"I want a girlfriend/boyfriend", and other such relationship advice

[____]

Almost tempted.

[IGoddessI]

Things will get better Ricky *fluffles*

[____]

*shrug* Eventually. Ask again at the end of the year.

[Ginger_Warrior]

I'm sensing bad vibes coming from Rick... I hope it gets better for ya. :

 

 

 

Unfortunately, I actually agree with him. Time doesn't heal everything. The emotions that we felt at the time are still in our memory, and we still experience those emotions everytime we have to be reminded about what happened in the past. The baring those emotions have over our lives does slowly fade over time, but it doesn't solve everything. Problems, anxieties, anger - they still have to be confronted.

 

 

 

IeatWindex: Don't blow out in anger at her. Let's play a game and see if she really is as trustworthy as she presumably made herself out to be.

 

 

 

Don't talk to her. Don't even text her. Let her come to you and see if she'll own up to what was going on. If she tries to act like nothing has happened, you know she's trying to lie and you can move on in the knowledge you gave her a chance. If she does own up, try and talk about it. Ask her what was going so wrong

 

in your relationship she went off and cheated on you.

 

 

 

Hate only creates more hate though, so don't go down that route. Religious as that sounds, it's true.

[IGoddessI]

The emotions that we felt at the time are still in our memory, and we still experience those emotions everytime we have to be reminded about what happened in the past.

 

 

 

I didn't say time makes your problems vanish, I said it heals, which it does. This means the problem is still sometimes there, however small or big depends on the individual.

 

 

 

Problems, anxieties, anger - they still have to be confronted.

 

 

 

Yes and each also needs time :P

 

 

 

@ the advice you gave windex:

 

 

 

Brent never would have ever found out that I cheated on him because he was away in the army. I could've keep it a secret and knew that we'd be together, happily for life. The very next night I rang him and told him everything that happened, full well knowing I could have lost the best thing that happened to my life by owning up to what I did.

 

 

 

When a girl cheats on you, depending how she acts afterwards is completely relevant so bravo for your comment. Hate doesn't fix anything and you're absolutely right.

 

 

 

Brent handled it very well, it didn't even seem to affect him. All he cared about was I told him the truth and he knew it would never happen again because of my honesty and he was right. I'm also never afraid to approach him no matter how bad things get because of how calmly he handles issues. Because of this, I don't ever hide anything from him.

 

 

 

Maybe you could take something from that windex.

[IeatWindex]

I accidently left something out. Before I ran far away, she stopped making out with this stupid douche bag (sorry), gave me a seductive smile kind of look, and then continued.

 

 

 

I just hope I calm myself down before I do something that will get me jailed. Like killing that guy.

[Kiriyama]

She isn't worth getting revenge on the guy.

 

 

 

Though you could pull a (mostly) harmless prank on her.

[IeatWindex]

Im higher than she is. I won't stoop down to her level, and Im moving on. Im going to blow her off. This is the second time she did this, NO more chances.

[Ginger_Warrior]

Im higher than she is. I won't stoop down to her level, and Im moving on. Im going to blow her off. This is the second time she did this, NO more chances.

 

So she actually saw you watching her and she didn't even attempt to stop or explain herself?

 

 

 

OK, leave her... :?

[Kiriyama]

Im higher than she is. I won't stoop down to her level, and Im moving on. Im going to blow her off. This is the second time she did this, NO more chances.

 

 

 

Wait.

 

 

 

She did this before? Was she sober at the time? If so, then she didn't deserve that second chance.

[IeatWindex]

Oh yea, she was definetly sober. If she wasn't, I bet she would of did girls instead >.> Yea, she had intercourse that time. She maybe did this time aswell.

[Faux]

Be thankful you found out sooner than later. You'll be angry and upset for a while the only thing that cures heartache is time.

I'm almost tempted to disagree with that; and you'd know why. At least, thankfully, his situation wasn't as involved as mine. But yea.. over time it heals, just takes a long, long time... occasionally.

 

 

 

Same with mine. I was lucky to realize how whorish she was becoming before she had the chance to cheat on me.

 

 

 

I'm at a anti-relationship phase atm. :?

[IGoddessI]

Im higher than she is. I won't stoop down to her level, and Im moving on. Im going to blow her off. This is the second time she did this, NO more chances.

 

 

 

*wiggles magic fingers* bad juju for you! (the ex) :P

 

 

 

You are doing a very mature thing though so well done mate

[OldDucky]

Goddess! I could never see you cheating on anyone! :o As kind-hearted as you are. :shock:

[IGoddessI]

People make mistakes and those who learn from them create a better self :) but thank you for the angelic image hehe

 

 

 

Brent was in the army and was going to be away for about 6-7 months it wasn't until he was away that I started to regret getting in to the whole "army wife life". It was much easier to believe I could do it before he was actually gone. It got to me real bad, I couldn't call him on the phone, I couldn't write letters, then other thoughts got to me. Thoughts like not being able to see him for up to two years at a time, we wouldn't be able to have a family together. One thing led to another and I took advantage of a situation where someone was there to comfort me when he wasn't.

 

 

 

I made a phone call, explained everything and he was home 2 weeks later for valentines day. He gave up the army to be with me and have a family.

