I think I've found my dream girl. She plays Pokemon, and isn't ashamed to admit it, she has a sense of humor, and she looks pretty nice.

 

And on an extremely related note:

 

I was answering one of those questions that facebook will give you about your friends yesterday (yeah, whoopdy do, let me finish). And one of the questions was "where would you kiss x, if you had to kiss her somewhere?" I replied "on the hand," and remarked that anywhere else would get me slapped.

 

Is it correct to assume that if she answers "I probably wouldn't slap you if you kissed me somewhere else," as a good sign? Or is it a sign of her not being very violent?

I think I've found my dream girl. She plays Pokemon, and isn't ashamed to admit it, she has a sense of humor, and she looks pretty nice.

 

And on an extremely related note:

 

I was answering one of those questions that facebook will give you about your friends yesterday (yeah, whoopdy do, let me finish). And one of the questions was "where would you kiss x, if you had to kiss her somewhere?" I replied "on the hand," and remarked that anywhere else would get me slapped.

 

Is it correct to assume that if she answers "I probably wouldn't slap you if you kissed me somewhere else," as a good sign? Or is it a sign of her not being very violent?

 

It's a good sign :smile: :smile: :smile: :smile:

I think I've found my dream girl. She plays Pokemon, and isn't ashamed to admit it, she has a sense of humor, and she looks pretty nice.

 

And on an extremely related note:

 

I was answering one of those questions that facebook will give you about your friends yesterday (yeah, whoopdy do, let me finish). And one of the questions was "where would you kiss x, if you had to kiss her somewhere?" I replied "on the hand," and remarked that anywhere else would get me slapped.

 

Is it correct to assume that if she answers "I probably wouldn't slap you if you kissed me somewhere else," as a good sign? Or is it a sign of her not being very violent?

 

It's a good sign :smile: :smile: :smile: :smile:

In my eyes, that's an excellent sign. Good luck with what you're up to, buddy. :thumbup:

I think I've found my dream girl. She plays Pokemon, and isn't ashamed to admit it, she has a sense of humor, and she looks pretty nice.

 

And on an extremely related note:

 

I was answering one of those questions that facebook will give you about your friends yesterday (yeah, whoopdy do, let me finish). And one of the questions was "where would you kiss x, if you had to kiss her somewhere?" I replied "on the hand," and remarked that anywhere else would get me slapped.

 

Is it correct to assume that if she answers "I probably wouldn't slap you if you kissed me somewhere else," as a good sign? Or is it a sign of her not being very violent?

 

 

Um. Yes. That'd be a clear indicator that if you were to kiss her, you would not get slapped. You should now plot a way to make this happen, and kiss her. And not get slapped. Have fun

 

Oh, and sorry for the heeby-jeebies Reb. I am weak, I didn't mean to imply that all males are.

Well, I don't think I'm going to go straight for a kiss, judging that I'm ratehr inexperienced in this field. But I do believe I will set the cogs in motions....

 

That sounded a lot slower than I intended....

I think I've found my dream girl. She plays Pokemon, and isn't ashamed to admit it, she has a sense of humor, and she looks pretty nice.

 

And on an extremely related note:

 

I was answering one of those questions that facebook will give you about your friends yesterday (yeah, whoopdy do, let me finish). And one of the questions was "where would you kiss x, if you had to kiss her somewhere?" I replied "on the hand," and remarked that anywhere else would get me slapped.

 

Is it correct to assume that if she answers "I probably wouldn't slap you if you kissed me somewhere else," as a good sign? Or is it a sign of her not being very violent?

 

It's a good sign :smile: :smile: :smile: :smile:

For some reason I have a urge it isn't...

 

But don't ask me! I'm nobody. :ugeek:

Well, I don't think I'm going to go straight for a kiss, judging that I'm ratehr inexperienced in this field. But I do believe I will set the cogs in motions....

 

That sounded a lot slower than I intended....

 

 

I used to think like that. Then I realized how fast the world around me moves. Get crackin' buddy.

WHY is it people call dating a game. THERE'S NO FREAKING SECOND CHANCE/ 1-UP MUSHROOM!

 

 

With that said,

Okay so the fallout with my friend didnt go too bad. still friends but she now swears an oath not to date a guy for a year now that shes done it all. (thanks for rubbing it in)

 

Now there's my other friend. She says she cant ever find the right guy, that Im a nice person, anyone who says no to me is an idoit for not realising what i am like yatta yatta. Im a little lost on weather she likes me, her natural flirtatious charm or just complaining alot (like I do).

With all those fine [wagon], I mean faces, at Tafe I think I better read The Game again to brush up a bit.

 

WHY is it people call dating a game. THERE'S NO FREAKING SECOND CHANCE/ 1-UP MUSHROOM!

 

 

With that said,

Okay so the fallout with my friend didnt go too bad. still friends but she now swears an oath not to date a guy for a year now that shes done it all. (thanks for rubbing it in)

 

Now there's my other friend. She says she cant ever find the right guy, that Im a nice person, anyone who says no to me is an idoit for not realising what i am like yatta yatta. Im a little lost on weather she likes me, her natural flirtatious charm or just complaining alot (like I do).

She could just be trying to cheer you up. It's what friends do.

I don't know who to give specific advice too, but in general for the situations in trying to get a girlfriend/boyfriend:

 

1- Be confident in yourself. If you're not confident about going and talking to her/him or anything then you can't go far as to get her/him to be your girlfriend/boyfriend. Confidence towards somebody also stands out immediately from the others; I mean, would you firstly notice somebody who is spontaneous or outgoing..or would you notice somebody who woudln't make eye contact, speak up or have a good attitude? :^_^:

 

2- Be comfortable and friendly with them. well, a girlfriend/boyfriend is a friend after all, and good friends last, you help each other and look out for each other, so don't think of yourself being stuck in the "friend zone" if you feel that type of situation, as usually being friendly and complimentative is a high confidence point that would stand out from others. Just try to keep it all flowing smoothly and don't be afraid to be the flirt! :lol:

 

3- Don't be afraid to take them aside. A few of my friends have found this a problem, sometimes the girl/guy is surrounded by other friends. You can either go up and hang with them, make up some conversation and put in your input so the person knows you're not afriad of their friends. If your'e the quiter,shy type like myself, just try to add some crap into the group conversation; you'd get a good laugh and the friends may think you're wierd but hey, when has being wierd stopped anything? Also, you can try to take them aside and talk with them yourself, or ask to go to ___ and see if they want to come with you.

