Real life help & advice

[Saru Inc]

I was writing a book report and was wondering if this sounded like a good introduction:

 

The book Silent Spring by Rachel Carson contains an intoxicating amount of facts on how insecticides damage society. It was published by Houghton Mifflin on 27 September 1962 and helped establish the environmental movement. This nonfiction publication contains a lustful amount of information pertaining to the latter about the destructive forces of unregulated pesticide uses. The current regulations since the publication have improved, thanks to this book, are still becoming more strongly enforced. Learning the past is crucial; "Those that fail to learn from history, are doomed to repeat it," as Winston Churchill would say, and we must learn from past mistakes and never repeat them.

 

 

I've never written a book report in my entire life. So I have no idea what to say, except for the obligatory cool story bro.

 

 

 

Though I must say the last sentence appears awkward somehow, I can't pinpoint where...

[obfuscator]

Bump for serious help.

 

My mother and I are drifting apart. It's ruining my household. I realize hate is a strong word, so I won't use it but I can honestly say I feel no "love" for her. If she were to die, I don't think I'd be affected in the slightest, emotionally. I'm 17 years old, senior in high school. I realize this might just be a phase, but it's been going on for a few years now. She doesn't help either. We always have fights about the smallest things, and they turn into huge, emotional arguments that always end up with her in tears. She raised me as a single mother, after she divorced my abusive father when I was 2. She then remarried with my step dad when I was 8 I believe, and I now live with the two of them. They have 3 younger children together.

 

In 2006, she found her brother (my uncle) dead in his apartment. She hadn't heard from him for weeks (they usually talked every day), so she got very worried. She decided to drop by after going to get some groceries, and found him lying in his bed, probably there for days or more. Since this happened, she's never quite been the same. It's affected my whole family. She retreated to her home and became very over protective of everyone, especially me. Every time we argue about something, even now, it comes back to him.

 

Anyways, the argument that drove me to finally seek help, on tif of all places happened today. Today was the last day of school before our Christmas break. I decided I didn't want to go. I drove off like I normally would, then came back home after everyone had left. She made a surprising trip back home a couple hours later, and found me using the computer. After she found me, I quickly made up some story about the parking lot being empty, and me getting the date wrong. She didn't believe me. So she cut my cell phone line. I threw a huge fit, and left the house. 2 hours later I get back and she's still there (her lunch break is only supposed to be 1 hour.) I try and talk to her and convince her to reconnect the line, sticking with my story about how I simply made a mistake, and that it was unfair to punish me for "no reason." She refuses and we have another huge argument. She goes back to work. So I decide to leave the house and don't come back until late at night, around 12:30. I got 3 phone calls from her and from my step-dad but refuse to answer, and eventually turn off my phone, still heated about the argument.

 

When I get home, I find her standing alone in the dark house. Crying. I look at her, take off my shoes and go to my room, in silence. She calls me down, and I go. She tells me she's been standing there for 2 hours waiting for me to get home. I say "sorry" unemotionally and go back to my room. And now I'm here writing this.

 

If you read all that, thank you. Before you reply, I KNOW all of this could have been prevented if I had just gone to school, or if I didn't do this or that. I know. But this is bigger than that. We are drifting apart, and I feel like in a few months when I move out, I'll be happier than ever, and I will never see them again. I don't want this to happen, but at the same time I do. I despise the sight of my mother. I don't talk to her. I don't acknowledge her. If she asks me something, I grudgingly answer her questions and treat her like a pest. She's snoopy, overprotective and annoying.

 

I'm rude, disrespectful, and uncaring.

 

I don't really know what I'm looking for by posting this here, but it felt good to get that out. Any advice is welcome, because a relationship with my mother is something I don't want to lose, however little of it I have left.

 

She's obviously someone who's dealt with a lot so being overprotective is expected given the circumstances.

 

I'd go as far as to say (just a guess) that her sometimes overzealous behaviour towards you (such as cutting your cell phone line) may be an attention seeking move on her part since you basically just tend to ignore her.

