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"I want a girlfriend/boyfriend", and other such relationship advice


Da_Latios

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<---- still hopeless.

Me like girl. Girl old. 4 years older. Me afraid really embarrassed get. Don't know how to approach, no common meeting points.

t3aGt.png

 

So I've noticed this thread's regulars all follow similar trends.

 

RPG is constantly dealing with psycho exes.

Muggi reminds us of the joys of polygamy.

Saq is totally oblivious to how much chicks dig him.

I strike out every other week.

Kalphite wages a war against the friend zone.

Randox pretty much stays rational.

Etc, etc

 

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Met her for the first time on song festival 2 years ago. Only times I have seen her since have been either a few very rare choral practices or performances. She was in Australia whole last year aswell.

I really started to like her the first time I saw her, but that was so long time ago and I so rarely saw her. Every time I saw (or still see her) I think about her for days though. Now this year we both live in the same town. But I have only seen her once in the city, and twice in the choral practices in a different city. Those choral practices are at best 2 weeks apart.

We have also chatted a bit on Facebook over the years.

And she was one of the girls who asked if I have a date to the university year-end ball as soon as I attended the event.

And one another girl had asked me to go there with her before so I was taken...

Didn't even imagine ever having a shot with her, she seemed out of my league. Medical student, was Estonian champ in high jumping...

But when she asked me she told me she had noone to go to that ball, since there are so few decent men around here. Which is kinda true, a few years in and girls outnumber boys up to 3 to 1 in uni.

t3aGt.png

 

So I've noticed this thread's regulars all follow similar trends.

 

RPG is constantly dealing with psycho exes.

Muggi reminds us of the joys of polygamy.

Saq is totally oblivious to how much chicks dig him.

I strike out every other week.

Kalphite wages a war against the friend zone.

Randox pretty much stays rational.

Etc, etc

 

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I'm worried one of my friends might be in an abusive relationship. Recently her boyfriend got extremely upset over an obvious and pretty dumb joke I made (I called him a noob in RS, and accepted his invitation to fight me irl), and she had to text me and ask me to drop it because it was becoming really serious. I know that she knows I wasn't being serious, and I assumed he was smart enough to know I wasn't, but things have spiraled out of control with it, and it worries me.

 

The thing is, his last relationship was pretty bad for Ivan (the boyfriend), and when he came out of it, his ex turned into this incredibly psychotic ball of jealousy and rage towards Fox (my friend). It was an abusive relationship, at least emotionally, for Ivan, and it was bad. From everything I've heard (and it's been admittedly biased), Ivan was the abusee, not the abuser. But the thing is, I feel like I hear all the time about how people who are abused tend to become abusers when they get into a relationship they can control, because it's a power struggle they feel like they have to win.

 

So what if that's what's happening? What if Ivan is abusing red headed girl, physically or emotionally? I feel like I need to do something at least to make sure she's okay, but I don't know what. I'll see her in a couple weeks face to face, and I can talk to her about it then, but even if I do, I don't know what to say.

 

What should I do here? How do I talk to her about it? Should I even be worried?

My skin is finally getting soft
I'll scrub until the damn thing comes off

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Met her for the first time on song festival 2 years ago. Only times I have seen her since have been either a few very rare choral practices or performances. She was in Australia whole last year aswell.

I really started to like her the first time I saw her, but that was so long time ago and I so rarely saw her. Every time I saw (or still see her) I think about her for days though. Now this year we both live in the same town. But I have only seen her once in the city, and twice in the choral practices in a different city. Those choral practices are at best 2 weeks apart.

We have also chatted a bit on Facebook over the years.

And she was one of the girls who asked if I have a date to the university year-end ball as soon as I attended the event.

And one another girl had asked me to go there with her before so I was taken...

Didn't even imagine ever having a shot with her, she seemed out of my league. Medical student, was Estonian champ in high jumping...

But when she asked me she told me she had noone to go to that ball, since there are so few decent men around here. Which is kinda true, a few years in and girls outnumber boys up to 3 to 1 in uni.

Ehh.... i don't think you really like any of the girls you talk about. I think you're just young and horny. It's been a few times that you've mentioned liking a girl you met 2-3 years ago, only see her once every now and then, don't really talk to her, don't really know her, but you like her. I think you like the way she looks, or the idea of her. I think you're so obsessed with being with a girl that you think you like every girl you meet.

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I agree with Noxx. Yes you find these girls attractive Saq, but you don't seem to actually want to be with them. And that's perfectly alright. That's what short term relationships are all about, very common in youth. Eventually you'll meet a girl that really blows your mind. And it might not be because she's supee hot. Or super good at athletics. Or a really good singer. It'll happen as long as you keep yourself out there long enough to finally bump into her.