 

4- DON'T BE A CREEP! Don't try to be the clingy as hell type, it scares off girls/guys a good lot of the time so as I've said before, be a friend to them, but don't be afraid to get flirty :wink:

 

5- Never feel like you aren't doing enough. Sometimes you can feel like if you try to go after somebody; they don't know it but believe me; they would know it and don't worry cause there's the chance that also like you, so just keep doing what you can for it. :-)

There's a girl at school. I have absolutely no idea who she is and only see her at lunch, which is about 30 minutes of the day. I know nothing about her (name, age), but I really want to meet her. At least find out what grade she's in. Any ideas...

Found this, thought you guys might find it interesting.

 

[hide]The Ten Reasons Why HIGHLY INTELLIGENT Men Fail With Women... AND WHAT TO DO ABOUT IT...

 

I've been teaching men how to become more successful with women and dating for a several years now... and one "problem scenario" just keeps coming up OVER AND OVER... and OVER

and OVER and OVER again...

 

...and it's really amazes me.

 

I'm going to refer to it as "The Genius Failure Paradox".

 

"The Genius Failure Paradox" is the tendency for UNUSUALLY intelligent men to have very LOW levels of success with women and dating.

 

After contemplating this particular paradox, discussing it, and working on it for an awesome amount of time, I'd like to share my thoughts about it with you.

 

I assume that if you've read this far, then you see probably yourself as smarter than the average guy.

 

You know that you're a little different than other guys.

 

You probably realized at a young age that you saw things differently, and thought differently than others in school...

 

And you've probably realized that your smart mind gives you an advantage over others in many areas of life...

 

Your smart mind gives you a particular type of advantage that can be very, very powerful in life: YOU'RE USUALLY RIGHT.

 

Smart people get used to being "right", because they usually ARE right.

 

And when you're RIGHT more often than others, you can get ahead in many situations.

 

But unfortunately, this smart mind of yours can actually be WORSE than USELESS when it comes to a key area of life:

 

WOMEN AND DATING.

 

By the way, I did say WORSE than useless.

 

It can actually be like having a hammer when you need to tighten a bolt. If you use the tool you have for the job, you'll most likely make the situation WORSE.

 

Of course, it's hard for a smart guy to even IMAGINE a situation where his smart mind could HURT his chances for success...

 

But trust me, this is one of those situations.

 

So relax, open your smart mind, and let me share with you the ten reasons why smart guys fail with women... and what to do about it.

 

 

REASON #1: THEY'RE WRONG, BUT THEY CAN'T OR WON'T SEE IT OR ADMIT IT

 

I mentioned that smart guys are used to being RIGHT in most situations.

 

And what do most smart guys do when they come across a situation where they're WRONG?

 

They find a new situation... one that fits their strength. They know they'll be right next time, so they just walk away... knowing that it won't be long before they're right again.

 

(OR they let the "problem situation" destroy them... more on that later.)

 

Well, the [bleep] about being wrong when it comes to women and dating is THERE'S NOWHERE TO RUN AND HIDE.

 

There's no quick "I'm right" around the next corner to make you feel better.

 

It only takes "failing" with a few women in a row for a smart guy to see the pattern... and realize that something isn't working.

 

Solution? Think harder.

 

A smart guy just assumes that his logic must be good... so he just keeps thinking harder.

 

But when no success comes, it really starts

to become mentally difficult.

 

Accepting that you're wrong is a VERY hard thing for a "smart guy".

 

Accepting that you're not only wrong, but you have NO CLUE WHERE TO EVEN START is even more difficult.

 

Ultimately, many smart guys come up with the following logical conclusion:

 

I AM A SMART GUY, THEREFORE IF I CAN'T FIGURE OUT HOW TO BE SUCCESSFUL WITH WOMEN AND DATING, THEN THE PROBLEM MUST NOT BE SOLVABLE OR WORTH SOLVING.

 

Try that on for a self-defeating idea.

 

 

REASON #2: THEY'RE BLIND AND ARROGANT

 

In short, many smart guys refuse to accept that a good, solid, workable answer could come from someone "dumber" than them, so they discount any idea that comes from an "obviously less intelligent person" before trying it.

 

Let me ask you a question:

 

If you were going to be walking across Africa on foot, would you rather have your guide be the guy on this planet with the highest I.Q., or a caveman who lived a million years ago that had an I.Q. of about 50... but who grew up being chased by lions and all kinds of animals that wanted to eat him all his life?

 

It's an interesting question.

 

Now, hopefully you'd like to have the guide who isn't the smartest guy around... but who has escaped from many, many dangerous situations with deadly animals...

 

But now let me ask you:

 

If you'd like to learn how to be more successful with women and dating, would you take advice from a guy who isn't very intelligent, but who knows how to attract women?

 

There's something about being smart that makes some guys unwilling to accept input, ideas, or instruction from anyone who isn't either as smart or smarter than them.

 

Well, any SMART GUY can see the folly in this particular approach... once it's examined closely.

 

If you've been making this mistake, then you need to STOP IT. Stop being an arrogant bastard, and open your eyes.

 

Look around.

 

Learn from some "dumb" guys... and let them teach you how to get what you REALLY want.

 

 

REASON #3: POOR SOCIAL SKILLS

 

It BLOWS MY MIND how many smart guys I meet that just don't GET IT when it comes to basic social skills.

 

It's as if they have logically reasoned that social skills are for lower beings who need to play games... and not worth the time it would take to learn them.

 

In fact, I believe that there are a lot of

smart guys running around this planet who don't

even have "social skills" and "be a cool guy that people like" in their "MENTAL MODEL" of what it could possibly take to be successful with women and dating.

 

Social skills are just that... SKILLS.

 

They're not social INFORMATION.

 

They're not social THEORIES.

 

They're social SKILLS.

 

And you don't get them by THINKING about them. You get them by GETTING them.

 

Excellent social skills are the foundation for good communication with other humans... and if you don't have good social skills, you dramatically lower your chances for success with women.

 

 

REASON #4: THEY PSYCH THEMSELVES OUT

 

Smart guys do something that fascinates the hell out of me...

 

They come up with all the reasons why everything WON'T WORK when it comes to women and dating.

 

They actually figure out why what they would like to do will probably fail...

 

They use their amazing creative imaginations to imagine all kinds of horrible pictures and scenes... and then they use those imaginary outcomes to create negative emotions... which ultimately stop them from having success with women and dating.

 

THEY DON'T EVEN TRY.

 

Now, if you've thought something through and come up with a good reason why it would fail, it makes sense to not do it, right?

 

I mean, why would you want to do things that are going to fail?

 

It's sound logic, but HORRIBLE thinking when it comes to the REAL WORLD... and success with women.

 

Because smart guys don't UNDERSTAND women, and they don't UNDERSTAND what it takes to be successful with women, they are working with bad figures. They're wrong before they even start figuring!

