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Noobs say the funniest things!


xXAbyssalXx

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Goes like this:

 

 

 

Noob1:lets kill the goblin army (in port sarim)

 

 

 

Noob2:Ok

 

 

 

Mememe513(me):I am recording your movements for something

 

 

 

Noob1:ok

 

 

 

Noob1 to Goblin:die! I win! Death to the goblins! Hi yaa

 

 

 

Noob2: fight troops, fight! die fool!

 

 

 

Me:thank you for your consent

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This is happening right now

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Noob1= lv 26 Male

 

 

 

Noob2= Lv 4 female

 

 

 

Me= my new guy :twisted:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Noob1- I like naughty girls

 

 

 

Noob2- Hehe

 

 

 

Noob1- I'm finguring u (His spelling not mine)

 

 

 

Noob2- Oh oh oh

 

 

 

Noob1- Now i'm doing u in the but

 

 

 

Noob2- Oh ya

 

 

 

Noob1- Are you happy with me?

 

 

 

Noob2- Ya

 

 

 

Me walking by- get a room

 

 

 

Noob1- shut up noob

 

 

 

Me in pm to noob2- you know this guy?

 

 

 

Noob2 in pm- no but he seems nice

 

 

 

Noob1- looks like you lost your **********

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

:wall: Dam online pedophiles.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

-------------------------------------------

 

 

 

whoops another one

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

noob- get ride of jagex (yes he did say ride)

 

 

 

noob- get ride of jagex

 

 

 

noob- get ride of jagex

 

 

 

noob- get ride of jagex

 

 

 

noob- get ride of jagex

 

 

 

me- without jagex there would be no runescape

 

 

 

noob- good

 

 

 

noob- get ride of jagex

 

 

 

noob- get ride of jagex

 

 

 

noob- get ride of jagex

 

 

 

me- if you hate jagex so much then why are you playing?

 

 

 

noob- I gonna hack all membrs and cancl their memberships u assssssss!

 

 

 

random guy- ???

 

 

 

me- wow

 

 

 

noob- get ride of jagex

 

 

 

*noob logs*

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I hate idiots

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don't know if someone said this

 

 

 

But it's funny! :lol:

 

 

 

Scene: me fly fishing near lumby

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Noob lvl24:wanna be my gf?

 

 

 

In my head:lol, im a boy^^

 

 

 

me:#1 you're lvl24

 

 

 

Me:#2 im a boy

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Guess who got a bigger surprise, me or him?

 

 

 

You be judge :anxious:

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Ok I got 1, I was sorta being mean I admit that, but what he said was worse.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

When I was chopping yews in Varrok.

 

 

 

Me: Hi there

 

 

 

Me: Whats going on?

 

 

 

Me: Be carefull in the wildy!

 

 

 

I was saying hi and being nice to people who walked by.

 

 

 

Me: Hi there lvl 6, what's up.

 

 

 

Noob: Hi!

 

 

 

He stands there for a minute

 

 

 

Me: Can I help you?

 

 

 

Noob: I need money...

 

 

 

Me: Okay?

 

 

 

Noob: Can you give me some money?

 

 

 

Me: Nope

 

 

 

Noob: Can you give me anything?

 

 

 

Me: Yup

 

 

 

After thirty seconds of nothing

 

 

 

Noob: Well...

 

 

 

Me: Advice, I can give you advice, and my number one advice is never beg.

 

 

 

After two minutes of nothing

 

 

 

Noob: **** You, You jack***, I hate you!

 

 

 

Noob: I'm gonna report you! I'm New! and you pull off this **** on me, well ****you

 

 

 

Me:Do you at least want to know my advice befor I report you?

 

 

 

After the Noob swears non stop I report him.

 

 

 

Me: Reported!

 

 

 

Me: You messed up buddy, I suggest you stop now and learn from this...

 

 

 

He stops and for a few minutes he didn't talk

 

 

 

Noob: Dude, I'm sorry, Please don't report me. I got hacked and I lost everything in the wildy. Please man...

 

 

 

Me: Sorry... you shoulda stop while you were ahead.

 

 

 

Noob: **** You!

 

 

 

And he runs away, probably thinking he can get away from being reported. While the whole time, I get one log from the whole experience. <.<

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Man why do noobs always follows you and say "I'm Poor." OMG we don't care leave us alone noobs!

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This is something i see a lot:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

noob: do ur skill cape emote (always somting along those lines)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

The weird thing is im lvl 78 cb and i never even saw a skill cape emote :anxious:

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Well

 

 

 

i wouldnt sell my Blue Mask for 1k So This guy followed me around for 30minutes while i chopped Trees to make into shafts. he didnt say anything but i was really surprised someone would waste 30minutes of there gaming time in defiance. lol

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I've been reading my way through i've only gotten to page 9 buti got one

 

 

 

I was woodcutting in seers when out of the blue i get a pm...

