So I want to know, are you less likely to engage in a casual conversation, or impress yourself upon someone of the same or opposite sex, if you find that person unattractive? Do you open up less to someone whose eyes are too close together, or someone with a fat [wagon]?

 

I ask this completely aside from how that person presents themselves. This is strictly upon the few few seconds of acknowledging someone's existence.

 

Does that person have a higher threshold to break through, in order to become your friend or friendly acquaintance? Does their personality have to somehow make up for their physical deficiency? (Women who have a sociopathic need to have an 'ugly friend' notwithstanding)

 

 

Be honest here, noone is going to judge you...

i don't think like that, but i know a lot of people who do.

I won't avoid unattractive girls (unattractive in my eyes, of course) or ignore them, but I'm not going to go out of my way for them either. Then again, I treat all people like that.

Quite the opposite really. I'm not hesitant to approach 'unattractive' people because I generally regard myself as unattractive also. In fact I have more problems talking to attractive people. Attractive people have to prove to me that they're not a stuck up popular [wagon] before I deem them safe to talk to. I generally equate Attractiveness = Popularity and Popularity = Hatred of me.

 

You're going to get a lot of people saying they don't when they really do just because they don't want to look bad.

I'm actually pretty comfortable talking to any sorts of people - being in the Customer Service business, 99% of my day is spent dealing with people I've never met before.

 

This has somewhat carried over into my real life, due in part to something that Rach (kinda sorta) touched on. I think if you consider yourself to be an underdog, you're much more willing to talk to people that others may avoid.

I don't avoid talking to unatractive people, I tend to take people as they come - if people try to be pleasant to me I'll reciprocate. However, if somebody is a pain I'll not try to make an effort to get on with them. Looks only matter when you're looking for something more than friendship for me anyway.

 

I wouldn't know if I did it subconsciously because it would be well...subconscious.

No, because that'd be hypocritical of me.

Quite the opposite really. I'm not hesitant to approach 'unattractive' people because I generally regard myself as unattractive also. In fact I have more problems talking to attractive people. Attractive people have to prove to me that they're not a stuck up popular [wagon] before I deem them safe to talk to. I generally equate Attractiveness = Popularity and Popularity = Hatred of me.

 

You're going to get a lot of people saying they don't when they really do just because they don't want to look bad.

 

I lol'd.

 

I'm a pretty shy person, but I'll talk/respond to people.

 

However, if someone has extremely poor personal hygiene, I'll find myself not talking to them as well, it just makes them seem unappealing as a person.

 

I won't judge people based on looks or popularity (Racheya), but I do judge on their personal hygiene, however, when I say extremely poor, I mean the "unbearable to the point it makes you nearly physically ill to be near them" poor. Though, I noriced something about the so called "popular" kids, all of them aren't extremely attractive, hell, they can look pretty average, but they tend to be able to make people laugh more.

 

Racheya, your problem with these people is you're judging them on looks alone, and won't talk to them. Hell, I wasn't the best looking guy in High School, yet people would talk to me, I just failed to respond that well/often, plus the way I appeared made me seem unapproachable. Maybe you have a similar problem, that and they have to "prove" themself before you judge them "worthy" (you're a real stuck up [bleep] in that respect) will mean that people will see you as the unapproachable loner type who hates practically everyone.

Quite the opposite really. I'm not hesitant to approach 'unattractive' people because I generally regard myself as unattractive also. In fact I have more problems talking to attractive people. Attractive people have to prove to me that they're not a stuck up popular [wagon] before I deem them safe to talk to. I generally equate Attractiveness = Popularity and Popularity = Hatred of me.

 

You're going to get a lot of people saying they don't when they really do just because they don't want to look bad.

 

I lol'd.

I agree. You're just as bad as anyone who judges someone because they are "unattractive".

Well I won't go out actively pursuing her obviously, but if you have to talk to her you have to talk with her.

What I've noticed about myself when I join a new group of people is I start off quiet, gauge the people around me and then after I while the joker in me floods out, making jokes and trying to get a laugh out of everyone.

Right now the course I'm has 12 students including me going from 18 to 52 and I try to find the funny side of everyone, like one of the ladies she's quite passed the large side, but damn she has the most hilarious stories ever, the best one she told was that her 70 year old neighbour actually stole her fence.

 

I think I only judge people that are entirely rude in the first few minutes I've met them, because I personally don't see why I should waste time on someone doesn't take time to be polite.

As a Cashier I just tend to avoid old people, they always have a story to talk about >.<

I don't judge on looks, but i'm sure if you compared the total amount of time I talk to hot girls and ugly girls at every party I attended you'd notice I talk to hot women much more.

I don't judge on looks, but i'm sure if you compared the total amount of time I talk to hot girls and ugly girls at every party I attended you'd notice I talk to hot women much more.

 

That'd be true for anyone. As humans, if someone is more physically pleasing to your eye, of course you are going to talk to them more, rather than those who don't attract you in any way. You might not mean it, it's just a subconscious action.

In my experience, attractive = popular = stuck up [wagon] until proven otherwise.

 

There have been a few exceptions. Popularity does not ALWAYS = stuck up [wagon]. Attractive does not ALWAYS = popular. This is a rare though, since everyone here seems to have learned everything they know from 80's high school sitcoms.

if that person wants to talk to me, sure why not? my door's open to anybody. :)

Quite the opposite really. I'm not hesitant to approach 'unattractive' people because I generally regard myself as unattractive also. In fact I have more problems talking to attractive people. Attractive people have to prove to me that they're not a stuck up popular [wagon] before I deem them safe to talk to. I generally equate Attractiveness = Popularity and Popularity = Hatred of me.