 

Using your mind to come up with all the reasons why things won't work in this area of your life leads to ULTIMATE FAILURE.

 

You must learn to overcome this habit if you have it.

 

 

REASON #5: THEY SEEK ONLY "INFORMATIONAL SOLUTIONS"

 

What does a smart guy do when he runs into a problem... or he needs to figure something out?

 

He looks for INFORMATION to help him solve the problem.

 

MORE INFORMATION is always the answer.

 

Information is the friend of a smart guy.

 

Got a strange virus on your computer? Just hop on the internet and search for how to eliminate it.

 

Don't know how to change the alternator on your car? No prob. Just buy the manual and turn to page 147.

 

Don't know the definition of a word? Open up your dictionary.

 

MORE INFORMATION solves the problem.

 

So what do smart guys do when it comes to overcoming a problem with women?

 

They want MORE INFORMATION.

 

They think the answer lies in learning just ONE MORE TECHNIQUE... or one more magic concept.

 

Well what if there were a situation in life where the "get more information" strategy actually made things WORSE?

 

How would you even know that it was making things worse?

 

Now, I don't want to suggest that learning more about how to be successful with women is a bad thing. It's not.

 

But if you have a problem that is EMOTIONAL or PHYSICAL in nature, then reading five million theories on it probably isn't going to help you very much.

 

You need to get out in the real world and try some stuff!

 

You need to look at the REAL problem... the ROOT of the problem.

 

When it comes to women and dating, there's a very good chance that you have MORE than enough "information".

 

Smart guys often use "more information" to distract them from TAKING ACTION.

 

I've heard this referred to as "Creative Avoidance".

 

Nod silently if you've ever figured out a creative way to avoid facing something in your life.

 

Good, thank you.

 

 

REASON #6: THEY FOCUS ON LOGIC INSTEAD OF EMOTION

 

NEWS JUST IN: Women don't feel ATTRACTION for men who make them THINK.

 

Women feel ATTRACTION for men who make them FEEL.

 

So what do most smart guys do when they first meet a woman?

 

EXACTLY!

 

They get into a LOGICAL CONVERSATION.

 

I'm shaking my head right now...

 

Smart men try to engage women in LOGICAL conversations and interactions because that's where THEY feel comfortable... not knowing that they're SHOOTING THELSEVES IN THE FOOT by doing it!

 

Get this: A monkey sitting at a typewriter will type the collected works of Shakespeare before you will make a woman feel ATTRACTION for you by engaging her in logical conversation.

 

When you start a logical conversation with a woman you've just met, you are basically taking out a NEON SIGN that says "I don't get it when it comes to women" and putting it on your head.

 

Typical "logical" conversations include talking about work, family, school, and jobs... discussing politics, religion, weather... and anything that has to do with math, science, or INTELLIGENCE.

 

On the other hand, if you start talking to a woman and you say "OK, so tell me something... Why is it that all women say that they want sweet, nice guys... but they all date sexy, selfish bad boys?" (and then make fun of any answer she gives) you're having an EMOTIONAL conversation.

 

If you don't know what I'm talking about, keep reading. You need more help than I thought.

 

 

REASON #7: THEY'RE NOT USED TO THE CHALLENGE OF THE MOMENT

 

Smart people usually have time to THINK about things.

 

If you're taking a test, you can sit there and work out the answers.

 

If you have a math problem, you can work on it until you've figured it out.

 

If you're trying to fix something, you can keep working on it until it's fixed.

 

Smart guys are used to being able to take at least a LITTLE bit of time to prepare and show off their "good sides" in most situations.

 

Not so with women...

 

If you don't know what to do at every step along the way, you'll be shut down very quickly.

 

Women have an AMAZING "He doesn't get it" radar system.

 

Women have all kinds of subtle and ingenious tests that they throw at men to separate the "get its" from the "don't get its".

 

And if you don't get it, then you're going to fail one of these tests VERY quickly.

 

But the worst part is that you won't ever KNOW that you were being tested... OR that you failed.

 

Smart guys aren't used to dealing with complex EMOTIONAL and COMMUNICATION challenges in the moment... and especially the "women and dating" kind.

 

One of they keys to becoming more successful with women and dating is learning to handle all of the tests that women throw at you effortlessly.

 

But before you can learn how to deal with the tests, you must first learn how to communicate on an emotional level, how to demonstrate that you have fundamental social skills, and how to keep your cool in the moment.

 

 

REASON #8: THEY THINK THAT DOING "NICE" THINGS IS THE "SMART WAY"

 

OK, let me ask you a trick question:

 

If I told you that you were going to have a date with the supermodel of your choice, which of the following would you choose as a "smart" way of preparing:

 

1) Find out what her favorite type of flowers are, and show up with a dozen of them so she would be "wowed".

 

2) Learn about her favorite travel destination so you could discuss it with her.

 

3) Find out what her favorite type of food is so you could take her to dinner... and she could see that you cared enough to choose something that she enjoyed.

 

OK, time's up. Which did you choose?

 

Now, I already mentioned that this was a TRICK question.

 

The answer is NONE OF THE ABOVE.

 

But WHY?

 

These three options all seemed logical, right?

 

I mean, why WOULDN'T you want to show up with her favorite flowers?

 

Why WOULDN'T you want to talk about her favorite places to travel?

 

Why WOULDN'T you want to take her to eat her favorite foods so she enjoyed herself?

 

Go with me here...

 

Smart guys think that they're being CLEVER when they do things like buying a woman her favorite flowers... and bringing them to the FIRST DATE.

 

Right?

 

In their minds, they're thinking "I'm going to be the guy who is thinking ahead... and I'm going to show up with the flowers that I KNOW she loves... and she's going to see them and like me more because of it".

 

Makes sense... good math, right?

 

Well the one teensy-weensy mistake that these "smart" guys make is not realizing that it doesn't actually take a smart person to think like this!

 

In fact, ANY jackass can figure out how to kiss a woman's [wagon].

 

And guess what?

 

WOMEN KNOW THIS!

 

And guess what else?

 

EVERY WUSSBAG DOES THIS STUFF.

 

An intelligent guy, in his proud arrogance, will think he's being such the charmer by using this "thoughtful" approach...

 

...and the woman he is chasing will interpret it as just another Wussy who's trying to MANIPULATE her.

 

Ouch. Another blow to intelligence.

 

 

MISTAKE #9: ALWAYS NEEDING TO BE THE EXPERT

 

Have you ever met a smart guy who always needed to be "right"?

 

Have you ever met someone who would actually argue with you about something they knew nothing about... and make a fool of themselves because they just couldn't shut their "smart mouths"?

 

Over the last few years helping guys improve their success with women, I see this one pattern over and over again...