 

Tyler, you're right to be concerned, but its unfair to jump to such conclusions. Dont prod too hard into their relationship unless she's actually unhappy/trapped

Quote

 

Quote

Anyone who likes tacos is incapable of logic.

Anyone who likes logic is incapable of tacos.

 

PSA: SaqPrets is an Estonian Dude

Steam: NippleBeardTM

Origin: Brand_New_iPwn

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I agree with Noxx. Yes you find these girls attractive Saq, but you don't seem to actually want to be with them. And that's perfectly alright. That's what short term relationships are all about, very common in youth. Eventually you'll meet a girl that really blows your mind. And it might not be because she's supee hot. Or super good at athletics. Or a really good singer. It'll happen as long as you keep yourself out there long enough to finally bump into her.

 

Tyler, you're right to be concerned, but its unfair to jump to such conclusions. Dont prod too hard into their relationship unless she's actually unhappy/trapped

Quote

 

Quote

Anyone who likes tacos is incapable of logic.

Anyone who likes logic is incapable of tacos.

 

PSA: SaqPrets is an Estonian Dude

Steam: NippleBeardTM

Origin: Brand_New_iPwn

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Ty, what's making you believe that the girl is being abused, as opposed to this guy getting worked up over nothing?

 

I get it that he's agitated, but where's the link to her being potentially abused? Are there any other signs?

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I guess maybe it's more of a hunch than anything, now that I really think about it. That other post was a little heat of the moment. Thinking about it, he's gotten worked up over things like this in the past, so maybe this does fit into a pattern. The biggest worry was the fact that he got so agitated about it that she had to get ahold of me and tell me she was crying about it, which doesn't exactly sound good. But I think you're right in that there aren't a whole lot of other signs that I can see from my very 3rd party position.

My skin is finally getting soft
I'll scrub until the damn thing comes off

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Wow, never thought of it that way. Might be true.

I think I would like to be with her, but the thing is that I don't even know what it's like to be with someone.

Oh, and she ain't very pretty either. That's what made me wonder why I liked her in the first place.

t3aGt.png

 

So I've noticed this thread's regulars all follow similar trends.

 

RPG is constantly dealing with psycho exes.

Muggi reminds us of the joys of polygamy.

Saq is totally oblivious to how much chicks dig him.

I strike out every other week.

Kalphite wages a war against the friend zone.

Randox pretty much stays rational.

Etc, etc

 

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All you neeeded was one small kiss.

t3aGt.png

 

So I've noticed this thread's regulars all follow similar trends.

 

RPG is constantly dealing with psycho exes.

Muggi reminds us of the joys of polygamy.

Saq is totally oblivious to how much chicks dig him.

I strike out every other week.

Kalphite wages a war against the friend zone.

Randox pretty much stays rational.

Etc, etc

 

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Eh shy guy doesn't play kiss on first date. Doesnt take a guru to have seen that coming.

  • Like 1
Quote

 

Quote

Anyone who likes tacos is incapable of logic.

Anyone who likes logic is incapable of tacos.

 

PSA: SaqPrets is an Estonian Dude

Steam: NippleBeardTM

Origin: Brand_New_iPwn

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Why the heck did I post here aswell?

And no, you don't need one small kiss at the first date. Though it would be nice.

t3aGt.png

 

So I've noticed this thread's regulars all follow similar trends.

 

RPG is constantly dealing with psycho exes.

Muggi reminds us of the joys of polygamy.

Saq is totally oblivious to how much chicks dig him.

I strike out every other week.

Kalphite wages a war against the friend zone.

Randox pretty much stays rational.

Etc, etc

 

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Share on other sites

Ran into a girl who I used to flirt with constantly (and who used to flirt back despite having a longstanding relationship). She asked why I hadn't texted her for a while, and I told her straight up that I did, but she didn't respond, so I figured I'd just leave her alone since she obviously wasn't too set on talking to me. She made the excuse that she had lost her phone for a week. She then proceeded to tell me she would text me and that we needed to hang out.

 

Given her track record with bailing on me when I initiate hangout sessions, I just said okay and didn't get my hopes up at all.

 

It's been three weeks since then, and she hasn't texted me at all. Lmao. NOT EVEN BOTHERED. I just wanted to post here because I am quite satisfied at my ability to not get my hopes up. Next time I run into her and she says the line she's used on me the most ("We need to hang out!"), I'll shush her lips with my index finger, and then say in my most smartass tone, "Don't say it if you don't mean it!" and then prance off across campus all gay-like and shit.

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