 

The only advice I have for you now is to realize that she bugs you/does whatever else because she loves you, even if you don't reciprocate (or at least not as much). Make an effort to be civil and pay attention to her and you may find that helps.

[Omar]

You need to make the first steps. She's deeply affected and probably doesn't know what she's doing wrong, but you can see the situations from both sides. If you don't know it, she won't, because she's under lots of stress and doesn't even know how. The simple answer would be to suck it up up as much as possible.

[Dupin]

She's snoopy, overprotective and annoying.

 

I'm rude, disrespectful, and uncaring.

You can't be uncaring. You made the post because you cared. In the specific example, you overreacted, but it was understandable. Living with someone who cares about you and fears for you but doesn't know how to act appropriately can be very hard, but you are definitely doing it wrong. If you really want things to get better, you need to show her that you understand and be as accommodating as you can. When you feel comfortable talking to her again, sit down and have a talk about her. Let her know that what she is doing is hurting you. Be sure to let her know you understand why she's so controlling.

 

Of course, that's assuming the fault in communication is your own, and your refusal to communicate is harming your relationship. You understand that, for an overprotective person, trying to be independent without dealing with the problem is the worst thing you can do, right? You have to accommodate her fears as best you can, while making sure she understands that you need space. Communication is key here.

 

Additionally, I expect your and her actions are affecting the rest of the family as well. If you have a good relationship with any other family members, talk to them about your issues with your mother. It's especially important that you keep your stepfather in the loop.

 

It's easy to solve problems like these sitting at a keyboard. The real issues happen when you get up and realize you can't or don't want to help yourself, for whatever reason. You need to realize that right now, your problem is fairly simple. The fact that you have the option to walk away from her tells me that it hasn't spiraled out of control yet. The reins are entirely in your hands.

[RpgGamer]

a relationship with my mother is something I don't want to lose, however little of it I have left.

 

Well, that's certainly a step in the right direction. I myself don't get along very dandy with my parents, but not in the sense that they're over protective and what not. No, that ended a while ago. My parents were very up in my face about every little thing, forbidding me from this and that, judging me on my decisions, hating everything i liked, and generally just being very overprotective. Eventually, I started ignoring them. Now my relationship with my parents is a "can I borrow the car" to down the road "good night". I don't talk to them much is my point. This does however, leave any situation where I am with my parents for a prolonged period of time a tolerable one, because they're no longer up in my face about anything, leaving much less tension between us. You need to work out your differences with your mom and step dad, and back up a little bit. You need some space, and time away from them would be good. After your little break away from them, you can return and start off on a new foot. Greet them happily, and be polite. Of course it'll feel fake at first, but eventually you'll genuinely giving a crap about what they think, say and a feel.

 

Living with someone for a long time can have negative effects on a relationship, especially in a parent/child relationship where the child is yearning for freedom and independence. As you said, you're a senior and are likely moving out in 7 or 8 months. I think you can hold out til then, just chilling things out as much as possible in the mean time. After some time away from your parents, you'll find you miss them, and your mom will likewise miss you, too. My parents stopped being all "parenty" when I basically moved in with my girlfriend. I'd wake up, go to school, go to my girlfriends house, come home around 11, do some home work and sleep just to repeat. After about 2 years of that, my parents cut out all the bull crap, and while they still give me that judging look every now and then, the time away from them ended up helping our relationship, because where there was once intense well...tension, is now a nuetral tolerance, sometimes even an actual relationship occasionally. I feel once I myself move out completely, the rest of the healing process may kick in. But, I like living at home for financial reasons, so it's on the back burner for me.

 

Your mom's been through alot. Cut her a bit of slack. try to get away from home for a while. Sleep over a buddies house for a weekend. Just get away from the tension for a bit, and come back to a level headed environment. If you truly mean it when you say you want a healthy relationship with your mother, you'll make it happen. And certainly, she'd like to reconnect with her first born child.