 

Smart guys don't like to be "beginners" at ANYTHING.

 

They don't like the idea of screwing up... especially if others are watching.

 

They want to maintain this "smart guy" image of themselves... so they try to always be "The Expert" at whatever they do.

 

Instead of saying "Hey, you know what? I'm a beginner at this... how do I do it? What should I do first? What next?"... and instead of being totally OK with screwing up, making mistakes, and making a fool of themselves in front of others in order to LEARN...

 

...they won't risk embarrassment, failure, or others thinking that they're beginners... so they wind up ultimately FAILING.

 

MORE NEWS JUST IN: It's OK to be a beginner.

 

 

MISTAKE #10: THEY CAN'T DEAL WITH FEAR AND OTHER EMOTIONS

 

A smart guy's STRENGTH is his MIND.

 

His WEAKNESS is often his EMOTIONS.

 

Smart guys are often IMMOBILIZED by FEAR.

 

Totally stopped.

 

FROZEN.

 

And since many smart guys aren't comfortable dealing with things they're not good at, they just repress or RUN away from fear.

 

Many men would rather DIE in lonely isolation than admit that they don't know how to deal with their emotions... or, GODFORBID, ask for help!

 

Hey, I went for YEARS like this.

 

I know what it's like.

 

But the reality is that any guy can learn to handle and even MASTER his emotions (even fear)... if he just takes the time and effort to learn HOW to do it.

 

If this is you, then do yourself a big favor... take the time. Take the effort.

 

Don't worry about what anyone else thinks of you... it doesn't matter.

 

What matters is you doing the things that YOU need to do FOR YOU.

 

...I think the reason why I'm so fascinated with "The Genius Failure Paradox" is because I have had to struggle with all of these issues for a lot of years of my life.[/hide]

There's a girl at school. I have absolutely no idea who she is and only see her at lunch, which is about 30 minutes of the day. I know nothing about her (name, age), but I really want to meet her. At least find out what grade she's in. Any ideas...

Thats a difficult situation to be in IMO, because it seems like you know absolutely nothing about her (as you stated)

 

Umm, Odd question but how close do you sit to her? And if you possibly want to know more you can always ask a buddy about her. Sometimes helps. Sometimes it doesn't.

 

Best of luck bro. I wish I could give you more. Some of the other folks in here probably will, if they notice your post, so keep things lookin up! ;)

Found this, thought you guys might find it interesting.

 

[hide]The Ten Reasons Why HIGHLY INTELLIGENT Men Fail With Women... AND WHAT TO DO ABOUT IT...

 

I've been teaching men how to become more successful with women and dating for a several years now... and one "problem scenario" just keeps coming up OVER AND OVER... and OVER

and OVER and OVER again...

 

...and it's really amazes me.

 

I'm going to refer to it as "The Genius Failure Paradox".

 

"The Genius Failure Paradox" is the tendency for UNUSUALLY intelligent men to have very LOW levels of success with women and dating.

 

After contemplating this particular paradox, discussing it, and working on it for an awesome amount of time, I'd like to share my thoughts about it with you.

 

I assume that if you've read this far, then you see probably yourself as smarter than the average guy.

 

You know that you're a little different than other guys.

 

You probably realized at a young age that you saw things differently, and thought differently than others in school...

 

And you've probably realized that your smart mind gives you an advantage over others in many areas of life...

 

Your smart mind gives you a particular type of advantage that can be very, very powerful in life: YOU'RE USUALLY RIGHT.

 

Smart people get used to being "right", because they usually ARE right.

 

And when you're RIGHT more often than others, you can get ahead in many situations.

 

But unfortunately, this smart mind of yours can actually be WORSE than USELESS when it comes to a key area of life:

 

WOMEN AND DATING.

 

By the way, I did say WORSE than useless.

 

It can actually be like having a hammer when you need to tighten a bolt. If you use the tool you have for the job, you'll most likely make the situation WORSE.

 

Of course, it's hard for a smart guy to even IMAGINE a situation where his smart mind could HURT his chances for success...

 

But trust me, this is one of those situations.

 

So relax, open your smart mind, and let me share with you the ten reasons why smart guys fail with women... and what to do about it.

 

 

REASON #1: THEY'RE WRONG, BUT THEY CAN'T OR WON'T SEE IT OR ADMIT IT

 

I mentioned that smart guys are used to being RIGHT in most situations.

 

And what do most smart guys do when they come across a situation where they're WRONG?

 

They find a new situation... one that fits their strength. They know they'll be right next time, so they just walk away... knowing that it won't be long before they're right again.

 

(OR they let the "problem situation" destroy them... more on that later.)

 

Well, the [bleep] about being wrong when it comes to women and dating is THERE'S NOWHERE TO RUN AND HIDE.

 

There's no quick "I'm right" around the next corner to make you feel better.

 

It only takes "failing" with a few women in a row for a smart guy to see the pattern... and realize that something isn't working.

 

Solution? Think harder.

 

A smart guy just assumes that his logic must be good... so he just keeps thinking harder.

 

But when no success comes, it really starts

to become mentally difficult.

 

Accepting that you're wrong is a VERY hard thing for a "smart guy".

 

Accepting that you're not only wrong, but you have NO CLUE WHERE TO EVEN START is even more difficult.

 

Ultimately, many smart guys come up with the following logical conclusion:

 

I AM A SMART GUY, THEREFORE IF I CAN'T FIGURE OUT HOW TO BE SUCCESSFUL WITH WOMEN AND DATING, THEN THE PROBLEM MUST NOT BE SOLVABLE OR WORTH SOLVING.

 

Try that on for a self-defeating idea.

 

 

REASON #2: THEY'RE BLIND AND ARROGANT

 

In short, many smart guys refuse to accept that a good, solid, workable answer could come from someone "dumber" than them, so they discount any idea that comes from an "obviously less intelligent person" before trying it.

 

Let me ask you a question:

 

If you were going to be walking across Africa on foot, would you rather have your guide be the guy on this planet with the highest I.Q., or a caveman who lived a million years ago that had an I.Q. of about 50... but who grew up being chased by lions and all kinds of animals that wanted to eat him all his life?

 

It's an interesting question.

 

Now, hopefully you'd like to have the guide who isn't the smartest guy around... but who has escaped from many, many dangerous situations with deadly animals...

 

But now let me ask you:

 

If you'd like to learn how to be more successful with women and dating, would you take advice from a guy who isn't very intelligent, but who knows how to attract women?

 

There's something about being smart that makes some guys unwilling to accept input, ideas, or instruction from anyone who isn't either as smart or smarter than them.

 

Well, any SMART GUY can see the folly in this particular approach... once it's examined closely.

