"I want a girlfriend/boyfriend", and other such relationship advice

[Kalphite]

I think this thread has lost the "Advice" part a long time ago. Only on very rare occasions do people actually want advice. This is more of a way for people to vent about relationships and discuss them. Well, more than people wanting advice anyway.

 

Hey, this isn't completely true. Like, maybe recently it has, but I used to come here for a lot of advice. I used to be quite terrible about getting myself friendzoned (hell, I saw some quote about it in somebody's signature once). While I admittedly still have not been in a relationship/done anything remotely sexual in the past yearish since I've stopped posting about every girl I meet here, I at least have made enough progress that I attract girls now; there have been about three since this schoolyear started but I didn't pursue any of them because of distance/age gap (I'm in college, they were all still in high school at my hometown and a long-distance relationship seems kind of pointless to me). Still, thats a definite improvement from where I was prior to this thread, and I definitely learned a lot about motivation and self-improvement from here. Advice from here has really helped me increase my confidence overall, and this drive for self-improvement led to me learning a lot more about fashion, starting to lift, and just trying to be more approachable and better at flirting in general.

 

So like, this thread's advice isn't completely useless. I'm sure there are other people like me here that it has helped; it just takes a long time to put some of this into motion. I'm sure I could have more success/things to talk about here if finding a girl was actually a priority for me currently, but it's taking a backseat to my self-improvement at this point and I am completely satisfied with that for the time being.

[Estonian dude]

I like to read about adventures of other people. Granted, there are boatloads more on the internet, but being on this forum makes it somewhat more personal, after having known the people for years.

 

That is in my signature, Kalphite ;)

 

And a new party coming up tomorrow. I should ask someone else to the prom. Seriously. Prom is next Friday and it would be kinda awkward if I went without a date.

[Estonian dude]

Contrary to you, at least checking from your sig, I have got time for stuff besides RS. Including girls.

Maybe you cannot understand it, but most, if not all of us are here for the community. I see this forum as a group of (anonymous) mates, that I can discuss all the troubles and share all the happinesses with. You cannot see this without being part of this community for years.

So please leave your invalid comments to yourself.

[Ginger_Warrior]

Actually, Noodle, feel free to post whatever comments you want.

 

I wouldn't accept criticism from a man who just used your RuneScape statistics to make all sorts of wild assumptions about your personal life and perceived lack of experience in relationships.

[constrictor]

Actually, Noodle, feel free to post whatever comments you want.

 

I wouldn't accept criticism from a man who just used your RuneScape statistics to make all sorts of wild assumptions about your personal life and perceived lack of experience in relationships.

 

Though, given, his name is, NoodlePubes.

He he.

 

But really, in relation to IRL, RS criticism = a kick to the nutters in a sword fight.

"Like really?"

[muggiwhplar]

Noodle's just trolling/spamming every thread he sees. Don't feed the troll.

[Ginger_Warrior]

It's an obvious troll but even so, a ridiculous criterion on which to judge someone.

[Estonian dude]

And that is how life is brought to a thread :)

 

That Facebook/Youtube time comment is valid, but I personally imagine time spent in FB as time spent at least somewhat socializing. Since I don't really use FB for much else than organizing events and chatting with other people. News Feed? Bleh, I check like 10 top stories maybe and then quit. And as far as I know, events and chatting with other people used to be helpful in getting to a relationship.

 

And as in being in a wrong place to get bf/gf, I'd say being at a computer at all is wrong place to get a bf/gf. But at least I have gotten lots of invaluable information and experiences, following even just a tiny bit of the advice given in this particular thread.

[Ginger_Warrior]

Facebook is amazingly useful when meeting new people, actually.

 

Add them.

Check out their likes/interests.

Avoid all the awkward small talk looking for common ground.

Success!

 

I'm sure muggi has better stats than I do for the success rates of online dating.

[Ishamael]

Facebook is amazingly useful when meeting new people, actually.

 

Add them.

Check out their likes/interests.

Avoid all the awkward small talk looking for common ground.

Success!

 

I'm sure muggi has better stats than I do for the success rates of online dating.