[Dupin]

Sleep over a buddies house for a weekend.

 

I disagree, actually. You're right that they both need space, and moving out will be good for healing, but for someone as overprotective as she, leaving like that could cause a lot of problems. She needs to be prepared and accepting of any sort of move towards independence. College is exactly the sort of thing that would work, but just disappearing for a bit, even if you tell her beforehand, will make her worry more rather than less. Her worry is, obviously, that if she lets you be independent something may happen to you like the way things happened to your uncle, and you need to assure her it won't, even if you aren't entirely sure yourself.

[IGoddessI]

I don't normally step by here so here we go! Be prepared to stand in your mother's shoes.

 

You give birth to two beautiful baby boys. Your husband bashes you and you grow the strength to leave him. You are now doubtful of all male role models and their tendencies. Your main priogritive in life is to protect your children.

 

She found her brother dead in a basement after telling him everything about herself. His death is now linked to her emotional vulnerability.

 

What do you get from these two paragraphs? You have a very emotional mother who is scared of losing the people she cares about most in this world. She is now afraid to show her caring and vulnerable side.

 

Do you want to despise your mother? Or do you want to live in peace and understand her?

 

Your mission (if you choose to accept it) is to show that she will not be punished for showing her appreciation, affection and love. And to give it time :)

 

xxoo

 

 

 

Bump for serious help.

 

My mother and I are drifting apart. It's ruining my household. I realize hate is a strong word, so I won't use it but I can honestly say I feel no "love" for her. If she were to die, I don't think I'd be affected in the slightest, emotionally. I'm 17 years old, senior in high school. I realize this might just be a phase, but it's been going on for a few years now. She doesn't help either. We always have fights about the smallest things, and they turn into huge, emotional arguments that always end up with her in tears. She raised me as a single mother, after she divorced my abusive father when I was 2. She then remarried with my step dad when I was 8 I believe, and I now live with the two of them. They have 3 younger children together.

 

In 2006, she found her brother (my uncle) dead in his apartment. She hadn't heard from him for weeks (they usually talked every day), so she got very worried. She decided to drop by after going to get some groceries, and found him lying in his bed, probably there for days or more. Since this happened, she's never quite been the same. It's affected my whole family. She retreated to her home and became very over protective of everyone, especially me. Every time we argue about something, even now, it comes back to him.

 

Anyways, the argument that drove me to finally seek help, on tif of all places happened today. Today was the last day of school before our Christmas break. I decided I didn't want to go. I drove off like I normally would, then came back home after everyone had left. She made a surprising trip back home a couple hours later, and found me using the computer. After she found me, I quickly made up some story about the parking lot being empty, and me getting the date wrong. She didn't believe me. So she cut my cell phone line. I threw a huge fit, and left the house. 2 hours later I get back and she's still there (her lunch break is only supposed to be 1 hour.) I try and talk to her and convince her to reconnect the line, sticking with my story about how I simply made a mistake, and that it was unfair to punish me for "no reason." She refuses and we have another huge argument. She goes back to work. So I decide to leave the house and don't come back until late at night, around 12:30. I got 3 phone calls from her and from my step-dad but refuse to answer, and eventually turn off my phone, still heated about the argument.

 

When I get home, I find her standing alone in the dark house. Crying. I look at her, take off my shoes and go to my room, in silence. She calls me down, and I go. She tells me she's been standing there for 2 hours waiting for me to get home. I say "sorry" unemotionally and go back to my room. And now I'm here writing this.

 

If you read all that, thank you. Before you reply, I KNOW all of this could have been prevented if I had just gone to school, or if I didn't do this or that. I know. But this is bigger than that. We are drifting apart, and I feel like in a few months when I move out, I'll be happier than ever, and I will never see them again. I don't want this to happen, but at the same time I do. I despise the sight of my mother. I don't talk to her. I don't acknowledge her. If she asks me something, I grudgingly answer her questions and treat her like a pest. She's snoopy, overprotective and annoying.