 

If you've been making this mistake, then you need to STOP IT. Stop being an arrogant bastard, and open your eyes.

 

Look around.

 

Learn from some "dumb" guys... and let them teach you how to get what you REALLY want.

 

 

REASON #3: POOR SOCIAL SKILLS

 

It BLOWS MY MIND how many smart guys I meet that just don't GET IT when it comes to basic social skills.

 

It's as if they have logically reasoned that social skills are for lower beings who need to play games... and not worth the time it would take to learn them.

 

In fact, I believe that there are a lot of

smart guys running around this planet who don't

even have "social skills" and "be a cool guy that people like" in their "MENTAL MODEL" of what it could possibly take to be successful with women and dating.

 

Social skills are just that... SKILLS.

 

They're not social INFORMATION.

 

They're not social THEORIES.

 

They're social SKILLS.

 

And you don't get them by THINKING about them. You get them by GETTING them.

 

Excellent social skills are the foundation for good communication with other humans... and if you don't have good social skills, you dramatically lower your chances for success with women.

 

 

REASON #4: THEY PSYCH THEMSELVES OUT

 

Smart guys do something that fascinates the hell out of me...

 

They come up with all the reasons why everything WON'T WORK when it comes to women and dating.

 

They actually figure out why what they would like to do will probably fail...

 

They use their amazing creative imaginations to imagine all kinds of horrible pictures and scenes... and then they use those imaginary outcomes to create negative emotions... which ultimately stop them from having success with women and dating.

 

THEY DON'T EVEN TRY.

 

Now, if you've thought something through and come up with a good reason why it would fail, it makes sense to not do it, right?

 

I mean, why would you want to do things that are going to fail?

 

It's sound logic, but HORRIBLE thinking when it comes to the REAL WORLD... and success with women.

 

Because smart guys don't UNDERSTAND women, and they don't UNDERSTAND what it takes to be successful with women, they are working with bad figures. They're wrong before they even start figuring!

 

Using your mind to come up with all the reasons why things won't work in this area of your life leads to ULTIMATE FAILURE.

 

You must learn to overcome this habit if you have it.

 

 

REASON #5: THEY SEEK ONLY "INFORMATIONAL SOLUTIONS"

 

What does a smart guy do when he runs into a problem... or he needs to figure something out?

 

He looks for INFORMATION to help him solve the problem.

 

MORE INFORMATION is always the answer.

 

Information is the friend of a smart guy.

 

Got a strange virus on your computer? Just hop on the internet and search for how to eliminate it.

 

Don't know how to change the alternator on your car? No prob. Just buy the manual and turn to page 147.

 

Don't know the definition of a word? Open up your dictionary.

 

MORE INFORMATION solves the problem.

 

So what do smart guys do when it comes to overcoming a problem with women?

 

They want MORE INFORMATION.

 

They think the answer lies in learning just ONE MORE TECHNIQUE... or one more magic concept.

 

Well what if there were a situation in life where the "get more information" strategy actually made things WORSE?

 

How would you even know that it was making things worse?

 

Now, I don't want to suggest that learning more about how to be successful with women is a bad thing. It's not.

 

But if you have a problem that is EMOTIONAL or PHYSICAL in nature, then reading five million theories on it probably isn't going to help you very much.

 

You need to get out in the real world and try some stuff!

 

You need to look at the REAL problem... the ROOT of the problem.

 

When it comes to women and dating, there's a very good chance that you have MORE than enough "information".

 

Smart guys often use "more information" to distract them from TAKING ACTION.

 

I've heard this referred to as "Creative Avoidance".

 

Nod silently if you've ever figured out a creative way to avoid facing something in your life.

 

Good, thank you.

 

 

REASON #6: THEY FOCUS ON LOGIC INSTEAD OF EMOTION

 

NEWS JUST IN: Women don't feel ATTRACTION for men who make them THINK.

 

Women feel ATTRACTION for men who make them FEEL.

 

So what do most smart guys do when they first meet a woman?

 

EXACTLY!

 

They get into a LOGICAL CONVERSATION.

 

I'm shaking my head right now...

 

Smart men try to engage women in LOGICAL conversations and interactions because that's where THEY feel comfortable... not knowing that they're SHOOTING THELSEVES IN THE FOOT by doing it!

 

Get this: A monkey sitting at a typewriter will type the collected works of Shakespeare before you will make a woman feel ATTRACTION for you by engaging her in logical conversation.

 

When you start a logical conversation with a woman you've just met, you are basically taking out a NEON SIGN that says "I don't get it when it comes to women" and putting it on your head.

 

Typical "logical" conversations include talking about work, family, school, and jobs... discussing politics, religion, weather... and anything that has to do with math, science, or INTELLIGENCE.

 

On the other hand, if you start talking to a woman and you say "OK, so tell me something... Why is it that all women say that they want sweet, nice guys... but they all date sexy, selfish bad boys?" (and then make fun of any answer she gives) you're having an EMOTIONAL conversation.

 

If you don't know what I'm talking about, keep reading. You need more help than I thought.

 

 

REASON #7: THEY'RE NOT USED TO THE CHALLENGE OF THE MOMENT

 

Smart people usually have time to THINK about things.

 

If you're taking a test, you can sit there and work out the answers.

 

If you have a math problem, you can work on it until you've figured it out.

 

If you're trying to fix something, you can keep working on it until it's fixed.

 

Smart guys are used to being able to take at least a LITTLE bit of time to prepare and show off their "good sides" in most situations.

 

Not so with women...

 

If you don't know what to do at every step along the way, you'll be shut down very quickly.

 

Women have an AMAZING "He doesn't get it" radar system.

 

Women have all kinds of subtle and ingenious tests that they throw at men to separate the "get its" from the "don't get its".

 

And if you don't get it, then you're going to fail one of these tests VERY quickly.

 

But the worst part is that you won't ever KNOW that you were being tested... OR that you failed.

 

Smart guys aren't used to dealing with complex EMOTIONAL and COMMUNICATION challenges in the moment... and especially the "women and dating" kind.

 

One of they keys to becoming more successful with women and dating is learning to handle all of the tests that women throw at you effortlessly.

 

But before you can learn how to deal with the tests, you must first learn how to communicate on an emotional level, how to demonstrate that you have fundamental social skills, and how to keep your cool in the moment.

 

 

REASON #8: THEY THINK THAT DOING "NICE" THINGS IS THE "SMART WAY"

 

OK, let me ask you a trick question:

 

If I told you that you were going to have a date with the supermodel of your choice, which of the following would you choose as a "smart" way of preparing:

 

1) Find out what her favorite type of flowers are, and show up with a dozen of them so she would be "wowed".

