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Pick Up Lines


matrix2613

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M: 'Your eyes are like spanners...'

 

F: 'WHAT?!'

 

M: 'Every time I gaze into them my nuts tighten'

 

 

 

My friend used that one, I don't know if it worked to be honest :P

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"I notice you don't have a penis. Would you like to borrow mine?"

 

^ The silliest I could come up with.

 

 

 

"Would you like to make snow angles?"

 

^ (It's not a metaphor, it's to be used when you find yourself in a snowy area) Some girl in my class made that up, and she guaranteed that it worked when she tried it. I explained to her that girls don't need pickuplines. Any approach is interpreted as "This is my uterus. Please come inside!". (From Coupling)

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*Insert Criminal/Intelligence agency* is hunting my penis, do you have somewhere I can hide it?

 

 

 

If someone puts you in a sack it's because I asked for you for Christmas

 

 

 

and one that's guaranteed NOT to work:

 

You're dad must be a thief, 'cause I'm sure that's my car you arrived in

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Lets be kind and post a list of those that do NOT work,at all.

 

 

 

Lets put the sex back in sexually transmitted disease.

 

And that chloroform one that has appeared 4-5 times.

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Amen, brother :lol:

Amen, brudda (referring to the 10th commandment)

amen Bruder! (german ftw)

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That's impossible.

 

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"Your word for today is legs, now lets go back to mine so we can spread the word".

 

 

 

The most successful chatup line is a high percentage alcoholic drink, I've never once seen a chatup line properly work :lol:

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I'd like to kiss you passionately on the lips, then move up to your belly button.

 

 

 

(Use index finger to call someone over then say) I made you come with one finger, imagine what I could do with the rest.

 

 

 

Would you be my love buffet? So I can lay you out on the table and take what I want?

 

 

 

As long as you need a place to sit, you'll always have my face.

 

 

 

 

 

You are what you eat, and tonight I want to be you.

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I'd like to kiss you passionately on the lips, then move up to your belly button.

 

 

 

(Use index finger to call someone over then say) I made you come with one finger, imagine what I could do with the rest.

 

 

 

Would you be my love buffet? So I can lay you out on the table and take what I want?

 

 

 

As long as you need a place to sit, you'll always have my face.

 

 

 

 

 

You are what you eat, and tonight I want to be you.

 

 

 

Those are actually humerus, all I know is the dumb ones.

 

 

 

Are those astronaut pants? Because your [wagon] is outta this world.

 

I lost my number can I have yours?

 

Do you have a mirror in your pants? "No why?" Because I can see myself in them.

 

Does this rag smell like chloroform to you?

 

Are your legs tired, because you've been running through my mind all day long.

 

Are you lost? Because heaven's a long way from here.

 

 

 

etc.

 

Getting bored of typing them haha.

 

 

 

Edit: Let me just say, none of these helped me get my current girlfriend, or any previous ones for that matter.

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Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else.

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I'd like to kiss you passionately on the lips, then move up to your belly button.

 

 

 

(Use index finger to call someone over then say) I made you come with one finger, imagine what I could do with the rest.

 

 

 

Would you be my love buffet? So I can lay you out on the table and take what I want?

 

 

 

As long as you need a place to sit, you'll always have my face.

 

 

 

 

 

You are what you eat, and tonight I want to be you.

 

 

 

I liked the first one, not only was if funny but it caught me off guard. The rest just got repetitive.

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I lost my virginity, can I have yours?

 

 

 

 

 

Epic, but borderline...

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"That seat looks a bit soft, do you want something harder to sit on?"

 

 

 

-.-

 

 

 

That one's actually pretty good.

I was going to eat hot dogs for dinner tonight. I think I will settle for cereal.

 

OPEN WIDE HERE COMES THE HELICOPTER.

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From a girl to a guy : "Is that a gun or are you just happy to see me"?

 

 

 

[hide=A little inappropriate][removed][/hide]

 

:mrgreen: :D :mrgreen:

 

 

 

 

 

I can see this thread being closed soonish.

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