 

I'm rude, disrespectful, and uncaring.

 

I don't really know what I'm looking for by posting this here, but it felt good to get that out. Any advice is welcome, because a relationship with my mother is something I don't want to lose, however little of it I have left.

[Omar]

God-tier post, no pun intended.

[Zealot]

I don't normally step by here so here we go! Be prepared to stand in your mother's shoes.

 

You give birth to two beautiful baby boys. Your husband bashes you and you grow the strength to leave him. You are now doubtful of all male role models and their tendencies. Your main priogritive in life is to protect your children.

 

She found her brother dead in a basement after telling him everything about herself. His death is now linked to her emotional vulnerability.

 

What do you get from these two paragraphs? You have a very emotional mother who is scared of losing the people she cares about most in this world. She is now afraid to show her caring and vulnerable side.

 

Do you want to despise your mother? Or do you want to live in peace and understand her?

 

Your mission (if you choose to accept it) is to show that she will not be punished for showing her appreciation, affection and love. And to give it time :)

 

xxoo

 

 

 

Bump for serious help.

 

My mother and I are drifting apart. It's ruining my household. I realize hate is a strong word, so I won't use it but I can honestly say I feel no "love" for her. If she were to die, I don't think I'd be affected in the slightest, emotionally. I'm 17 years old, senior in high school. I realize this might just be a phase, but it's been going on for a few years now. She doesn't help either. We always have fights about the smallest things, and they turn into huge, emotional arguments that always end up with her in tears. She raised me as a single mother, after she divorced my abusive father when I was 2. She then remarried with my step dad when I was 8 I believe, and I now live with the two of them. They have 3 younger children together.

 

In 2006, she found her brother (my uncle) dead in his apartment. She hadn't heard from him for weeks (they usually talked every day), so she got very worried. She decided to drop by after going to get some groceries, and found him lying in his bed, probably there for days or more. Since this happened, she's never quite been the same. It's affected my whole family. She retreated to her home and became very over protective of everyone, especially me. Every time we argue about something, even now, it comes back to him.

 

Anyways, the argument that drove me to finally seek help, on tif of all places happened today. Today was the last day of school before our Christmas break. I decided I didn't want to go. I drove off like I normally would, then came back home after everyone had left. She made a surprising trip back home a couple hours later, and found me using the computer. After she found me, I quickly made up some story about the parking lot being empty, and me getting the date wrong. She didn't believe me. So she cut my cell phone line. I threw a huge fit, and left the house. 2 hours later I get back and she's still there (her lunch break is only supposed to be 1 hour.) I try and talk to her and convince her to reconnect the line, sticking with my story about how I simply made a mistake, and that it was unfair to punish me for "no reason." She refuses and we have another huge argument. She goes back to work. So I decide to leave the house and don't come back until late at night, around 12:30. I got 3 phone calls from her and from my step-dad but refuse to answer, and eventually turn off my phone, still heated about the argument.

 

When I get home, I find her standing alone in the dark house. Crying. I look at her, take off my shoes and go to my room, in silence. She calls me down, and I go. She tells me she's been standing there for 2 hours waiting for me to get home. I say "sorry" unemotionally and go back to my room. And now I'm here writing this.

 

If you read all that, thank you. Before you reply, I KNOW all of this could have been prevented if I had just gone to school, or if I didn't do this or that. I know. But this is bigger than that. We are drifting apart, and I feel like in a few months when I move out, I'll be happier than ever, and I will never see them again. I don't want this to happen, but at the same time I do. I despise the sight of my mother. I don't talk to her. I don't acknowledge her. If she asks me something, I grudgingly answer her questions and treat her like a pest. She's snoopy, overprotective and annoying.

 

I'm rude, disrespectful, and uncaring.