 

2) Learn about her favorite travel destination so you could discuss it with her.

 

3) Find out what her favorite type of food is so you could take her to dinner... and she could see that you cared enough to choose something that she enjoyed.

 

OK, time's up. Which did you choose?

 

Now, I already mentioned that this was a TRICK question.

 

The answer is NONE OF THE ABOVE.

 

But WHY?

 

These three options all seemed logical, right?

 

I mean, why WOULDN'T you want to show up with her favorite flowers?

 

Why WOULDN'T you want to talk about her favorite places to travel?

 

Why WOULDN'T you want to take her to eat her favorite foods so she enjoyed herself?

 

Go with me here...

 

Smart guys think that they're being CLEVER when they do things like buying a woman her favorite flowers... and bringing them to the FIRST DATE.

 

Right?

 

In their minds, they're thinking "I'm going to be the guy who is thinking ahead... and I'm going to show up with the flowers that I KNOW she loves... and she's going to see them and like me more because of it".

 

Makes sense... good math, right?

 

Well the one teensy-weensy mistake that these "smart" guys make is not realizing that it doesn't actually take a smart person to think like this!

 

In fact, ANY jackass can figure out how to kiss a woman's [wagon].

 

And guess what?

 

WOMEN KNOW THIS!

 

And guess what else?

 

EVERY WUSSBAG DOES THIS STUFF.

 

An intelligent guy, in his proud arrogance, will think he's being such the charmer by using this "thoughtful" approach...

 

...and the woman he is chasing will interpret it as just another Wussy who's trying to MANIPULATE her.

 

Ouch. Another blow to intelligence.

 

 

MISTAKE #9: ALWAYS NEEDING TO BE THE EXPERT

 

Have you ever met a smart guy who always needed to be "right"?

 

Have you ever met someone who would actually argue with you about something they knew nothing about... and make a fool of themselves because they just couldn't shut their "smart mouths"?

 

Over the last few years helping guys improve their success with women, I see this one pattern over and over again...

 

Smart guys don't like to be "beginners" at ANYTHING.

 

They don't like the idea of screwing up... especially if others are watching.

 

They want to maintain this "smart guy" image of themselves... so they try to always be "The Expert" at whatever they do.

 

Instead of saying "Hey, you know what? I'm a beginner at this... how do I do it? What should I do first? What next?"... and instead of being totally OK with screwing up, making mistakes, and making a fool of themselves in front of others in order to LEARN...

 

...they won't risk embarrassment, failure, or others thinking that they're beginners... so they wind up ultimately FAILING.

 

MORE NEWS JUST IN: It's OK to be a beginner.

 

 

MISTAKE #10: THEY CAN'T DEAL WITH FEAR AND OTHER EMOTIONS

 

A smart guy's STRENGTH is his MIND.

 

His WEAKNESS is often his EMOTIONS.

 

Smart guys are often IMMOBILIZED by FEAR.

 

Totally stopped.

 

FROZEN.

 

And since many smart guys aren't comfortable dealing with things they're not good at, they just repress or RUN away from fear.

 

Many men would rather DIE in lonely isolation than admit that they don't know how to deal with their emotions... or, GODFORBID, ask for help!

 

Hey, I went for YEARS like this.

 

I know what it's like.

 

But the reality is that any guy can learn to handle and even MASTER his emotions (even fear)... if he just takes the time and effort to learn HOW to do it.

 

If this is you, then do yourself a big favor... take the time. Take the effort.

 

Don't worry about what anyone else thinks of you... it doesn't matter.

 

What matters is you doing the things that YOU need to do FOR YOU.

 

...I think the reason why I'm so fascinated with "The Genius Failure Paradox" is because I have had to struggle with all of these issues for a lot of years of my life.[/hide]

I think that addressed a lot of problems that I have. Not that I consider myself all that intelligent, just rational. Copy-pasting that into word for future reference.

I got out of a long term relationship 2 weeks ago and I'm still feeling quite depressed. Can you guys offer some advice to help me end it?

 

Thanks

1. Talk to someone about it you can trust, get it out.

 

2. Get Back out and be flirty again :) Doesn't have to be anything serious, just for fun :D

There's a girl at school. I have absolutely no idea who she is and only see her at lunch, which is about 30 minutes of the day. I know nothing about her (name, age), but I really want to meet her. At least find out what grade she's in. Any ideas...

 

 

Dude, you're in a great position! You don't know the first thing about her, but you know exactly what to ask! Make a conversation out of it. Sit down next to her, say hi and start playing 20 questions. Fresh starts like these are the greatest ppurtunities because both come in with a clean slate.

 

Let us know how this works out :thumbup:

1. Talk to someone about it you can trust, get it out.

 

2. Get Back out and be flirty again :) Doesn't have to be anything serious, just for fun :D

This. Realize that you don't need that person to be happy. Hell, realize that you don't need anyone to be happy, only YOU an make yourself happy.

 

Let it out, then forget about her.

With all those fine [wagon], I mean faces, at Tafe I think I better read The Game again to brush up a bit.

 

WHY is it people call dating a game. THERE'S NO FREAKING SECOND CHANCE/ 1-UP MUSHROOM!

 

 

With that said,

Okay so the fallout with my friend didnt go too bad. still friends but she now swears an oath not to date a guy for a year now that shes done it all. (thanks for rubbing it in)

 

Now there's my other friend. She says she cant ever find the right guy, that Im a nice person, anyone who says no to me is an idoit for not realising what i am like yatta yatta. Im a little lost on weather she likes me, her natural flirtatious charm or just complaining alot (like I do).

She could just be trying to cheer you up. It's what friends do.

The flirtatious attitude doesn't help in the slightest...

With all those fine [wagon], I mean faces, at Tafe I think I better read The Game again to brush up a bit.

 

WHY is it people call dating a game. THERE'S NO FREAKING SECOND CHANCE/ 1-UP MUSHROOM!

 

 

With that said,

Okay so the fallout with my friend didnt go too bad. still friends but she now swears an oath not to date a guy for a year now that shes done it all. (thanks for rubbing it in)

 

Now there's my other friend. She says she cant ever find the right guy, that Im a nice person, anyone who says no to me is an idoit for not realising what i am like yatta yatta. Im a little lost on weather she likes me, her natural flirtatious charm or just complaining alot (like I do).

She could just be trying to cheer you up. It's what friends do.

The flirtatious attitude doesn't help in the slightest...

Flirt back! I have a friend who is flirtatious, flirts with everyone, I just flirt back, good fun.

I got out of a long term relationship 2 weeks ago and I'm still feeling quite depressed. Can you guys offer some advice to help me end it?