 

This. Almost every relationship that I've been in since like, 2010, has started on Facebook (meet in person, add her on Facebook, talk online and eventually set up an actual date). However, I'm noticing that this isn't really a good thing. The last two chicks that I dated ended up being total b****** that pretty much used me for my truck/money (*AHEM* RPG ;) ). This is because we mostly chatted on Facebook before actually really meeting in person. So I guess it has it's Pros and Cons.

 

*sigh*

 

I know you're right, but...I just haven't found the right line-crossing moment that makes me want to give up. She made me promise to never let her go. She practically quoted A Day To Remember at me. It's gonna take something more than logic to get me to stop.

 

I can accept this. You can't really help who you fall for, and once your heart is set on someone it's hard to change it's path . However, I need to ask you something. Before you met this girl, were you into drugs? Were you the the type of guy who drives his girl wherever she wants to go? Don't let her change you too much.

[The_Gabe]

I dont advice on my relationship because if something happens we just talk about it. No secrets in a relationship where neither person is experienced in awesome.

[TTanT]

^Sounds like my first relationship. Not to sound like a stick in the mud, but generally even "no secrets" relationships have plenty of half-truths and miscommunications. Especially if either member gets complacent and starts assuming their partner will always be upfront about uncomfortable topics.

 

Mind, your relationship could be an exception to that but I still advise caution and avoiding letting yourselves get too comfortable. That was what killed my first relationship.

[Omar]

Out of all the things I've learned ITT (and I've learned a fair amount, you'd hope after about 680 pages) none of it came from the advice I got (and in fact I haven't asked many questions), and all of it came from people like muggi, obfuscator, etc. weighing in. I don't think this thread is very useful for solving immediate problems, especially because people don't tend to take the advice, but it helps in the long run; it definitely changed my perspective on relationships, and probably for the better. Not nearly as much as forums dedicated to the topic might have, maybe, but would I even have looked at those hadn't this thread existed? In any case, I owe a big thank you to all the regulars--the crazy ones, the radicals and the more conservative alike--for the time they've put into it.

[Tim]

D-did I h-help at all?

 

(you know, on what NOT to be/do.)

[Giordano]

it definitely changed my perspective on relationships, and probably for the better.

Me too. I don't participate in these discussions, as I don't have anything from experience to say, but I do read them and pass them on to my friends. Several times when discussing to my friends I've stopped myself and thought "Wow, did I really just sound like Muggi just then?"

 

Muggi, you have really changed my views on relationships. But without people like y_guy obfuscator to participate in those discussions, it would of been one-sided and I would of ignored it. Both sides contrubuted to the discussion and I think it did more than what the posters thought it would.

[obfuscator]

Little do you know muggi and I are actually the opposite in real life, he's been happily monogamously married for 40 years, and I'm hugh hefner

[nine naked men]

i know you guys don't want to seem pretentious by namedropping me but just know that you're all welcome

[muggiwhplar]

[Tim]

With the aid of half a bottle of jameson whiskey, I ended up making out with a guy at the party I went to last night. Suffice to say he's cute and now it seems everyone is hell-bent on getting us two more intimate at the next party.

[Estonian dude]

That just happens. Girls in my class also get with anyone that wants them. Except speas.

And me.

I just see double and I have to look woth one eye and so I just I am alone tonight.

[Giordano]

That just happens. Girls in my class also get with anyone that wants them. Except speas.

And me.

I thought Estonians were cold people? That kissing an Estonian would suck the soul out of your body??

[Tim]

....What?

[Omar]

That just happens. Girls in my class also get with anyone that wants them. Except speas.

And me.

I just see double and I have to look woth one eye and so I just I am alone tonight.

Unless you're going to stop pretending things are outside of your control, please stop posting about yourself ITT. Also watch what I posted in the self-development thread.

[muggiwhplar]

With the aid of half a bottle of jameson whiskey, I ended up making out with a guy at the party I went to last night. Suffice to say he's cute and now it seems everyone is hell-bent on getting us two more intimate at the next party.

 

My immediate reaction was, "...was he hot???" but I saw that you answered that question sufficiently before I could reply. :thumbup:

[Omar]

Oh, yeah--high-five, Tim!