 

I don't really know what I'm looking for by posting this here, but it felt good to get that out. Any advice is welcome, because a relationship with my mother is something I don't want to lose, however little of it I have left.

All that Goddess has said seems correct. I want to add something which is (hopefully) useful. I know how hard it is to do, but you really need to step back and really recognize that you are not the only person in the world. That is the only possible cure. Your mother is hurting. Clearly. She probably always will retain that ache, and you will probably never fully understand why she has it (though some day you will have the same sorts of aches and will understand how much they hurt, truth of the matter is that you probably have some inkling if you really examine your motives in wanting to save this relationship). You can not change that your mother is in pain, but you don't have to add to her pain. I hate to say this next part because I feel like a real jerk, but you are causing her a lot of unnecessary pain right now. You are abusing your mother's trust, as well as her emotions.

 

People make a huge mistake frequently when they look at the relationship between hatred and abuse. Most people assume that the hatred (whatever causes it) leads to the abuse. The truth is actually precisely the opposite. When you misstreat people, and you will because you are as selfish as everybody else, it causes you to feel uncomfortable because part of you empathises and wouldn't like to be in their shoes. To cope you dehumanize those you misstreat. Eventually they become nothing more than a man-skinned demon to you, everything they do appears somehow aimed at causing you grief. And consiquentially you feel more and more justified in treating them more and more terribly, and the cycle builds on itself. Unless the cycle is broken, in the end you will find yourself alone, hating everybody and everything, including yourself. The only way to break this cycle is to take a step back and see the person as a person again. Then act on what you see. You probably don't want to hear this, but you are the only one who can mend the way you feel about your mother. To do so you have to take a step back, forgive her for every time she has wronged you, real or imagined, and actively look for what she has done to express love to you. This will probably be the most difficult thing you ever attempt. The analogy that comes to mind is teaching blind eyes to see again. But as somebody who has been there I can assure you it can be done. One of the best things which you can do to move the process along is to actively look for ways to demonstrate love to your mother (that is to say demonstrate that you wish the best for your mother). I'm not the one to tell you exactly what that entails. I don't really know you, only a few facts about you, and I likewise don't know your mother. You should probably ask your step-father for that guidance. If there is an expert on your mother, he's it. And he probably knows you pretty well also. When you approach him you must be serious enough that he becomes willing to talk about it, humble enough to listen to what he has to say, and meek enough to not try and defend yourself or your actions. Doubtless, he will have a list of things which you do which you probably need to stop doing lest they exacerbate the situation further (We all keep such lists, whether we mean to or not, about everybody we know). Once you have a starting point, start! For a while you will have to fake it, but eventually if you persist, the feelings will follow. Relationships have a remarkable way of mending themselves if we will only recognize and act on the humanity of those we relate to.

[Lemeja]

Thanks so much for the advice. My winter break is just wrapping up, and I did actually go to a close friend's house for a few days, specifically because I wanted a break. I read your posts over there and thought about your comments. I think guilt might be the best cure. I can only guess that it will take time like Goddess said. Since I got back, things are a little better. We've at least forgotten about the huge fight that made me post here in the first place. Of course, it will take action on my part too. I've really taken your comments to heart guys, thanks.

[Wizz]

I can't attach a microsoft word file to my hotmail email address. Halp?! It says "Insert: [paperclip] Attachment" but when I put the cursor over it and click, nothing happens.

 

EDIT: I tried it in Internet Explorer and it worked >_>

umm disable any addons that might intefere like NoScript?

[Omar]

You should probably get another email. Hotmail really sucks, I switched to it because I thought you needed it for MSN. And GMail being really nice and all they automatically forward all emails you get on your old email to your new one. Not so with Hotmail. [bleep]s.

[Zealot]

Thanks so much for the advice. My winter break is just wrapping up, and I did actually go to a close friend's house for a few days, specifically because I wanted a break. I read your posts over there and thought about your comments. I think guilt might be the best cure. I can only guess that it will take time like Goddess said. Since I got back, things are a little better. We've at least forgotten about the huge fight that made me post here in the first place. Of course, it will take action on my part too. I've really taken your comments to heart guys, thanks.