 

Thanks

Best advice i can give you is to go have a good cry about it. I know it sounds odd but crying often brings the realization faster. You might not even know it but your mind is still thinking about ways to get back together (kind of subconciously). That is why i say cry. I was in the same situation a year ago and after crying my eyes out for a few hours i felt better. Sure, a 18 year old guy crying over a girl might seem a bit nancy but in the end it helps alot.

 

And not we get to a little problem i have myself. Its very complicated and to flly understand my situation you need to understand the history of my Country. Since there is no time for that i will try and explain best i can.

After living in South Africa for 17 years i moved to a country called Qatar. Ive been here for almost 2 years now. 6 Months ago i met the most amazing girl of my life, the only problem was that she was Pakistani. All my life and all my parents' lives (and their parents, etc, etc) we were brought up in a very concervative way. By this i mean white on white, black on black. I would not considder it a racist way of upbringing because we did know quite a few black people and never once did we see ourself better than them. Although i might have been great freidns with black/non white girls i would never have thought about it being more serious than just friends, its just the way every one in my town was brought up.

So when i met this girl i though, why not? I wont ever be able to tell my parents, but what are the chances of this getting serious? Well, its been 5 and a half months now and we are still together. I cant bring myself to break up with her. I love her so much and i really feel i could do anything for her. Its becime really hard for me to hide it from my parents. The guilt of it is having its toll on my health. I thought about telling my parents many times but there is always one thing that stops me. A while back my Cousin married an Indian girl. He was basically shun from the family. His own parents hardly ever talk to him. I dont want the same thing to happen to me and my family, but on the other hand i really dont want to lose this girl. I'm sure somewhere out there there has to be someone that has experienced what i am right now. I know it was total stupidity to even start seeing her. And i should have ended it as soon as i could feel myself falling for her. I am afriand its too late now. I've tried causing fights between us. Ive tried making her hate me. Ive tried making her leave me so many times because the thought of me having to break up with her kills me. I guess thats if i make her hate me it would hurt her alot less, even though it might hurt me more. I really dont care i just dont want to see her get hurt.

 

Can anyone, anyone at all, offer some kind of advice?

I got out of a long term relationship 2 weeks ago and I'm still feeling quite depressed. Can you guys offer some advice to help me end it?

 

Thanks

Best advice i can give you is to go have a good cry about it. I know it sounds odd but crying often brings the realization faster. You might not even know it but your mind is still thinking about ways to get back together (kind of subconciously). That is why i say cry. I was in the same situation a year ago and after crying my eyes out for a few hours i felt better. Sure, a 18 year old guy crying over a girl might seem a bit nancy but in the end it helps alot.

 

And not we get to a little problem i have myself. Its very complicated and to flly understand my situation you need to understand the history of my Country. Since there is no time for that i will try and explain best i can.

After living in South Africa for 17 years i moved to a country called Qatar. Ive been here for almost 2 years now. 6 Months ago i met the most amazing girl of my life, the only problem was that she was Pakistani. All my life and all my parents' lives (and their parents, etc, etc) we were brought up in a very concervative way. By this i mean white on white, black on black. I would not considder it a racist way of upbringing because we did know quite a few black people and never once did we see ourself better than them. Although i might have been great freidns with black/non white girls i would never have thought about it being more serious than just friends, its just the way every one in my town was brought up.

So when i met this girl i though, why not? I wont ever be able to tell my parents, but what are the chances of this getting serious? Well, its been 5 and a half months now and we are still together. I cant bring myself to break up with her. I love her so much and i really feel i could do anything for her. Its becime really hard for me to hide it from my parents. The guilt of it is having its toll on my health. I thought about telling my parents many times but there is always one thing that stops me. A while back my Cousin married an Indian girl. He was basically shun from the family. His own parents hardly ever talk to him. I dont want the same thing to happen to me and my family, but on the other hand i really dont want to lose this girl. I'm sure somewhere out there there has to be someone that has experienced what i am right now. I know it was total stupidity to even start seeing her. And i should have ended it as soon as i could feel myself falling for her. I am afriand its too late now. I've tried causing fights between us. Ive tried making her hate me. Ive tried making her leave me so many times because the thought of me having to break up with her kills me. I guess thats if i make her hate me it would hurt her alot less, even though it might hurt me more. I really dont care i just dont want to see her get hurt.

 

Can anyone, anyone at all, offer some kind of advice?

 

 

Telling your parents of your relationship is among the hardest pasrts of a relationship. You unfortunatly have it even worse due to conservatism. My suggestion when telling them to make them realize that love doesn't see color or race, it sees emotion. This will be difficult. But do your parents miss your cousin? Ask them smoetime. Ask if they feel bad abuot shunning a family member. Make the mrealize that they were wrong to do so by pointng how how great a guy he was. If you can get your family to accept your cousin, you can get them to accept you.

I got out of a long term relationship 2 weeks ago and I'm still feeling quite depressed. Can you guys offer some advice to help me end it?

 

Thanks

Best advice i can give you is to go have a good cry about it. I know it sounds odd but crying often brings the realization faster. You might not even know it but your mind is still thinking about ways to get back together (kind of subconciously). That is why i say cry. I was in the same situation a year ago and after crying my eyes out for a few hours i felt better. Sure, a 18 year old guy crying over a girl might seem a bit nancy but in the end it helps alot.

 

And not we get to a little problem i have myself. Its very complicated and to flly understand my situation you need to understand the history of my Country. Since there is no time for that i will try and explain best i can.

After living in South Africa for 17 years i moved to a country called Qatar. Ive been here for almost 2 years now. 6 Months ago i met the most amazing girl of my life, the only problem was that she was Pakistani. All my life and all my parents' lives (and their parents, etc, etc) we were brought up in a very concervative way. By this i mean white on white, black on black. I would not considder it a racist way of upbringing because we did know quite a few black people and never once did we see ourself better than them. Although i might have been great freidns with black/non white girls i would never have thought about it being more serious than just friends, its just the way every one in my town was brought up.

So when i met this girl i though, why not? I wont ever be able to tell my parents, but what are the chances of this getting serious? Well, its been 5 and a half months now and we are still together. I cant bring myself to break up with her. I love her so much and i really feel i could do anything for her. Its becime really hard for me to hide it from my parents. The guilt of it is having its toll on my health. I thought about telling my parents many times but there is always one thing that stops me. A while back my Cousin married an Indian girl. He was basically shun from the family. His own parents hardly ever talk to him. I dont want the same thing to happen to me and my family, but on the other hand i really dont want to lose this girl. I'm sure somewhere out there there has to be someone that has experienced what i am right now. I know it was total stupidity to even start seeing her. And i should have ended it as soon as i could feel myself falling for her. I am afriand its too late now. I've tried causing fights between us. Ive tried making her hate me. Ive tried making her leave me so many times because the thought of me having to break up with her kills me. I guess thats if i make her hate me it would hurt her alot less, even though it might hurt me more. I really dont care i just dont want to see her get hurt.