 

 

 

Messenger889:This is Jagex Informing you that your account is about to be banned for item scamming

 

 

 

(aside from the fact i never scammed items its been over 6 hours since my last trade)

 

 

 

I add him he was on a totally different world from me to...anyways

 

 

 

me:Jagex doesn't pm people they send messages to inbox anyways

 

 

 

Him: Well you have 30 min to (i forgot exactly what he said here but it amounted to trading all my items to a secondary account )

 

 

 

Me: you know trading between accounts is against the rules

 

 

 

Him: not if you do it through a friend on a dif world

 

 

 

Me: I'd Like to let you know i reported you several moments ago

 

 

 

Him:yeah what for?

 

 

 

Me: breaking rule 5(i think its rule 5 but i did tell him the right rule if its not)

 

 

 

Him: oh you got guts threatening staff

 

 

 

Me: well if you really work for them then you should have no troubles

 

 

 

Messenger889 logs out

whatcolor_isblack.jpg

I sometimes like to ask people if they think they are sane....just to see if they are that crazy

this was actually written on a kitchen knife - WARNING: KEEP OUT OF CHILDREN.

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Just remembered another i was taking my monthly break in the free world And i decided to go down to the lowest level of The stronghold of security and sit there in egg form(Don't question why) and here are a few snippets of conversation

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

person 1:Wow an egg

 

 

 

me: wow a person

 

 

 

person 1: how you become an egg?

 

 

 

me: easter ring

 

 

 

person 1: will any ring work i'll go get my gold ring

 

 

 

person 1 runs off

 

 

 

persons 2-3 enter room

 

 

 

Person 2: your an egg

 

 

 

me: and you're a human

 

 

 

Person 3: how did you become an egg

 

 

 

me: its the new playable race the mighty egg people strong mages they are

 

 

 

Person 2:really how do you become one?

 

 

 

Person 1 returns:my ring wont work what do i do

 

 

 

Person 3(smarter than most people):lol no really though how do you become an egg

 

 

 

me: if you do not already know you never can

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Then most recently the jester costume seemed to bring them out of the woodwork with over 500 people asking me how i got my armor, joker, my full, jestre, or some variation on that. 2 conversations i will share with you:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

person: buy your full

 

 

 

...

 

 

 

...

 

 

 

Person: drak seed buy your full

 

 

 

me: my name is one word for one thing

 

 

 

person:omg drakseed buy your full

 

 

 

me:you are also spelling it wrong

 

 

 

Person: god i woulda given you 500k

 

 

 

me: also it is untradeable

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

person:dark

 

 

 

person:dark

 

 

 

person:dark

 

 

 

person:dark

 

 

 

me:what?

 

 

 

person:whered you get your armor from

 

 

 

me:your the 500th person to ask me that

 

 

 

me:why don't you figure it out

 

 

 

me:this is new and

 

 

 

me: there was an update today

 

 

 

me:what got updated to day?

 

 

 

person:umm fremmy?

 

 

 

Me:so you can find out more about my outfit where?

 

 

 

person:omg jus tell me already

 

 

 

me:....

whatcolor_isblack.jpg

I sometimes like to ask people if they think they are sane....just to see if they are that crazy

this was actually written on a kitchen knife - WARNING: KEEP OUT OF CHILDREN.

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Well i was doing some farming while wearing my fletching cape.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Then this lvl 90 guy comes up and says: Omg another fletch cape.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I just kept on farming then he said: Everyone has them!!!!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

so i just replied with a simple: Do you?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

And he didn't say anything and soon ran off

nabsigmar2011.png

[spoiler=My 99s (7)]9,638th to 99 Fletching ~ 29th January 2007

737th to 99 Hunter ~ 2nd July 2007

910th to 99 Agility ~ 28th January 2008

59,467th to 99 Defence ~ 23rd December 2009

92,762nd to 99 Hitpoints ~ 26th June 2010

102,704th to 99 Attack ~ 29th June 2010

144,091st to 99 Strength ~ 29th June 2010

 

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i was on runescape one day just training when i got a message from this guy tellin me to give bak 12mill that i scammed off him i was surprised when he sed that as i have never had 500k let alone 12 mill as i spend it fast anyhow he says that i scammed him with some ther guy about 30 minutes later his friend pms me and says y did i take etc they sed if i did not give to them they wuld report me in 1 week and i literally sed go onn 3 weeks later and i am still playing runescape

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Ok, just saw this happening...

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

There's a lvl 102 player walking around, showing everyone his wealth (13m). He's wearing full Veracs and an obby cape. Someone steps up to him and asks if he doesn't have a fire cape. The answer: "I have 3 you noob".

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

PS. For those of you that don't know, you can only have 1 fire cape.

Skill N' Chill - The Hawt Fun Sexy and Cool Skilling Clan!