 

I hope things work out for you. :)

[Dupin]

Will changing my VGA cable to an HDMI one improve my computer's graphics performance?

[RpgGamer]

Is there a car that doesn't suck[and won't start sucking within the next few years] under $7,000?

 

It'll probably be between the years of 2000 and 2007, but that's much preferred anyway. Cheaper the better. Infact, I'd like it to be closer to $6,000 if at all possible. I'm thinking Toyota, but I don't really know. I just want something that isn't going to need a lot of maintenance. Good mileage also makes me happy. Sedans are preferred. I'm sure there's a site somewhere that could probably help me out, but all the ones I tried were rather "eh". So...suggest me some cars please?

[obfuscator]

Will changing my VGA cable to an HDMI one improve my computer's graphics performance?

Probably not.

[Zealot]

Is there a car that doesn't suck[and won't start sucking within the next few years] under $7,000?

 

It'll probably be between the years of 2000 and 2007, but that's much preferred anyway. Cheaper the better. Infact, I'd like it to be closer to $6,000 if at all possible. I'm thinking Toyota, but I don't really know. I just want something that isn't going to need a lot of maintenance. Good mileage also makes me happy. Sedans are preferred. I'm sure there's a site somewhere that could probably help me out, but all the ones I tried were rather "eh". So...suggest me some cars please?

Find yourself a motivated private seller. Estate sales for recently deceased old women tend to be good because cars from them tend to be well mantained, low milage, and you aren't paying the dealer's markup. Just make sure to have a mechanic go over the car and make sure it is really in good working order. You won't have a warrantee after all.

[Omar]

Does anyone have any knowledge in law, especially in the privacy invasion sector? I'd rather ask this over PM.

[Qrup]

I usually post under another name. There is no need to welcome me.

 

I am very depressed. I have had a very bad relationship with everyone in my family for the last few years. I do not want them in my life and they do not want me in theirs. I do not have any friends. I have great difficulty communicating with people. This has caused me to be unable to do certain things that I should be able to do. I do not want to go to any kind of therapist. Even if I did (I do not. Please do not suggest this.) I would not be able to. You can assume I live in the middle of nowhere. I absolutely hate leaving the place where I live. I live with my parents. They have agreed to let me live here until I finish high school. I do not have any plans after high school due to my lack of communication skills. I CAN NOT talk to other people. This may be difficult for some of you to understand. Please take my word for it and do not suggest it. I have thought about killing myself in the past. For the time being, I do not need to worry about food, shelter, internet access, etc. Again, this may be hard for some of you to understand, but there are more things in life than financial well-being. I do not need to hear stories about how my life could be worse if I grew up in the ghetto. Right now there is no reason for me to keep living. There is also no reason for me to kill myself. When I become homeless, I know that I will probably starve to death. I believe that is when I am going to kill myself.

 

I am asking for ways to cope with the situation by myself. Please do not suggest that I just "grow a pair" and get over it. If you were thinking of saying that, please do not respond to this post. I would like a reason to keep living once I am homeless. I am not in debt to anybody. I can not think of a reason not to kill myself. From what I have read in various places, most people suddenly get happy once they reach their mid-20s. I do not know if this is true, but I would like to try to wait it out and see if the spontaneous non-depression happens to me. I do not have anybody to "fall back on". Please do not suggest that either. Please do not suggest a hobby. I have tried that in the past and that only made it worse.

[Pinkbullet3]

Well for a starter, what are some things you enjoy?

[Skull]

Try talking to your doctor, real depression is a legitimate health issue caused by chemical imbalances or some [cabbage] like that. He (or she) might be able to give you some medication to potentially help you out. Don't turn to suicide though, I don't see anyway it could be better than living.