 

Can anyone, anyone at all, offer some kind of advice?

 

 

Telling your parents of your relationship is among the hardest pasrts of a relationship. You unfortunatly have it even worse due to conservatism. My suggestion when telling them to make them realize that love doesn't see color or race, it sees emotion. This will be difficult. But do your parents miss your cousin? Ask them smoetime. Ask if they feel bad abuot shunning a family member. Make the mrealize that they were wrong to do so by pointng how how great a guy he was. If you can get your family to accept your cousin, you can get them to accept you.

Well my dad never liked my cousin anyway so to him it makes no difference. My uncle misses his son ofcourse. It was his first born. Me and my mum went to visit my Cousin last year when we were in South Africa. They all still care but i think they might be a little to afriad to admit it. I;ve thought about the Pros and Cons about telling them. Ive basically come to this:

 

Pros:

I would sleep a whole lot better at night (tbh, i might actually SLEEP).

i would be able to show my parents how happy a person a can be thanx to Roanna.

I wouldnt have to hide one of the best parts of my life.

I can have a more honest relationship with my parents

 

Cons:

Well my dad is a real hard [wagon] so he might kick me out of the house.

If i am not kicked out of the house i will have all my privlages taken away from me.

They could stop me from seeing Roanna.

 

So...it puts me in a real mind-[bleep].

I got out of a long term relationship 2 weeks ago and I'm still feeling quite depressed. Can you guys offer some advice to help me end it?

 

Thanks

Best advice i can give you is to go have a good cry about it. I know it sounds odd but crying often brings the realization faster. You might not even know it but your mind is still thinking about ways to get back together (kind of subconciously). That is why i say cry. I was in the same situation a year ago and after crying my eyes out for a few hours i felt better. Sure, a 18 year old guy crying over a girl might seem a bit nancy but in the end it helps alot.

 

And not we get to a little problem i have myself. Its very complicated and to flly understand my situation you need to understand the history of my Country. Since there is no time for that i will try and explain best i can.

After living in South Africa for 17 years i moved to a country called Qatar. Ive been here for almost 2 years now. 6 Months ago i met the most amazing girl of my life, the only problem was that she was Pakistani. All my life and all my parents' lives (and their parents, etc, etc) we were brought up in a very concervative way. By this i mean white on white, black on black. I would not considder it a racist way of upbringing because we did know quite a few black people and never once did we see ourself better than them. Although i might have been great freidns with black/non white girls i would never have thought about it being more serious than just friends, its just the way every one in my town was brought up.

So when i met this girl i though, why not? I wont ever be able to tell my parents, but what are the chances of this getting serious? Well, its been 5 and a half months now and we are still together. I cant bring myself to break up with her. I love her so much and i really feel i could do anything for her. Its becime really hard for me to hide it from my parents. The guilt of it is having its toll on my health. I thought about telling my parents many times but there is always one thing that stops me. A while back my Cousin married an Indian girl. He was basically shun from the family. His own parents hardly ever talk to him. I dont want the same thing to happen to me and my family, but on the other hand i really dont want to lose this girl. I'm sure somewhere out there there has to be someone that has experienced what i am right now. I know it was total stupidity to even start seeing her. And i should have ended it as soon as i could feel myself falling for her. I am afriand its too late now. I've tried causing fights between us. Ive tried making her hate me. Ive tried making her leave me so many times because the thought of me having to break up with her kills me. I guess thats if i make her hate me it would hurt her alot less, even though it might hurt me more. I really dont care i just dont want to see her get hurt.

 

Can anyone, anyone at all, offer some kind of advice?

 

 

Telling your parents of your relationship is among the hardest pasrts of a relationship. You unfortunatly have it even worse due to conservatism. My suggestion when telling them to make them realize that love doesn't see color or race, it sees emotion. This will be difficult. But do your parents miss your cousin? Ask them smoetime. Ask if they feel bad abuot shunning a family member. Make the mrealize that they were wrong to do so by pointng how how great a guy he was. If you can get your family to accept your cousin, you can get them to accept you.

Well my dad never liked my cousin anyway so to him it makes no difference. My uncle misses his son ofcourse. It was his first born. Me and my mum went to visit my Cousin last year when we were in South Africa. They all still care but i think they might be a little to afriad to admit it. I;ve thought about the Pros and Cons about telling them. Ive basically come to this:

 

Pros:

I would sleep a whole lot better at night (tbh, i might actually SLEEP).

i would be able to show my parents how happy a person a can be thanx to Roanna.

I wouldnt have to hide one of the best parts of my life.

I can have a more honest relationship with my parents

 

Cons:

Well my dad is a real hard [wagon] so he might kick me out of the house.

If i am not kicked out of the house i will have all my privlages taken away from me.

They could stop me from seeing Roanna.

 

So...it puts me in a real mind-[bleep].

 

 

Yeah, that's the problem about conservitive parents, they're rather intollerant. it's good that your mom still cares about your cousin though. That means she'd probably fight for you. So that's half the battle. The rest is convincing your father. May I suggest introducing her as a friend first? As you said, they aren't racist, they just don't believe in interracial couples. Maybe if you introduce her as a friend, your father won't mind. Yes, you'll be lying, but the more and more they see you with her, the more they'll start taking the hint. You many want to tell your mom in private though if you do do this.

 

Yes that does sound like the plot to a really dumb indy movie, but direct approaches don't usually work on conservatives. Especially the really hardcore ones. I mean, you are his son, but how much bargaining power do you think that will win you?

 

I also recommend moving out of the house soon. That way your father doesn't have as much leverage in the decisions you make. It's your life, not his. And he needs to be more supportive of his son. You've done your part. You showed him loyalty, even kept something from him to maintain the family tranquility. It's his turn to do something for you. That something would be accpeting the race of your love partner.

I have introduced her as a friend before. My fathers respose was odd. He aked me alot of questions the next day. Kind of like he was accepting her. My mother on the other hand had a slight hostile attatude towards the situation. I found this really odd. Moving out of the house is not an option for me. Atleast not till i'm 21 or so. Its hard to explain, but this country has strange ways. Also, my dad kicking me out of the house is very unlikely but he has a strange way of thnking so there is always the 1% chance. I dont think they would make the same mistake with me as they did with my older sister (long story). I guess i know what i should do. Maybe i just need someone to tell me what a big [kitty] i am. Someone that could pull some reverse phychology on me.

My family is my everything. Dissapointing them is not easy but going against my heart is even harder.