Skill n' chill website: http://skillandchill.freeforums.org/index.php - Clanchat: Skill N C - IRC Chat: #skillnchill

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I lost my members a couple of weeks ago, so I was stuck wearing d med, mystic body, whip, and sara cape (otherthings not worth noting).

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

So, i was in lumbrigde, and a level 3 comes to me and says:

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

3: gimme stuff

 

 

 

me: why should I?

 

 

 

3: coz i have a level 374 account.

 

 

 

(at this point i am having a quiet chuckle.)

 

 

 

me: you cant have a level 374 account.

 

 

 

3: yes I can. Im jetix.

 

 

 

(notice he spells the flippin name wrong. :lol: )

 

 

 

(I do laugh emote)

 

 

 

me: you arent jagex.

 

 

 

3: Its not jagex! It jetix! and I am.

 

 

 

me: no, seroiusly, its jagex. and you are not them.

 

 

 

3: am too.

 

 

 

me: your not

 

 

 

3; yes I am.

 

 

 

me: if you were, u would have a gold crown.

 

 

 

3: shut up you noob.

 

 

 

me:lol

 

 

 

3: stop it!

 

 

 

me:lolololololol

 

 

 

3: stop it or die!

 

 

 

me: lololololololololololololololololol

 

 

 

3; die then!

 

 

 

(attempts to attack me.)

 

 

 

3: why cant i hit you?

 

 

 

me: your not allowed

 

 

 

3:fine then. wind strike!

 

 

 

(nothing happens, of course)

 

 

 

me: lol. U noob.

 

 

 

3: gimme stuff now, or I report you!

 

 

 

me: Ull have a hard time, since ive reported you for impersonating jagex.

 

 

 

3: NOOB!

 

 

 

(logs out at this point.)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I just had to tell that story.

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I'm a member and I went on a free world to give my cousin some arrows.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

My Cousin:Thanks,Jess =)

 

 

 

Me:Welcome,Brendan =)

 

 

 

Noob:brndon,ur mi friend rember?I have you that 300k!I need it bk n0w...

 

 

 

My Cousin:lol..noob. Well Jess I'm ganna go train range now..

 

 

 

Me:K,bye.

 

 

 

Noob:jezz,im ur friend rember?I have you all that armur ur wearing and dat viking hat.

 

 

 

Me:This is "viking hat" is members only.I highly doubt you gave it to me.

 

 

 

Noob:Rember! i wuz a mem b4

 

 

 

Me:Ok. What is this helmet called?

 

 

 

Noob:Viking hat! Duhh!!!

 

 

 

The "viking hat" was a zerker helm

 

 

 

Me:.....

 

 

 

Noob:So r u gonna gimme dat blue shirt or what?

 

 

 

the "blue shirt" was a rune platebody.

 

 

 

Me:...

 

 

 

Noob:Reported!!!!111!!!

 

 

 

Me:For what?

 

 

 

Noob:Being a noob. im reportin u for bein a total item skammin noob!

 

 

 

Me:If only it were possible to be reported for being a noob...

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Maybe we shouldn't have said our real first names. :-k

7,436th to 99 fishing on July 13, 2008

 

[hide=Quotes that I lol'd at]

the day the fantastic four come into runescape, i will eat my socks.

what kind of topic is this. ihaven't read it yet

but i now it must be stupid.

[/hide]
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ok mind you that this is a lvl 94

 

 

 

me:(sitting in edge bank minding my business)

 

 

 

noob: hey u want the all u have to do is show me whr the monastary is (offered guthix kite for me to show him)

 

 

 

me:...... no u lurer

 

 

 

noob: please i just got 31 prayer and i dont know whr monastary is

 

 

 

me: ohhh ok well its just over the hill to the west

 

 

 

noob: but i need to follow you

 

 

 

me:(put all my stuff in bank) ok right this way

 

 

 

noob:runs away

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

its the worse lure ive ever encountered

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I'm in the cow fields on my new, lov-leveled alt, a while ago. Killing cows and selling their hides is the best combat exp + money for low levels. So anyway, this cow walks by and I attack it. A level 12 (note, this alt is level 20some, and with mithril) with iron comes up: "

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Noob: Hater.

 

 

 

Me: ?

 

 

 

Me: Me?

 

 

 

Noob: Yes you

 

 

 

Me: What?

 

 

 

Noob: You heard me

 

 

 

(pause, while I try to figure out wtf he's talking about.0

 

 

 

Me: Ok, why?

 

 

 

Noob: You stole my cow.

 

 

 

(I'm part laughing, part shocked at the stupidity, of this guy trying to appear tough right now.)

 

 

 

Me: Oh noes its an evil cow thief! Run for your nooby lives everyone!!! zomgrofl!!!1111!!!!111!shiftone!1

 

 

 

Me: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH oh my poor nooby soul, my cow's been taken AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHH

 

 

 

Noob runs off and logs out.

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