 

And I know you said not to suggest a hobby, but really I find I'm the least unhappy when I'm doing something. It doesn't have to involve other people, by try to find something to do even if it's like reading or something like that. Find something you're good at and practice it. Find something you're bad at, get better. Self improvement can't hurt, even if it doesn't help.

 

Most of all, hang in there. Feel free to send me a PM if you want to talk to someone or just let out some frustration or your thoughts. I'm sorry I can't really help more, I for the most part got past my "depression" by age 15 or 16 (I might have just been a whiny [bleep] though I don't really remember).

[Zierro]

From what I have read in various places, most people suddenly get happy once they reach their mid-20s. I do not know if this is true, but I would like to try to wait it out and see if the spontaneous non-depression happens to me.

 

I've noticed an increase in comfort in my own skin and living in the world as I age. Not that I've really gotten any 'happier', but I have learned to value the opportunity of life more. Things don't seem as dark and hostile as they did during my teenage years. But they don't seem as shiny and welcoming like when I was a child. Right now I like who I am and I like what life is. I have no desire to get rid of them, regardless of how miserable I am most of the time.

 

By the way, what's wrong with your communication skills? It sounds like you want to have relationships but don't think you have what it takes.

[Guest Rob]

Is it just in person you can't talk to people easily? If that's the case, do what you're doing right now, and talk to people on the internet. Find people you can open up to, and trust, even if you don't know them anywhere but the internet. That will be a start - just having someone in your life. IF you can talk to someone online, of course. But, it seems you can.

 

Feel free to Pm me if you want me to do that for you, of course.

 

From there, I suggest working your way up, slowly. Can you talk to people at all face-to-face? And, that includes just being able to do something like order at a restaurant. Just any form of communication face-to-face.

[RpgGamer]

I usually post under another name. There is no need to welcome me.

 

I am very depressed. I have had a very bad relationship with everyone in my family for the last few years. I do not want them in my life and they do not want me in theirs. I do not have any friends. I have great difficulty communicating with people. This has caused me to be unable to do certain things that I should be able to do. I do not want to go to any kind of therapist. Even if I did (I do not. Please do not suggest this.) I would not be able to. You can assume I live in the middle of nowhere. I absolutely hate leaving the place where I live. I live with my parents. They have agreed to let me live here until I finish high school. I do not have any plans after high school due to my lack of communication skills. I CAN NOT talk to other people. This may be difficult for some of you to understand. Please take my word for it and do not suggest it. I have thought about killing myself in the past. For the time being, I do not need to worry about food, shelter, internet access, etc. Again, this may be hard for some of you to understand, but there are more things in life than financial well-being. I do not need to hear stories about how my life could be worse if I grew up in the ghetto. Right now there is no reason for me to keep living. There is also no reason for me to kill myself. When I become homeless, I know that I will probably starve to death. I believe that is when I am going to kill myself.

 

I am asking for ways to cope with the situation by myself. Please do not suggest that I just "grow a pair" and get over it. If you were thinking of saying that, please do not respond to this post. I would like a reason to keep living once I am homeless. I am not in debt to anybody. I can not think of a reason not to kill myself. From what I have read in various places, most people suddenly get happy once they reach their mid-20s. I do not know if this is true, but I would like to try to wait it out and see if the spontaneous non-depression happens to me. I do not have anybody to "fall back on". Please do not suggest that either. Please do not suggest a hobby. I have tried that in the past and that only made it worse.

 

Let me summarize your post:

I'm unhappy, how do I become happy without changing anything?

I hate my family, but I love living with them and never leaving their side.

I want help, but don't you dare suggest anything to me, because it's wrong.

 

 

Sounds like you need to re-evaluate what you really want in life.

[Guest Rob]

Can you repost, and give us an idea of how well you can talk to people? This would include:

 

Over the internet

Over the phone

Being able to order a meal at a restaurant

Asking a stranger on the street for directions

 

Can you do all/any of those fine?

 

And, can you give us a better idea of why you detest your family so much, also?