us do. Not right, not wrong, just different.

You consider each other a committed boyfriend/girlfriend when you haven't even kissed yet? :S

I dated someone for two months. We never kissed. We were more of a hugging couple. Remember, just because you enjoy kissing someone you met two hours ago doesn't mean the rest of us do. Not right, not wrong, just different.

 

 

So you were essentially friends that hugged more than usual?

I wouldn't call that dating or a couple if all you do is hug each other, hell all my girls that are friends hug everyone.

You consider each other a committed boyfriend/girlfriend when you haven't even kissed yet? :S

I dated someone for two months. We never kissed. We were more of a hugging couple. Remember, just because you enjoy kissing someone you met two hours ago doesn't mean the rest of us do. Not right, not wrong, just different.

 

 

So you were essentially friends that hugged more than usual?

I wouldn't call that dating or a couple if all you do is hug each other, hell all my girls that are friends hug everyone.

Dating is not all about the physical stuff (kissing, sex..). Sure it plays a big, important part, but there is intimacy that is often found in relationships that is lacking in friendships. (whether or not flyingjj had this intimacy with his girlfriend, I don't know, as I know nothing about him or his relationship :P)

I say they're friends until they kiss. Then they're either together, or dating. I never understood the couples that never kissed or did anything more than hand holding. To me it just sounds like a friendship. But I guess I'm "closer" to my friends than most are.

I've seen it go either way. I've known people who say they're boyfriend and girlfriend for 3 months without doing more than hugging and holding hands, and I've known people who've had sex and don't call each other boyfriend and girlfriend.

 

Honestly, I'd only call someone my girlfriend after 1 or 2 dates, and some kissing. Simply because I hug, hold hands with, and do all that other stuff with my female friends quite often.

What's kissing anyway? Connecting lips with someone. Woo hoo. Big deal. Defining a relationship on it? Now that's just silly.

 

Yes, I hug those who are just my friends a lot, as did she. Our relationship was, as tripsis said, more than physical. Emotional intimacy is something I value much more than smacking my lips against someone else's.

 

I'm close to my friends, (Most of whom are female), but this was different, as I should know, being that I just said most of them are female.

I call those who I wish to be my girlfriend, my girlfriend. I wouldn't have secual relations with anyone I wasn't in a relationship with though. but I have no qualms with hooking up with a girl and not calling her my girlfriend. She'd just be someone I hook up with on occasion.

 

I'm [bleep]ing my life up so bad. I just need to vent, because lord knows no one's going to understand it. No one in my real life does. No one will here. If I were anyone but myself, I'd want to kill me. I hate this. My ex broke up with her boyfriend who she shouldn't have been with in the first place. I've been appointed to watching her for suicidal signs, meanwhile she's trying to seduce me into being in another relationahip with her. The problem is - it's working. Me and my girlfriend [current] have been having some fundamental issues lately. I can't see us lasting, but she's really the only thing keeping me from falling back into the arms of my old addiciton.

 

However, there's a new plot twist. It turns out my ex has been sleeping with this guy [who she only knew for like a month, which is when they started dating - only a WEEK after we broke up] like constantly. And I just found out today. Through a mutual friend that can't keep her mouth shut. And I friggin FLIPPED. Like FLIPPED. Like trashed me ex's basement flipped. Like trashed her backyard flipped. Like practically had a seizure flipped. I couldn't stop shaking and quivering and yelling for a good 5 hours. I was scaring everybody, including myself. Why? Because I'm an idiot that's in love with his ex. An ex that doesn't cease to digust him. And sicken him. And cheat on him. And just straight up do HORRIBLE things to.

 

I hate this. I want this to be over with. I don't know what I'm doing. I don't know what I'm thinking. I don't know what I'm feeling.

 

I am FREAKING OUT.

I know exactly what you're feeling. I never got to the point of doing anything physical, but I did say stuff I didn't actually mean and lost two of my best friends for at least a year. Trust me, I know it's confusing and frustrating as hell but just hang in there.

If you saw the other person kissing/holding hands someone else and it hurts you, and vice verse, it's a relationship, and both of you have to know this. There's commitment, emotion attachment, and sexual feelings. I don't think anyone can say they would be hurt if they saw their friend kissing someone other than themselves.

 

Now, I have a dilemma.

 

I have a friend. He has a girlfriend. Today, me and a bunch of our friends (All guys) were hanging out at one of our houses. His girlfriend wasn't there. After a while, a girl he knew came over. Pretty much the way he brought up this girl coming over was saying "I'm really finding it hard not to cheat on [Girlfriend]" and pretty much said how this girl was coming and wanted to do stuff, and how he wanted to do stuff as well (I'm almost certain that he just meant in general, not specifically with her). Well, she came over, and they ended up making out.

 

To be honest, this isn't exactly behavior I wouldn't expect from him. I'm actually kind of surprised this was his first time cheating on his girlfriend (I think they've been together for almost 6 months now). I think everyone of our usual group (The guys at least) does/will think "God dammit". Maybe one or two of our friends will react a bit more. I certainly don't like the idea of it. When he first told us, I gave him a bit of [cabbage] for it. Now I wish I gave him more. In fact, he got to the point where he sent a text to the girl saying they should just hang out some time later, but she just ignored it, even though she hadn't left yet.

 

Now I'm not sure what to do. I definitely don't think I'm going to tell his girlfriend, as much as I feel the need to do that, he's still my good friend. That said he can deal with the [cabbage] he gets from out friend (girl) who is pretty close to his girlfriend, when she finds out. I'm probably going to tell our two friends that will react a bit more, if it comes up. They won't tell his girlfriend, but will give him [cabbage]. At one point they printed a picture of him and his girlfriend and showed it to him every time he flirted with another girl (This was at the beginning of their relationship, and he is a flirt).

 

So my basicly problem is my friend did something wrong, and I feel a need to do something about it, but I also don't want to lose him as a friend, and I probably will if I tell the wrong people. That's pretty much the point of this post, to get it off my chest.

aquariusman, imo it wouldn't be your business unless you were close friends with his girlfriend. When you hit 18-19 you start realizing cheating happens fairly often. I remember reading an article a while back that said 3/4 women have admitted to cheating. It's probably higher for men.

 

As for when to call someone a girlfriend, here's my take. If I have sex on occasion with a friend, it's a [bleep] buddy. If I see that person more often and have intimate feelings for them, it's dating. It's not until I like her enough that I think it's really going somewhere that I would become exclusive and call her my girlfriend.

 

goddess I'm still pondering your pm

I didn't realize Goddess still lurked the thread. God I feel awful. A month ago I could hold my head up high and mighty and be proud. Now...not so much. I don't want to talk about it though, so I'm debating even posting my meaningless side commentary. Ugh.

 

Aquarius - Give your friend hell. Don't tell his girlfriend, but make him feel like a douchebag. If he's got some decency left in him, he'll do the right thing, but ultimately it's his call.