 

 

 

I'm not proud of it but I honestly believed we weren't going to stay together. It doesn't help either when you know at least 7 army wives who get treated like crap when their husband gets home. I take my hat off to some of the things they do and go through but it changes them.

 

 

 

I feel guilty about ruining his dream but he decided his dream to spend his life with me and have a family was bigger than the army.

[BlackDawn]

congratulations on having a great guy goddess.

[Dalcyte]

Getting cheated on sucks...sorry to hear that. But just basically follow the advice of others..

 

 

 

Time doesn't heal everything, but for what it doesn't heal, it's basically like neosporin. It helps. These things burn a lot at the beginning, but as you start to meet other people and do other things, you start to forget. I mean, when it's been 2 years, it will leave a scar no doubt. But just give it time and ignore her unless she comes up to you and apologises.

[Flu]

I feel like my girlfriend doesn't want to see me any more. We went out for lunch the otehr day (No specifics) and we had a wonderful time afterwards (again, no specifics) but since then she's been ignoring my texts. I feel like i'm being used here. -.-

 

 

 

Don't get me wrong, i love her to biuts, and i know for definate hat she loves me, but i have that feeling that i'm kinda getting abit used by her. And i'm not leaving her because of it, she means too much to me, i just need some way of finding out what's going on in her head...

 

 

 

She's getting a hard time at school at the moment, buyt won't talk to me about it either. I think it might be a lot to do with the bullying at school, but when she can't talk to me about it i feel like a lemon.

 

 

 

I'm a caring sort of guy and i would never want to see my girlfriend upset, but i relly think this bullying at school is kind of tearing her life apart, and i'm part of that life that's getting torn apart. It hurts me to think that she can't even talk to me, of all people. she really needs to talk but there isn't any way i can get her to do it. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place :wall:

[Ginger_Warrior]

I want to share something that I'd actually completely forgot about when I made my first two posts about this - the fact I have actually been cheated on two times by two different girls (disclaimer: although if anyone tries to mount libel against me, one of them denies she ever did, despite telling my best mate she actually did. Yeah... :roll: )

 

 

 

Did it hurt at the time? Yes - definitely. I remember at the time a lot of hate started being flung around the group of friends we were a part of. It became factionalised, some on my side of the fence, some loyal to her. I refused to talk to her, and I maintained that for one and a half years until three weeks before we left school for good. By that point, there was no chance of her creeping back into my life anyway; but also, I'd moved on, grown up and most importantly, I'd found someone else.

 

 

 

Because in that chaos I found two girls who were themselves quite mature, experienced emotionally and wise. We all went on to become our own group of friends. I have to admit, being with them was probably the happiest point of my life - certainly the point where I felt least anxiety anyway. I became quite confident, even arrogant, and I came out of the shell I'd lived in up until that point. It was like I woke up to the world. I actually came really close and trustful towards one of them. This is the person I was talking about before.

 

 

 

The point I'm making is this - things do genuinely get better, and what's more, you actually come out a lot stronger than you did before you even entered all this. You've matured emotionally through experience and that makes you a better and wiser person in the long run. You'll also meet new people that are better than her, despite however much you think that's impossible at the moment.

 

 

 

flu - have you actually asked her why she's not answering your texts? If you haven't, I wouldn't suggest harassing her for an answer, but when you're next alone with each other, just tell her what you're concerned about, and that you think it might the bullying.

 

 

 

I don't think you're being used.

 

 

 

If she won't talk to you, get her to talk to a counsellor instead. That is exactly what they're there for. It's not uncommon for people to prefer talking to someone else other than their boyfriend about their worries, and it doesn't mean they don't trust their boyfriends.

[Returned3]

Basic young Teenager problem - I like this girl in my class, how do I get to know her more and ask her out and hopefully become her boyfriend?

[dsavi]

I wish I could help you, I'm in more or less the same situation :P I asked that on the previous thread before the rollback and all I really remember is this: Passing notes is the worst thing you could do.

[BlackDawn]

Basic young Teenager problem - I like this girl in my class, how do I get to know her more and ask her out and hopefully become her boyfriend?

 

 

 

try walking up to her and starting a conversation, get to know her like that :P

 

 

 

(i suck at advice but i feel like being helpful)

[Returned3]

Thanks for the 2 advices, but are there any more detailed advices? (Not that I dont appreciate both of you guys' posts).

 

 

 

Its the usual "Im nervous when talking to her" situation and anyone have ideas on what I should chat with her? I've wasted 7 months on staring afar (Stalker in the making?)

 

 

 

At this point, I really feel like just going up and telling her and whether she rejects or accepts me, I'll let it end/continue at that point depending on her answer. <-- Is that smart?

[BlackDawn]

hmm, ill see if i can help more with this.

 

 

 

Maybe find out a few things about her from her friends, they might be nice enough to help you out with this.

[dragoonson]

Staring from afar is fine,in fact,try to catch her eye...Its kind of hard to finish this advice without knowing what you usually do in class,though...But considering nervousnes (God,thats probably not a word) when talking to her,think of her as a friend,and really open up...I guess,I haven't done this thing in class,though.

 

 

 

SMS for ever...Only in Chinese lessons,kids.

 

 

 

Blackdawn's somewhat right too.Considering 7 months in a sec 3 class you should know her somewhat well,too.