 

You're going to get a lot of people saying they don't when they really do just because they don't want to look bad.

 

I lol'd.

 

I'm a pretty shy person, but I'll talk/respond to people.

 

However, if someone has extremely poor personal hygiene, I'll find myself not talking to them as well, it just makes them seem unappealing as a person.

 

I won't judge people based on looks or popularity (Racheya), but I do judge on their personal hygiene, however, when I say extremely poor, I mean the "unbearable to the point it makes you nearly physically ill to be near them" poor. Though, I noriced something about the so called "popular" kids, all of them aren't extremely attractive, hell, they can look pretty average, but they tend to be able to make people laugh more.

 

Racheya, your problem with these people is you're judging them on looks alone, and won't talk to them. Hell, I wasn't the best looking guy in High School, yet people would talk to me, I just failed to respond that well/often, plus the way I appeared made me seem unapproachable. Maybe you have a similar problem, that and they have to "prove" themself before you judge them "worthy" (you're a real stuck up [bleep] in that respect) will mean that people will see you as the unapproachable loner type who hates practically everyone.

Please don't lecture me on giving these people a chance when I've spent my entire school life being bullied. You don't know how many times I've had to deal with them pretending to be nice to me just so they can do something 'amusing' and take the mick out of me. I'm not stupid enough to think EVERYONE is like that in the entire world, but everyone in my immediate region IS that sort of person. The attractive girls that sit at the back doing their hair for an hour going 'OH MY GOOOOOOD why are you such a weirdo?' Even worse are the lads that go 'HEY RACHAEL, WANNA GO OUT WITH MY MATE? C'MOOON HE FANCIES YOOOOU.'

 

I'm not rude or nasty to any of them, in fact I like it when the odd person asks me a genuine question or says something to me. But I've had enough [cabbage] in my life already and I can't wait to be rid of them when I leave Sixth Form. I don't mean literally PROVE themselves but yeah, if I see a guy wearing popular clothes and hanging around with a bunch of people I'm going to assume that if I walk too close to them I'll get some sort of remark my way. Sorry about having a [cabbage] school life. <_<

Yeah? You were bullied? Here's a [bleep]ing fact for you. So was I. I was [bleep]ing bullied for no [bleep]ing reason and I've got part of a tooth missing that proves it.

 

You think you've got it so [bleep]ing hard? So do other people. My sister is one of those types that take an hour to do their hair. Guess what? She wasn't exactly the most popular. Hell, despite that I'm her brother, I'd say she's a pretty good person.

 

Know why they'd enquire why you're a "weirdo", it's because you probably look it, hell, in a way, maybe the way you act makes them think that.

 

God, I feel like I'm trying to talk to the female version of abc, here's the basics you need to know, and probably improve on: Clothing style, body language, hygiene (which all equate to physical appearance, body language comes under mental attitude too) and your attitude. The basics for improvement (won't go into clothing and hygiene here) are walk with your back straight, arms by your side, swiinging slightly, look ahead, don't rush, look people in the eyes, and don't give short responses, don't make them too long either.

I admit I don't talk to many people I find unattractive. But I made the concious decision to start not doing that a while ago, and it seems I've made some pretty cool new friends. But that's just for guys. I still have trouble making my self talk to girls who I'm not attracted to.

The only time I avoid talking to someone is if I feel intimidated or just lazy. Most of the time I have no problem talking to people regardless of how they look.

I approach all males the same way. When it comes to females, I approach and speak to girls a lot more positively and have more fun when their good looking. :P

Quite the opposite really. I'm not hesitant to approach 'unattractive' people because I generally regard myself as unattractive also. In fact I have more problems talking to attractive people. Attractive people have to prove to me that they're not a stuck up popular [wagon] before I deem them safe to talk to. I generally equate Attractiveness = Popularity and Popularity = Hatred of me.

 

You're going to get a lot of people saying they don't when they really do just because they don't want to look bad.

 

Hmmm, I'm not going to lie, I consider myself an attractive person. But I don't feel offended by the comment about being stuck up.

But I guarantee if I said that all unattractive people are weirdo's I'd get jumped on here and I'd look like the bad guy. I talk to anyone really, don't really judge someone if they are good looking or not. If anything talking to the unattractive people is easier because I don't feel like I have to 'show off' so to speak.

But to answer the original question with honesty, if there was a group of good looking girls and a group of ugly ones, I'd go talk to the better looking ones.

Okay guys, cool it down a bit. No need to argue over who had the worst school life.

 

--

 

I don't avoid talking to unattractive people. Actually, I don't avoid talking to anyone. I'm not terribly social, (and by that, I mean I prefer to be on my own and I find myself at a loss for something to say in groups of more than four people) but I'm not going to avoid talking to someone because I deem them to be "unattractive." In fact, that's a really shallow way of thinking. You could be passing up an opportunity to meet a great person just because they're fat, have acne, or any other things that you deem make a person "unattractive." I won't say I've never judged a book by its cover, but it's always fairer to judge after you've read it.

All right, while I understand that this is a sensitive subject, I strongly advise you not to turn this into a "who was bullied more" pissing contest. Just stick with the topic at hand.

 

-Necromagus, Tip.It Mod.

It's much easier to talk to girls I'm not attracted to, which are typically the ones I'm friends with. When I'm attracted to someone it is pretty freaking obvious by how socially [developmentally delayed]ed I act around them. And by "attracted" I don't just mean any good looking girl, but someone I'm truly attracted to. I have no problem talking to hot girls that I'm not interested in.

So basically no and yes.